Wonkette
Sorry but this might be a “LOCALS ONLY” post and the rest of you are just going to have to deal with that, okay? Okay. PSST, HUMANS IN WASHINGTON: our local professional sports team, the Redskins, who play in Maryland, is the worst organization on Earth!
The Washington Post has an excellent (but long!) feature today about how, when season ticket holders with multi-year contracts default on their payments — which happens quite often now due to the recent evaporation of all global wealth — the Redskins lawyers immediately SUE THEIR KNICKERS OFF and always win and demand full repayment of the total cost of the contract (+ interest!) which forces all of these people into deep bankruptcies that fucking fuck them for the rest of their lives. And then they resell the season tickets, and the cycle starts anew! The point is: fuck this stupid team and their farty owner Dan Snyder, who is mean.
For Redskins Fans, Hard Luck Runs Into Team’s Hard Line [WP]
Football…that’s a game kids play, right?
They’re doing it for the fans.
If Keith Shoutyman’s “Worst Person in the World” competition were real, all the contestants would be jock-sniffing sports team owners. The “Skins” used to play in a town renamed “Raljon” to honor Jack-ass Kent Cook’s idiot sons. Did they ever change the name back?
this is what you get when your owner is a jerk who made his money sending you junk mail.
Even for locals, the coverage of the Redskins by the WaPo has been out of control this year. It has been all Redskins all the time for a month now. They were covering the Redskins all over Sports before the first preseason game. And today and yesterday these stories have been front page, A-1, above the fold. Instead of, say, a story explaining substantive issues about the health care proposals, maybe (in lieu of yet another “Let’s repeat the lies that screaming nutjobs tell” story).
Rant over.
Truck Nutz.
Aaaaand yesterday’s front page headline was about how they directly sell tickets to brokers, who obv sell to fans of foreign teams (dern you, Kang and Kodos fans!) for higher prices, leaving the Fedex stands running amock with non locals. It’s almost as if it were, gasp, Camden Yards.
They should hire Vick to further their public image (as douchenozzles).
Dan — category 5 douchiness is one of those gifts that should be hidden under a bushel. And I was actually feeling some sympathy for the Skins since they got Jim Zorn to coach for them, since I liked him when he QB’d for the Seahawks. Thank you for allowing me to root for the Skins’ utter failure free of any twinge of regret.
Way to build the customer base, team whose mascot is a racial slur. Perhaps you do not realize that no one in the sued person’s family will be buying crappy Red Man doodads and trinkets ever again. Then again, American football bores me to tears so what do I care? Sue away, morans.
Forcing deadbeats to watch the Redskins week after week for ever and ever seems like torture and should be outlawed.
And their team name is racist. It’s a win-win!
Added to which, any organization that can make Kansas City Royals fans feel better about themselves is just beyond the pale.
Haha Redskins. I hope they enjoy starting the season 0-1, because the Giants are gonna kick their asses.
As a life long Cowboys fan, I join Wonkette in saying @#!$ the Redskins for suing that little old lady…That said, if the ’skins don’t kill her, the death panels will.
No one is looking at this from the Redskins’ perspective. They were counting on that money. Mulitmillion-dollar football franchises gotta eat, too.
You’re the fat kid with glasses of your division, you try desperately to replace your quaterback in the off season and failed, and you’re suing the people who in the past had paid hard earned money for your product? Call the Harvard Business School, stat. These guys must really be onto something.
nationalize ticket-selling immediately
Wonder if they’re going to sue Sean Taylor for breach of contract.
Too soon?
The Redskins are truly America’s Football Team.
I don’t think a team that plays in Maryland should be able to call itself “Washington” anything. I don’t go by the pseudonym “Wild Washingtonian.” That would be false on two levels.
seriously, douchy with a capital D.
I’d always assumed that the Redskins had to pay their “fans” to get them to come to their games. You know, like the Lions do in Detroit.
Did you see photo of the elderly lady they sued? She’s had season tickets since 1962, her living room is full of Redskins tchotchkas including a rug she made herself.
Dan, dude, this is your p.r. turning point. Now go on TV and say that your chief of season ticket sales is doing a heckuva job.
Doglessliberal: Srsly. WaPo Redskins coverage pretty much always seems hyperbolic because the Skins usually stand out for their mediocrity in a reliably underachieving division. They will barely win six or seven games, just like the past five seasons. The Redskins and Snyder are even less relevant this year, if humanly possible, than they have ever been before.
