Wonkette
What can Obama do about this health care bill now! Such gridlock, heading into this high-stakes autumnal session of Congress: the liberals want one kind of bill, the moderates want another kind that pretends to cut spending but really just spends a lot more, and the conservatives want no bill, unless it’s a 100% cap gains tax cut and nothing else. How will Obama heal all of these paid-off factions? With a speech before a joint session of Congress! Oh, he’s going there. This is big. One week from today. U.S. Capitol. Midnight. (No it will be like 8/7 ET or whatever.) [CNN]
My blabbering hath been vindicated! Yearrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh!
I hope he shows up in his Ted Kennedy mask.
Nerdalicious: Nice work, fellow gimp!
I’m going to immediately shake myself a dirty fartini and pop a few “Cindy’s” in your honor.
He’s finally going to tackle steroids in baseball.
SayItWithWookies: This is too fucking important for masks.
He’s going to show up wearing Ted Kennedy’s actual face.
Extemporanus:
“I’m going to immediately shake myself a dirty fartini and pop a few “Cindy’s” in your honor.”
“I just want to make the world a happy, lovely place for all the peeps & (alcholics & addicts). So thank you, thank you! (Insert poem & Ghandi refernce)~Blago
Meh. Unless some old lady screams about death panels and half of congress brings semi-automatic weapons, I don’t care. Sober, intelligent speeches about pressing social issues are SO boring.
Ooh! Do you think he might actually take off the Romulan ball-cloaking device and let us all seen them again like we did last summer? This could be good, people.
Those guys in the picture knew how to make scholiasm work.
Barry better not mention dinosaurs, or he’ll lose the Republican base.
V572625694: That’s cuz they all have multiple scholiasis.
If I were President! Oh, if I were President! I’d stand at that podium and light a big, fat cigar and I’d take out a handwritten list of the names of Senators and read them off. Then my secret police would go over to each of the Senators being named and march them right out the door, never to be heard from again until a video of them confessing to their crimes were shown on TV, without mention of where they were or what had happened to them.
Then I’d institute free meals for homeless cats and dogs throughout America.
That’s what I’d do if I were President. If I were President.
Peace… God bless…
Min: Not if he rides in on one. Like Jesus.
I admit it, Mr. Naugle. I am a Kenyan-born Muslin terrorist raised in a madrassah by illicitly gay married foster parents Pol Pot & Allen Ginsberg. Also you are handsome and smart and everybody loves you! Let’s snuggle, naugie-waugie, and you can touch my pee-pee, also.
Isn’t there a typo in your headline?
It should read, “since dinosaurs came to congress.”
That would make it circa 1970.
Who will be the Obama ‘invited guest’ in the gallery with Michelle–a death panel survivor, a future death panelist, the wife of the late Ted Kenndey perhaps?
Ooooh!!! Oooh!!! I hope he re-enacts that skit where he whips the white lady into getting an abortion. Talk about great television!
Well fuck maybe Hopey has finally discovered his inner Lyndon Johnson and won’t actually sell all the poor folks down the river.
Just once, I would like to see Obama step up to the pulpit, reach for his notecards ala Cleavon Little and proclaim ” “Excuse me while I whip this out.”
What is eight sevenths of an extra-terrestrial?
I remember Bill Clinton’s awesome sweeet health care speech in 1994 — I even commented to my neighbor the doctor, “Now they’re really gonna get things done.” Then we got universal health care and all lived happily ever after, the end.
what are the odds he challenges ol’ chuck grassley to a wrasslin’ match?
hobospacejunkie:
“Well fuck maybe Hopey has finally discovered his inner Lyndon Johnson”
Thank you. And no response (or just a weak one) on the Katrina anniversary & New Orleans in general. Jesus, what is going on in this administration?
Come here a minute: Isn’t really all just so amazing how much progress we’ve made since that time though. The young-uns, they just have it so good now, they don’t remember just how tough it used to be.
hobospacejunkie: Naugh. He’s going there to stab the Public Option in the face, to demonstrate that anyone who is against forcing Americans to buy insurance that won’t actually provide them with health care at a reasonable cost is just a freekin’ radical extremist.
Nerdalicious: busy preparing to kick Grassley in the balls, publicly, before a joint session of congress. One hopes.
ForTheTurnstiles: Obama should unveil his new marijuana legalization + taxation bill by lighting up a fat joint at the podium, having a leisurely toke, and putting it out on Assley’s forhead while calling him “jive turkey.”
Calling a joint session of Congress is a hella big gauntlet to throw down. Basically he either gets up there and backhands the lobbyist semen out of everyone’s mouths, and beats the white off their asses for good measure, and generally calls them out and humiliates them on live TV (making enemies for life if he does it right), or he walks out of there a two-year lame duck.
The citizens are pushing, both houses of Congress are wearing the same team jersey as him, and he kind of hinted at this during the election — there’s simply no excuse. And if he gets up there and dithers as part of a “clever strategy,” I give up, he’s officially smarter than God.
