Wonkette
Mike Allen with the scoop! Some mutual friends of his and fat obnoxious Republican operative space demon Roger Ailes suggest, anonymously, that Roger Ailes might run for president. Not even idle speculation — it could really happen, says THE POLITICO CLICK, an offshoot of the mothership that focuses on such things as donkey sex and donkey fingering.
Friends and associates are encouraging Fox News chief Roger Ailes to jump into the political arena for real by running for president in 2012, top sources tell POLITICO.
“Ailes knows how to frame an issue better than anybody, and that’s what we need now,” says one Ailes friend who is encouraging the Fox founder, chairman and CEO to seek the Republican nomination to run against President Barack Obama.
Frame an issue better than anybody! Dear god. It’s over, Mike Allen. It’s over. Please stop transcribing tapes of your soothing ocean sounds.
Politico Begins Posting Fox News Slashfic [Gawker]
Ailes/Jabba the Hutt 2012!
He’ll for sure have the sympathy/empathy vote of all the fat, greasy slobs in this country.
Ailes! What will Governor Palin have to say about that? Meg Stapleton, we await your word.
Mike Allen wrote this before getting a recurring gig on Fox n Fucktards? We’ll see what J. Sco has to say about this infidelity!
Great, Jabba The Fucking Hutt as president. But hey, maybe if he wins Carrie Fisher will put on the gold bikini and strangle him with a chain….
I think this would be about as exciting as the long awaited Fred Thompson entry into the arena.
zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Lascauxcaveman: Ailes/Jabba the Hutt …
But you repeat yourself.
Watch your back, Jim! Every bounty hunter in the galaxy will be looking for you.
What is this I don’t even.
A++ headline, Gawker, would LOL again.
Great, maybe if he gets elected Carrie Fisher will put on the gold bikini and strangle him with a chain….
I remember when all “sucking up” meant was complimenting the boss on his tie. Now you have to tell him he oughta be president or pope of Ming the Merciless in order to be a proper suck-up. WHERE WILL IT END!?!?!?!?
Friends of Obama pushed Ailes off a cliff, for the president. (fixed)
In real life, I heartily disapprove of Ailes running. The last vestiges of old republic would be swept away, replaced by universal, stage-managed (mis)informational warfare cloaked in Presidential pageantry.
In Wonkett life, I want this to happen, for hilarity’s sake.
With Ailes appealing to the old, scared, white vote and the new GOP web site bringing in the fresh, young, hip-hop crowd, how can they lose in 2012?
Great, I can’t wait to see all the Obama-is-Willie-Horton
adsnews stories on Faux.Oh, and I for one welcome our new fat slimy overlords also.
Roger Ailes — giving corrupt, manipulative, megalomaniacal evil trolls a bad name since 1980.
Dick Cheney’s clone but without all the annoying compassion.
Wait. “Donkey sex” and “donkey fingering” are not the same? This is newsworthy.
Lascauxcaveman: Ailes/U. Whatever
I think there’s something in the Constitution that says if you are the closeted slave of an Australian megolomaniac then any vote for you for president only counts as 3/5 the value of a vote for a Kenyan. It has something to do with keeping out of foreign entanglements and making sure Alexander Hamiltin can never run for president. Something like that. Anyway, it’s going to be hard for Roger to beat Obama with that kind of handicap.
So, what do you read Mr. Ailes?
Also, does he get to go on Oprah?
He’s a Republican? I thought Fox News was fair and balanced.
So we could have the man who gave us the Willie Horton ad running against a black President. At least the racism at the Palin/McCain (and you know that’s how the true believers thought of the ticket) rallies was confined to the crowds and warm-up speakers…
Can Roger Ailes “take it to the streets”?
There’s a sister article on Politico declaring that Roger Ailes is not going to run, but then they quote Frank Luntz who says “I’ve known Roger Ailes for 29 years, he knows how to WIN” or some such folderol. Boy if you were feeling heartsick over lack of coverage of Roger Ailes in the press, this is a red letter day for you.
