Wonkette
Oh dear: Rep. Patrick McHenry (R-NC) has apparently read The POLITICO’s major investigative breaking news scoop about Obama’s “czars.” He thinks Obama should keep Russian oligarchs OUT of our schools and hospitals, and McHenry would like these czars to divulge their responsibilities to Congress. All 30 of them. Or all 44 of them, if there are 44. However many czars there are, that’s how many should be begging Patrick McHenry to not send them back on a trans-Atlantic steamship to the Hermitage whence they came.
He recently whined all this to Ed Towns (D-NY), Chairman of the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee, of which McHenry is also, somehow, a member.
“If the czars have high-level, decision-making authority as their titles would indicate, then it is my concern that their appointment without Senate approval represents a circumvention of our Constitutionally-mandated confirmation process.”
Patrick Henry will not rest until Obama’s new Cynically Capitalizing On Minor News Events Czar Patrick McHenry is forced to admit his treason and is sent to go be an Uighur somewhere or something.
[The Hill]
Patrick McHenry better keep his criticism of the Tsar under wraps, or he’s gonna find himself on the wrong end of a train to Siberia.
SENATOR ISELIN: There’s just one thing, babe. I’d be a lot happier if we could just settle on the number of Communists I know there are in the Defense Department.
“If the czars have high-level, decision-making authority as their titles would indicate, then it is my concern that their appointment without Senate approval represents a circumvention of our Constitutionally-mandated confirmation process.”
Good for you, Pat! You used big words there and used them appropriately. Let me put a star in your notebook. This puts you ahead of most of your GOP colleagues.
Doesn’t that make Patrick Henry a bolshevik?
McHenry.
THE WHITE HOUSE
EXECUTIVE OFFICE OF THE PRESIDENT
PRESS RELEASE
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE SEPT. 10, 2009
WASHINGTON, D.C., Sept. 10, 2009—Haddington England Wellington, a veteran member of the federal government’s Senior Executive Service, has been appointed by President Obama as the White House Czar of Czars. Wellington will oversee the approximately 40, or thereabouts, official White House Czars, who oversee other people who oversee other people at numerous duplicative, over-burdended and over-staffed federal government bureaucratic agencies.
Wellington’s first responsiblity will be to figure out exactly how many White House Czars there are. After that, his next task will be to figure out why the federal government has anywhere from 16 to 22 “intelligence” agencies, including a CIA and a Office of the Director of National Intelligence, as well as DIA, an NSA, a NGA, a DEA, an FBI, Justice intelligence offices, Defense intelligence offices, Treasury intelligence offices, and at least four military intelligence agencies.
Wellington will also be charged with evaluating why the federal government has at least half a dozen foreign aid agencies, all of which apparently do the same thing, including the U.S. Trade Representative’s Office, offices at the Commerce Department, offices at the State Department, the U.S. Agency for International Development, the U.S. Trade and Development Agency, the Peace Corps, the Millenium Challenge Corporation, the U.S. Export-Import Bank, and several other foreign aid departments, bureaus and offices.
Next, Wellington will be tasked with figuring out why the federal government has a National Institutes of Health, a Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, a U.S. Army Medical Research Institute of Infectious Diseases, and several other federal government agencies that do the exact same medical, scientific and biological research functions, often competing with each other.
UPDATE: THIS JUST IN: Wellington has withdrawn from consideration as the White House Czar of Czars.
And where are the anarchists in all of this? It’s not really a revolution unless there are anarchists.
“Give me McLiberty, or give me McDeath.”
Sorry, North Carolina. You are so far behind in the race for craziest Carolina that you might as well become South Virginia.
McHenry’s just afraid BHO will appoint a Czar For Outing Closeted Republicans.
I have faith that Sarah Palin will soon explain why these soviet czars insult troops and 9/11 victims on her facebook page. In related news, it’s nice to see that she’s writing her own stuff again.
Does that mean the czars are going to end up in a ditch somewhere deep in the Ural mountains?
This human fart and acknowledged horse fucker sullies the memory of Prussian cities with funny-sounding names, those which exist now only in the memory of very old Nazis…Elbing, Fischhausen, Gumbinnen, Insterburg, Königsberg, Pillau, Preußisch Eylau, Rastenburg, Tilsit, Wormditt…
“Give me czar approval, or give me death!”
“If the czars have high-level, decision-making authority as their titles would indicate…
What kind of ass clown fails to realize that czar’s have NO power? The only difference between our Drug Czar and the kid working the fry station at my McDonald’s is that the Mr. Minimum Wage can get me a dime bag.
>If the czars have high-level, decision-making authority as their titles would indicate
If this was Russia, that might be true…in 1917.
Obviously, this means that McHenry is a radical communist revolutionary.
“I have in my pocket the names of 10,000 czars”
SayItWithWookies: Paultards
norbizness: 57! There are exactly 57 Communists in …
do our czars walk around in late 19th century military uniforms like Nicolas II? ’cause that would be a sure way to identify them.