Are there not enough back-to-schoolers getting hit by Metrobuses or something, wtf?
Dave J.: don’t give Snyder any ideas.
Mild Midwesterner: So the Maryland Redskins will be playing against the New Jersey Giants?
problemwithcaring: Zactly. And, maybe, baseball coverage? (insert Nationals joke here, I know, I know).
Nice! But will they offer refunds to their loyal season ticket holders when the ‘Skins go a woefully mediocre 8-8 again this season?
Mild Midwesterner: My mom teases my dad (a Cowboys fan) by calling them the Irving Cowboys, though I can’t remember where their new stadium is this year. Now I call her favorite team the Upper Marlboro Redskins, which gives me great pleasure. And I know the stadium’s really in Landover, but Upper Marlboro sounds more craptacular.
American “football” needs more riots to fix this attendance problem.
There is no bigger shitshow than the Oakland Raiders. Nice try, DC! But Dan Snyder’s got nothing on Kim Jong Al Davis and his Bottomless Black Hole.
As a Niners fan, I say fuck you very much, you AFuCktards.
AbstinenceOnly Ed: You guys sign Crabtree yet?
Ok, so maybe it is douchey on the part of the team, but seriously, the lady they lead with in the story was a real estate agent who got herself into an ARM that now costs her $5019 per month. Then she signed a 10 year season ticket contract as well. I think she might want to avoid signing any more contracts, ever.
Dave J.: He’s up in a tree eating crab until we agree to trade him to the Raiders, where he and Darisu Heyward-Bey can team up to drop their balls down the Bottomless Black Hole. 8-8, we cry!
Washington being a city essentially made out of lawyers, maybe watching the Redskins’ douchebags spike their default judgements in the endzone is as good as it’s ever going to get.
Egregious: Cowboys still have the title as the biggest shitstain in the NFL. Jerry Jones’s Big Screen Monstrosity From Hell is the most naked attempt at overcompensating for a small penis since Kim Jong Il’s obsession with Taepodong-2.
problemwithcaring: Agreed. Cowboys have demonstrated how it is possible to Win and yet Lose at the same time. Though kudos for having the league’s first openly Romosexual quarterback.
If it helps, here in Philadelphia our professional football team tortures puppies.
LOL.
No sympathy whatsoever for multi-year season ticket holders.
OK honestly - is anyone surprised by this? FedEx would have pay toilets if Snyder thought he could get away with it.
PerhapsSo: and throws snowballs at Santa
help, im covering for someone today and working with dr. steve. all he watches is fox news, its like his favorite channel….im gonna be spending the next 8 hours with him watching fox….and i wont even have any internet access. please help me my friends, this is serious and i dont know how im gonna make it!
What do you call a lawyer at the bottom the locker room ice bath?
Hart88: The snowballs at Santa thing is overdone. Now our football coverage involves the term “rape stand.” That’s quality programming right there.
Hart88: As an Iggles fan, and former Philudulfian, I have to say their acquiring Vick was totally in character. And, if he sucks, the fans will kill him. If he helps the team win, they will love him, until they boo him for one mistake.
Doglessliberal: As a Philly resident, I was shocked, shocked I tell you that they even got Vick. God forbid he should drop the ball or something. Time will tell…..What do I know, I root for the cross-state team. You know, the 6 time Super Champs Pittsburgh Steelers!!
DirtyHarriett: Six time Super BOWL Champs….excuse me….
These teams are corporations… acting like corporations. Best scam since religion.
Largely accepting the fact they will never change their name, I was about to start rooting for the Redskins until right around today. Go KC!
Yes, Jim, move the conversation to American Football, ignoring the fact that your boys “DC United” lost to the Seattle Sounders last night in the US Open Cup final.
I mean, the fact that you’re hurt and upset about it, so are trying to move the conversation elsewhere is the only reason you’ve not mentioned soccer today, right?
going into bankruptcy just to watch a bunch of pre-alzheimers HGH Concussions.
If the Redskins were the Steelers, they’d have thousands of people lined up to take those tickets at today’s price, not the price those people locked in years ago. Just for the record, the Steelers also don’t need a row of sparkle-clad, pom-pom-waving Miss South Carolinas to put asses in seats.
Y’all pay to watch guys play football for munnies? R U nuts? Out in the sticks, we get kids to do it for a fake college education, and it’s way more fun and exciting (Don’t believe it? Compare stadium size). Chumps.