Why is Politico afraid to quote friends of Roger Ailes for attribution? Is it because THEY ARE GHEY?
Let him run. Then we’ll get to see what nastiness resides in his closet.
What the foxtrot tango delta is going on over there?
http://www.politico.com/click/stories/0910/ailes_declines_12_draft.html
JohnnyMeatworth: Hutt/Slave Leia ‘12!!
Why does Ailes need to run for President to frame issues? He’s already successfully doing just exactly that.
What is it with these fat jowly bald GOPers?
If Roger ran, could his jowls be his running mate since they occupy space in the next State?
Has that other fat sack of shit Gingrich approved this message? I DON’T THINK SO.
POLITICOOOO!!!!
That’s all we need is Ailes throwing his weight around.
germansteel: Might just be enough for a win.
If Tailgunner Joe McCarthy was still around he’d be the heads-on favorite.
While stating he would not run, Ailes said, “Besides, I can’t take the pay cut.”
Yeah, it takes a lot of money to run the dungeon holding those Latin boy sex slaves that Roger and his buddy Dick Cheney feed off of.
Oh yes, that’s all we’re lacking. Someone to ‘frame’ the issues
“Our Friend The Fat Toxic Slug…” Gee, what have slugs ever done to you, Jim?
I think you meant “Our Friend the Fat Toxic Sludge…”
You’re welcome.
Roger is what Ailes me.
In Ailes’ America, white kids won’t get beat up on the school bus ever.
JMP: Do forget it’s companion piece, the b&w “Revolving Door” ad, which ended with an Afro-wielding ne’er-do-well giving the camera a slo-mo stink eye.
Mr Blifil: Do you have any idea the number of friends one needs to push someone of his size? Until the Internet Freedom Act passes, POSHITICO simply can not afford the amount of bandwidth required to list them all.
Decker: “Mmmmmm. Uga. Spasteelia a bunkadunka. Race a spuce adoobla!”
Canmon (the Inadequate): FOX News is not a political arm of the republican party, FOX News is not a political arm of the republican party, FOX News is not a political arm of the republican party.
If you say it over and over again, it starts to sound true-ish,
I think it has more to do with no Republican politicians polling higher than the low teens than any groundswell to draft Ailes for President. Shortly, they’ll be asking random people on the bus if they’d be willing to sell their souls for a chance to be the candidate of a major (regional) political party.
“Lesson number two: Don’t get high on your own supply.” - Elvira, Scarface
If Roger Ailes thinks he can run for President, then it’s possible he’s been dipping into the bukket filled with the special Kool-Aid over at Fox.
Talk about wet dreams come true, next to Palin and Rush Limbaugh running this is would be epic.
Canmon (the Inadequate): What? You think those who work in journalism should maintain the appearance of impartiality? HAHAHAHA. That’s rich and oh so quaint.
THIS IS GREAT NEWS1!! FOR JOHN MCzzzzz…zzzz…zzzz…zzz
He needs to run for president of Lifestyle Lift.
JohnnyMeatworth: Win.
I don’t really support Ailes. Now a good stout or a porter, that I can get behind.
Don’t people like Thompson and Ailes have anyone around them who look them in the eye and just say no? As in, “No, sir, this just isn’t a good idea. Outside of, like, maybe 5000 fervid supporters, there’s nothing?
I ask this in all seriousness, because it seems to me they live in an impenetrable bubble of inflated egoism — and egotism.
Cheney’s next.
Cant wait to see the debates where burger-chucks fly out of his mouth as he speaks.
I-man: Limbaugh/Ailes 2012! They’d need steel reinforcement for joint appearances.
Ailes/Palin. Wouldn’t that sort of be like the GOP dream ticket? And they wouldn’t have to spend much on the campaign because they’d get all their messages broadcast free 24/7 by Faux News.
qwerty42: I like the idea of an Ailes/Palin ticket! They could dress up as Jabba the hut and Princess leia! A sure lock on the star wars nerd vote and the younger male vote.
