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Getting tired of THIS STUFF, aren’t you? Well, suck it up. At this point, we want to pressure Obama and Congress to incorporate as much rationing and Death Paneling as possible into a final health care bill, with very loose criteria. You’re eligible for Medicare, human? KILL. This will be the single determining criterion. It will save us so much money, for sexy parties. So along with the old racist up top, we will now present a few other candidates for Death Panels, from a recent town hall protest in Dallas. Thank you to operative “Lisa” for these freaking gross images.

This guy’s not quite old enough, but if Zeke Emanuel just spray-paints his hair white, no one will know/care. The first rule of Death Panels is that if you complain about Death Panels… then you go before the Death Panels. (Also, ~15% chance that this is a lady.)

Some vandal should have gone up to this bag lady and written on the sign over her bum-bum, “…means Yes!” JUST KIDDING — RAPE IS SO AWFUL! (But still.)

Yeah, deal with Medicare and Medicaid, and THEN deal with that completely separate issue of health care. (And lady: it’s called e-mail.)

You’re too old to behave like this, friend.


While we’re on the topic of Today’s Olds, let’s keep something in mind: very little of this has to do with the “greatest generation.” They are, for the most part, quite dead. Today’s Olds are those who were too young to fight in World War II/Korea or too old to fight in Vietnam. So if we’re going to get these Death Panels up and running, now’s our window of opportunity to do it without feeling guilty!

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