Related video

About the author

Juli Weiner was Wonkette's beloved intern and books columnist and then morning editor until she was hired away by Vanity Fair in 2010.

View all articles by Juli Weiner

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

81 comments

  1. TGY

    Somebody tell Steele that ‘beta’ isn’t urban for ‘better’. Doesn’t work that way. Coincidentally, the next release after ‘beta’ *is* actually ‘mo beta’.

  2. mookworthjwilson

    [re=434143]steverino247[/re]: I seriously doubt she is a repupblican. Her eyes aren’t cold or dead enough.

  3. norbizness

    “Flip the Script: A Michael Steele Joint (Not that we’re for the legalization of narcotics)”

  4. queeraselvis v 2.0

    Those lists of accomplishments are hilarious, given that the vast majority of them basically reiterate the same message: No, seriously, Republicans don’t really really really hate women, blacks, and other minorities. Really. For real.

  5. PlanetWingnuta

    I doubt she’s a republican too…i haven’t seen her face during the Teabaggers events nor on the teevee during the national conventions…maybe she’s Michael’s Niece…”hey honey do your uncle a favor and I’ll get you that car you want”

  6. Zadig

    [re=434154]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: All it really demonstrates is “Hey, the Republicans used to be the Democrats, and vice versa!”

  7. Terry

    Behind the scenes at the GOP, the white Southerners are plotting like heck as to how to dump Steele without seeming like even bigger racists than they already appear. Or conversely, they could be letting him distract us with superficial things while they get on with the hard core business of trying to ruin the country to the benefit of the political donors and the super rich.

  8. HandsomePete

    Oh, we no longer have a miniature Michael Steele greeting/dancing for us on the home page anymore. Damn!

  9. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=434163]4tehlulz[/re]: Yeah or Getty Images–the same place where they get those neat photos for wallets & picture frames. Uh oh, I just gave Michael Steele an idea.

  10. stew

    I heard they booked Vanilla Ice for their upcoming youth rally…until they found out he was both white and homeless.

  11. queeraselvis v 2.0

    [re=434158]Zadig[/re]: My personal favorite: Republicans WIPED OUT THE KLAN but the Democrats BROUGHT IT BACK. Thus, Democrats hate teh blacks 4Evar.

  12. PlanetWingnuta

    by the way anyone gone to the “why are you a republican” part of the site…i’m way tempted to go and write “Why am I Republican: In what other party can I: 1)Cheat on my wife with people of different genders. 2) Take bribes from insurance companies…I mean campagin contributions. 3)Say No the interests of my constituents so they’ll die early but as long as I can have their vote today. 4)Say abstentince is the way to go, but have my daughter get preggnant out of wedlock and parade her on the national stage. 5)Blast the Democrats for adultery and other moral failings and when I get caught say it’s time for forgiveness and its time move on. 6) But say that Homosexuals are the real threat to traditional marriage, meanwhile I’m ‘Hiking the Appalachian Trail’ with my very best friend and leaving my 4 sons without daddy on Father’s Day. 7)And hey there’s that great C house…and we know what the C means! Rhymes with Bunt, Wink wink nudge nudge.”

  13. digibal235

    1. The GOP faces should be more representative, i.e., Klan members, Timothy McVeigh, etc.

    2. This wouldn’t work with the Democrats, you can’t substitute a black person for the “N” in DNC.

  14. bricks

    Hey, what the fuck? They took away all the hip hop, and went and smoothed it all out on the R&B tip!

    This is some bullshit!

    What a sellout you are, Michael Steele. You disgust me.

  15. teebob2000

    [re=434169]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]: It’s not even a website.

    Upon refreshing the homepage 10 times, only ONEST did it come up with a white male starring as the “O”. Is this what the Republican party is coming to? The party of teh coloreds and womans??? Lemme out!!!

  16. teebob2000

    …and shouldn’t his “whaaaazup??” first blog post be mroe properly called, “Lemme aks y’all sum’in” ?

  17. Aflac Shrugged

    Hold on, GOP.com. This woman is not (a) a general; (b) a professional athlete; (c) Michael Steele. I feel certain a by-law’s being violated here.

  18. TubeCity

    That young woman is smiling because she is so happy when rich people can still benefit from the Bush tax cuts. The happiness, it trickles!

  19. P Drizzle

    [re=434185]couchbound[/re]: Oh but there are so many:

    Yo Uncle Harry, tickle my (truck)nutz!

    and of course there’s Sen. Clay Davis (aka fake-Charlie Rangel):

    Nazi Pelosi wants to hype the public option? Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit.

