MEET YOUR NEW HEROES  1:39 pm September 8, 2009

This New Slob Will Save America From ObamaCare, Tomorrow

by Jim Newell

Boxy McBoxysonSome Charles Boustany news, everyone! Surely you know about Charles Boustany? He is a Republican congressman from Louisiana — no, not the Vietnamese one — who is also a Doctor, a Surgeon. And according to Beltway politics insider person George Stephanopoulos, Boustany will deliver the GOP response to Obama’s big speech tomorrow night! But how powerful can this response be, when Boustany himself loves Death Panels? [ABC News]

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Hola wonkerados.

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ChernobylSoup v2 September 8, 2009 at 1:49 pm

I hope he does just as well as the last Louisianan who followed an Obama address to a joint session of Congress.

Free Advice: Avoid the whole “plantation” backdrop. That image is kinda loaded.

AnnieGetYourFun September 8, 2009 at 1:52 pm

Jim, can you at least live-blog the horrible Republican response? Please? It’s my birfday.

Extemporanus September 8, 2009 at 1:52 pm

Is everyone withholding comment until Marmel weighs in, or something?

TGY September 8, 2009 at 1:53 pm

Yet another physician sucking on the bodacious teat of government. I cry ‘fie’ on you, teat-sucker! And by ‘fie’ I mean ‘eat a bag of dicks’.

Larry McAwful September 8, 2009 at 1:53 pm

I hope he gives some job search tips on how to land a position on a death panel. I’ve looked all over Monster and can’t find anything about it. I think that’s something I could really excel at.

V572625694 September 8, 2009 at 1:54 pm

Takes one back the glory days when Jim Wright was speaker of the house and delivered the Democratic response to GHW Bush’s speeches.

What? No one else remembers the Ritual Response Address® of any politician, anywhere, anytime?

All right, carry on then.

Whiskeybaby September 8, 2009 at 1:54 pm

I fail to see how this could possibly backfire.

Also he looks like Peewee Herman after a Bic mac bender.

freakishlystrong September 8, 2009 at 1:55 pm

who is also a Doctor, a Surgeon
If he’s also a dentist and a real estate agent,I want a live shot on Oily Taints
the whole time he’s speaking.

V572625694 September 8, 2009 at 1:55 pm

[re=404625]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Happy birfday! But let’s see that sir-tiffy-cat.

Rukasu September 8, 2009 at 1:57 pm

Ha ha ha, the JPEG name, lol

misterfixit September 8, 2009 at 1:58 pm

Will be TiVoing to see entrance involving change of loafers to laceups and blazer to cardigan

Cape Clod September 8, 2009 at 1:58 pm

I don’t know. The last time a Republican from Louisiana gave the opposition response to a speech by the President I seem to remember that he got mocked, ridiculed and wrote off any hopes for higher office.

clownshoez September 8, 2009 at 2:00 pm

I am ashamed of my Wonkette today. You missed the BIGGER story, which was that Charles Boustany once tried to buy himself an English title!

All Hail Lord Boustany!

queeraselvis v 2.0 September 8, 2009 at 2:02 pm

[re=404621]ChernobylSoup v2[/re]: I wouldn’t worry about the plantation backdrop. Boustany’s from Cajun Country, so I’d expect more of a crawfish-and-nutria-boil-on-the-bayou, with Justin Wilson doing color commentary.

freakishlystrong September 8, 2009 at 2:06 pm

[re=404641]Cape Clod[/re]: It was barking mad. It’s like they dragged their hidden cousin “Beverly” down from the attic and in to the semi-torchlit daylit foyer of the antebellum.. And he only knows how to talk by singing.

Tommmcatt September 8, 2009 at 2:07 pm

So what’s the bet: Will he be a freak, like Jindal, an asshole, like Boehner, or a nutjob like Bachmann? Those are the three species of Republican, right?

house of the blue lights September 8, 2009 at 2:08 pm

Please stop posting such low-hanging fruit(s). I’m trying to work here. Also, just as a point of order, where does one get all these “bags of dicks” (salted or otherwise) that people seem to be consuming? They do not have them at my local supermercado (unless I’ve got the spanish wrong and am accidentally asking for something else).

