• February 16, 2012

Asshole Stands Near Ice ThingThe notoriously frivolous Fairbanks Daily News-Miner appears to have been caught Making Fun Of Trig, and the managing editor has written an epic apology: “Today I must apologize to Mrs. Palin personally and on behalf of the Fairbanks Daily News-Miner for the choice of words used on the bottom of Wednesday’s front page regarding her speaking engagement in Hong Kong this week to a group of global investors. We used offensive language — ‘A broad in Asia’ — above a small photograph of the former governor to direct readers inside the newspaper to a full story of her Hong Kong appearance.”

Oh, if only newspaper editors were forced to apologize every time they used terrible, first-thing-that-pops-in-your-head puns in captions and headlines… then we’d have no newspapers!

But yeah, it’s always better to call Sarah Palin an “asshole” in these situations, avoiding all of that gender crap. “An asshole in Asia” would be a Pulitzer-worthy caption, “Check Out This Dumb Asshole” a Pulitzer-worthy headline, etc.

An apology to Sarah Palin [Daily News-Minder]

{ 88 comments }

shadowMark September 24, 2009 at 2:15 pm

A Tramp ABroad?

ManchuCandidate September 24, 2009 at 2:15 pm

I think that they meant “Dumb as a board in Asia”

slappypaddy September 24, 2009 at 2:16 pm

shit, the one time a paper tells the unvarnished truth and it has to apologize. what’s the whirled coming to?

El Kabong September 24, 2009 at 2:17 pm

they needed a picture of her speaking with the youngs. then it could have been “Palin and youth in asia”

dougbob September 24, 2009 at 2:17 pm

How About “Sarah’s Muck Lucks It Out in Hong Kong”?

ericstoltz September 24, 2009 at 2:18 pm

OK, what’s hilarious about this is that newspaper apologies and corrections NEVER repeat the mistake in the correction. So for the editor to repeat the insult in the apology is a fancy journalistic way of apologizing without really apologizing. Nice to see some dead tree types still have some cojones.

Extemporanus September 24, 2009 at 2:18 pm

My headline was: “Visiting Foreign Cunt Tries”.

Do I need to apologize now, too?

Chain Tattoo September 24, 2009 at 2:19 pm

Look at Sarah! She’s decked out in her day-glo Fuchsia Inuit finery!

As the ancient Native American proverb has it, “Inuit today, Dirty Sanchez tonight.”

AbstinenceOnly Ed September 24, 2009 at 2:19 pm

Calling her a “broad” is generous. I would go with Devilcunt, Hellbitch, Demon-dam, Grendel’s mum, etc. She should be thanking the Turd Miner for a flattering depiction.

teebob2000 September 24, 2009 at 2:20 pm

That is so fucking funny! The apology is an epic fail, though. The Palinistas will still use it to martyr her.

geminisunmars September 24, 2009 at 2:21 pm

Can we get her to just stay abroad? I mean a broad. No, wait I mean. . .

PabaBritannica September 24, 2009 at 2:21 pm

Sarah leaves Todd to go searching for Hong Kong Dong

user-of-owls September 24, 2009 at 2:21 pm

They should have gone with “The Yellow Man’s Burden”

Crank Tango September 24, 2009 at 2:21 pm

how about “Sarah Delights with new Pacific Rim Job”?

Extemporanus September 24, 2009 at 2:21 pm

[re=418640]Extemporanus[/re]: I apologize for the open bold tag. But the comment stands.

WIDTAP September 24, 2009 at 2:24 pm

Possible headlines:
“Dim view in Hong Kong”

I Am Not Your Gary Busey September 24, 2009 at 2:25 pm

“Hillbilly Grifter Takes the Show on the Road.”
“Sarah Palin (R-Wasilla) on Hearing That the Asians are Good With Math Heads to China to Learn Trig.”
“Crouching Snowbilly, Hidden Graft.”

TGY September 24, 2009 at 2:26 pm

Nah, we must respect Sarah Palin’s womanity. Even totally retarded, running-lights-on-but-nobody-at-the-helm, one-brick-short-of-a-load shit-for-brains deserve this courtesy.

norbizness September 24, 2009 at 2:26 pm

“Hey, That Bitch Who Quit Us Is Doin’ Shit”

Bypartizoa September 24, 2009 at 2:26 pm

And when is she going to apologize for all the Klan members at her rallies during the election?

