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WONKETTE ART REVIEW

JON MCNAUGHTON WOULD LIKE TO ADDRESS HIS CRITICS: The mastermind behind the greatest painting ever, Jon McNaughton, would like to go on the record: “Some of the chatter going around on these liberal blog sites I feel is unfounded.” Also: “Why Satan? I don’t for a second believe he looks like that, but I do believe he is real.” [Jon McNaughton Art]


4:02 PM on Mon October 12 2009
By Jim Newell
2839 Views

  1. Holy Cow!! says at 4:08 pm, October 12th, 2009

    People who fear that an invisible being is out to get them and the only thing protecting them from said invisible being is another invisible being should not be permitted to paint.

    Nor should they be permitted to hold public office.

  2. teebob2000 says at 4:09 pm, October 12th, 2009

    >>”I don’t for a second believe he looks like that”

    So he’s LYING???!!!11 Bastard!!

    Hey, did someone send him teh alternate version? That’ll fry his brain.

  3. ForTheTurnstiles says at 4:09 pm, October 12th, 2009

    McNaughton is defending that unscientific Charles Darwin fellow? Evilution and all that? And that Papist JFK? Some American he is!

  4. AnnieGetYourFun says at 4:10 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “I am not painting an anthropological Jesus. Nobody would recognize him if I painted him that way.”

    First, don’t you mean “Him”? Second, doesn’t that bother you? Just a little? I mean, that the symbol of a man that you and your ilk worship as God incarnate has to be represented by something that is so completely different from how he actually appeared that you have to paint him a symbol? A white, Anglo-Saxon symbol who happens to look a good deal like someone I recently saw in a gay porn flick?

  5. BobTheBuilder says at 4:10 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Yea verily, he is real and by the name Wonkette shall ye know him.

  6. TimeCubist says at 4:10 pm, October 12th, 2009

    That’s a pretty sternly worded rebuke there, Jon.

  7. Mr. Dick Sprinkles says at 4:11 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “anthropological” = the new “Black”

  8. ChernobylSoup v2 says at 4:11 pm, October 12th, 2009

    All that fucking effort we put in last week and all we get is “unfounded”? How about blasphemous, insulting, unworthy? Shit, I’d take a simple juvenile. But sir, please do not ever insult our efforts here at Wonkette as merely “unfounded”. Thank you.

  9. takes12no1 says at 4:13 pm, October 12th, 2009

    ha. I see he has slipped a description in there about the Business Woman and thought we wouldn’t notice.

  10. AnnieGetYourFun says at 4:13 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Eh, I’m starting to feel a little bad for him. He’s probably a nice guy. A nice guy with a ham fisted sense of metaphor.

  11. V572625694 says at 4:15 pm, October 12th, 2009

    McNaughton’s got his little essay locked in so you can’t clipboard it. Everyone would be well-advised to go read his point 6 immediately, for the hilarity. The others are highly amusing as well.

  12. DoktorZoom says at 4:16 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “I simply wanted to spark discussion about these issues. But some of the discussion I sparked seems to suggest I am an idiot. This is not fair!”

  13. charlesdegoal says at 4:17 pm, October 12th, 2009

    I don’t either believe I evolved from an ape. My mom, perhaps, but I think I was born a human.

  14. comicbookguy says at 4:18 pm, October 12th, 2009

    There’s not enough minorities in his rebuttal.

  15. SayItWithWookies says at 4:18 pm, October 12th, 2009

    I believe that I did not evolve from an ape.

    So you’re not human? Mr. McNaughton, please don’t make me regret being a vegetarian.

  16. PabaBritannica says at 4:20 pm, October 12th, 2009

    And lo, He said unto them, “there shall be two houses of the Congress, and lo, the first shall be populated due to proportional representation based on the population of the states, and the other shall grant thine states 2 representatives each. And therein shalt be a speaker of the House, and it shall be called Newt for all time. But following the fall of man, the Usurper Pelosi stole the crown and reigned overeth His house in sin for a generation”

  17. AnnieGetYourFun: not me. i hope he’s on fire. there’s too many McNahgaughtons with too much McTime on their hands for me to feel safe outside. Really?? Get your fun and come back over here.

  18. DoktorZoom says at 4:22 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “Sorry I offended some of you by spelling Thomas Payne’s name wrong. I see no reason to actually change it to “Paine” in the alt.text or even in my apology, because maybe if you all harp on that, you won’t notice the greater illogic of the painting as a whole. Oh, you noticed anyway? Jesus loves you!”

  19. Way Cool Larry says at 4:23 pm, October 12th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: Yeah, his points are fairly reasonable, and I was almost starting to feel sorry for him too. Then I noticed the title of his site is “McNaughton Fine Art”.