When I lived in DC in the 90s, I kind of liked the Redskins. You kind of had to, especially when Tony Kornheiser wrote about them. He was awesome when he wrote about the Redskins. And god, at least the ‘Skins were better than the hateful Cowboys.
While it’s disturbing how racist the team name is, it is also emblematic of how deeply disturbed the US is.
TRUE STORY:
Dan Snyder comes to a fancy schmancy local elitist awesomeparty. The host, a genial man heading towards his 70s, says “Hi, Dan.” Dan Snyder says “You’ll call me Mr. Snyder.” With some disbelief the host explains that no, no he won’t really, because this is a gathering of friends and everybody is equal. Dan Snyder says that if he won’t be called Mr. Snyder, he’ll leave. The host refuses. Dan Snyder leaves.
Fuck that guy.
problemwithcaring: Look, any division is high achieving which does not inlcude Oakland, though all teams in it lose all their games.
Oakland has a fan base which is legendary, before they tightened the sentencing laws. These parolees who sat in the end zone for home game would pay something called a seat license, which was four grand, which merely entitled them to stand in line to buy season tickets. The owners in the NFL figure anybody who would pay more to see Oakland than to listen to Barbra Streisand is ripe for anything.
Hey shut up, Snyder is just trying to pay his weekly grocery bills like EVERYONE ELSE.
DirtyHarriett: Oh no need for correction. I think Super Champs is a great term and I will now be using it.
isadelia: but were they super fly? Or is that just Michael Steele?
Jukesgrrl:
I can always count my fellow ‘Burghers. Steelers reach Seventh Heaven in 2010.
Sports nuts cause so much damage to the lives of others, it’s just raw justice when they are consumed by the gods they worship.
Football teams versus football fans: no one to cheer for here.
Why is Gil Grissom the coach?
Did they kill someone?
Is there an insect problem with the Redskins?
Maybe Tom Delay.
also
Redskins? Not racist at all. Must be a fine organization.
Dan Snyder is obviously a ranting, raving psycho lunatic, because his organization loves suing financially-strapped people regarding season tickets to football games for an organization that is worth more than a billion dollars, charges people $25 to park, charges people to breath in its stadium (it seems), over-charges people for everything, fires people for no clear reason, fields lousy teams, treats its fans like crap, and sues financially-strapped 72-year-old grandmothers into bankruptcy–regarding football tickets.
Unbelievable.
The U.S. Department of Justice, the Federal Trade Commission and the U.S. Department of Commerce should be investigating the Redskins organization for alleged civil and criminal acts of misconduct, mismanagement, lying to customers and corrupt business practices–and that is not snark or humor.
2010 will be the year a few Hogette’s and ’skins Marching Band members get schwacked economically and then get their asses sued by Soulless Snyder…class act, you fucking ghoul!
Christian Adolph “Sonny” Jurgensen III wept.
P.S.
Maybe a Snyder-hating Paultard will hijack their RELOVUTION blimp and go full retard Black Sunday on FedEx Field!
This is what happens when you elect a userper as przinit
Wait. That’s the one with Ovechkin, right?
Those poor, oppressed NFL owners. They get taxpayer-subsidized stadiums, charge munnies for luxury boxes, charge $90 for large pizzas served in said boxes (or so the Consumerist sez, in an article about the new Cowgirls Stadium), and sue 73-year-old football fans who can’t pay for their seat licenses, all so they can pay huge, tattooed thugs way too much money to smash their heads together to give each other concussions and early-onset Parkinson’s.
America, fuck yeah.
President Beeblebrox: Let me put my tinfoil hat on; taxpayers funding stadiums for billionaire NFL owners, bailing out Wall Street bankers, AIG, a military budget equal to the rest of the world COMBINED and health insurance companies charging price increases double the rate of inflation for decades. Well, clearly the answer is the lazy poor people are drainning our hard earned tax dollars.
Bowdoin: Seriously, WTF is up w/Oakland? It’s not often that my Seattle teams get to beat up both Oakland teams in the same night but tonight it was Seahawks 31 - Raiders 21. Mariners 7 - Athletics 4.
Does Oakland have a MLS football club? ‘Cause I’m sure my Sounders would probably love to kick their asses if they could come over tonight.
Is it me, or does Dan Snyder have an asshole glow about him?