Wonkette
Evil Drudge Report slave Andrew Breitbart, creator of one of the Internet’s best comedy websites, has been goin’ all “Meghan McCain” on the Twitter today, since the “actual lion loose in the Senate” died. He thinks that Ted Kennedy is a poop monster! True. But at least he gave children basic health insurance. [Twitter, Think Progress]
Easily winner of douche of the day. Kennedy did much good and one horrible thing. Bush did almost nothing good, save for a few million thrown at Africa as an afterthought.
I made the mistake of reading comments at WaPo too. There is no hope for us. Unless the pig aids really kills all the bitterz.
I love big Andy. It takes talent to run a site all about Hollywood that’s really the least entertaining site on the net.
Really, he just seems like that neighbor you had at some point who thinks he’s cool enough to hang with you and your friends. He comes out on his back porch wearing board shorts when you have girls over out on yours and tries making small talk, all the while you can hear Creed coming from his kitchen and he looks like he’s sweating scotch.
The Ernst Röhm of the neocon haters Andrew Buttboy will be little remembered in 20 years. Ted Kennedy will be remembered for centuries.
I wanna know who thought the bitters how to write in the internets? They come off all illiterate lunes on t.v. but then they are able to write hateful gibberish on the internets.
i’m not entirely sure why this gentleman is getting any kind of attention? he has no style, no sense of rhythm, no obvious language skills and nothing particularly interesting to say. also, he is rather portly.
next.
C’mon people, let’s not descend to his level. Giving him the benefit of the doubt, I’m sure Andrew Breitbart isn’t really a scat fetishist.
OK, it is obvious that he is a boorish lout who can type 140 characters at a time but who the fuck is Andrew Breitbart to get such coverage?
Is any poorly socialized vulgarian worthy with a Twitter account worthy of notice these days?
donner_froh: yup.
Yeah, Breitbart’s really concerned about Mary Jo Kopechne, since he coulda had a shot with her back in 1964. Those hundred thousand plus Iraqis that his buddy Dubya killed, though, wouldn’t have fucked him in a million years.
It’s difficult to even find the snark button while encountering such an ASSFLAKE.
still waiting for snowbilly grifter to twat about this.
I am sure Andy feels the same way about Laura Bush considering she mowed down a boyfriend with her car.
Oh, I guess we’ll have to wait till she throws off the ole mortal coil before Andy pipes up about that. I wonder if we’ll still have Twitter around when that happens.
It was O-Bar, not Au Bar. I guess this guy has never been to Palm Beach, which means he’s on the catching end of the Republican party. That makes me feel better.
hobospacejunkie: chascates: Hawaiiexpat:
Well, what else would you expect from Scat Sludge’s bitch, hmmm?
He really got me with the Twitter account hack bit. I’d shake his hand but I’m afraid at the last minute he’d jerk it away and run his fingers carelessly through his hair. Fool me once Andrew Breitbart…
If anyone has ever seen Andrew Breitbart on TV (he’s been on Maher’s show among others,) he is one of the nastiest, most loathsome, execrable, arrogant, smarmy, wrong-headed, self-absorbed, unintelligent, smirking piles of of baboon excrement any woman ever had the misfortune of pushing out of her birth canal. He’s so unlikable you wonder how his own children can stand the sight of him.
When Andrew Breitbart sees four of his siblings assassinated or die in plane crashes at a young age and another institutionalized for life because his father ordered her lobotomized and the doctors botched the surgery, guides his own son through a bout with cancer that cost the kid his leg at the age of 12, sees one nephew die of an overdose and another die in a plane crash and another die skiing into a tree, survives a plane crash of his own that kills two others on the plane and leaves him in traction for months, walks a number of his nieces down the aisle because their fathers are too, um, dead to do it, sees his first wife descend into alcoholism, serves his country as a senator for over forty years, pushes for universal health care for his fellow citizens for nearly that entire time, and does all of this while living with the burden of having a last name he did not ask to be born with, then Breitbart can twat nonsense to his heart’s content. Until then he should STFU.
Yeah, Teddy did wrong plenty of times. But in terms of psychological costs, he paid for it and more.
If I knew where Breitbart’s house was (we both live in L.A.) I’d be over there right now pouring gasoline and lighting a match.
Sorry for the rant, fellow wonketeers. Having lived in Boston I’m usually annoyed by Kennedy family hagiography, but Andrew Breitbart is a particular thorn in my side. He’s not one millionth the human being that Teddy Kennedy was and never will be.
