Wonkette
Yeah yeah yeah, here’s Joe Wilson’s video where he’s like, “I called Obama a nancy on teevee, which was bad, now give me buckets of money.” But that’s not what this post will be about! Instead, we will study this important headline from The Hill: “Wilson took caffeine pills in 2007.” What a girl! In 2007!
Worst ADHD self-medicating plan ever:
Rep. Joe Wilson (R-S.C.), who shouted “you lie!” at President Obama during his Wednesday night address to Congress, admitted to regularly consuming caffeine pills in 2007.
It is unclear if Wilson still takes NoDoz, a brand of pill that contains 200 milligrams of caffeine a pop. By comparison, a seven ounce cup of drip coffee contains 115 to 175 milligrams of caffeine.
A source told The Hill in 2007 that the congressman ingested the tablets “like candy,” but Wilson insisted he was not addicted despite the fact that he had been taking them since high school.
“I love coffee, but I don’t have time to drink it and I don’t have access to it,” Wilson said at the time.
How does one find said “coffees?” Must he travel to Colombia to plant & harvest the beans himself? He’s Joe Wilson for fuck’s sake! He has important legislation to work on.
Still, one must be concerned about Joe Wilson, in 2007. As tipster “Chris” notes, the dark side of caffeine pill addiction-and-denial was once well documented on late-80s/early-90s Saturday morning television.
“I NEED THEM! I NEED THEM BACK! I HAVE TO SING TONIGHT!!!” — Rep. Joe Wilson, in Congress, 9/9/09
Stand with Joe at JoeWilsonforCongress.com [YouTube]
Wilson took caffeine pills in 2007 [The Hill]
Someone needs to cane this bitch.
Dear god: pleez giv addison wilson addison’s disease. thanx HS Junkie
His apology was crap.
His motives obvious.
He doesn’t need to be censured, he needs to be scorned, mocked and then tossed on the “Useless joe” trash heap with that other Joe clown… “The Plumber.”
http://marmel.com/2009/09/joe-wilson-apologizes-and-grovels-for-cash/
I… do… not… support… our… teleprompter… president…. thank… you.
They had a teleprompter for ’spontaneous outbursts’.
Only No-doz? He hasn’t gone on to meth?
Why must we all be such haters?
Somehow he looks like Tony Blair to me. I can’t figure it out.
How totally fucked up is your life that you can’t get access to coffee?? Hobos living under bridges can manage to get a cuppa Joe every morning for fucks sake! He just liked the thought of taking pills, but was too much of a pussy to try real drugs.
You Lie… with young male interns.
NoDoz=SC meth. I’m sure Snowbilly could hook him up with some good Wasilla meth if he’d just ask.
I’m still impressed that his douchbaggery managed to raise $750K and rising for his opponent. It may not help the other guy win, but i just find it gloriously amusing.
I was able to watch the Wilco video and the saved by the bell clip, but all the others … not so much.
Is No-Doz the new Twinkie defence?
Bwhahahahaa! That notorious Saved By the Bell “drug” episode. My brother and I were laughing about it the other day.
I always thought Screetch was kinda cool in Saved by the Bell.
Basically he sez: After a month of acting like a fucking baby and yelling nonsense about this issue, I still didn’t get all the crazy out of my system. So I heckled the president like a disappointed dad at a little league game. For that, I am sorry. But I will probably do it again.
A source told The Hill in 2007 that the congressman ingested the tablets “like candy,” but Wilson insisted he was not addicted despite the fact that he had been taking them since high school.
Addison, (Joe), the caffeine whore.
That Saved By the Bell clip gives me my only reason not to be unhappy that I’m so goddammed old (in my late 40s), and thus too old to have been tempted to watch that show. Yes, I realize my generation has to answer for The Brady Bunch.
That is all.
Maybe he should try E instead - and when he needs to take the edge off, a little Special K will do the job.
Larry Craig could totally hook him up.
By the time “Charlie Wilson’s War” made it to the screen it starred Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts. By the time “Joe Wilson’s Freakout” makes it to the screen will it star Bill Murray and Drew Barrymore?
All that pill-popping must be responsible for his joining the racist/secessionist Sons of Confederate Veterans and being one of the seven SC state legislators who voted to keep the Confederate flag flying over the SC capitol building.
He doesn’t have access to coffee. That is true- we do not have coffee anywhere in the DC metro area. I have been to the Hill and there are guards who take away your coffee if you smuggle some in(from like Venezuela or Africa-commie and muslin places- also with dark skinned people). Those things that look like coffee machines in offices on the Hill are not. I bet the same thing is true in South Carolina.
“I will not be muzzled.”
No? How about hog-tied, ball-gagged, and forced to lie under a glass coffee table while a 250-male hooker squats and takes a shit over your face? Oh, sorry Joe. For you, that’s just foreplay.
Jeezus Z. Zeist!!! wil some one PLEASE talk about the health care speech. I’ve fucking had it with this Joe Wilson shit. the entire summer everone is carrying guns and biting people and now it’s boiled down to this!?! What about the healthcare bill!11 Fuck it I’ll admit this where I get my talking points; so what- fuck you. Did the President even give a fucking speech? Was he there or what? What the fuck has happened to our country?
That big honking button on his lapel…. Does that mean he’s a top or a bottom? I always forget which can be kind of awkward.
If he supplemented the NoDoz with cigarettes and Diet Coke, can I sue him for stealing my patented College Sophomore Diet Plan for Those Too Lazy to Exercise (TM)?
