Wonkette
- Erick Erickson harvested a mighty army of orcs and then instructed them to purchase 1200 pounds of rock salt as a special present for traitorous Maine-witch Olympia Snowe. But will Senator Snowe take the hint and melt? [RedState]
- The Republican Insurgency Manifesto. [Ace of Spades]
- How easy would it be to bribe Glenn Beck? David Frum would be willing to offer him fifty Sacajawea gold coins and a hand job, but there’s a catch! [The Plank]
- Yes sir, this is our “volunteer army.” [Think Progress]
- Senator Iselin and Gateway Pundit have compiled a list of the names of 207 persons who are known by the Secretary of Defense as being members of the Communist Party! [Gateway Pundit]
“…rock salt as a special present for traitorous Maine-witch Olympia Snowe.”
maybe they should have tried spilling a little water on her. i dunno, worked in the movie.
Dang, Riley, you’re hitting the fever swamps today.
Sean Hannity would need the offer explained a few times
Oh No He Di’nt!
Read the Ace of Spades link, and think made me more stupider it did. Huh? He thinks conservative activists should take over the Republican party - you know, the party that is completely controlled by far-right activists.
From the RIMers (Repub Isurgency Manual)
Second, a lot of us are frustrated because we feel like we don’t have power or influence.
That’s because when you guys were running the show (all THREE branches of the Federales Gubbiment as many of you loved to yell out), you fucked up huge. Still don’t really get that, do you?
JMP: That was a typo. He meant conservative archivists should take over the party. No, I don’t know what it means, either.
No he really meant bags of rock salt should take over the republican party. They can’t possibly do any worse.
The commenters on Gateway Pundit seem nice.
Yeah, that’s not how I’ve seen the GOP function on the county level. Basically, if you have the $$$ to pay, then you get to play. All of their leadership at county level comes from local people who have fun day jobs like “attorney.” If you’re not part of their clique or offer up wads of cash, then you don’t matter. Just like in real life.
magic titty: yeah what the fuck do you send us to places like that for Riley? I never once even mentioned raping you like some other wonketiers have…
magic titty: “The current administration and the Democratic majority in Congress has shown little regard for the will of the people”
Sure they are, Mr. “bg”; how did the Obama administration and Democrats in Congress take power again, anyway? Maybe we can come up with some system where the people can kick them out and replace them with Republicans if the majority want to…
Chris Orr wins the Internet for this bon mot:
For my part, I’m not nearly so convinced of Beck, as his particular form of derangement suggests biological rather than commercial origins. And I’d put Coulter, whose every breath reeks of cynical opportunism, at the top of the “yes” list.
Although he was far too nice about Mann Coltface’s breath, which reeks more of rotted sardines, cheap gin, and fermented dog shit.
JMP: The GOP conservatives are our own Iraqi Sunnis — spoiled for so long that they now truly believe they’re in the majority, just held back by some devious force they can neither identify nor explain. And they were so close to making America perfect forever, too.
JMP: hobospacejunkie: Or maybe it was conservative anarchists — you know, the ones that just want to chain the doors to the federal building shut instead of blowing it up.
Glenn Beck is a College of the Ozarks graduate.
Liberal piffle!!! wait..wait..wait..
LIBERAL PIFFLE!!!!! (had to get my caps on)…What about the Nobama-Muslin-Congressional Page scandal! There are Muslins on my congress critters telephone!!! Muslins!!! If I want to report a Maoist administration official, I gotta talks to a Muslin!! My mouth is committing sins and I’m not even getting my normal rate ($5, spit no swallow). This is not change I can believe in and I wonder why only Glenn Beck (blessing and peace upon his name) is reporting this Islamix-Jihadi-Demoncrap scandal! How can we allow Muslins to take over all the low paying jobs on Capitol Hill! What about the Messicans? I thought they were supposed to get the low paying jobs?
Can it really be called a handjob when the head doesn’t peek past the thumb?
ManchuCandidate:
Good points. Some of those commenters who feel they lack power or influence should get up from their mothers’ basements and get jobs or go to school. That might improve their situation some.
Okay, Wonkette. I need your help translating this comment from Gateway Pundit’s “Gus”.
1. Let’s review.
Mommy slut commie.
I guess that’s as self-explanatory as it is indefensible, but what the fuck is…
2. Daddy drunk Muzz commie,? Seriously? What is a Muzz, and is it possible to Muzz-rig something?
3. Frank Marshall Davis, Head commie, Davis was a reporter who dabbled in poetry and labor issues. Where was he, relative to Brezhnev, that he’s the Head fucking commie? Can somebody add something beyond the Wiki?
I thought we had won the Cold War, folks, but it looks like the good people at Gateway Pundit believe Reagan might have pulled his legacy out of the oven a few minutes early. Communism’s back, and they’re all uppity Negroes/Muzzae.
magic titty: The commenters on Gateway Pundit seem nice.
Heh! They’re just like us, only completely backwards! And more cut-n-pasty, and talking-to-themselves-ish.
And not-funny; yeah, there’s that, too. OK, they’re not very much like us.
A hand job is still a job.
ManchuCandidate: So true, they act as if some invisible magical force resulted in them getting booted out. Thus I suppose all their references to melting witches, Narnia, pretend military coups, etc.
Terry: If it’s all the same to you, I’d rather they stayed in the basement.
Aflac Shrugged: “Can somebody add something beyond the Wiki?”
No, but I can add something to the Wiki.
Riley:
Any time someone offers you “fifty Sacajawea gold coins and a hand job,” there is always a catch. Didn’t you learn anything when you were brought on at Wonkette?
ManchuCandidate: Let’s be clear, one of the greatest averted disasters is that Dubya wasn’t some evil conservative genius/Manchurian Candidate, rather, he was a just a dumb fuck-up, in general. For as much as Bush’s fuck-ups costed us, actual conservative ideology had very few wins during his two terms. They didn’t get a federal ban on gay marriage or abortion, they didn’t get to dismantle the Department of Education, they didn’t get us back on the gold standard, etc…Bush’s biggest fuck-ups (which I guess you could classify as “wins”, for him), ideologically, were mostly abroad. A lot of the stuff he fucked-up domestically was the result of ridiculous neglect. The real fundies and conservatives were mostly kept at arms length, so much so that his Faith-based Intiatives guy wrote a book on how he played the fundie Evangeicals like a fiddle.
ManchuCandidate: Well, most of the wanna-be oligarchs and robber-barons didn’t get any clout or privileges, just screwed like the rest of us. They won’t blame their masters, though, they’ll us other poor people for holding them back.
G-d only knows what kind of rampage they’ll go on when they finally lose hope in the Rapture!
Dear Wonkette –
I encourage you to start up a campaign to get folks to send in truck nutz to Red State at their DC offices to commend them on the plastic cojones it took to mount their silly stunt. Seems they got 240 folks to take them up on the rock salt gig; I’m sure you could get about that many to respond to a truck nutz campaign.
I am now convinced that the tenth repetitive rock salt item has been published specifically to drive me crazy and/or make me quit visiting this site.
ManchuCandidate: “First, after the elections, a lot of conservatives felt dispirited and isolated and so we had a spate of Moron Meetups.”
They had one of those before the election too, in Minneapolis.
coashg: Respond with what? A Prius Vagina?
Anyone who’s ever been to Maine during winter would appreciate as much rock salt as they can get.