    It’s “fine art” only if you are a connoisseur of American Cheese, and can espouse at length on the subtle difference in texture and flavor between Velveeta and Kraft.

  20. Tommmcatt says at 4:24 pm, October 12th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun:

    So much to love here, like:

    “This is what the constitution is about: limiting the size of Government”

    or

    “I knew when I painted this picture that Thomas Jefferson and Thomas Payne were deists. That was irrelevant to me.”

    But my favorite is the implied threat in:

    “One of the things I said to myself from the beginning was the kneejerk reaction people would have to the painting would be very revealing as to which side they personally stood in the picture”.

    In other words, Wonkette goats, you’re going to hell.

    What a nasty piece of work- by which I mean the overly sentimental and glurgy painting, the dishonest, self-serving commentary that accompanies it, and the painter which foisted it unto an unsuspecting public.

  21. shadowMark says at 4:24 pm, October 12th, 2009

    ChernobylSoup v2: I suspect people who paint in oils hear a lot of voices in their head. Voices telling them to ditch oils and use acrylics. Voices telling them to stop painting and get a Wacom tablet and Photoshop. Voices telling them to get into animation. Voices telling them to get into video. By the time they get around to answering the stuff we say they are all tired out from talking to themselves.

  22. plus a white kid in a yellow garananimals shirt pointing out whatever in god’s constitution. twitter it, junior. jesus barfed.

  23. ifthethunderdontgetya" says at 4:27 pm, October 12th, 2009

    V572625694: Point 2 had me laffing. “We are now at a time when these liberties are at peril”.

    That’s right, a preznit who said it’s not illegal if I do it, yes I can spy on yur asses, and even send you off to get tortured with no trial or even legal representation? Jebus is down with that.

    A wimpy public option to the health insurance cartel? SATAN IS ENSLAVING US!
    ~

  24. RoscoePColtraine says at 4:27 pm, October 12th, 2009

    First of all, thank you, Mr. Who’s-It for using my favortie phrase of all time, “we will just have to agree to disagree.” You have no idea how much I love that, and how it’s used by folks who’ve been backed into a corner (logically speaking,) and absence of demonstrable facts to back them up.

    And #2, I hadn’t realized you went to the trouble to tell us the time on the supreme court justice’s invisible watch. I somehow missed that detail on my first viewing of the masterpiece. That’s just plain thoughtful. And retarded.

    Please keep up the awesome job your doing. We tease those we love here at Wonkette.

  25. x111e7thst says at 4:28 pm, October 12th, 2009

    FuckTard wants me to agree to disagree. Screw that. He’s wrong I’m right. What a guano faucet.

  26. shadowMark says at 4:29 pm, October 12th, 2009

    V572625694: If you want to grab his text and copy it, go to the site and choose “view source” from your browser menu. His comments are just an html list toward the bottom. Of course, I’m not encouraging anyone to do anything bad. But if you want to grab his text to do something bad, just grab it from the source screen of your browser.

  27. Tommmcatt: tanks…i was unclear which nasty piece of work. and why i hated it so. glurgy also.

    >>What a nasty piece of work- by which I mean the overly sentimental and glurgy painting, the dishonest, self-serving commentary that accompanies it, and the painter which foisted it unto an unsuspecting public.

  28. PrairiePossum says at 4:30 pm, October 12th, 2009

    McNaughton’s picture has no happy trees. Bob Ross is crying sad painted tears in his grave.

  29. AnnieGetYourFun says at 4:31 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Tommmcatt: I agree with the glurge. Not sure about the nasty. Frankly, I just think he’s kind of dumb, really. Not bad, just… dumb.

    Eh, sorry, maybe it’s just my vagina talking, but sometimes when we pick on people like this, I start to feel a tad sorry for them. Not so with Nooningtonshire.

  30. Scoops McGee says at 4:32 pm, October 12th, 2009

    I’ll bet that Jesus would like that fine art painting that he would want Mr. McNaughton to give away copies of it for free. McNaughton could probably throw in, at no cost, some of that “cabin-in-a-snowy-woods” crap he’s trying to sell, too.

  31. He’s right. Satan looks much more like Condi Rice…gap tooth and all

  32. Oldskool says at 4:34 pm, October 12th, 2009

    I may have missed it but what’s with the guy in front having a breakdown? Cause he looks exactly like me when I accidently flip over to Fox. We may have a peeping Jon on our hands here.