Let’s pray for Obama, because if he fucks this up he’s out in 2012, and Random Dupe X will have a twelve-year cocktail of total destruction and benign neglect to deal with.
How about 45 minutes of that race speech rejiggered for healthcare?
How about 45 fucking minutes of an adult speaking to this nation as such?
How about 45 awesomely delicious minutes of one side of the room sitting on their hands and asses in humiliation and for once it was the fucking Republicans?
C’mon, Barry, even Stephen Harper couldn’t screw this up any worse. Get on the horse and ride.
ForTheTurnstiles:
“busy preparing to kick Grassley in the balls, publicly, before a joint session of congress.”
Well, it does look promising on that front. The adminstration has been leaking all day 2 things: they have had it with the gleeful wanton backstabbers, when Hopey has been so accomodating & gentlemenly to these dicks. And they are dropping the public option for sure. I know he said this in the Inaugural address: that we need to grow up etc…but: You can’t be in bed with criminals who consciously wear out terminally ill patients with red tape so they die soon, so the insurance co.’s don’t have to pay for chemo & expensive cancer treatments, AND be a good guy. He must take a damn stand. That’s growing up. If anyone can remember this: there was a show on how medicaid is consciously causing red tape hassels for terminally ill children so they die and don’t have to pay. This wasn’t innuendo, they had flat out proof. Folks this is criminal & crimes against humanity period.
First he turns all the childrens soshalist on Tuesday, then he gets all of our elected officials in one room on Wednesday. What is the purpose behind this evil plot!
Which member of Congress will show up with a puppet-dummy of Malia hanging in effigy?
This is what it comes down to right now. The wizard of oz witch holds all the cards.(or is she the hanzel & gretel witch that cooks little lost children? Whichever) We are the majority, & that picture of dorian grey hag is running the show as of today. Read this & weep.
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/ezra-klein/2009/09/the_divisions_in_the_white_hou.html
Fantasy text of the President’s speech:
Madam Speaker, Mr. Vice President, respected representatives of the 111th Congress, good evening.
Medicare for all. That is the deal.
Thank you and goodnight.
DoctorCulturae:
Thank you for this wet dream fantasy! He would be the God of this country for 8 years if so. And thanks for what you said earlier :).
Nerdalicious: Jesus, that’s friggin depressing- the entire fate of health care and the health care of millions of people basically ride on Olympia Snow and/or Kent Conrad. World’s greatest deliberative body, my ass.
I think it’s time to use the ole “slip ‘em a micky/dead hooker” ploy if you know what I mean
Nerdalicious: You’re welcome. Still chuckling about “Great White Dope.” Expect to see that on t-shirts soon.
But please help me understand why even peeling off a solitary vote like Snowe becomes imperative. I know the Senate back-slappers are more conservative, but ugh. The pressure should be on them from their constituents to pass this, not WH pandering to them at this point. Seems counter-intuitive.
Nerdalicious: That would be sweet.
But what we’ll probably get is universal coverage with no competition for big contributors (Pharma and Insurance).
Then he’ll move on to his Energy Policy: Clean Coal and Nuclear
DoctorCulturae:
“Expect to see that on t-shirts soon.”
Ha Ha. If only :). You’re right, she shouldn’t be instrumental at all. Either should grassley, enzi, mcconnel the whole lot of them. He has handed these impossible hacks the monumental job of health reform, & has given away this incredible historical majority & thus his power. It should have never come down to this. This should have been his baby, that’s it. I don’t mean to sound like the opposition, but he should have knocked this out before the stimulus. It’s starting to look like trickle down Reaganomics to me. Make the rich people richer then it will trickle down to the little people. Ugh.
Hooray For Anything:
Ha ha. Yeah the Godfather. They have really dissed him publicly over and over. He’s been so respectful of them. It’s really shocking that they are such bottom feeders. Those hacks have to have some skeletons somewhere. This anti health reform campaign is obviously rovian. I’m waiting for Willie Horton to show up in some ad. We need to be just as tactical. When in Rome.
Average Citizen:
Yup, I bet you’re right. Irony today Pfizer got slapped with a record 2.3Billion fine for criminal activity. These are his best friends now. It is shameful. Public Option over. Then what about the 50 million?
He should walk in and sucker punch Inhofe, kick Lieberman where his balls used to be, and then slam Baucus’ face onto the desk. Then give his speech like nothing happened. Howard Dean would be in the back with his doctor bag to give Grassley a special injection for the grand finale.
DoctorCulturae: Yes, Yes, Yes! “That is the deal”, and then drops the mutha’fuckin’ mike right on the floor Chris Rock-style.
Dolmance: I haz laughter. Since so many of them think torture is all right, and all, this wouldn’t even be morally reprehensible. But, in my mind’s eye, we’d march their old asses out right out of the chambers and unto the capitol steps, coerce them to confess a crime, and then go all French Revolution on their sorry asses, Marie Antoinette-style.