What is one more conservative asshole at this point?
Jokes about someone that died is a lot easier work than actually coming up with actual working policies or ideas.
If my memory serves me correctly, I recall Breitbart whining about how no one in Hollywood wants to hire him. Of course, that has to be a liberal conspiracy as it certainly could not be the lack of class he is enjoying wallowing in.
imissopus:
“[Andrew Breitbart]’s so unlikable you wonder how his own children can stand the sight of him.”
I suspect Ritalin & Thorazine flavoured Flintstones vitamins have something to do with that…
How does Burntbarf get away with saying someone else is a big ass, anyway? I’ve seen him, and his tookis ain’t too little either.
imissopus: Well said.
http://twitter.com/andrewbreitbart/status/3565468585
Beerfart is without a doubt the best name for this pasty stale cheese in the Seerah Palin/Glen Beck/Matt Drudge sandwich.
Attack of the pasty white men with soft fingers and major feelings of scorn and betrayal by the outside world. I wish these bastards would just play Fallout 3 or something instead and channel their pointless white rage into that instead of bothering the rest of the world with such amazingly rank stupidity.
yo fuck THIS guy
I can haz barf bag?
Breitbart, who describes himself as “Matt Drudge’s bitch”,[7] links to other news wire sources.
Say no more.
Guys like this give Twitter a bad name.
Now that we can “retweet” tweets he will be the laughing stock of twitter via retweeting tweets.
Ken Layne’s in memoriam for Jesse Helms is Swiftian compared to this.
& so it is, Democrats are even tactful when they’re being dismissive, apparently. & GOPERS are anything but… whenever.
I guess we really are two different kinds.
Who is this Breitbart fellow? Anita Cocktail?
When your real claim to fame is being Orson Bean’s son-in-law you have to over-compensate just a tad so that you’re not overshadowed by Tony Orlando’s cousin’s chiropodist.
tootsieroll: Sure, this miserable ass clown is saying really nauseating things about an American political icon while his body is still warm and millions of Americans are grieving but; “you can hear Creed coming from his kitchen”, ouch, .. that’s just mean man.
um,.. Marco
Twatter is the perfect medium for passively aggressive douchenozzles who can’t stretch their prose over 140 charac
From the size of his fat ass, I doubt Breitbart will close his mouth for anyone’s death…especially if there is pie nearby…
It takes a lot to make Sarah Palin look like the rational member of the far right. Mr. Breitbart, I salute you!
I think he’s a really awesome example of Christian values. Go, Beerfart!
http://marmel.com/2009/08/if-youre-judging-ted-kennedy-youre-judging-laura-bush-too-remember-that/
I’m just saying.
mephistopheles jefferson: As a registered Pitcher ™ I think I speak for the entire gay community, in and out of the closet, Conservative and Liberal alike, when I say: “I would not fuck him with yo’ dick, good sir”.
What a classy individual, this Breitbart. He rages against Kennedy in a way usually reserved for fifteen-year-olds who have just gotten kicked out of their Unreal Tournament “clan” and go on Livejournal to talk about what awful people all the other members were.
He IS fifteen, right? Otherwise, this is kind of more sad than funny.
Well, no, I take that back. I’ve never seen anyone have a meltdown on Twitter before, so that is kind of funny. Never mind.
Wait,imissopus: Wait, what? This ill-conceived creature has reproduced, and multiple times no less?!
BTW, “Laura Bush killed a guy”, tambien, also.
Boo Fuckin’ Hoo. Another whiney republican rube upset that Kennedy has an actual legacy, instead of a padded crotch in a rented flight suit like Georgie Bush.
I mean, Ted Kennedy’s not a bona fide traitor against America like Robert Novak, so I can see how this “Breitbart” has a little bit of corpse envy here. But did he really think anyone expected anything but pure mindless bile to spew from his ignorant mouth? He’s a fucking loser in the loser party. (FYI, “Breitbart”, that means the rest of us just assume you are mentally retarded, since you are not rich.)
Little pissypants really hates him, not because of Mary Jo Kopechne, whose name this “Breitbart” probably cannot pronounce, but because Old Teddy voted against their little masturbatory War Of Lies. Because, if it’s the car accident that makes him so repulsive, then I guess it’s OK for me to spit in Laura “Teenage Vehicular Killer” Bush’s face the next time I see her, yeah?