  33. Constantine says at 4:35 pm, October 12th, 2009

    I feel that any further mockery of this guy is no different than showing your dog a stick and then pretending to throw it and watching the dog enthusiastically trying to fetch something that isn’t there. It’s fun to watch, but you’re taking advantage of someone who doesn’t know any better for your own amusement.

    The guy isn’t really that bright with the intellectual maturity of a petulant teen, and I just feel guilty about further beating up on the guy.

  34. Scoops McGee says at 4:36 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Little typo on my part. It should have read: “I’ll bet that Jesus would like that fine art painting so much that he….”

    I just get so excited about fine art that I forget myself sometimes.

  35. Crank Tango says at 4:36 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Holy Cow!!: shit, when you put it that way, that is exactly the kind of person I want making art! Political statements, not so much. Legislation, hell no.

  36. Clancy_Pants says at 4:37 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “hard-core pornography” is hard to define, but that “I know it when I see it.”

    Potter Stuart - Jacobellis v. Ohio

  37. It’s times like, viewing a painting like this, that I ask myself, “What would Jesus do?” And all I can come up with is “roll His eyes and sigh deeply”.

  38. Accordion-o-rama says at 4:37 pm, October 12th, 2009
  39. Flanders says at 4:38 pm, October 12th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: You and me both, I suppose…I even began to feel some sympathy for skoalrebel. On the other hand, glurgy is my new favorite word.

  40. At the end of the day, the message comes down to this: A bunch of slave-owning, stone-cold athiest aristocrats were inspired by god to write a constitution, which discusses religion primarily in terms of blocking its role in government—a then-unprecedented feat of athiest audacity. And then a bunch of other things happened, fulfilling god’s will to have laissez-faire capitalism, which is commanded by the bible. Jon, you are not making sense.

  41. Tommmcatt says at 4:39 pm, October 12th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun:

    I wouldn’t shed any tears for this guy- he wouldn’t shed any over you.

    Respectfully, I have to disagree. Revisionist history, and implying that people that don’t share your political ideas are going to hell for it may not be the nastiest things ever, but they are way up on the list.

  42. Accordion-o-rama says at 4:40 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Love point 5, that a soldier would be a good substitute for Dr. King. Because Dr. King was so well known for his support for the war in Vietnam?

  43. NopantsMcGee says at 4:41 pm, October 12th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun:

    Yeah, me too. I mean, I don’t have a talking vagina and my Johnston isn’t speaking up write now, but I too feel a tad bit guilty when we make fun of a guy like this.

    I mean I still do and everything and I know that means I’ll end up in Hell. I just hope the Hell I’m sent to is the cool one. You know the Ironic Punishment Hell where I would be foced to stare at McNaughtons art for an eternity, and not the scary pitchforky one the baptists are always yapping about.

  44. comicbookguy says at 4:42 pm, October 12th, 2009

    So the King estate invoked their copyright to prevent him from putting MLK in that painting? Good for them. Send that estate an “iPhone”

  45. NopantsMcGee says at 4:44 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Accordion-o-rama: “anthropological Jesus”

    I laughed hard, Sir or Madam.

  46. Constantine: idk…if you let up on these christo-fascist clowncars for 1 minute, these are in your workplaces and schoolhouses and court-whatevers for a lifetime. I mean it’s better than telling me to give blood to someone i don’t even know…but blease.

  47. Gopherit says at 4:47 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “I don’t believe I have evolved from an ape.” On this, we agree Jon, because all but the most primitive primates could outwit you and your ilk.

  48. Accordion-o-rama says at 4:50 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Thanks for the insight, Jon. In keeping with your philosophy, I’d suggest a couple of changes to your Reagan, Bush, Lincoln and Nixon playing poker in Hell/Heaven/Limbo whatever. The table centerpiece show be the top half of Obama’s decapitated head, eyes staring straight ahead, preferably with a candle stuck through the top of the cranium. W. should be shown brandishing a whip over Ted Kennedy’s prostate, naked body, and Hillary, gagged and bound with netting, should be hanging upside down in the corner.

    Hope this helps,
    A-o-R

  49. AnnieGetYourFun says at 4:51 pm, October 12th, 2009

    NopantsMcGee: My idea of hell involves being trapped in an Apple store for eternity.

    Don’t get me wrong - I think this is complete schlock, and calling it “fine art” is pretty hilarious. And the explanations are disingenuous… “oh, Satan’s just over there by the lawyer/Hollywood/other Jews… just cold hangin’ out, no REASON he’s by them.” Mmm-hm.

    Also, Jesus was a socialist. So, suck it.

  50. You know, in a strange way, I feel sorry for McNaughton. Here he thought he was putting together a visual manifesto and all he’s getting if flack from both sides. It’s enough to make a guy go live in a rustic cabin in the woods of Montana.

