Wonkette
There’s basically no national or ethnic group you can make fun of these days without being accused of racism, but a few are considered mildly less offensive than others. For example, you can always call Scots “stabby,” because they love to stab each other for sport, and Belgians are usually fair game, too, due to their treacherousness and love of mayonnaise. But as Paul Krugman discovered last week, you do not get away with insulting the Swiss.
In a column on health care, he barfed out this evil phrase, which was an offense to upstanding Swiss people everywhere: “lederhosen-wearing holey-cheese eaters”.
This is what started the reprehensible anti-Swiss pogroms of 2009, which have come to a swift end now that the all-powerful Krugman has retracted.
Eeeee ahm oofeendeed
It’s all fun and games until you’re found in an alley with fifty army knives in your back, each stabbing with a different tool. And you know that’s gotta hurt.
Jeeze, I thought white folks were the last people that could be made fun of… I guess we’ll have to stick to my 9th grade science teacher’s rule: You can ONLY tell jokes about long extinct cultures, like ‘How many Hittites does it take to screw in a lightbulb?’.
The Swiss will fucking cut you, with several knives in one convenient portable package!
TGY: The peculiar thing is they kept asking “What’s the frequency Kenneth?”
Egads…thinking about corkscrews.
When Krugman went to the ATM last week, it informed him that his funds had 72 hours to live, unless he made a retraction. Krugman’s next article, “Vive La Tolberone!” is forthcoming.
Does this meam we will get better cheaper health care and a secret bank account that you can use to avoid paying taxes? Sweet!
I thought the Swiss were neutrals on everything.
I don’t see why anything Krugy would say could go beyond a Taupe Alert for them.
plowman: Ati-hittite.
I smear mustard on swiss all the time, does this mean I have to stop doing that?
Jeez, Krugman, everyone knows it’s those funny-talking hillbillies in Bavaria who wear lederhosen & dirndls.
They were thinking of using their navy to invade, but then thought better of it. The Swiss are, after all, a civilized people, and accept your apology, Krugster.
fifty army knives in your back, each stabbing with a different tool
Sounds like liberal European “end of knife” counseling.
While we are finally voicing our contempt for the loathsome Swiss, where is the outrage and international condemnation of Patagonian’s national obsession with grannie porn? Hello, sheeple?
It was the Bavarians that complained, no doubt, after the article appeared on someone’s Google News alert for “lederhosen.” Bavaria is like the Deep South of Germany. Their Newt Gingrich has probably already twatted that Krugman is a Racist Jew.
The Swiss have nothing on my Liberty Pocket Knife and Freedom Water Bottle.
hobospacejunkie: And the mountain-goat riding Italians in the Dolomites. Don’t forget them. Sud Tirol and all.
That’s better than what the cheese-eating surrender monkeys, er, um, French folks get called.
Today, we are all “lederhosen-wearing holey-cheese eaters”.
I would have said wooden shoe sniffing yodel chumps.
“Let’s not call them anything, let’s just ignore them.”
Yo-mama-del-ay-hee-hoooooooooooooooooooo!
Beer and chocolate.
Better not fuck with the Belgians.
In Krugman’s defense. If the Swiss are going to complain, they shouldn’t stand around taking so many pictures like this…
WadISay: Costume party!!!1!
ManchuCandidate:
Neutral Alien: Your neutralness, it’s a beige alert.
Neutral President: If I don’t survive, tell my wife ‘hello’.
ManchuCandidate: Perfect FTW for use of Taupey.
The Swiss are all right, but those darned Albanians…
Krugman’s fatal error was to reference cheese. Americans may resent the Swiss for staying out of The Good War and for prancing around the Vatican in weird pantaloons, but their ain’t no way we are going to let Krugman get away with insulting fondue.
You should be ashamed of yourself, Krugman!
OK, so lederhosen are out. Are we still allowed to smear the Swiss with mentions of Jewish gold?
Did I miss the apology? All Krugman said was, “In my column last Monday, I made a joke about the Swiss that fell flat with some readers. Also, the Swiss don’t wear lederhosen.” He’s just stating the fact that some people didn’t like his joke about the Swiss. He didn’t say he apologizes to them or regrets saying it; he just mentions he said it.
That’s pretty much the most apologeticky apology you can make.
Should have been Taupe-Alert, I was just in amazement at all the Swiss Slurs…who knew Wonkettes harboured so much bile for the charming chocolate- loving, cuckoo-clock making , war-avoiding Volk?
Ausfahrt! Ausfahrt!! Ausfahrt!!!
Gute fahrt!
OK, look Wonkette: after all that anti-Twitter shit, y’all now have a fucking TWEET button and link. TRY FOR CONSISTENCY for the love of Plastic Jesus.