Have fun in your irrelevant party for the next 20-odd years, “Breitbart”. Ted Kennedy will still be famous and you’ll still be a little tiny poor nobody, furiously twattering on the internets.
LoweredPeninsula: Jinx. Also: Laura Bush did, in fact, kill a guy! With a car!
hobospacejunkie: You know it’s funny you should bring up the whole Bush throwing money at Africa thing cause ACTUALLY he didn’t. He withheld funding from any organization that went to Africa to teach safe sex. He pushed absitence only education, which doesn’t work, just ask the number of Palins who’ve been knocked up/conveived/knocked someone up out of wedlock (if you’re counting it’s 5 - Todd Sarah Track Bristol Tripp). So REALLY what George Bush did was massively increase the number of people who are infected with AIDS in Africa. But at least he gave all the money he saved by doing that to Africans for drugs to keep them alive longer. So they can, you know, give more people AIDS.
I hear Queen Pegs, our “digital Dorothy Parker,” is organizing the new Creative Twittering Program at Bob Jones University. I see a potential student.
If you really want to look stupid, make a comment on Twitter…
imissopus: Yeah, I’m sure this Breitbart guy is the sack of loose shit you all say he is, but I just can’t jump on the “Ted Kennedy was a wonderful human being” bandwagon.
1. Saw his 1st wife descend into alcoholism. You reckon he had nothing to do with that?
2. Served his country for 40 years as a Senator. Puts him right up there with Chuck Grassley, Joe Lieberman and Larry Craig. Hell, I’d take the job if it was offered to me, and not whine about what a sacrifice it is. It’s a cushy, well-paid position and a sign of his privilege, not his dedication.
3. Great legislator. So was LBJ, and look what a scumbag he was. OJ Simpson was a great running back, but that doesn’t mean he’s a great human being.
4. Fought for health care. And lost. A few incremental victories,but still. Also, fought against wind energy because it interviewed with the pristine view from his family estate. Politically, I guess, he was usually on our side, but if he was a complete conservative he wouldn’t have kept getting elected in Massachusetts. I’m with the right wingers in their estimate of him as a “limousine liberal.” He does not come from the same social class as I do and I never really felt he was fighting for me. From 2000 to 2008, when we were saying that “no Democrats have any balls,” that included Teddy.
5. Had tremendous personal tragedy in his life. I’ll grant you this one, the Kennedy’s have definitely have had more than their fair share of trouble, but what organized crime family doesn’t? They lived by the gun, and they died by the gun.
In any event, he lived a long, prosperous and sexually active life. He will have a certain place in history, which will include both his legislative record and Chapaquiddick. So be it.
GWBush reached across party lines?
HipHopOpotamus: Hey, hey, didn’t you get the memo? I atoned and all is forgiven.
Besides, I would NEVER say anything nice about Dubya.
gurukalehuru: I don’t think it’s fair to blame her alcoholism on him — bad genes most likely, plus her own issues. But you forgot annulling his 23-yr marriage to Joan which produced their 3 kids so he could marry a younger model, so I guess it all evens out.
Anybody else seeing a web page as scrambled and distorted as Brietbarts morals?
JamesMichaelCurley: Yes, I too awoke to a certain screen barf that wasn’t there when I went to bed. I’m sure Firefox developed a heretofore nonexistent incompatibility with Wonkette overnight.
New Wave Phlebotomist: Not just Firefox, I’m running IE8 at home and IE7 at work and get the same results. I think Newell caught some kind of wingnut virus at that town brawl he attended.
I do not read twitter- I am just not going there. It is a piece of technology that is better ignored. I do not know this guy and don’t want to- there are enough real stupid disgusting people in actual physical proximity.
I am sorry that Senator Kennedy will not lie in state here in DC but at some future time, I will visit Arlington again.
Marco: Hey, dood! Wassup! D’yu call me? Hey, those chicks are hot. Ya grillin’?
imissopus: Ted Kennedy is far from the only citizen with personal tragedy in his life, or even the only one who was able to make something of his life afterward. Heck, I’d wager he’s not even the only Senator with such a harsh background and family life. The only reason anybody knows any of it is that his last name is “Kennedy.” Save your perverse knowledge of the man’s private life for the water cooler the day after yet another basic cable biography/eulogy is aired (sponsored by the latest penis pill, no doubt).