This guys an ass-clown of near-epic proportion….Director of National Intelligence, an Undersecretary of Defense (AT&L) and about 9 others all require Senate ratification. Twenty more were left-overs from other administrations.
Obama mercyfully shitcanned the Abstinence Czar leftover from previous admin.
Czar vs. Tsar: The Transliteration Wars
This Time It’s Systematical
Patrick Henry: “Give me liberty or give me death.”
Patrick McHenry: “UM, CAN I HAZ SOME CZZZZAR OBERSITE?”
Honestly, I can’t tell the difference.
I think Obama needs to appoint two more czars…a douchebag czar to deal with the teabaggers and a snuff czar to deal with idiots who shout liar at him…god what a schoolgirl….liar, liar pants on fire - this is what passes for political discourse now?
hobospacejunkie: ‘Tsar’ makes sense because of the original Russian. ‘Czar’ is all fucked up on drugs.
“If the czars have high-level, decision-making authority as their titles would indicate, then it is my concern that their appointment without Senate approval represents a circumvention of our Constitutionally-mandated confirmation process.”
Were I a congressman I guess my response would have to be,
A.) Well, I for one am very afraid for the future…or not, I will have to check Fox news to see if I should be…but I’m pretty sure I’m afraid.
Or;
B.) I could just stand up and blurt out “you lie” at Mr. Mc Henry.
depending on my level of crazy wingnuttiness.
a snuff czar to deal with idiots who shout liar at him
That’s what the Cossacks were for. Short of beheading, he’d at least be in Siberia licking icicles by now.
They’re such fucking children, these assholes. Rachel did a great segment this week about the idiots bloviating about “CZARS!!!1″ and how they’re all positions that have been in administrations back to Reagan and beyond. “Communications Czar” is just a succinct way of describing “Associate Vice-commissioner for FCC and Congressional Liaising on National Security, Intelligence and Media.”
Fuckwits.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26315908/vp/32747928#32747928
TGY: And that is a witty turn of phrase.
Bags of shit like this cocksucker McHenry, who I happen to a constituent of and also receive his emails, inspire me to start working on my screenplay: Civil War 2. For decades the filthy American south has stagnated and dragged down the rest of the country. The north, under the military leadership of the great-great-whatever grandson of General Sherman (he’ll be black) decide to move in and finish the job. This time there will be no reconstruction. No carpetbaggers. The south will burn down to the warped steel of the last trailer home, and General Sherman will finish what his ancestor started. Once and for all.
Besides, calling all these hangers-on “Czar” is pretty stupid and over-dramatic. It seems that everyone who is the head of a government dept. is now dubbed a “Czar”. It’s not a very desirable title, since they tend to shoot Czars, don’t they? Either that or blow them up. Very few ever got to die of old age.
Czar Wars
Unitary executive, bitches!!! How you like it now?
What about the Czar of Making the Sport-Obsessed Look the Other Way, Lindsay Czarniak?
http://cdn.allleftturns.com/www/sites/default/files/articles/czarniak_1_0.jpg
She loves junkies, too! Don’t do drugs!
Can Riley be the Intern Czar?
hobospacejunkie: Czar vs. Tsar…
I tend to use “tsar” for the monarch and “czar” for whatever the newspapers are calling it (e.g. “crime czar”).
But shouldn’t we have some Grand Dukes too?
It seems to me that a circumvention of your constitutionally mandated confirmation process would be in order, since you are just trying to block all of Obama’s appointments for bullshit reasons.
Eat a bag of McDicks.
Cranky diaper baby Lou Dobbs was on and on about this “shocking” development the other night. Effers.
Reefpilot: Sounds great. I always like a novel with a happy ending.
nbawriter: “Sorry, North Carolina. You are so far behind in the race for craziest Carolina …”
Ha, you forget we had Jesse Helms. We EARNED that title and we ain’t giving it up for nothin’.
Alas, Anastasia Nikolaevna! Where are you now?
That little McHenry shit has the same sneer as Sean Hannity and you can tell by their attitude they both had their asses kicked by girls when they were growing up.
Does this mean the Obama White House is filling up with Fabergé eggs, mad mystic monks, slutty ballerinas and endless cases of Louis Roederer Cristal? Can I be a Tsar as well? Please!?!
Oldskool: Jesse Helms, Thomas Wright, RC Soles… oh and what was the name of the leader of the Democrat Party, Durham County, who was arrested a year or so ago because she and her boyfriend kidnapped people and kept them in dog cages to perform satanic rituals? Yeah, it’ll take more than a little South American booty call and home-schooled gay porn to knock us down.
Since it’s pronounced “Wee-ghur” shouldn’t it be “a Uighur”? Come on Wonkette, it’s not like this a little-known ethnic group or something.
I am the Drug Czar. I know where the drugs are.
Reefpilot: I came.
This is the same congressman Patrick McHenry who was involved in that gay porn ring and all those murders? I thought he changed his name and moved to Florida? ? Does he still live with that porn actor?