THE LEGISLATIVE BRANCH  11:01 am October 9, 2009

Olympia Snowe Is SO LUCKY That Alan Grayson Did Not Have Time To Go To Kinko’s

by Juli Weiner

Alan Grayson! Yes! Who even is this guy, and yet, ALAN GRAYSON. Watch Alan Grayson carry on for like four minutes about how much he hates Olympia Snowe and her whole stupid state. He’s like, “Maine? Hardly!” Seriously, he basically says this.

Fuck you, Olympia Snowe:

“I want to remind us all that Olympia Snowe was not elected President last year. Olympia Snowe has no veto power in the Senate. Olympia Snowe represents a state with one half of one percent of America’s population.”

Listen, for serious, all Alan Grayson wants is health care for America. He doesn’t care if this bill gets zero votes in the Senate, he just does not give a shit, so long as this does interfere with his benevolent goal of health care:

“America doesn’t care if it gets 51 votes in the Senate or 60 votes in the Senate or 83 votes in the Senate. In fact, America doesn’t even care about that, it doesn’t care about that at all. [...] But America does care about health care. If you’re against it, then get out of the way. Just get out of the way.”

So… Alan Grayson might not understand what “Senate” is, is the point.

[Huffington Post]

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Way Cool Larry October 9, 2009 at 11:05 am

so shrill and strident!

hobospacejunkie October 9, 2009 at 11:06 am

Grayson/Weiner 2012!

Seek October 9, 2009 at 11:09 am

However, I’ll take Grayson in the betting for the Thunderdome death match with Olympia. I’m pretty sure he can take her, even with her Senate Street Cred.

groove October 9, 2009 at 11:09 am

Haha, what a whiny baby.

Way Cool Larry October 9, 2009 at 11:10 am

David Broder just fainted

freakishlystrong October 9, 2009 at 11:10 am

He dresses gaudy and has fucked up hair-I’d hit that.

Way Cool Larry October 9, 2009 at 11:10 am

mmmm, bacon…

Potater October 9, 2009 at 11:13 am

Jesus fuck, Grayson/Grayson ’12, ’16, ’20, ’24, ‘ever

Mr Blifil October 9, 2009 at 11:15 am

She may represent a small segment of the population (leaving aside the anti-demographic rationale upon which he idea of The Senate is based), but she represents a relatively large segment of Senators With Innies Not Outies.

memzilla October 9, 2009 at 11:15 am

Who else besides me wants to see Alan Grayson go on Faux News and verbally a**-fuck Hannity, Limpbaugh, Malkin, Coultface et al. with his Barbed-Wire Bastinado of Truth?

Watchreader October 9, 2009 at 11:15 am

::clears throat::
Actually kinkos hasn’t been around since 2004. They were bought by FedEx.

ManchuCandidate October 9, 2009 at 11:16 am

Are you sure this guy’s a demoncrap?

Despite it all, dude’s got a point.

freakishlystrong October 9, 2009 at 11:17 am

[re=430633]memzilla[/re]: ‘twould love it, sadly, ’twill never happen.

ioksotot23 October 9, 2009 at 11:22 am

Olympia Snowe is now readying her sleigh and boxes and boxes of turkish delight, if that fails she’ll turn him to stone, straight up.

Voyou Charmant October 9, 2009 at 11:27 am

He has good hair and fabulous fashion sense.

Terry October 9, 2009 at 11:28 am


No, Snowe is from tough Yankee stock and routinely survives Maine winters. Grayson survives palmetto bugs and retired senior citizens. I think Snowe has the edge.

TGY October 9, 2009 at 11:30 am

“I want you to go to your windows, throw them open, and yell I’M MAD AS HELL ABOUT THE OPPOSITION TO HEALTH-CARE REFORM AND I’M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!”

canadians for pussy October 9, 2009 at 11:31 am

dont forget he is from florida, americas wang.

Thumbcuff October 9, 2009 at 11:32 am

Common sense. Not the Glenn Beck kind. The other kind. This guy has no hope of a career in US politics, even if he does make me want to move to Ocala, wherever the fk that is,

thefrontpage October 9, 2009 at 11:33 am


Good for him! He’s a new hero! He should keep it up!