  51. Extemporanus says at 4:52 pm, October 12th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: NopantsMcGee: Twat did you say?

    I cunt hear your talking vagina over the screaming of my raging hard on.

  52. RoscoePColtraine says at 4:53 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “I would like to take a minute to explain some of the points of confusion for those who wish to interpret my picture.”

    You meant for us to interpret something? There’s not much to interpret when the artist has so painstakingly described the names, representations, thoughts, motives, beliefs and time of day as shown on a tiny, barely visible wristwatch. It’s like we don’t have to come up with any interpretation at all, actually.

  53. As long as Jesus has blonde hair and blue eyes, this painting speeks the TROOTH

  54. glamourdammerung says at 4:58 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “One of the things I said to myself from the beginning was the kneejerk reaction people would have to the painting would be very revealing as to which side they personally stood in the picture”.

    And Christian doctrine is pretty explicit about what happens to folks that judge where others are going to end up. So he better make nice with us before we spend the afterlife passing him around like a peace pipe.

  55. Joshua Norton says at 5:03 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “McNaughton Fine Art”

    I don’t think “Fine Art” means what he thinks it does.

    Seriously.

  56. Accordion-o-rama says at 5:05 pm, October 12th, 2009

    One of the marks of great art is that it is open to a variety of interpretations.

  57. El Pinche says at 5:06 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Does his blog text have alt-text? What about us who can’t read whitey? I bet Thomas Kinkade can do it better .

  58. proudgrampa says at 5:07 pm, October 12th, 2009

    I wouldn’t feel sorry for him, Annie and Nopants. That ridiculous painting perpetuates the notion that Jesus is some sort of a White American Protestant. I get so tired of that. Of course, as a recovering Southern Baptist, I’m tired of lots of shit.

  59. martinette says at 5:08 pm, October 12th, 2009

    How convenient for Mr. McNaughton that Jesus endorses his political views and prejudices! I wouldn’t have thought the Savior would want to set us straight on matters of interstate commerce and eminent domain, but in this sofa-sized pack of lies, the Lord does just that.

    I’m guessing McNaughton thinks he gets a bye on blasphemy.

  60. queeraselvis v 2.0 says at 5:11 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Joshua Norton: It’s “Fine Art” the way Thomas Kinkaide is “Fine Art.” You know, one step up from Starving Artists Sofa-Sized Paintings. Just.

  61. RoscoePColtraine says at 5:12 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “I believe that I did not evolve from an ape. You may disagree, but that is how I feel.

    Another one of those agree to disagree points, eh, Mr. McNaughton? Too bad the fossil record and shared DNA (around 99.99999999%) between humans and apes has pretty much put the issue to rest. That’s how reality “feels.” Shit, why can’t the untalented artists just stick with painting bowls of fruit and landscapes?

    And c’mon, people…what’s with all this fucking sympathy? Guy’s a douchetard.

    [/Roscoe's bee-in-his-bonnet]

  62. Flanders says at 5:13 pm, October 12th, 2009

    glamourdammerung: I’m pretty certain that I stand on the lower-right part of the picture, as the Professor, representin’ the edgeuhmacated eleets.

  63. chascates says at 5:16 pm, October 12th, 2009

    A dinosaur would have really made the difference in this concept.

  64. cracksammich says at 5:25 pm, October 12th, 2009

    What’s Jesus doing with all those Unitarian Universalists?

  65. El Pinche says at 5:26 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Yeah, we know why McNaughton would never paint the anthropologically correct Jesus.
    Who’d ever want to buy a painting of a bearded, brown sun-dried shriveled up Jew? None of his customers , that’s fo sho .

  66. DangerousLiberal says at 5:28 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “Some stars shine brighter than others.” Yeah, see the dim bulb up there? That’s Oklahoma.

  67. Joshua Norton says at 5:34 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Ever notice that most of the untalented painters and song writers just throw the word “Christian” in front of their half-baked crap and the Fundies and Baptists will buy it by the truckload until their doublewides are jammed to the rafters with tacky dreck. Idolatry be damned.

  68. omg! literally.

  69. All obvious things aside, I read McNaughton’s Screed [good Michael Crighton book title?] a couple days ago, and his explanations are good. He defends himself calmly and won me over. He’s right about the MLKj image- they’d sue his ass- the family’s in court a we speak, suing the crap out of each other.

    As for the quality of the art, he lives in Provo, Utah. His great art rivals in town makes sock monkeys and refrigerator magnets.

  70. Scoops McGee: Jesus would not even pause, he’d just grab it and tear it up saying “Make no graven images!” in Greek. Yes, in Greek, not Aramaic.