NYNYNY September 24, 2009 at 2:26 pm

“Asshole Fingered in Taint Probe” -Thats ones mine pulizzer

Gorillionaire September 24, 2009 at 2:27 pm

When she is President of America she will try to sue Jon Stewart every miserable day. Also.

Darkness September 24, 2009 at 2:27 pm

Palin’ around with Asians while a broad? I’m with Abstinence, calling her a broad is a compliment to her, and an insult to broads everywhere.

ChernobylSoup v2 September 24, 2009 at 2:28 pm

Dames can be so sensitive.

magic titty September 24, 2009 at 2:29 pm

“Bitch Trouble in Little China” is way klassy.

Clancy_Pants September 24, 2009 at 2:30 pm

How about “Ap-Palin’ Diplomate”

Sharkey September 24, 2009 at 2:31 pm

“The media, already held in low regard, need to be extremely wary of that meanness slopping over into their own work.”

Yeah, JIM.

ericstoltz September 24, 2009 at 2:33 pm

“Palin Takes Tripp to China.” Isn’t that one of her kids’ names? Oh, sorry, that’s Track. I forget, Trick, Treat, Trigg, Trap, Tramp, whatever.

Johnny Zhivago September 24, 2009 at 2:33 pm

Pork with lemon grass and lipstick?

c-sick September 24, 2009 at 2:33 pm

“Asshole Stands Near Ice Thing”….classic

Anonymous Office Zombie September 24, 2009 at 2:34 pm

Am I the only one still experiencing cognative dissonance over the right wing’s embracing of political correctness and feminism?

Click September 24, 2009 at 2:36 pm

Julie will now have to apologize to the good folks of Bareflanks, AK for calling their local paper ‘The News Minder.’ It’s Miner, dear, named for the proud people whom former governor Palin recently mocked for digging holes.

Crab1 September 24, 2009 at 2:36 pm

[re=418640]Extemporanus[/re]: perfect. you should get a genius grant for that.

queeraselvis v 2.0 September 24, 2009 at 2:38 pm

If Boyce would have ended with a tag, the apology would have been perfect.

graceless September 24, 2009 at 2:38 pm

How can a person without depth, get in so deep?

mephistopheles jefferson September 24, 2009 at 2:46 pm

[re=418644]AbstinenceOnly Ed[/re]: I vote ‘Grendel’s Mum.’ In fact, I think it should be Wonkette shorthand henceforth.

DustBowlBlues September 24, 2009 at 2:48 pm

Here’s a fun new contest idea: Who can be the first to think of how she will claim this was an offense to her look-I-didn’t-abort-this-retard prop baby?

chascates September 24, 2009 at 2:52 pm

The gloves are off, the heels are on, and the stupid Jesus Barbie holds a grudge like the Ayatollah.

SayItWithWookies September 24, 2009 at 2:52 pm

Yeah, that was offensive. And so outdated. What the hell was wrong with “Snowbilly Quitter Wallows at the Trough?”

Extemporanus September 24, 2009 at 2:54 pm

[re=418687]graceless[/re]: Confucius say: To shallow person, everything deep.

pub_option September 24, 2009 at 2:54 pm

She saw a restaurant sign advertising dim sum, and sued thinking they were ridiculing her mathematical abilities.

Extemporanus September 24, 2009 at 2:56 pm

[re=418691]DustBowlBlues[/re]: Something tells me Mongolia will be involved.

Lets Go Vertigo September 24, 2009 at 2:57 pm

Many years ago, Pia Zadora was set to play a gig at San Francisco’s Bimbo’s 360 Club in North Beach. It didn’t sell enough tickets and was deleted from the schedule.

The newspaper headline was “Pia Zadora: The Bimbo’s Show Cancelled.”

Extemporanus September 24, 2009 at 2:59 pm

[re=418676]Johnny Zhivago[/re]: Keep kung pao-ing that chicken!