Good for Alan Grayson!

Norbert October 9, 2009 at 11:33 am


[re=430647]ioksotot23[/re]: awesome

Sweet Baby Cheeses October 9, 2009 at 11:39 am

[re=430632]Mr Blifil[/re]: The SWINO Caucus?

V572625694 October 9, 2009 at 11:40 am

The Ice Goddess will not be amused by this fellow, who obviously, like Nancy Pelosi, doesn’t know his place. It’s the lower house — a bottom, basically.

Seek October 9, 2009 at 11:43 am

[re=430658]Terry[/re]: Those Seniors can be mean as hell, but I get your point. This could be a pay-per-view opportunity for the ages.

Katydid October 9, 2009 at 11:48 am

[re=430666]canadians for pussy[/re]: Actually, Grayson was born in the Bronx. He learned how to be a bastard when he was a law clerk for Robert Bork and Antonin Scalia. Strange but true.

Vending Machine October 9, 2009 at 11:49 am

[re=430632]Mr Blifil[/re]: I thought Olympia Snowe had a belly with stars; or was she a Sneetch with no star upon hars? I forget which is the good one.

hockeymom October 9, 2009 at 11:55 am

He speaks the truth.
Americans do NOT care about 51 votes or 60 or 83.
They care about their health care.
More Alan Grayson, please…less Reid, Baucus, Conrad and Lincoln.

Gob October 9, 2009 at 11:56 am

Ha, Taibbi had a post about this guy a few weeks ago. He’s maybe my favorite congressman right now.

GideonGlib October 9, 2009 at 11:57 am

As a resident of “Americas Wang” I say forget Kendrick Meeks, lets put Grayson up against Marco Rubio (cuz’ we know it ain’t gonna be Crist after the primaries) for the senate seat being vacated by Martinez.

Roger Williams hates your ways October 9, 2009 at 12:02 pm

This guy is the fucking man. Make him the head of all things Democratic please. Head Democratic Ballbuster In Charge. Or something like that.

hockeymom October 9, 2009 at 12:10 pm

@Roger Williams: The Ballbuster Czar?

Crab1 October 9, 2009 at 12:18 pm

Grayson makes a straight man wanna turn gay.

Thechansen October 9, 2009 at 12:27 pm

[re=430689]V572625694[/re]: Please he’s a POWER bottom.

JSDC007 October 9, 2009 at 12:33 pm

Olympia Snowe may be a douche, but right now she is a lovely ouzo-scented douche with notes of pine and salt-air who can make this healthcare thingy happen. We like pleasant scented douches.

We do not like nasty vinegary douches reeking of Santorum that come out of the acidic orifices of Mitch McConnell, John Kyl, and troll doll Chuck Grassley.

So there, Mr. Grayson.

MLHencken October 9, 2009 at 12:36 pm

Where did this ballsy Democrat come from. Aside from the ill-fitting jacket, he’s got my vote.

UnattendedConsequence October 9, 2009 at 12:41 pm

Well, I’ve sorta stood up for Snowe before, but here in Maine she’s getting all demagoggy on the “guv’mint gonna take over health care” bullshit, so she’s on her own. Frankly, it’s past time to stop pussyfootin’ around and start pokin’ people in the eye. And this Grayson dude seems up for it, so good on ya Al! Time to get medieval on their asses!

sati demise October 9, 2009 at 12:44 pm

Send this man some money asap. He also showed up on Wolfies show and kicked their asses. I mean stone cold ass kicker.

love him. love love love him.

MzNicky October 9, 2009 at 1:00 pm

Grayson was on some FauxNut screamfest a while back — I coulda swore I saw it here.

Anyway, I think this is it.

Neil Cavuto! What a wacky guy.

Rascalcat October 9, 2009 at 1:09 pm

Let me first preface this with the fact that I am a life-long, flaming hetrosexual, not that there is anything particularly right with that.