    There is one major point I want cleared up. McNaughton is a Mormon. No Smith, no Young? You’ve got 100 people behind Jesus, why not the 2nd and 3rd most important people in history? Are they disguised as symbols or articles of clothing?

  71. So… Patrick Henry was used by God to… protest His own damned constitution? Is God feeling a little schizo today, or is this what’s meant by the Divine Trinity?

    Or maybe Patrick Henry is a symbol of… how it’s OK to hate on the constitution? Was Patrick Henry for the constitution before he was against it? Our Founding Flip-Flopper?

    Nay, “it’s all metaphors!” is your typical hand-waving defense used by internet users who have nothing else to fall back on. Dude was “divinely inspired” talk and paint about stuff he obviously didn’t know anything about and now he’s trying to BS his way out of it.

  72. Atheist Nun says at 6:18 pm, October 12th, 2009

    What? Don’t feel sorry for this panty liner. How is he going to revel in his Christian Persecution Complex™ like a shark ecstatically rolling in chum-filled waters if we don’t, like, persecute him? You know he wants it.

  73. SmutBoffin says at 6:23 pm, October 12th, 2009

    NYNYNY: Don’t underestimate the sublime, transcendent awe or frisson you can experience upon viewing a well-made sock monkey.

  74. Franklin Pierce & Pierce says at 6:40 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “If you believe in God, surely you believe in a Satan”.

    Ah, the difficulty of reconciling an “all-loving, omnipotent” God with the God who allows such horrors to happen in This World of His. At least in the Old Testament the Jews kept it real by having their God be cranky and brutal and bipolar. Shit went bad for you, Christian Soldier? Blame Satan!

    I do enjoy how he defends Satan’s inclusion (behind the Hollywood guy and College Professor) by noting that he is not saying these people are “Satanic”. No, of course not. That would be extreme. You’re just putting them in very close proximity together and having them be in agreement about everything.

  75. problemwithcaring says at 6:51 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “There are fifty states in the Union. Some stars shine brighter than other.”

    Look: some of you commenters are so fat and ugly and in your pajama pants that it makes Jesus cry. This is not meant to be nasty. This is WHAT I FEEL. WHAT!?

  76. user-of-owls says at 7:02 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Joshua Norton: Well, ya know, before you can have “found art,” ya gotta have someone who sez, “I’m gonna go out an’ Fine Art, dadgummit!”

  77. AngryAtheist says at 7:03 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Are fine art reproductions available on black velvet?

  78. Shortpacked says at 7:08 pm, October 12th, 2009

    KUTV in Salt Lake City has been doing news stories about this dude. They interviewed me about my dumb liberal hijacking for their second piece: http://connect2utah.com/content/news/story?cid=56081

    He’s right about my junior high humor!

  79. RoscoePColtraine says at 7:10 pm, October 12th, 2009

    I once knew a guy named “Art.” He had some ripped-off museum poster hanging in his apartment that said “Expose Yourself to Art.”

  80. BobTheBuilder says at 7:14 pm, October 12th, 2009

    If Lincoln were turned around facing the other way, it’d be pretty funny: he’d be feeling up Washington’s and Jesus’s nutsacks.

  81. knoxtheharpy says at 7:18 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Shortpacked: Well done, sir, with your “edgy” spoof that will scare all the Mormons.

  82. Keep in mind when reading McNaughton’s comments that he’s a Mormon - and Mormon theology differs significantly from standard Protestant/Catholic theology on several counts.

    They believe Jesus came to America and preached to the Indians long before Columbus hit the beach.

    They believe Lucifer and Jesus are brothers.

    They believe Jesus is the Gawd of _this_ planet, and his spiritual descendants have the potential to ascend to godhood themselves. Each guy becomes a god for his planet and gets to populate it with the offsprings of his multiple goddess wives.

    They don’t believe in evilution because they believe they’re the offspring of gods. They come from higher beings, not lower beings.

    These are the people who’ve been caught posthumously baptizing Holocaust victims and other dead persons in the name of their genealogical mania. Rumor has it that some of the LDS leadership have gone so far as to have themselves spiritually wed to deceased movie actresses, to ensure getting themselves a piece of that action in their afterlives.

    And one of their prophets is named Moroni. I shit you not.

  83. RoscoePColtraine says at 7:46 pm, October 12th, 2009

    EelPout: And don’t forget the golden tablets. The ones where God has inscribed all these truths, and which are now inconveniently located in Heaven. We’re not supposed to be able to see them so God can test our willingness to suspend common sense and reason faith.

