Twas only Monday when we even first met the Liz Monster, Dick Cheney’s spawn-object, and her feared Internet chimera KeepAmericaSafe.com. Well, now it is Wednesday and the Liz Monster must defend herself against a formidable enemy force composed of actual former generals in the US Army who will fight the Liz Monster until she glissades back into the mountains of Hell and stops frightening Earth’s creatures. Really.
It turns out it bothers the Army when civilians (even zombie ones!!) go around publicly lying about military procedures.
About a dozen retired generals and admirals, trying to add momentum to President Barack Obama’s effort to close the Guantanamo Bay military prison, are accusing former Vice President Dick Cheney and his daughter Liz of scaremongering about the dangers of closing it.
“It’s up to all of us to say these arguments advanced by Cheney and his acolytes are nonsense and that really what they’re doing is undermining our national security by delaying the date at which Guantanamo is closed,” retired Brig. Gen. James Cullen. [...]
“Some of the fear issues that are being raised in this are really unfortunate. It gets people excited about things they shouldn’t be excited about and impedes doing what is critical to this country. Get that damn symbol off the table,” said retired Gen. David Maddox, a former Army commander-in-chief for Europe. “We take a setback every time somebody, whether it’s the vice president or his daughter comes out and says the things that they say….We have to get out there again and just keep pounding.”
Apply thine heart unto instruction, and thine ears to the words of knowledge, for tomorrow we shall open Book Three: THE BATTLE OF MIDDLEBROW, in which the Liz Monster hypnotizes the Internet people, whom she makes sign up for keepamericasafe.blogspot.com… in blood.
[POLITICO]
{ 30 comments }
The Battle of Middlebrow is not my favorite track on Zeppelin’s fourth album, but it is high quality Tolkeiny cheese, which I do like.
Wow, who knew that a dozen generals and admirals could dislike their country so much?
Liz Cheney’s nose requires a crane to point upward. May it drop off sometime soon.
Is she the lesbian?
Get thee behind me, Cheytan!
[re=423022]gurukalehuru[/re]: She’s the prolific breeder. Five spawn at last count.
Does Liz even know she is simply a host body for when her patriarch’s current host finally gives and it is forced to attach itself to the base of someone else’s skull?
Gey that damn symbol off the table! Huh?
ZOMG I WANT MY CUNTRY BACK NOOBAMA HAS REPLACED THE MILITARY GENERLZ WITH GODDMAN PRISSY PRISS PRISSPRISSYMEN IN CHIFFON GOWNS STAND AND RECITE THE PLEDGE OF ALLERGIENCE
[re=423018]Deacon Frank Orris[/re]: Excellent! Thanks for the laugh so early in the A.M.
You know, the guitar solo at minute 23 of the Battle of Middlebrow holds up even to this day, or so said SkoalRebel in his latest video screed.
Now that even Real Americans hate Liz Cheney, can we blame her for everything, like the fact that Pavement tickets set me back a hundred bucks?
These goddam generals and admirals have been suckling at the government teat on our tax dollars for too long — we want a private option.
@the problem child: Five spawn? Oh jesus, we’ll never be rid of this warmongering clan. Her husband must have some kind of horrible pansy-sounding last name. Liz using Cheney as her surname makes her sound unmarried & unmarryable. If only that were so.
[re=423019]Terry[/re]: Everyone knows that real ‘merkins get deferments. Generals and admirals just don’t have the right priorities.
Military Intelligence is no longer an oxymoron?
Then there are the conservatives who seem to relish a military dictatorship.
http://thinkprogress.org/2009/09/30/miltary-coup-newsmax/
[re=423035]hunter.blatherer[/re]:
Or the weren’t smart enough to get the deferments.
[re=423033]Norbert[/re]: We tried the private option, at the time it was called Blackwater. What with one thing and another and a bunch of dead civilians that did not work out very well.
Surrender-monkey generals.
[re=423034]hobospacejunkie[/re]: Married to “lawyer Phillip Perry” according to the NYT. Kind of douchy, but could be worse. Liz Perry doesn’t sound awful, just kind of bland, middle-America.
[re=423040]x111e7thst[/re]: I’m sure Liz Cheney will back me up on this, but if it weren’t for Blackwater, you’d be speaking Farsi right now, mister.
“the US Army who will fight the Liz Monster until she glissades back into the mountains of hell and stops frightening Earth’s creatures. Really.”
Is this one of those Oh Shit posts where you editors THINK you’re being really sarcastic and then two weeks later have to write a snarky entry about some republican talking head who’s saying this in seriousness?
We need to keep Guantanaramamo open because if we close it then the terrists will win forever. Also, Liz Cheney uses it as an Arab stud farm.
WUT D0 TH353 S00RENDR MUNKEEZ KN0W AB0UT TEH M1L1TAREEZ THAY RETIRD CUZ THER QU1TTRZ
No, we need Guantanamo — how are we going to push the rest of the world around unless they believe we’re evil, terrifying and stupid? Maybe we can get everyone to watch WWE.
Why hasn’t Liz joined the service to kill terrorists for Jebus? I guess she has “other priorities” like daddy did back when he had his opportunity to kill commies for Christ.
[re=423022]gurukalehuru[/re]: Mary’s the lesbian. And she had some high falutin’ job at Time Warner.
Mmm, “glissade.” Love that word.
Liz monster should know better. The internet is for porn.
liz? its name is PAZUZU!
“Glissade”. God, I love this place. And, Julie. Also.
[re=423028]dum librul[/re]: I was thinking of that the other day. How many bodies you think Cheney’s been through?
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