  20. hobospacejunkie

    [re=434176]stew[/re]: And that “youth rally” sounded vaguely East German-ish. And because Vanilla Ice wouldn’t change his nom de jiggy to Vanilla Supremacy Ice.

  21. totoro

    DNC should retaliate with an image of an unshaven white man in an confederate-flag trucker hat and skoal-bulged cheek leaning out of a pick-up truck window, to spit. This would roughly cancel out Steele’s latest web-inanity.

  22. digibal235

    Fingers crossed! Apparently you can upload your own picture for the GOP faces beta… or (hopefully) not your own picture, and 128 generous characters on why you’re a Republican. I already used Tim McVeigh, DIBS.

  23. catsquatch

    [re=434205]V572625694[/re]: One of Jampf’s disciples. I spent more years than I would care to recall examining CS-US relationships.

  24. poopsmith

    Has anyone noticed the “Accomplishments” picture of Howard University? Its a modern day picture (with a late model car in the foreground) that they turned black and white to fit in with the others.

    I’m not sure they pay their interns enough for this.

  25. comicbookguy

    So the GOP plan is…

    1) Alienate all but the old southern white folks
    2) Reinvent themselves as a young hip-hop urban party
    3) Profit!

  26. Zadig

    [re=434178]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: What are they citing for that? Grant? Grant stayed sober just long enough to sign that law, not to actually enforce it.

    [re=434167]Terry[/re]: I don’t think they’re worried about looking racist for firing Steele. I mean, thirty seconds of video should be enough to justify that to anyone, Steele’s dog included. What they’re really worried about is that if they fire him, for being dumb, everyone might notice how cynically racist it was to hire Steele in the first place.

    All the bitching that racist conservatives do all the time about affirmative action, and the VERY REAL THREAT that an underqualified black man might be hired somewhere, ANYWHERE, based on the color of his skin? They are looking back at the chairman elections and realizing that is precisely what they did. Don’t want to alienate the base!

  27. teebob2000

    [re=434221]digibal235[/re]: OK, I’ll take Eric Rudolph. That should go over great, since we all know how the Republicans really HATE HATE HATE the US socialistic “one-happy-world” Olympics idea.

  28. S.Luggo

    [re=434156]PlanetWingnuta[/re]: She was at the DC Teabagger event, serving lemonade and minding the chilluns.

    I have seen her face on a box of pancake mix, also.

  29. EggplantParm

    From the “Who we are” page: “For a long time Republicans have been known as the “G.O.P.” with party faithful believing it meant the “Grand Old Party.” But apparently the original meaning (in 1875) was “gallant old party.” When automobiles were invented it also came to mean, “get out and push.” That’s still a pretty good slogan for Republicans who depend every campaign year on the hard work of hundreds of thousands of everyday volunteers to get out and vote and push people to support the causes of the Republican Party.”

  30. user-of-owls

    [re=434262]Terry[/re]: No lie. Just last year, the winning number in Howard’s annual step-dance competition was “Stompin’ to the Right: A Tribute to Barry Goldwater.”

  31. Bucky Katt

    What’s ironic about the list of “Republican accomplishments,” which is mainly from the 1800s, is that it tries to make it look that, deep down in their heart of hearts, Republicans are really Democrats. I mean, can you imagine the current Republican Party creating Yellowstone National Park? Or for that matter, enacting the 15th Amendment?

  32. PlanetWingnuta

    i wanna know why no one has put a KKK member with a hood in that 0 place…im serious…get on that shitz :)

  33. HopeyDope

    Did anyone notice how they have the “minority” folks posted more than once on the “Why I’m a Republican” page? Sheila’s little thumbnail pic showed up in three different places.

  34. Zadig

    Do they honestly think they can fool people into thinking that what the Republican Party is and does hasn’t changed radically in the last century (give or take a decade)?

    Come on, Republicans, don’t even PRETEND that you want to claim Lincoln as your own. I mean, even if we ignore the whole “not being a dick to black people” thing, Lincoln firmly established the dominion of the federal government over the state, which I am pretty sure that you guys are still mad about. And Roosevelt? He interfered in the free, unfettered action of the SACRED MARKET, you guys. Dammit, stop acting like these are men you actually look up to.

    In the impossible event that Teddy Roosevelt or Abraham Lincoln rose from the dead, and the even more unlikely that the shambling undead presidents actually WANTED to join the Republican Party, they would be promptly drummed out as hippy-dippy pansy socialist fascist liberals. They would lose the Republican Primary to literally anyone, including post-Watergate Richard Nixon and Mitt Romney.

Comments are closed.