Come here a minute September 8, 2009 at 2:08 pm

I bet this guy sounds just like Tracy Jordan.

Naked Bunny with a Whip September 8, 2009 at 2:10 pm

So, who delivered the Republican rebuttal to Obama’s “stay in school, kids” speech?

freakishlystrong September 8, 2009 at 2:11 pm

[re=404651]Tommmcatt[/re]: You missed “Racist”. But nice job!

AnnieGetYourFun September 8, 2009 at 2:11 pm

[re=404636]V572625694[/re]: Glitter Graphics

hobospacejunkie September 8, 2009 at 2:12 pm

[re=404625]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Happy Birthday! How can we spank you?

Voyou Charmant September 8, 2009 at 2:13 pm

Why is the GOP dragging out Buster Bluth? I think this is just a viral marketing campaign for the Arrested Development movie.

Srsly; he looks just fucking like him. Also, though!

RoscoePColtraine September 8, 2009 at 2:15 pm

Preemptive FAIL based on his official portrait.

AnnieGetYourFun September 8, 2009 at 2:16 pm

[re=404660]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Well, that didn’t fucking work at all.

[re=404662]hobospacejunkie[/re]: Any manner you please, actually. I’m not picky, as long as my hair is pulled.

Voyou Charmant September 8, 2009 at 2:16 pm

@Come here a minute — God I hope so.

but4real: Charles “Buster” Boustany

snideinplainsight September 8, 2009 at 2:17 pm

Some pig.

AnnieGetYourFun September 8, 2009 at 2:19 pm

Boustany, I knew Bobby Jindal. I was exorcised by Bobby Jindal. Bobby Jindal was a friend of mine. You, Boustany, are no Bobby Nguyen Jindal.

Larry McAwful September 8, 2009 at 2:20 pm

[re=404657]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: I think it was Joe the Plumber. My favorite part was when he shook his fist and said, “When your weenie English teacher tries to run you in for hanging out behind your school, smokin’ cigarettes, just tell him like I did: ‘I don’t need no education to unplug toilets. I’m just plain folk.’ Then I flipped him off. So should you!” Then Joe took another swig out of his can of Coors and told all the illegals’ kids to get the hell out of the classroom. Action politics!

Carl Spakler September 8, 2009 at 2:24 pm

The kid from 30 Rock, now this ass-clown…shoot, maybe they could wheel out DaVitter (R-Whorehouse) for the trifecta.

ChernobylSoup v2 September 8, 2009 at 2:39 pm

[re=404652]house of the blue lights[/re]: Low hanging fruit my ass. I had to think back all the way to last February for my material. Do you have any idea how much that hurts the brain of someone as thick as me?

norbizness September 8, 2009 at 2:53 pm

[re=404665]Voyou Charmant[/re]: “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to attend the annual MotherBoy dance.”

Tommmcatt September 8, 2009 at 2:54 pm


Racist is the Genus… Rebublicus Racista Fatum, Rebublicus Rasista Vacuusvenia, Republicus Racista Rabies

clownshoez September 8, 2009 at 3:08 pm
naveed September 8, 2009 at 3:23 pm

Hussein vs. Boustany

I bet on the Kenyan. Lebanese can’t fight.

WickedWitch September 8, 2009 at 3:32 pm

[re=404785]naveed[/re]: Nicely played.

Also — the GOP is now trying to fight the secret Muslin from Kenya and Indonesia with an Arab of their own.

Affirmative action is killing me.

Better American Than You September 8, 2009 at 4:02 pm

America again sees the new face of the Republican party, and America again says: Meh?

Remember, Boustany is but an anagram for “Nosy Tuba” and “A Boy’s Nut.”

DustBowlBlues September 8, 2009 at 4:11 pm

[re=404643]clownshoez[/re]: I’ll bet the Rebublic party is really, really pleased no one else will be able to search this on the interwebs because it would be embarrassing if Keith Olberman or Rachel Maddow have anyone on their staffs who understood how to use The Google.