  84. Jukesgrrl says at 8:04 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Provo? Well, that explains everything.

  85. Robert Zimmerframe says at 8:13 pm, October 12th, 2009

    EelPout: Yet like Amway, people still join.

  86. mookworthjwilson says at 8:22 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Way Cool Larry: See what little you know…Velveeta is a cheese product blend, made by Kraft…

  87. El Pinche says at 8:30 pm, October 12th, 2009

    EelPout: LDC hates it when you simplify Mormonism using toons:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7q6brMrFw0E

  88. Altarkation says at 8:38 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “I believe that this book (The Origin of Species) is a standard the left uses to push christianity out of the educational form”

    Did I miss the memo? I thought we atheistical socialists used the Bill of Rights to push christianity out of the schools…

  89. All hail great Cthulu! May you be eaten first. (oh yeah also Master Race Jesus, and such)

  90. bakeneko says at 9:13 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Save the page as “Save as web page, complete”, then open the html file in a text edtor, and delete the following line:

    This disables his disabling of your ability to copy/paste/save from his document.

    If you care, of course…

  91. bakeneko says at 9:16 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Well, fuggit, it’s probably a good feature that it won’t let me past in javascript… Just search for “disable_right_click.js” and delete the entire line.

  92. bakeneko says at 9:16 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Well, fuggit, it’s probably a good feature that it won’t let me paste in javascript… Just search for “disable_right_click.js” and delete the entire line.

  93. GreatOldOnesParty says at 9:45 pm, October 12th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: what with the “ditch all yer crap and join my gang!” stuff.

  94. Robert Zimmerframe says at 9:47 pm, October 12th, 2009

    bakeneko: McNaughton really should have used “disable_left_cliques.js”.

  95. PoignancySelz says at 10:10 pm, October 12th, 2009

    We had a good laugh at this guy’s expense pre and post Shortpacker. And not, necessarily, because we are mean-spirited, exclusionary psychopaths. The reason it was funny is because he is a simpleton and his painting was dreck. You’re right Roscoe, why didn’t he put the Golden Tablets or some crap like that in it? How about some dancing cats?
    Or if he had any balls, how about an image of Moe Hamed?
    Schmaltz and stupidity are easy pickings for this crowd.

  96. Dashboard_Buddha says at 10:31 pm, October 12th, 2009

    V572625694: Here ya go…

    Mcnaughton-art-logo
    One Nation Under God
    CLICK HERE for more information
    Call: 800.799.6933 or 801.369.9552
    Art_details_navbar_all_links
    One_nation_under_god
    McNaughton’s response to liberal criticisms of “One Nation Under God.”

    I would like to take a minute to explain some of the points of confusion for those who wish to interpret my picture.

    1. Each figure including Christ represents a symbol. Everything about the painting is symbolic. I don’t pretend to know what Christ looks like. As I stated in my interview, I wanted to create an image that would instantly be recognizable as Jesus. I am not painting an anthropological Jesus. Nobody would recognize him if I painted him that way.
    2. The figures in the background have been the source of great debate. Let me make myself clear from my writing that just because they stand behind Christ, does not mean they are devout Christians evoking all to come unto Jesus and be baptized?! What I am saying is that they represent those who have influenced our country and our Constitution in a positive way. Many of these men and women gave their lives so we could have the liberties we enjoy. We are now at a time when these liberties are in peril. Our government has grown so big and powerful that the rights of the individual are at risk. This is what the Constitution was about—to limit the size of government. The patriotic heroes who stand behind Christ and the Constitution are pleading with us to defend the cause of liberty. Except for the pregnant woman in the lower left corner, these people symbolize those who have pushed our country towards Socialism. (The pregnant woman’s place in the painting is explained on the website.)
    3. In connection to my last statement, I knew when I painted this picture that Thomas Payne (so sorry I offended some of you for spelling his name wrong), and Thomas Jefferson were Deists. That was irrelevant to me. I believe God brings about His purposes through different people. Even those who aren’t baptized or following the accepted Christian religion.
    4. Not only have I received flack for this painting from Liberals, but also from the Right as well. Why did you include JFK? Why Lincoln? Why Teddy Roosevelt? I painted this picture to reflect my personal feelings about America. This is not a Republican painting. This is not anything other than one artist’s personal feelings about his love for Christ, this country and a desire to make a point about where we are headed. I hoped that this painting would encourage dialogue and debate. It is important that you understand my position before you make assumptions.
    5. One of the most ridiculous criticisms I have read is that I don’t have enough minorities in the painting. The way people throw around the word “racist” these days is overkill. From the beginning of the painting I chose to include a variety for ethnicities under the “Strong Americans” category. I also used different races in the background where I could. One of the most important positions in the painting is where the black U. S. soldier is standing. Originally, I had Martin Luther King Jr. here. He was so important for his leadership in the Civil Rights Movement. I removed him because of copyright issues with the King Foundation. Although disappointed, I thought a good substitute would be the soldier.
    6. Some of the chatter going around on these liberal blog sites I feel is unfounded. One of the things I said to myself from the beginning was the knee jerk reaction some people would have to the painting would be very revealing as to which side they personally stood in the picture. If you don’t believe the Constitution was inspired of God, fine. We will agree to disagree.
    7. Some so called “art experts” feel that a true painting should not be explained, but left to the viewer to interpret. I may not reveal all my thoughts, but I want the world to know what I think and feel—that’s why I painted it! Great art causes one to feel. To feel deeply. I knew this painting would evoke emotion on both sides. I knew it was a unique concept, having never been painted before. I don’t care if the composition is outdated or whether some other artist may have painted their composition better than me. The message stands alone.
    8. Why Satan? I don’t for a second believe he looks like that, but I do believe he is real. Again, the image is symbolic. Having Satan near these people doesn’t mean that they are Satanic. If you believe in God, surely you would believe in a Satan.
    9. OK, how could McNaughton be so ignorant about Charles Darwin and “Origin of the Species?” Yes, I have read the book and yes I do believe in many of the theories it espouses. What?! No, I don’t’ think the book should be burned and kicked out of the school curriculum. Some of the rebuttals I have heard in regard to this subject in my painting are unfounded. I believe that this book is a standard that the left uses to push Christianity out of the Educational Forum. I believe that we need faith in our schools. I believe that I did not evolve from an ape. You may disagree, but that is how I feel. Do I believe Evolution should be taught? Yes. Should Christian thought or any other religion be allowed to be discussed without reservation? Yes, as long as it doesn’t infringe on the rights of others.