People around here didn’t seem to get anywhere near as worked up about Sotomayor’s personal tragedies and triumphs when she was smeared (defensive, yes, but not to this degree), but of course the all-important Boomers didn’t see her brothers get shot on television.
Y’all are getting annoyed with Nihilist beating the Benazir Bhutto dead horse? I’m tired of every fucking November the story of “ZOMG, John Kennedy Still Dead!” making it above the fold while Boomers masturbate furiously over where they were and what they were doing (probably also masturbating furiously) when they “heard the news.” And from the way you were able to rattle off that grocery list of “Kenney Family Secrets!” as if you were reading them straight from the National Enquirer in a grocery store check-out shows that you’re a fervent participant in such idol worship.
Garfield and McKinley are still dead, too. Where’s the love?
Did you know we actually used to fucking spend half-dollars in this country until they put JFK’s face on the damned coin? Now we have to lug around five pounds of quarters when we need to do laundry because it’s a sin to spend the graven image of the Patron Saint of Boomers.
Strange to think, but for a guy who is soooooo apparently awful like Ted Kennedy one would think Andy would be doing cartwheels in utter glee.
I used to think I was angry and miserable, till I met conservatives like Andy.
Hahaha, that fat angry alcoholic is pissed that there were no week long tributes to the dead tools Tony Snow and Novak. Ted will always be a legend, Snow and Novak will be forgotten assholes.
HipHopOpotamus: Oh now come on, Anita made a funny later in the day and all has been forgiven.
gurukalehuru: 2. Served his country for 40 years as a Senator. Puts him right up there with Chuck Grassley, Joe Lieberman and Larry Craig. Hell, I’d take the job if it was offered to me, and not whine about what a sacrifice it is. It’s a cushy, well-paid position and a sign of his privilege, not his dedication.
Lay off those angostura bitters in your cheap rail vodka martini, and get some facts straight. Lieberman, Grassley and Craig never served 40 years. Craig has no legislative achievements to speak of. Grassley is a turd whose only issue was keeping farm subsidies intact. As for the Senate being a “cushy, well-paid” position, what a lot of bull. Maybe it is for Kay Bailey Hutchinson who shows up, fixes her hair and rubber stamps whatever the party central tell her, but not so for Teddy. I’ve worked on legislation on behalf of assorted “good guy” groups, and Teddy was one of the few Senators who worked well into the night, weekends. He wrote, he read, he argued, he visited the opposition, he made things work. This man put in 70 hour weeks, and he was still always nice to everyone he ran into. Ask any of the security guards, pages, janitors, or any of the “little” people who are often ignored by the powerful and the mighty, and they’ll tell you that Senator Kennedy always remembered them, their names, the names of their kids. Yeah, that may mean squat to nihilists and dickwads, but it doesn’t to a lot of people, even some of us who can snark with the best of them.
Oh, and if after working a 70 hour week, he wanted to go home to a fancy schmancy “compound” in Martha’s Vineyard and get a pristine view free of some windmills, I say good for him. Oh, and by the way, that WSJ right-wing,crapola,anti-green,screed on how Kennedy was a hypocrite because he didn’t want windmills off the coast of Nantucket is so full of crap, you couldn’t wipe your arse with it. The truth is that Kennedy was fine with the plan at first, until Walter Cronkite, a full time resident of Martha’s Vineyard, begged him to reconsider, as did virtually every other resident. I’m sorry, but you just don’t say “no” to Cronkite. And Cronkite had a point. Nantucket Sound is just too darn beautiful to mess with. Go check it out. Its not just for rich folk. I wouldn’t want 100 400 ft high wind turbines off the coast of Nantucket either. There are plenty of butt ugly, over-developed beaches with even uglier skyscrapers which would aesthetically benefit from a windfarm 5 miles off the coast.
FINALLY! I made up a Farewell Ted Kennedy Drinking Game (I thought it’s what he would have wanted) and so far the only thing that hadn’t happened yet was seeing the rapist Kennedy mentioned!!!!! Breitbart WIN!!!!
The premise of Andy’s site is that Real AmericansTM have to take back Hollywood from the Jews.
He foments anti-Semitism by repeatedly asserting that the huge Christian majority in the US is oppressed and smeared by the liberal Jews who run Hollywood specifically to bring down America. His audience loves it.
It’s that simple and that ugly.
Oh, and here’s my drinking game, in case anyone wants to keep playing. I’m pretty hungover.