S.Luggo September 24, 2009 at 3:01 pm

Asia Destroys Land Bridge

chascates September 24, 2009 at 3:04 pm

But she can get away with saying (in China):
Ronald Reagan, he was faced with an even worse recession, and he showed us how to get out of here.

Yes, he tripled the national debt and was forced to raise taxes twice after he’d lowered them. It was said of the Bourbons of France that they remembered everything but learned nothing. Palin doesn’t remember anything and hasn’t learned anything.

NYNYNY September 24, 2009 at 3:04 pm

[re=418657]I Am Not Your Gary Busey[/re]: I asked Corn if you were him and he said no.

queeraselvis v 2.0 September 24, 2009 at 3:07 pm

[re=418686]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: Dammit, WordPress. Should have been [/sarcasm] tag.

McDuff September 24, 2009 at 3:15 pm

Making fun of Palin — what will the Troops say?

Why not have a picture with the caption “Former Governor Visits Hong Kong, Scores $300,000 for Speech, see page 3 for details” — factual, makes the meth-heads do a double take at “scores,” and reminds all why she quit her former day job.

thefrontpage September 24, 2009 at 3:16 pm

The promo headline should have read:

Asshole in Hong Kong causes more embarrassment for United States of America; State Department Urges Palin to Make an Illegal Visit to North Korea While She’s Over There

NopantsMcGee September 24, 2009 at 3:16 pm

“Serial Dumbass Travels Outside of Trailer Court” was their second choice.

I Am Not Your Gary Busey September 24, 2009 at 3:18 pm

[re=418719]NYNYNY[/re]: Nope, he’d be more clever. I’m merely inspired by Mr. Mo.

torera September 24, 2009 at 3:22 pm

I guess they really were trying to be mean then, because otherwise they would just have pointed out that it was a simple typo, inserting a space between A and broad because obviously the caption was intended to be Abroad in Asia. Trite but not mean. Surely Sarah is acquainted with those ol’ printer’s devils. (And right on, ericstoltz.)

nailsinthecoffin September 24, 2009 at 3:30 pm

Please, that headline wouldn’t even be the third choice for our own NY Daily News. I continually laugh at the headlines on every page of the paper.

stratonike September 24, 2009 at 3:31 pm

Well that is offensive. “A psychotic neocon” would have suited far better.

Edywin September 24, 2009 at 3:32 pm

Headline: World War Three Cancelled: China loses urge to dominate US after seeing example of Average Main Street American.

Crazybroad September 24, 2009 at 3:35 pm

Where’s MY apology, huh? I am seriously going to have to change my screen name now.

Lionel Hutz Esq. September 24, 2009 at 3:37 pm

They should have gone with Sarah Palin Sells Out to the Chinese.

And, think, if Obama’s first big speech was paid for by the Chinese, Orly Taitz, Glen Beck, Rush Limbaugh etc. etc. would never let us hear the last of it and how he was indebted to them until the end of time.

gurukalehuru September 24, 2009 at 3:42 pm

Shit, Bitch, Hillary has to put up with worse than that every damned day. You ain’t nothin’.

qwerty42 September 24, 2009 at 3:49 pm

I dunno … they don’t sound properly apologetic to me.

tiger September 24, 2009 at 4:01 pm

Shoot the twunt already. Was that too offensive?

Snarkalicious September 24, 2009 at 4:05 pm

[re=418650]Crank Tango[/re]: Salty and Breezy! Now with no MSG!

the problem child September 24, 2009 at 4:08 pm

[re=418807]tiger[/re]: No.

And your black box icon is kind of trippy on my monitor. I keep seeing dark brown things shifting around in it. Does this mean I need new glasses or a new monitor?

I’m sure there is something offensive in the above, and Megtard Stapletongue will let us know, post haste, with venom.

AbstinenceOnly Ed September 24, 2009 at 4:10 pm

[re=418788]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Only Palin could go to China, adopt a poor Chinese baby, name it Sprig, then bemoan how everyone makes fun of her poor little yellow baby and its chinky chinky eyes. This broad is a piece of work, I say.