    This is my personal witness and testimony as to the state of this nation. If you would like to ask more questions about my painting, I invite you to do so. I would be pleased to answer any honest questions regarding, “One Nation Under God.”

    http://www.mcnaughtonart.com

    Close Window

    One_nation_under_god
    Move the cursor over the people or items in the painting to view more details.

  97. Dashboard_Buddha says at 10:34 pm, October 12th, 2009

    shadowMark: Or you can just press ctrl-a then ctrl-c (don’t know what the Mac secret handshake is).

  98. Darkness says at 10:35 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “Great art causes one to feel”

    Dude, ALL art causes one to feel. And if all the figures are symbolic and intended to be instantly recognizable, I’d call it a cartoon. American Art has moved far beyond a large, colorful political cartoon.

    And yeah, teaching religion in school would be great. Let’s just be sure to cover them all, right. Let’s go in order by date, starting with Paganism in all it’s variety… or perhaps by sheer numbers of followers. Hinduism and Islam really need to be covered more, I totally agree. Starting the day with a nice Wiccan prayer over the loud speaker will really get the kids ready for the day.

  99. Dashboard_Buddha says at 10:36 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Oldskool: You wear a robe when you watch tv?

  100. GreatOldOnesParty says at 10:36 pm, October 12th, 2009

    PoignancySelz: I mean, come on, he’s very inspirational! Amirite?

    Repost obligatory Blingage.

    http://blingee.com/blingee/view/100168196-One-Nation-Under-God-?offset=3&owner=czn939

  101. GreatOldOnesParty says at 10:37 pm, October 12th, 2009
  102. GreatOldOnesParty says at 10:40 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “Some stars shine brighter than others.”

    He ACTUALLY wrote that?
    I thought that was Shortpacked’s doing.

  103. Bassweasel says at 10:48 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Shortpacked:

    D

    Shortpacked rules, and so do you!

    Best satire of the maudlin since you blew “For better Or For Worse” out of the water.

    Regards

  104. Darkness says at 10:48 pm, October 12th, 2009

    McNoughton, Dude, come a little closer for a chat… The problem you have here is by playing it safe with your cardboard symbols you create nothing more than a giant cartoon. You need to reach inside yourself for a representation that is greater than, yet still reflective of, the whole of those you have previously experienced. You want Satan? Reach inside to the sinister corners of your bad dreams and paint a damn Satan, already. Stop being so damn careful. By being pablum-level careful you stifle all aspects of Art and open yourself up to greater political criticism of any art aspects that may have survived and are trying to claw out of the canvas. Breathe life into them instead. You are your only audience. If you worry so much about every moron understanding every last thing in the painting, then you create nothing more than a graphic artist montage. It’s not art. And it’s certainly not great, except perhaps by measure of the dimensions of the canvas. Let the paint breathe, Dude! It wants to be alive!