1. When anyone says, “Lion in Winter,” “Lion of the Senate” or any other lion metaphor, take three gulps of beer.
2. Whenever they show another Kennedy brother while talking about Ted, have a shot of good whiskey.
3. If they bring up the rapist Kennedy, I forget his name, take two shots.
4. If they compare him to Michael Jackson, Walter Cronkite, or anyone else who has been called to heaven as part of this summer’s Celebrity Rapture, take three shots.
5. If Jello Biafra is quoted, drink the whole bottle.
6. If…scuse me…when anyone says the words “Kopechne” or “Chapaquidik” (no I can’t spell those words and I’m not googling them), hop in the car and drive to Massachusetts to pick up another 12-pack.
7. If they pass healthcare, ANOTHER ROUND FOR AWHL MAIY FRIENDSSSSS…
What a horrible, horrible adipose semblance of a homo sapiens.
I guess Andrew’s plan of controlling the political slant of the content coming out of Hollywood is progressing slower than expected. He’s definitely off his game. I mean, c’mon, RFK probably fucked Marilyn too, but no mention? Weak.
Anita Cocktail: I was not aware that being self-righteous over how long you posted here somehow did not make you a walking mistake.
Also, I go by the cemetary everyday. I am sure there is a smug fool buried there somewhere, which means I can never forgive you and regret you were not banned with the Paultards and other human filth. Since that appears to be how you function, I am sure you understand.
Personal opinion: Maxene was the least talented of the Andrews Sisters. Also, Ted Kennedy.
Andy who?
Who in the hell is this BeerButt character anyway. According to Imissopus, he’s practically a mass murderer, with his own family. No wonder this asswipe is so bitterz. He could at least wait until Teddy is planted before he opens his chancreous pie-hole.
glamourdammerung: Give it up, douche. I’m not intimidated by you and your personal attacks are not going to make me run away and cry. You know nothing about how I function, but have hopped up on your holier-than-thou perch because I dared to suggest that your icon of liberality might have made mistakes — terrible ones, and therefore (gasp!) was human.
LoweredPeninsula: I saw him on TV once bitching about something they were doing at his kids’ school in Westwood that he considered unforgivably PC, so yes he has reproduced.
gurukalehuru: Guppy06: Hmmm, maybe you should go re-read the end of my post, specifically the part where I said I’m usually annoyed by Kennedy family hagiography. I had a couple of college roommates from Cape Cod and southern MA and believe me, there’s no worse mindless devotion to the Kennedys than liberal Irish Catholics from that area (apologies to any liberal Irish Catholics reading this, it’s just an opinion.)
I never said Teddy was a saint. Like many people, especially those who move in the circles he moved in, he could be both a warm-hearted champion of the people and an utterly monstrous asshole at the same time. He killed a woman through gross negligence and that will stain his reputation forever. It’s a paradox, I know, but try to force your tiny lizard brains to understand that most people behave in extremely contradictory ways throughout their lives. Whatever the circumstances of how he got to the Senate, the fact is he was there for 47 years and has a long record of both legislative defeats and victories to show for it. And perhaps you also missed the part where I said it’s not his fault he was born with the last name…at least he lived up to it. Dubya had to live up to the last name of Bush and I’d argue he did far more harm to this country in eight years than Teddy did in 50.
My post was a response to Breitbart’s vicious and low attacks and was more about what an unaccomplished twatwaffle that guy is. You guys should try to find some video of him; the rage and disgust for anything to the political left of, say, Cheney is palpable and irrational and it pisses me off.
Oh and guppy, I’m 35, which hardly qualifies me for Boomer status, though you seemed to think otherwise. All that shit I wrote about Kennedy has been reported ad nauseum over the years, I didn’t pick it up watching A&E…just a lifetime of reading newspapers and paying fucking attention to the world. You should try it so that next time you want to debate me, you’ll know what you’re talking about.
Anita Cocktail: What is the matter? Is it so terrible to you that I acted like you that you feel the need to carry on with me?
Maybe that should tell you something about your behaviour yesterday.
I just visited his site and for fucksake, Victoria Jackson posts there!!! Damn!!
Why didn’t you warn me? Fucker…
…And I’m baking out of the funny I tried to make that reasserted a day-old feud. My bad - God.
Dear Mr. BeerBong or whatever your name is:
There’s a fine line between being principled opposition and just being a dick
Love, God
Breitbart: AIPAC Israel-first Megaphone