It’s such a delight to see representatives of an ideology to which only a maximum of 30% of the population still subscribes delude themselves that THEY CAN TOO YET BE WINNERZ!
On the up side, if he did run some hippy social studies teacher could update a meme:
“And Roger Ailes? Roger Ailes stayed fat.”
People like Ailes don’t have “friends and associates,” they have ass-kissing employees who say whatever he wants to hear. They probably tell him he should be on the cover of GQ too.
Mr Blifil: The dream is dead.
But let us not wallow in the valley of despair, I say to you today, my friends.
Roger the Hutt would not so much run for President as he would slither.
Extemporanus: “Don’t forget its…” Greta get’s it, but I dont.
BlueStateLibtard: Indeed. Witness this cycle’s gubernatorial and Senate races in California (Whitman and Fiorina).
The Rs haven’t had much of a bench in California basically since Pete Wilson screwed the pooch for them in ‘94. The Governator didn’t have a primary to deal with in the recall election (which, due to The Rules, could have been won on a plurality, not a majority). It’s possible that he would have survived one due to his Star Power, but other moderate Rs have been pretty much SOL thanks to the increasingly wingnutty base.
All Ailes and the rest want is a President who will:
lower taxes on the wealthiest, including the estate tax
quash all governmental regulations concerning business especially antitrust and corporate taxation
end any sort of labor or employee voices and concerns
To get that they must put up with:
‘values’ issues such as God, guns, and gays
ignoring science and other countries regarding the environment and health concerns of their products
and:
control the daily news flow
marginalize any other ideas
discredit academia. the arts, and foreign influences
At this point I’m afraid there’s anything anyone can do to halt this.
The sound of bottom being scraped is apparent when mentioning the aptly named Roger Ailes. To paraphrase Mr. Dylan, “between the windows of the booth, where fat producers blow, and nobody has to think too much, on Desperation Row.”
kinda weak, but I have to leave quick.
http://blingee.com/blingee/view/101091332-Run-Roger-RUN-
chascates: You mean, they have to pull a Berlusconi?
lawrenceofthedesert: Isn’t that ‘Desolation Row’? A fantastic song/poem.
here’s a remake now that I had time…
http://blingee.com/blingee/view/101097034-Run-Roger-Run-v2-0
I can just picture the debates between Ailes and Obama. Stunning political theater, that.
GreatOldOnesParty: You definitely put the “big” in “ambiguity”.
And, for that matter, the “bi”.
Would a “Roger Ailes/Rush Limbaugh 2012″ ticket tip the scales in favor of the Republicans? With a couple of such heavy weights how could they miss?
The evil grinch demon/obese chinch bug for president? wow…now if only we can run Limbaugh for vice president, we’ll be all set. One is obese, racist, cruel and generally a barnacle feasting on societies brine and the other, oh wait, this describes them both pretty aptly. If Ailes runs for prez…do you think we can get Willie Horton released just long enough to strangle him? on second thought…nuts to Rush (he sits down and consumes them) it’s time to go for the full gainer and make Newt his VP. They can have twitter civil war re-enactments from the oval office with the loser having to sleep with Newt’s 18th wife. I wonder if Hopey would eschew the debates and instead just to walk up and punch Ailes in his fat, pasty smug face for all the shit he’s been talking disseminated through his mindless turds at faux….nice thought.
president of what?!?! sneers snake plesskin!
He’s go the most presidential jowels since Herbert Hoover
I support insurance paying for jowl reduction and neck waddle revampment.
bopumofu: As impressive were the jowls of lowly Herbert Hoover, the veritable king of American presidential jowls was the American president and Professional Criminal Richard Nixon, who’s jowls were “famous to children”, even.
Nascent circle-jerk in 3..2..1