Jukesgrrl September 24, 2009 at 4:13 pm

[re=418665]Gorillionaire[/re]: When she is President of America, I’m sure she’ll have the Supreme Court packed with sorority sisters — one from each of her nine colleges — so she may be ABLE to sue Jon Stewart. But imagine the fun when all the Justices are wearing tiaras, have sashes over their robes, and they put the opposing attorney in a soundproof booth while the other is making an argument.

Hedley Lamar September 24, 2009 at 4:21 pm

[re=418674]ericstoltz[/re]: I hear she took Trig once.

FreedomPoodle September 24, 2009 at 4:58 pm

The alt-text is very offensive for us Igloostanians who have the utmost respect for all Ice things, such as our Ice roads, Ice igloos, Ice creams and other Ice food as well as our Ice DogsSleighNutz.
Also, media should know by now that assholes are to be photographed inside Ice things, such as BIC (Broad Ice Cubes), and never outside BICs — to keep them fresh and mostly harmless.

Waiting for an apology!

grevillea September 24, 2009 at 5:16 pm

“Hong Kong Phooey: Round-eye Devil Cunt’s Word Chop Suey.”

Accordion-o-rama September 24, 2009 at 6:00 pm

Enough of the Yellow journalism.

rocktonsammy September 24, 2009 at 6:24 pm

” A broad with nice ass in Asia.”

Violenza September 24, 2009 at 7:07 pm

At this point she’s probably paying these liberal members of the media to denigrate her just a li’l so she can slime her way into another news cycle.

Bruno September 24, 2009 at 7:14 pm

So did the broad put out with the exotic foreignerz?

donner_froh September 24, 2009 at 7:25 pm

[re=418632]slappypaddy[/re]: There are some surviving newspapers, such as the Bloomington Pantagraph and the Sioux Falls Argus Record, that shouldn’t have to apologize for anything since they have silly names.

The Fairbanks Daily News-Miner is one of them. Daily News Minder is even better.

Buttery1000 September 24, 2009 at 7:28 pm

I saw Asians in a broad once.

President Beeblebrox September 24, 2009 at 7:36 pm

Nothing Get’s By Sarah.

comicbookguy September 24, 2009 at 8:03 pm

[re=418817]Jukesgrrl[/re]: Not only that she will have the entire White House Department of Law working on the case! Yooo betcha!

supremecourtjester September 24, 2009 at 9:22 pm

How about: “Yellow Journalism: Palin Comparison”?

Joe Spenard September 24, 2009 at 9:36 pm

Number 1 Chinese Chicken Word Salad

Joe Spenard September 24, 2009 at 9:39 pm

Here in Spenard we call it the Fairbanks Daily News Minus

Zorg September 25, 2009 at 12:15 am

If I was the mighty editor of this venerable paper, I would have gone with the more Twainian “In a Sense, a Broad.” At least, as the hed for the apology.

LowerdPeninsula September 25, 2009 at 1:53 am

“Retarded Redneck Addresses Intelligent Yellow-necks.”

“Why is Sarah in Hong Kong? Ancient Chinese Secret at 8!”

“Local crazy women breaches Chinese national security.”

Boojum September 25, 2009 at 6:37 am

[re=418674]ericstoltz[/re]: How about “Palin on Track”?

Boojum September 25, 2009 at 6:52 am

Oh Noes! Death Panels are back and this time they’re killing Trig! Talking Points Memo headline:

“Emanuel: The ‘Senate’s Been Clear’ On Option’s Prospects … Pelosi Dismisses Trigger”

Dolmance September 25, 2009 at 7:08 am

I hope Trig attended that dinner with Sarah that was recently raffled off, because it’s always best to have a vegetable with your meal.

Tundra Grifter September 25, 2009 at 11:45 am

Why didn’t they go with “Ding Dong in Hong Kong Sings Same Old Song?”

Click September 25, 2009 at 11:47 pm

[re=418682]Click[/re]: Make that Jim. Sorry Julie.

villageatrois September 27, 2009 at 6:20 am

Palin earns 250 kilograms of sudafed in Hong Kong speech fest

Levi and Todd race snow machines to greet plane

Twig is to branch as fingers are to computer

Palin hits snooze alarm repeatedly; burns to death in tanning bed.

Deacon Frank Orris September 28, 2009 at 1:54 pm

[re=418650]Crank Tango[/re]: WIN.

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