DoctorCulturae: “Medicare for all. That is the deal.” - Win!
The Prez has to face up to the fact that ‘bipartisanship’ is an utter fantasy, and that the Republicans couldn’t care less about healthcare for people- They just want him to FAIL, so that douchebags like Rush Limpdick can stand up in 2012 and say “we told you he’d get nuttin’ done”.
Time to (politely) tell them, and their mendacious media claque, to go fook themselves, then introduce a Government Healthcare Scheme. Let the Wingnuts wail - The People would rise behind him, and his falling approval rating arrow would turn up, bust through the roof of the Oval Office and wouldn’t stop until it hit Mars.
DoctorCulturae
“Time to (politely) tell them, and their mendacious media claque, to go fook themselves, then introduce a Government Healthcare Scheme.” Below is an Exert from an article posted 09/02/09 on The UK National Health Care System - Similiar articles from Canada.
“Forecasting death is an inexact science,”they say. Patients are being diagnosed as being close to death “without regard to the fact that the diagnosis could be wrong.
“As a result a national wave of discontent is building up, as family and friends witness the denial of fluids and food to patients.”
The warning comes just a week after a report by the Patients Association estimated that up to one million patients had received poor or cruel care on the NHS….. Dr Hargreaves said that this depended, however, on constant assessment of a patient’s condition.
He added that some patients were being “wrongly” put on the pathway, which created a “self-fulfilling prophecy” that they would die.
He said: “I have been practising palliative medicine for more than 20 years and I am getting more concerned about this “death pathway” that is coming in.
“It is supposed to let people die with dignity but it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/6127514/Sentenced-to-death-on-the-NHS.html
on2u: Go the fuck away, already.
on2u:
Isn’t there a town joke you need to be at soon, Laroucheite? Stephen Hawking said he wouldn’t even be alive today if it wasn’t for the “socialized” medicine in the UK. Oh, and the next time you want to protest “government intervention & takeovers”, don’t go to the damn post office & leave poor sick people alone. Witness the cleaned out broom closets a good samaratan Dr. in the US has had to empty, to give bald dying cancer patients free chemo a fucking chance to maybe live one more day.
http://www.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/08/18/chemo.closet/
This man will go to heaven. You people? Not so much. Jesus is watching, right wing hypocrites.
Ok, here is the watered down s**t bill we will have shoved down our throats in the drama speech next week: insurance companies are god & will own the world even more, even after the 2.3Billion record fine they incurred yesterday FOR CRIMINAL CHARGES. Insurance Co.’s will be watched & monitored to see if they are good little girls and boys for many many years. And if they are bad they will get spanked with bad public medicare option SOME DAY FAR FAR IN THE FUTURE when another crazed rethuglican is President, for being so very very bad. Yeah, just like the invisible caps they put on bank executives vulgar pay that really don’t exist at all. The fox will be put in the hen house. Instead of eating chickens it will be sick poor children & said cancer patients in above post. Oh, & the wizard of oz witch is apparantly the new Prez of the US. If they have the nerve to name this nonbill after Ted Kennedy the Kennedy Family should say: Thanks but no thanks, our father, brother, uncle would never have sponsered this bill. And quit making jokes about special education children on Jay Leno. PS: I wish for the Teddy Roosevelt smackdown too, but it won’t happen. Above will be the bill. Anderson Cooper said yesterday, also, won’t the rethuglicans see this as a victory & that they have won this battle? Yes they do. I’m looking at the possible pool of new Dems for 2012. I’m done.
Your new president:
http://www1.cuny.edu/portal_ur/content/womens_leadership/exhibit/women_politics5.html
About said new bill: Have you ever seen a rich person find loop holes in tax laws, snickering as they do it? Can you imagine these insurance snakes loop holing this new bill to death, to have business as usual and then some? By the time it’s time for them to get slammed for bill violations, there will be another criminal rethuglican prez in office. There will never be a public option, no matter what the insurance violations. What a f*****g joke.
Your new president, mount olympia face, your new health reform insurance company orgasm bill: Read it & weep:
http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/09/02/health.care.compromise/index.html
We are about to see the President of the United States bend over for the insurance monopoly. If that doesn’t set off a shitstorm among his base, it’s over, for real.
yardley:
He’ll just give the Inaugural “everybody needs to grow up speech”, which was creepy to begin with. It is he who needs to take a damn stand and grow up, not poor sick people. And he needs to stop blaming this fail on the media, I’m sick of those emails from the administration. The progressive blog are in shock. They got this guy elected. Them & frightened screaming masses running to the polls like something out of a godzilla movie because of the 3 horrors: grumps mccain, the great white dope palin, and laser eyes wax figure mrs grumps.
Greetings from Southern California, where government (who can’t do anything right, right Michael Steele) is saving houses and lives.
http://marmel.com/2009/09/hating-our-government-until-we-need-it/