Wilson’s aversion to actually drinking coffee stems from his patriotic hatred of all things ferign. So actually, he was being even more real ‘murkin in 2007, by boycotting coffee, than he is now. Today, he is just one more coffee-drinking arugla-eating socialist non-NoDoz popping pansy poufter.
Bebe: cigarettes and
Diet CokeTab.Never forget!
No-Doz only has 100mg of caffeine. They’re thinking of the hard stuff (Vivarin.)
Maybe he was just pulling a Dr. House style “Everybody lies” routine, only amplified, because he was on different drugs? Or maybe he is just an asshole?
shadowMark: Do not besmirch the good name of Bill Murray by even suggesting he participate in a film with Dr. Droopytits, Drew Barrymore. Thank you.
LSD is actually the best when you don’t feel the need to sleep. Please excuse me, I need to excise the tarantualas that are under my skin.
A couple of drinks, and he became a fortuneteller…
Nah. I’m a No-Doz addict, and the pills don’t make me say stupid things.
Marmel: Blogwhoring on this most sacred of days? Have you no shame, sir?
It’s great watching his video rating inch back and forth between 1 1/4 and 1 3/4 star.
the lady MS. Sheila Dixon: I think I know who’s been sharing the No Doz…
He must have picked up the habit interning for Strom Thurmond when his official capacity was to “keep track off all the coons.”
I think I once had a cup of triple espresso at a place called “No-Doz-Joe’s”. If I’m not mistaken, it was in EWE LAH, SC.
the lady MS. Sheila Dixon: Too much caffeine today?
The Station Manager: “Maybe”? I don’t need no stinking “maybe.”
HA! He actually says “gubmint” repeatedly. What a fucking goober!
After the interview, Rep. Wilson was seen preparing a “suicide” (except for the root beer) at the soda fountain. When approached, Mr. Wilson said “I’m not addicted, and I can quit anytime I want.”
Naked Bunny with a Whip: Yes, but if you grind them up and SNORT them, like Joe does…that’s when things get really interesting…
He has taken something. He doesn’t blink his eyes.
ignatius_riley: Do not besmirch the good name of Bill Murray by even suggesting he participate in a film with Dr. Droopytits, Drew Barrymore–Drew? Is that you?
@SparkleKitty: *takes notes*
I… am… Tim Calhoun…If there’s an important call at 3 in the morning… who do you want answering the phone? Some snobby jerk with an Ivy League education… or a grade school educated crystal meth enthusiast who literally cannot wait to push the button?
Joe reads that tEleProMptEr with the believability of Larry The Cable Guy doing Shakespeare. No, wait. Moliere.
How do you “not have time” to drink coffee? You put it in a cup, then you put it in your mouth. You can do other things (drive, type, shill for Big Pharma, make not-so-vaguely racist statements about Strom Thurmond’s daughter) while you drink coffee. He has interns and such to bring him coffee, if he wants it.
A man too dumb to have other people whose job it is to get coffee get coffee for him; a man too stupid to drink coffee while doing … anything else; this is a man who needs to not look up during rainstorms, to avoid self-waterboarding. What a (speed-freak) dingus.
finallyhappy: I believe the Taliban’s money comes from growing and smuggling huge quantities of coffee beans. They genetically modified the plants to look like opium poppies to disguise this fact.
queeraselvis v 2.0: why you gotta bring the hawtness to this for?
The original story is so lame it’s laughable.
Also, I drink a pot of steaming hot African coffee every day, and you don’t see me verbally bitch-slapping heads of state! Though believe me, I’ve wanted to….
I have seen twitchy, and Addison Graves Wilson is no Ann Coulter. Judging from his presence on the teevee, I’d rate him no higher than three (maybe four) Bourbon-and-Mountain-Dews.
He should have slipped his coat collar over his head, put up his hands and screamed “I AM CORNHOLIO! YOU LIE!!!”
Scrodd: uh oh….
New revised Blingee coming RIGHT UP!
http://blingee.com/blingee/view/98772684-Tweakin-Joe
Okay, which one of you started a DDOS on http://www.JoeWilsonForCongress.com? Poor Joe’s “Pay me for being an asshole to the Prez” site is down.
queeraselvis v 2.0: “I will not be muzzled.”
Watch it again.
I swore he said “I will not be Muslim.”
Barack Obama talks about Joe Wilson’s Mama
From KPFT Pacifica Radio last night
http://acksisofevil.org/audio/joemama.mp3
RabidHamster: Wilz would have you believe it’s crashed perhaps because of being inundated with donations to the tune of about $700,000 — which sum “puts Wilson on par with what his opponent has received” sez WSJonline.
However I haven’t seen this covered on Drudge yet so let’s wait for that, um, verification.
What’s with all these carrot color skinned Republicans?
Don Emanuel, I am honored and grateful that you have invited me to our nation’s home on the speech day of your boss. And may their third child be a masculine child.
Addison “Luca” Graves Wilson
Is there any issue that we can muzzle him on? If not health care, then maybe pretty much everything else?
Can someone with a tanel for the Internet video mashup please create a vid that has other melodrmatic meglomaniacs screaming “you lie” or to simillar effect such as Invader Zim. Also. Wink
hey Jim, the only people who think of caffine pills as a self-medicating adhd trick are twenty something males who got diagnosed as kids but are freelancers so don’t have health insurance now.
know anyone like that?
drpangloss: did someone say Blingee?!
http://blingee.com/blingee/get_code/98854418?image=514021203
Deacon Frank Orris: If I were an intern for this guy, I would not put this on my resume. Anything you would ‘learn’ from this has no applicability in real, or fake America