Have we even posted about the comical NY-23 special congressional election yet? Don’t think so! Fortunately lazy Hollywood dandy Fred “Dipshit McGoo” Thompson, who pretended to run for president once, for about two months, before losing miserably everywhere, has provided us with the perfect on-ramp here.
He, along with Michele Bachmann, Sarah Palin, most Republican bloggers, Glenn Beck, and the rest of “those people,” has endorsed the Conservative Party candidate, Doug Hoffman, over the Republican candidate, Dede Scozzafava. Their problem with Dede Scozzafava is, hmm, maybe that she’s a FUCKING COMMUNIST MAOIST LIBERAL SACK OF FUCK? (We’re not sure; it has something to do with her hesitance to blanket-demonize the concept of a “labor union.”)
Doug Hoffman is a Real Conservative, however: he will never spend a dollar of money, kill babies, say “hi” to a black person, allow laborers to organize, suggest Rush Limbaugh modify his tone, or not declare random wars. Fred Thompson believes in Doug Hoffman, and we believe in Fred Thompson! Doug Hoffman is a “neighbor” for heaven’s sake. This means that he lives near other humans, in NY-23! Doug Hoffman is so cool. How cool? Let’s just say he’s “post-Eric Cantor.” That cool.
Anyway, check out Fred Thompson’s pederstache, through the gritty cellphone camera footage, it’s a real home run…