Wonkette
“LIKE MUSSOLINI”: THE MORE INTELLECTUAL ALTERNATIVE TO YOUR STANDARD HITLER SIMILE. Here’s another weirdly boring thing from the new Clinton oral history that also exposéd the fuck out of Boris Yeltsin getting drunk that one time. “Describing one interview in which Clinton was evaluating Gore’s campaigning during the 2000 election, Branch writes, ‘Gore lacked confidence in a light touch. Whenever he tried to be aggressive, said Clinton, Gore could come off ponderous and harsh, like Mussolini.’” OUTLANDISH! We will pre-order one million Kindles immédiatement. [Mother Jones]
Does Al Gore hate cats?
“Whistle while you work/ Hitler was a jerk/ Mussolini bit his weenie/ Now it doesn’t work,” sang Clinton.
I blame Naomi Wolf and all of those alpha male training sessions. The Future Rider of the Moon-Worm ended up like a lactating Pol Pot after that epic mindfuck.
Was Mussolini ‘ponderous and harsh?’ I always found him to be vaguely effeminate. He had an odd air of flamboyant arrogance, a kind of cross between Mick Jagger and an irritated Italian grandmother. Like, he can’t go no satisfaction until you eat’a you pasta.
Mussolini? Hell, I want to know more about the alleged girl-on-girl action between Hilz and the female vet.
I’d call that a pretty simplistic Al Gore-ithim.
AbstinenceOnly Ed: I hope you realize this is going to be stuck in my head the entire day, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
I’m sorry, did you say Clinton’s oral history?
I’ve seen Gore come a number of times before, and the act always struck me as being decidely more “inconvenient” than “ponderous and harsh”.
Clinton was right about the “light touch” problem, though. Dude has hands like two slabs of SPAM.
mephistopheles jefferson: That’s pretty much an accurate description of any Italian male. They loves them little horsies on their shirts.
queeraselvis v 2.0: no kidding. i wonder why it matters what her profession was.
Also, I am always down for a good wasted boris yeltsin story!
Clinton went on to declare that Gore’s running mate Joe Lieberman reminded him of the paranoiac depressive Joe Stalin, Hillary herself recalled the belligerent yet inscrutable Tojo, and that Tipper Gore had the qualities of none other than the spiteful, cynical Spanish dictator Francisco Franco. Hadassah Lieberman smacked of an appeasement-era Neville Chamberlain, and Ralph Nader played the role of a devious and amoral Pétain. Clinton saw himself as the jowly Churchill, a noble yet pragmatic bulldog who enjoyed the occasional cigar.
I paid pretty close attention during the campaign and don’t remember a single instance of Gore invading Ethiopia.
Let’s not forget Mussolini’s terse, 1943 State of the Italian Union address: “Things are not so bad, it’s-a nice-a place, ahhhhh shaddap you face.”
ChernobylSoup v2: It was easy to miss, late Friday afternoon newsdump.
ChernobylSoup v2: Nice!
Just because Mussolini once said he wanted to be Emperor of the Moon, now everybody wants in on the act.
Or did he say he wanted to be Emperor “before noon”? Those funny accents can throw you off a bit.
queeraselvis v 2.0: Is this lesbian politican scandal week? PLEASE, let it be so.
Clinton was such a dick, but what were we to do? We had run McGovern, Mondale, Dukakis, the worst thing that happened to the democrats was Carter actually getting elected, and so, there we were, republican presidents for 20 of the last 24 years, what the fuck could we do but embrace anyone who could get elected, even if he was just a fucking corporate tool anyway? Shit, seems we just did it again, sometimes.
Given Italys performance in WWII against any country more advanced than Ethopia, I would rather be compared to Hitler myself.
Prommie: I prefer to think of Clinton as the best Republican president we had since about Taft, if you disqualify Nixon on account of being a sociopath.
I cry bullshit. Mussolini didn’t invent the Intarwebs.
But Mussolini DID make the polar bears run on time.
Tell it Bill. Tell it. Truth is, while Bill was feedin’ Monica a wiener sandwich he was also fudge packin’ Al’s campaign.
Il Douche/Il Duce 2012!
AbstinenceOnly Ed: +1. Bravissimo!
glamourdammerung: Amen.
BTW, Clinton is, indeed, slick. Godwin’s Law was yearning to be fulfilled, and Clinton sidestepped it by pulling a double-socow-Mussolini. Bravo. **golf clap**