  105. Dashboard_Buddha says at 10:54 pm, October 12th, 2009

    EelPout: Jesus and Satan are brothers? Like Avatar,and Blackwolf?

  106. Bassweasel says at 11:00 pm, October 12th, 2009

    “Should Christian thought or any other religion be allowed to be discussed without reservation? Yes, as long as it doesn’t infringe on the rights of others”.

    Any other religion? If a teacher discussed Islam in Provo, UT “without reservation” in a positive manner what sort of teabagger lynch mob would materialize?

  107. Flanders says at 11:15 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Shortpacked: “edgy” - I liked that description. yeah, “edgy” is EXACTLY what I was thinking as I admired your handiwork.

  108. Flanders says at 11:21 pm, October 12th, 2009

    Flanders: After seeing that interview, fuck him after all. Asshole. No more vagina-induced sentimentality for that Mormon prick. shortpacked, I *still* have treats for you, though. I like your style.

  109. Darkness says at 11:30 pm, October 12th, 2009

    GreatOldOnesParty: Yes, and I suspect the fewer teeth, the lower the literacy rate, and the higher the ag subsidies, the brighter the shine.

  110. rottenart says at 11:33 pm, October 12th, 2009
  111. Darkness: Yo- don’t know if you strolled through his website. Dude is making a living with this stuff. You ever read the Fountainhead? He is Peter, this is that scene where you, Howard, try to communicate with him. P.S. I know, I know, I know.

  112. AddHomonym says at 12:37 am, October 13th, 2009

    RoscoePColtraine: Indeed. This artist clearly is a member of the traffic sign school of art. There is NO LEFT TURN and he will not YIELD in his effort to STOP socialism.

  113. hobospacejunkie says at 2:19 am, October 13th, 2009

    Ha ha, I love this McNaughton idiot because he inspires the most amusing & creative attacks upon his “art” and deficient, judgemental character.

    Clowncar, dreck, glurgy and all the other excellent slurs visited upon his person — thank you all, and thank you McN for inspiring this delicious animosity. I love what shortpacked did with it, and am still blown away by the “Bow Down Before Cthulu” version.

    If glurgy-brained vermin like McN can inspire Wonkettland to such dizzy heights then by all means pleez have Jeezus & his big brother Lucifer send more like him our way. This is too much fun not to do on a regular basis.

  114. Jiminy Glick says at 2:43 am, October 13th, 2009

    “Each figure represents a symbol”? What the fuck does that even *mean*?

    The painting’s name is called “One Nation, Under God”. The painting’s name really is “Scott Stapp Graduates From Law School”. The painting is called “Take That, King Estate”. The painting really is a big turd.

  115. notwavingbutdrowning says at 3:46 am, October 13th, 2009

    EelPout: And their God lives on a planet named Kolob or Kabob or something. Among the many dirty secrets of the Mormons is the fact that they don’t worship the same God or Jesus and they have a separate Book of Mormon that they use instead of the Bible. Then there is stuff with the golden plates and the seer stone and mystical spectacles… Basically Joseph Smith was completely batshit crazy. But because of Mitt Romney everybody has to pretend that the Mormons are just another Christian sect. But they have more in common with Scientology than with Christianity.

    Jiminy Glick: re “symbol” : You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. Also “Scott Stapp Graduates From Law School” - ha.

  116. First of all, Jon, it isn’t a painting, it’s a propaganda poster for full mega-church attendance.

    “May the collection plates be overflowing with loads of guilt-removing dollars, praise be to the lord Ja-hee-sus!”

    No coins, please.

  117. keglined says at 7:56 am, October 13th, 2009

    New game: how many mistakes can you find in the “artist’s” commentary?

    - “this represents the liberal lefts control”
    - “seperationist”
    - “the most important book written of why America is so great…”
    - Benjamin Rush was a “Signor of the Declaration of Independence”
    (Benjamin Rush was an Italian???)
    - “Thomas Payne”
    - Being on top of the steps - *bad” when it’s a “smug” Darwinist
    - Being on top of the steps - *good* when it’s a kid wiping his booger on the Constitution
    - Did you know James Madison is often referred to as “The Bill of Rights”? Yep!

    I got eight!

  118. Barry White Zombie says at 8:51 am, October 13th, 2009

    notwavingbutdrowning: I have to take issue of your characterization of Joseph Smith as “completely batshit crazy.” He had already been convicted of fraud, and he knew exactly what he was doing.

  119. Elephants Gerald says at 12:45 pm, October 14th, 2009

    Way Cool Larry: Velveeta has no equivalent.

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