Hah, gonna make Ann Coulter a Deputy Assistant Subeditor next?
The Scots are only “stabby” because the English took their guns away.
Also, after seeing the new Tarantino picture, I think Nazis are still fair game.
Dirty fat Belgian Bastards!
Sonder Fahrt,
Fahrt ins blaue,
klein Fahrt,
Gross Fahrt,
ein fahrt,
schluss fahrt,
Schmutzig Fahrt,
Gute Fahrt!
I just threw up a little Swiss Miss in my mouf…
Limeylizzie: Try not to exhaust all the Swiss slurs in one comment, there, Limey, or we’ll be forced to go after the Brits next (again).
4tehlulz: win
Capitol Hillbilly: Haha, in today’s local fishwrap, somebody writes a letter to the editor cancelling his next summer’s golf vacation in Scotland on account of the Mahari thing. Take that, you bagpipe-blowing thistle suckers!
My grandfather was Swiss. On his behalf, and on behalf of all Americans of Swiss descent, I accept Mr. Krugman’s apology. Perhaps we can have a meeting at the White House over a Cardinal pilsner and some fondue.
Personally, I love a country that believes its troops need an emergency wine opener.
plowman: You probably even have to be careful with that — I’m sure some Hittite descendent will resent the implication that it would take more than one Hittite to screw in a light bulb and demand that you apoligize in a publication of national circulation for your slander of a long-dead people.
UNTRUE. I have an old Heidi book and Goatherd Peter is wearing lederhosen. The Swiss Guard wear stupid looking uniforms and their chocolate has nothing on the Belgians! their “neutrality” in WWII is a joke.
norbizness: Damn dirty neutrals!
Humpback: Hahaha, so true. einz quickly!! a fucking cork!! Ze opener NOW!!!
But kidding aside, lets make this clear, Krugman is a REVERSE RACIST!
ManchuCandidate: The Swiss *are* neutral on everything…except money. They are very pro-money, those Swiss. And Ricola.
the problem child: You do and I will gnaw you with the stubs of my blackened teeth, then I will talk of the weather .
They will melt your face off, it’s true.
Gnome fostering, Pope saving bastards can blow my Alpenhorn.
The Swedish wore lederhosen in “Trading Places.”
Limeylizzie: Cuckoo clocks are from the Schwartzwald, you sunlight deficient tosser.
Did I miss the column where he aplogized to France, too? Oh, right–they’re still fair game. Fuckez-you, Krugman.
Limeylizzie: touché
Get with it, Krugman. It’s only okay for the press to make fun of the black folk. Because they, you know, have voodoo grandmas in the White House and fake birth certificates and are secretly Hitler.
Darkness: Darkness: Darkness: Actually the Chalet style is a Swiss invention, the original clocks are indeed from the Schwarzwald . My milky-white skin is a joy to behold naturlich.
I bet Arnold got pissed as hell! How dare Krugman soil the reputation of his birth-nation’s official garments! Seriously, associating the sacred clothing of rough, tough Austria with those whining, neutralist pacifist Swiss! Lederhosen are sacred in Austria, and are always worn by Austrians everwhere, all the time, under their clothes, Because much in the same fashion as the Mormons and their magic underwear, the lederhosen protect Austrians from harm.
Ari Fleischer was right, people need to watch what they say ESPECIALLY JEWS.
Johnny Zhivago: “Phlegms!”
Die Schweizer sind besonders.
Krugman’s just plain wrong. When I was in Switzerland, the one I picked up one night was wearing lederho-…um…never mind.
Its the lack of oxygen at those Alpine altitudes, I think that’s what messed Hitler up.
REEEEEEEEEEEEEE COLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
I guess this means he has to give back his Nobel Prize.
Still, his comment is more truthful than most made by Republicans about health care.
snideinplainsight: um… the German verb ‘Fahren’ means ‘to travel.’ It is pronounced ‘Fairen’ and has nothing to do with gas-passing. Sorry.
From the old Stan Freberg radio show, ca. 1960:
“Zazaloff? What kind of name is that?”
“Swiss. That way we don’t offend anybody.”
and later,
“Pedro? Is he Mexican?”
“No senorita; Sweess! That way we don’ ‘fend no-body.”
Enough!!!
It’s time to stop this liberal babble and invade Switzerland!
Darkness: It’s “Schwarzwald”, not “Schwartzwald”. Now back to my yodeling excercises.
Nice non-apology.
He left out so many insults.
Compact weapon-bearing, chocolate-smeared, ball-balancing fellows with big yodels and tiny tickers (i.e. watches).