AJSOL October 9, 2009 at 1:18 pm

Why shouldn’t Grayson be allowed to assfuck all these rightwingtards on pay-per-view? It would be one hell of a show and a great way to “fill them ol’ coffers” as Bushtard43 used to say.

donner_froh October 9, 2009 at 1:18 pm

Damn. Even though it looks like he grabbed the wrong jacket while on the way to the House floor–looks like it was cut for someone about a foot tall and 80 lbs heavier–he is the best thing that has happened to the democrats since January 20, 2009.

Big things in store for him but for the rest of this term make him the chief whip for the house dems. Dude would get them in line real quick.

ttommyunger October 9, 2009 at 1:42 pm

Actually, he is not from the wangy part of Florida. he’s from Orlando area, which is more up near the ballsy, tainty part of the State. Looks like we have the same tailor, Goodwill…and the hair, the hair! To die for! I would certainly wear that exact “do”; if I still had hair. I want him to be the next “Kick the Rightard Fuckwings in the balls daily” czar.

desertwind October 9, 2009 at 1:43 pm

Well… we couldn’t have all the flaming rightwing nutz grabbin’ all the attention, could we?

ct03 October 9, 2009 at 2:03 pm

Way to reference Idiocracy on the floor.

limeminearia October 9, 2009 at 2:27 pm

I missed the Idiocracy reference. What is it?

assistant/atlas October 9, 2009 at 2:28 pm

[re=430768]hockeymom[/re]: That’s supposed to be Rahm’s job. But fuck Rahm Emanuel. What the hell has that guy done lately? Alan Grayson for Chief of Ballbusting.

[re=430941]ttommyunger[/re]: Wait, isn’t this guy also rich as fuck? That begs two questions: why does he wear such shabby clothes and why would he live in Orlando?

finallyhappy October 9, 2009 at 2:39 pm

[re=431059]assistant/atlas[/re]: He is very rich but maybe it is good to be folksy where he lives. The only people who I know in Orlando are Mickey and Minnie.

Inadequate Blackmail October 9, 2009 at 2:41 pm

America America America. Blah blah blah.

Where’s Mitt Romney when you need him to tell us what Ronald Reagan would say? That’s the important thing.

Carrie_Okie October 9, 2009 at 2:52 pm

Olympia Snowe = Vice President of the United States of Whatevoh

sezme October 9, 2009 at 3:27 pm

Alan Grayson represents a state that single-handedly fucked up democracy in the year 2000.

Anyway, why is America Ferrera more important than Olympia Snowe, just because she has a hit show?

Pajama Ram October 9, 2009 at 3:29 pm

Holy Sacagawea! The guy’s doing a great job, considering he was stained by the likes of Bork and Tony Scales. But he’s also got Palinitis:

Children: Skye, Star, Sage, Storm, Stone

Aurelio October 9, 2009 at 3:32 pm

I like him. He says everything three times.

sezme October 9, 2009 at 3:41 pm

[re=431139]Pajama Ram[/re]: Those names are in no way as tacky as Trick, Track, Trek, Truck, Trig, Oompa Loompa, and Frodo.

AlexisHidell October 9, 2009 at 4:00 pm

[re=431139]Pajama Ram[/re]: With kids named that, I expect he’d be a proponent of pot legalization. Go Grayson!

dementor October 9, 2009 at 4:04 pm

[re=431139]Pajama Ram[/re]: And I’ll be glad to bear Stick, Stopsign, Stalagtite, Schooner, Scofflaw and any other spawn he wants so long as he keeps up his Ivy League-level trash talking.

DP October 9, 2009 at 4:10 pm

[re=431145]Aurelio[/re]: Yes he does. Yes he does. Yes he does.

guerilla-nation October 9, 2009 at 4:39 pm

Why does some douchebag from Florida care about health care? Isn’t Florida where everyone goes to just die? (That’s certainly what Rudy Giuliani did in 2008). Florida is America’s Hospice. No one there needs health care. Now nationalized pre-paid funeral insurance … that’s a different story.

soontobeseniorciitzen October 9, 2009 at 8:46 pm

Way to Alan Grayson!! We need more plain talking out spoken representatives in congress.
My only regret is that I don’t live in your district so I can’t vote for you. Your common sense is like a breath of fresh air in the stuffy halls of the capital building.

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