Wonkette
Poor-people-helping organization ACORN is the single most corrupt group in America, we know this. The Senate and House know this too. Why can’t they just be like a good organization, such as any bank or corporate law firm in the country, which are very respectable employers? ACORN, you may know, is headquartered in New Orleans, where there are many poor people, especially with the spikes in seasonal weather. And yesterday Governor Bobby Jindal made sure that they will have NO CONTRACTS with the state government, which they do not currently, but still, because of their corruption in humoring childish fake pimps in Baltimore.
No more non-money for you, ACORN:
Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal issued an executive order to keep any state money from going to the controversy-wracked Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now, which has its national headquarters in New Orleans.
According to the state’s Division of Administration, no state agencies have existing contracts with ACORN.
Of course it is important in this political stunt to make it appear as though there *were* existing contracts with ACORN, and the Republicans put an immediate end to this practice! Here, for example, is the headline from the Lousiana GOP’s press release: “Jindal Issues Order Ending Funding of ACORN.”
Governor Bobby Jindal has issued an executive order cutting off current and future state funding to ACORN following a series of incidents captured on videotape and the subpoena of documents from the group’s national headquarters in New Orleans by the state attorney general’s office.
The executive order states that, ‘ACORN’s actions make clear that financial involvement with ACORN is contrary to the public policy of the State of Louisiana and the best interests of its citizens.’
AND NO FAGS EITHER.
State, federal officials cut off money to ACORN [Times-Picayune]
Jindal Issues Order Ending Funding of ACORN [LA GOP]
via TPM
Give the Gov’nor a break. He’s an old white republican.
They weren’t keeping up with their exorcism quotas, obvs.
Just in case!
Jindal chalks up another successful exorcism.
Why should I trust him, what with his ACORN-colored skin? He’s going to have to Uncle Tom it up for a couple more decades before I let him in my country club.
What they are doing with acorns must be condemned… It is a devilly art and unreligious so I personally donot believe in it as the holy Korean forbid it and condemn it in the strongest manner.
I still can’t believe those idiots took a fugly 17-year old kid wearing a bunch of skinned chincillas over his shoulders seriously.
Le sigh. I’m sure Her Majesty Noonington hasn’t chimed in, but I really wish she would. She could sigh heavily and say ho, back when she was but a wee lass, it was considered bad taste to talk about the poor, and the people who helped them.
I insist on calling Jindal “Leetle Bobby Jindal”, in a southernese accent. It just feels right.
“…contrary to the public policy of the State of Louisiana…”
Translation: “nowhere near corrupt enough”
“The executive order states that, ‘ACORN’s actions make clear that financial involvement with ACORN is contrary to the public policy of the State of Louisiana and the best interests of its citizens.”
Yeah, and I guess it’s right in line with the public policy of the State of Louisiana to let 1800+ citizens drown in a hurricane.
I guess this means Sen. Vitter is going to have to stop going to his favorite Acorn brothels (now in 13 convenient Louisiana locations) since, technically, his money ($174K per year) is federal money.
You would think LA could use a good “whore tax”.
A Hindu, a Jew and an evangelical Christian were travelling together when they were overcome with fatigue. They stopped at a farmhouse and asked for lodging, but the farmer said he only had room for two. One of them would have to spend the night in the barn.
“I’ll go,” said the Hindu, and off he went. A few minutes later, there was a knock at the back door. There stood the Hindu, exclaiming, “There’s a cow in there, and cows are sacred in my religion. It would be impossible for me to sleep in the same room as a cow.”
The farmer then asked which of the other two would volunteer to sleep in the barn. “I’ll go,” said the Jew, and off he went. A few minutes later there was a knock at the back door. It was the Jew. “There’s a pig in that barn. It wouldn’t be kosher for me to sleep there. I cannot do it!”
“Oh, all right,” said the evangelical Christian. “I’ll go,” and off he went.
A few moments later there was a knock on the door. It was the pig and the cow, covered in semen, and bleeding profusely from their assholes.
If these boys get any higher on their highhorse they’s gonna need a parachute to dismount. They could just save everyone the righteous blather by issuing a press release saying “fuck poor people, we hope they die soon so banks & insurance companies can sell their organs on the black market.”
Also, when are the repubs gonna realize Jindal is a brown & cut him loose?
Extemporanus: Win.
Cut Bobby a break. He’s got demons to cast out and volcanoes to scoff at and can’t be bothered to remember where state money does and
does not go. Sheesh.
Later, the littlest governor’s office announced that henceforth, Louisiana would also cut all funding off to arsonists and serial-murder gangs. And schools.
Extemporanus: I laughed so hard I got ass-blood and semen all over my desk
Extemporanus: You are a Goddamned genius. I laughed until my anus bled.
Extemporanus: The Aristocrats!
Hey, I got really bad vision, are those two guys in the front giving the guy in the bach a hand job.
Bill Kristol’s daddy died.
Extemporanus: YO EXTEMPORANUS— I’ll let you finish, but Gandhi was one of the Hindus of all time.
What a coincidence. Why, just this morning, I decided to cut off all the funding I’ve never provided too!
But seriously, I’m surprised the Pimps Union Local #420 isn’t out there busting some of these scabs’ skulls.
Dens need to get better at manufactured outrage. It obviously gets a lot of mileage. Every dem governor should issue a press release condemning NASPAG’s (national association of sodomizers of pigs and grandpas) efforts to elect republicans. They use shady tactics, steal
government funds, and there’s the whole grandpa sodomizing thing. We will not allow these conservative NASPAGs to influence any more elections.
GuyClinch: Wow, you and I have such a delightfully similar sense of humour .
shortsshortsshorts: Gandhi was one of the Hindus of all time.