S.Luggo September 8, 2009 at 4:14 pm

Doctor-Surgeon-Representative-Lord Charles Bootay is quite the piece of work:

• Voted NO on adding 2 to 4 million children to SCHIP eligibility. (Oct 2007)
• Voted NO on requiring negotiated Rx prices for Medicare part D. (Jan 2007)
• Voted YES on denying non-emergency treatment for lack of Medicare co-pay. (Feb 2006)
• Voted NO on expanding research to more embryonic stem cell lines. (Jan 2007)
• Voted NO on allowing human embryonic stem cell research. (May 2005)

• Voted YES on $23B INSTEAD of $4.9B for waterway infrastructure. (Nov 2007) [Speaking of pork]


DustBowlBlues September 8, 2009 at 4:31 pm

I’m from Oklahoma. It takes a lot more for a creepy Republican doctor to impress me. On the upside, it probably has our own Spooky Doktor Tom jealous as hell. He loves being on the teevee.

Jukesgrrl September 8, 2009 at 4:36 pm

[re=404643]clownshoez[/re]: Are we sure that Lord Boustany’s medical degree isn’t from the University of Phoenix?

[re=404651]Tommmcatt[/re]: In the Republican species department, you forgot wimminfolk like Orrin and Miss Lindsey.

Larry McAwful September 8, 2009 at 4:42 pm

[re=404886]Jukesgrrl[/re]: If that’s where he got his medical degree, then I hope he takes some time in his rebuttal to tell us why online college is so rocking.

Better American Than You September 8, 2009 at 5:02 pm

Dude was a KA at LSU. They wave Rebel flags and don’t like people like him.

Also, he hates America. Couldn’t bring himself to support “H RES 1200: Honoring the Dedication and Outstanding Work of Military Support Groups Across the Country for Their Steadfast Support of the Members of Our Armed Forces and Their Families.”

President Beeblebrox September 8, 2009 at 5:30 pm

[re=404621]ChernobylSoup v2[/re]:

PROTIP: Avoid making a swishy entrance when giving a nationally-televised Rebuttal to the President.

S.Luggo September 8, 2009 at 5:42 pm

Doctor-Surgeon-Representative-Lord-DEATHER Charles Boo-tay:

“GOP Chooses Rep. Boustany, Co-Sponsor Of So-Called ‘Death Panel’ Provision, To Deliver Obama Rebuttal”
“Actually, one of Boustany’s most notable proposals has received bipartisan support and was included in health care legislation: a plan to permit Medicare to pay for voluntary end-of-life counseling.”

GreatOldOnesParty September 8, 2009 at 5:53 pm
S.Luggo September 8, 2009 at 6:02 pm

[re=405013]GreatOldOnesParty[/re]: His Queenship Lord Charles Boo-tay, M.D., of Pickle Jar, La., looks very nice, ‘cept I don’t see no Medicare death panel in the blingee. How about a bat?

Tommmcatt September 8, 2009 at 6:35 pm


Republica Closetus Faggita

Guppy06 September 8, 2009 at 9:26 pm

The GOP is rapidly running out of faces to put in front of the TV cameras. Pretty soon Obama’s speeches will be countered by the Republican dog-catcher of Podunk, WY.

And where was the Republican answer to the dread Socialist Indoctrination of Our Nation’s Schoolchildren? Home schooling for all!

DustBowlBlues September 8, 2009 at 11:27 pm

Well, fuck the wonkeratti who posted the link to Matt Taibi’s reaming of health reform. Now I’m so depressed, I hardly feel like marching for health reform on Sunday, a dangerous activity here in teabagging Okrahoma.

Why do the Republics even bother parading people like would-be Lord Douchebag before the cameras? miniMax Baucus has done their work for them. Or is the right’s fanaticism on the issue simply to make people–innocent dupes, more like it–like me believe that health care reform even matters?

Fuck this shit and fuck corporate cocksuckers.

LoweredPeninsula September 9, 2009 at 12:54 am

[re=404785]naveed[/re]: Ha, tell that to Hezbollah. Though, at least in hand-to-hand combat, the Maasai warriors would kick their Levantine asses.

[re=405150]Guppy06[/re]: Wrong. Eventually, they’ll run out of people, and just set up a webcam showing a monkey smearing poo on the lens and screaming incoherently. You know, like M. Bachmann.

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