metro section

Have You Signed Your ‘Real World’ STD Waiver Yet? Oh, You Simply Must

  • Before you appear on a reality tee-vee program, make sure to read the STD clause in your release very carefully. Very very carefully. Because MTV will not fix your genitals if you dry-hump a love sack and then contract the crotch rot. Contractually, MTV is simply not responsible. It’s in your contract, understand? Good. Now sign here please. [Washington Examiner]
  • Please stop randomly shooting your glock or desert eagle or blunderbuss or whatever. You are lowering the property value in Petworth! [Prince of Petworth]
  • Re: big black cocks. If you hang around Union Station, they will come. [Holla Back DC]
  • Anna Karenina meets Woyzeck meets generic detective novel meets the Washington Redskins. Basically the saddest thing you will ever read, ever. [Washington Examiner]
  • The SDS (aka “75 high schoolers who skipped gym class”) marched around McPherson Square in celebration of Barack Obama’s Peace Prize. [DCist]

About the author

Riley is an "internet blogger." He has written for such internet websites as True/Slant and the terrible Brangelina gossip emporium "The Huffington Post." Riley lives in northeast DC, near H Street. Maybe you do too and want to hang out?

View all articles by Riley Waggaman

Comments

Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here with a few helpful links to ease your transition to Disqus - Claiming Old Accounts - Claiming Your ID Comments - Turning off Disqus Notifications. And, as always, remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • Mahousu

    Was that crotch rot or couch rot?

    Because of the love sacks, you see. A furniture joke. Ha ha.

    I wonder if Dancing with the Stars uses the same contract? And is The Hammer now finding this out to his regret?

  • zhubajie

    What if you get crabs from another reality show person? That’s part of reality, isn’t it?