Why, did he sleep with hamburgers-to-be?
So, Jindal won’t be delivering any more huge cartoon checks with the US government x’d out as payor?
shortsshortsshorts: He’s back, and this time he’s mad!
There is only one law…HIS law!
SayItWithWookies: Jindal chalks up another successful date rape.
/fixed
Extemporanus: I can’t in good conscience take credit for the entire joke, though the semen and ass-blood are all mine.
Erm, that didn’t come out quite right…
ChernobylSoup v2: Dems. And
spellcheck can go fuck itself. I know what I am doing.
Limeylizzie: OMG we should TOTALLY meet! I’ll bring the wrestling mat, my buttplug case and a bushel of millet.
“Governor Bobby Jindal has issued an executive order cutting off current and future grotesque pandering. PSYCH!”
The good old boy on the right looks to be thinking “this faggy little brown pencil-neck is the who of what? Sheeet, where’s Ashton Kutcher? I gotta be gettin’ punk’d!”
Its probably for the best, as I’m sure governor Jindal was getting tired of handing out those giant stimulus checks that he opposed in photo ops.
Bobby Jindal is the M. Night Shyamalan of governors. No, not because he’s Indian or whatever, but because he keeps plumbing the depths of suck, with seemingly no self-awareness whatsoever.
user-of-owls: Later in life, Mahatmas K. slept with not one, but two attractive young women. When asked, he told the press that the purpose of the arrangement was to vanquish desire. I’m not really Hindu enough to understand all the mechanics of it, myself, but it sounds like a test that would be a lot more fun than the DMV’s.
Extemporanus: For the sake of our computer monitors getting spewed with just-drunk beverages, how about a fucking WARNING next time??!!!1
GuyClinch: You will recognize me , I will be wearing a gas mask, a large pheasant’s feather , some corks up my bum and a budgie…for the millet.
Extemporanus: You’re the best! And I’m a Christian! The Christian church harbors more dirty little secrets than can be counted. I say, “tell the truth and shame the devil.” It will be interesting to see just how far Leetle Bobby Jindal is willing to bend over. He’s on the right track to becoming a true blue-blooded Republican. Attack blacks and anything that might remotely assist black and poor communities, and be proud to do it. Formula for success as a Republican, put as many blacks in the meat grinder as you can. But where was Bobby Jindal and his family in the 60’s when “minorities” or people of color were banned from institutes of higher education, the right to vote and all the many benefits they so enjoy as an “American entitlement?” While my African-American ancestors were being billy-clubbed, attacked by dogs and water hoses. What price have you paid to enjoy your brown skinned entitlement, Leetle Bobby Jindal? The freedoms you enjoy as a person of color did not come without a great price. A price that you and your ancestors have not paid into in America. Thank the universe for Karma and the pendulum that eventually swings both ways. All our actions carry a price…
Cutting off current and future funding just shows how short-sighted Jindal has. He should be more of a visionary and cut off all past funding, too.
Bobby Jindal is a republican?
I don’t get it. “Bobby” Jindal admitted that he was conceived in a foreign country. His name isn’t really Bobby, but a foreign-sounding name. He did not grow up a Christian. Both of his parents are foreign nationals and neither one a Christian. How is he even considered for Republic anything?
Imagine what the wingnuts would be saying if this was Obama’s background.
June Cleaver 2.0: Well, for one thing, that would make them right about him being ineligible to serve as president.
So sad that we won’t have Bobby to kick around in a presidential campaign. Although it would make some sweet irony to have the very same birthers, just a few years later, rallying to pass a constitutional amendment to eliminate the “natural born citizen” rule.
Jeez what other non-existant thing can the republicans and baggers hype or take credit for next with the help of the MSM? Death panels, HC funding for abortions and illegals, hopey aint a citizen, there is no racism, glenn beck-hopey is a racist, czars, a president who wants to end torture and give more people healthcare is obviously hitler, etc.
BREAKING NEWS: Governors TPaw and Jindal in bold moves, extended both states snipe hunting seasons. The two also expressed outrage that the Obama administration is not doing enough to control the dragon population.
Oh, why couldn’t ACORN be a wingnut outfit and the whore/pimp videographers actually rapacious big-business types to make the sheeple look anywhere except at the man behind the curtain? And why isn’t Hopey’s magical unicorn-fairy semen-dust working anymore so that all that care to look see his gay-hating, chicago-gangster, extra-hyphenated presidency get phat on pharma and Afghanistan, pay those pay-backs with czars (especially chrysler dealers, ouch) and shut up the philistine non-believers with charges of racism or, if it comes to it, his very own Patriot Act? The Dimocrats have been flim-flammed by their own PINO, lick it baby, it’s only salty for little while…
Who else would like the see this twerpy goblin fuck thrown into a steel cage match with the Undertaker, HHH, as well as Vader? Sorry that clip of Linda McMahon getting pile driven brought up the nostalgia for wrestlin… back when it was WWF, not the WWE piece of shit that’s dumped on us these days.
qaf: That’s right, yo. ACORN should be paying Louisiana back the non-money that they owe the state.
June Cleaver 2.0: That’s really something, isn’t it? This guys is phonier than a three-dollar bill, and yet because he hates the same things and people they do they give him a pass when our most decent president is subject to all kinds of bat-shit insanity.
BTW, does anyone remember when just back a year ago Interor Department employees were literally having drug-and-alcohol induced sex romps with oil and gas reps, and using public funds to splurge on Toby Keith tickets, paint balling, and pro-sports games, and cocaine and weed?
Yeah, and it’s ACORN that’s the bad nut. Remember that.
Jindal BETTER do as he is tole. Y’all!