Glenn Beck Is Asked To Retract His Endorsement Of Mr. Pippin’s Fantastic Rectum Scratcher
by Riley Waggaman 4:58 pm October 5, 2009
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“To be clear, I root for America, therefore I root against Barack Obama.” Finally! The RedState dogma explained in one convenient sentence. [RedState]
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Everything that Glenn Beck says hates him. [Think Progress]
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Karl Rove acknowledges that he has reoccurring wet dreams about Marco Rubio, and that if he could, he would dip Marco in chocolate and then gobble him up. [TPM]
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Here is a truly shocking video of Andrew Sullivan sipping Merlot and smelling tulips whilst lounging in his finest Brooks Brothers cashmere sport coat and blabbering on about how much he loves the Queen. And he accuses Barack Obama of being a Tory? Good heavens. [The Daily Dish]
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It is true that Michelle Malkin is a bit of a “surfboard.” But now we have even more proof that Michelle is actually just Matt Taibbi in drag. [Michelle Malkin]
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{ 36 comments }
I was worried for a second that the “shocking video” was of Andrew Sullivan’s little 12-hour petit mort from earlier. Just the thought of the possibility of that makes me shudder.
That Red State post was the most ignorant thing I’ve ever read on that site. Which says a lot.
God I hate it when I get sucked into clicking on a Michele Malkin link and it’s not a snuff film.
That Andrew Sullivan movie something about Britain and the Queen starts with a commercial for Porsche a German car company that makes cars that seem too small for having sex in.
Is it wrong to feel slightly turned on when Michelle’s face goes a kooky and that one eye starts to drift?
Yes. Yes it is.
[re=427174]Crank Tango[/re]: She do go on. And on. And on…
She’s more of a gravestone. Smooth and cold and signifying dead things.
My Bo(eh)ner
RIP 10-5-2009
Thanks to fuckface Jim “Fuckface” Newell’s Sexposé re: Andrew “Shamu” Sullivan’s 12 hour chili dog cookoff.
Never forget, never remember.
From Redstate…
“Chicago is a violent scum infested city almost devoid of decent Americans. I kind of wish they did get the games so we could keep hitting Obama over them and show the rest of the country what a sewer he spawned out of.
Conservatives, by definition, cannot hate America. Liberals and ALL Democrats, by definition, HAVE TO HATE AMERICA.”
He must be talking about the other Chicago.
Btw Riley, these entries are all a tad bit homoerotic. Have you been “bumpin’ fuglies” with Andrew “Beef Syrup” Sullivan for the past 12 hrs or so? And if so BRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAFFFFFF
[re=427184]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: There’s a Chicago in Kenya?
Sullivan’s got such a boner for the Conservative Party leader, David Cameron. Pretty natch really, since Cameron went to Eton and obviously likes Buttsecks with older/hairier dudes.
Does ANYBODY read all the way through one of Malkin’s
postscut-and-pastes? Jesus Christ on a cracker.Wait — if Michelle Malkin is Matt Taibbi in drag then is Ann Coulter really John Derbyshire in drag?
[re=427184]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Reminds one of the “objectively, all whites are racists” or “objectively, all cops are pigs” or “it’s impossible for a Black person to be a racist”
argumentsbullshit of the good old days.Calling Malkin a “surfboard” (or waterboard?) is just as bad as referring to Meg McCabe as “fun size”. However, calling her Taibbi in drag is hilarious.
Riley, why are you troll-pimping (or whatever the cool kids call it) Michelle Malkin’s site? I go there hoping to see someone standing on her back in the surf till she drowns, and what do I get instead? Reams of bla-bla-stimulus-told-ya-so. If she promised you licky-for-clicky, I have to tell you, she lies.
Also, I dunno if Muse really got ahold of Beck to make him retract his endorsement of them, but whoever did is a fucking rock star. Either way I like them more now.
[re=427204]grevillea[/re]: Malkin? Licky? That’s ill-advised. She has battery acid for saliva.
pigs root
I’m bummed at the new design on Malkin’s blog. I really miss her photo … used to click over there now and then just to remind myself what death’s head really looked like. But now, it’s all design-y. Very elegant, too elegant for spew.
“To be clear, I root for America, therefore I root against Barack Obama.”
Oh, right — Erickson was only cheering the part of Chicago not getting the 2016 games that was bad for Obama, not the other part that was bad for America. How obtuse of me not to recognize that earlier.
[re=427184]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: I loved the commenter’s name: Red_Dawn. If you could somehow harnass all the ignorance among the Redstate commenters, you could light a medium-sized American city for a week.
When Adrew gushes about the Queen, is he looking in a mirror?
Glenn must be flummoxed as to just exactly where to apply the rectum scratcher, considering that he is such a complete asshole.
HOLD THE PRESSES: Apparently Glenn Beck was lying about a representative contacting him and just assumed that they hated him, so went ahead and made up a big Whoopi-Goldberg-on-Amtrak scandal about the whole thing?
Sounds like Muse paid Glenn to say they told him to retract the statement, Bruce Springsteen style, but actually, nah, they kinda like Glenn. Or something. Riley?
[re=427280]ithasatilde[/re]: well that’s no surprise. It didn’t make sense that he could say something and then within a few minutes get an email from their rep. But I kinda doubt that there is anyone on earth that doesn’t suck that actually DOES like Glenn Beck and want his endorsement.
Although now he has me wondering about these stupid NWO references and crap. It’s bad enough I have to hate a shitload of actors because they are scientologists…
Muse are certainly prone to the conspiracy theory edge of politics, but they’re leftish wingnuts rather than Teabaggers. Their new single, “United States of Eurasia”, is pretty much a call for Europe and Russia to join forces to pwn uncle Sam.
“To be clear, I root for America, therefore I root against Barack Obama.”
So although I rooted against Obama lobbying for the Olympics I was actually rooting for his lobbying for the Olympics because if Chicago were to get the Olympics it would be an economic boon to America and in particular employment of many many thousands of Americans in and around Chicago who currently can’t find work.
My brain just broke.
[re=427313]doloras[/re]: Also, their lead singer is a Truther, so fuck them. Obama needs to fire them from the music czar-ship.
42 seconds,
Whoa the same exact time as SkoalRebel’s rendition of Smoke on the Water
[re=427184]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: He might be speaking of Northwestern Hospital’s Mental Health Center (i.e., the wacko ward.) There, to break you out of delusional fanatasies, you are shown video-tapes of the Illinois legislature or I.U. football games.
Roland Martin is a moron? That’s really not what they wanted to say, however, that’s all they really COULD say.
Karl Rove dips everything in chocolate. He has a fondue pot the size of a cement mixer. At the height of his power he turned a cub scout troop into a human box of raisinets. Mr. Rubio should be very afraid.
Oh, silly Wonkette. Tulips? Hardly. Campanula persicifolia or, possibly, Campanula latifolia, but definitely not tulips, goofy kids.
Shouldn’t someone tell Glenn Beck that, here in reality, we can’t see the splendorous fantasies that play out daily in his hollow little noggin.
“On September 19, 2008, I declared the death of fiscal conservatism”
-M M
Soo, you HAVE been stoned on crystal meth and cheap beer for the last 20 years, along with the FOX faithful?
Is that why you missed previous opportunities to report this tiny little seismic shift?
Does this admission mean the end of the late night threesomes with Sean Hannity and Willy Kristol?
Will MM lose her exalted spot on FOX ‘news’?
Nah. Fox won’t report it.
If FOX doesn’t report it, it NEVER HAPPENED.
God bless.
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