DINGUSES  10:45 am August 18, 2009

Maryland Politician Proposes To Lady During ‘Mock Police Raid,’ Wastes Valuable Public Resources

by Jim Newell

I like sniffing buttsUnited States Senator Ben Cardin of Maryland has a nephew in politics! You knew this. But did you know that said nephew, state delegate Jon Cardin, is a tacky dingbat who should probably resign after diverting scarce police resources from MURDER INVESTIGATIONS to his dumb boat for the purpose of scaring his girlfriend into marrying him?

Slightly trashier than proposing on the Jaws ride at Universal Studios:

City police are investigating why on-duty marine and helicopter officers helped a Baltimore County state delegate propose to his girlfriend by pretending to raid a boat the couple were aboard, a department spokesman said Monday.

Officers boarded the boat, owned by a friend of Del. Jon S. Cardin, on Aug. 7 in the Inner Harbor. As the helicopter Foxtrot hovered overhead, adding to the sense of tension, one report says officers pretended to search the vessel and even had the woman thinking she was about to be handcuffed before the delegate got on one knee and proposed.

Megan Homer said “yes.”

Ha ha, he sure got you, Homer! You were scared as SHIT! *High fives*


Police said they are investigating what appears to be a misuse of police resources at a time when the budget-strapped department is begging for private donations to keep its horseback unit running and is immersed in investigating the latest violence at the Inner Harbor – a double shooting inside the Light Street Pavilion at Harborplace over the weekend. Residents and visitors have complained that police presence is thin at best.

Yeah… just never should’ve done this. Calling over teams of boat cops and helicopters to stage one of those kitschy, overdone proposals that can only end in insta-divorce, when the rest of the city doesn’t even have enough HORSES to chase the MURDERERS?

An Indecent Proposal for Md. Delegate? [NBC Washington]
Police-involved marriage proposal draws fire [Baltimore Sun]

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Clamps August 18, 2009 at 10:51 am

Is he even heterosexual? Why won’t he show us his long form marriage certificate?

patrickman August 18, 2009 at 10:52 am

ayo its Omar

Chickensmack August 18, 2009 at 10:53 am

What is the deal with all these Syracuse fans? Everyone’s an Orangeman these days.

oh, and “tacky dingbat” is already absorbed into Michelle Bachmann, just like “guano faucet” is synonymous with Ari Fleischer. Redo, plz.

queeraselvis v 2.0 August 18, 2009 at 10:54 am

[re=389087]Clamps[/re]: Thank you and OH PLEASE, GHEY. Also, alt-text FTW, Jim.

dum librul August 18, 2009 at 10:54 am

This reminds me of the time my boyfriend proposed to me in a bank during an elaborate hostage situation broadcast on the jumbotron during a Nationals game.

hobospacejunkie August 18, 2009 at 10:55 am

Should’ve gotten married in the backseat of a limo at the Little White Chapel in Las Vegas.

head58 August 18, 2009 at 10:55 am

Slightly trashier than proposing on the Jaws ride at Universal Studios

That’s the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard.

Little Miss Baltimore August 18, 2009 at 10:56 am

That’s how we roll in Charm City. The romance is all about the fear. Gosh I love this town.

Can O Whoopass August 18, 2009 at 10:56 am

The Orioles are having a bad, bad year.

snideinplainsight August 18, 2009 at 10:57 am

Awwww, geez, that’s so romantic!!

It would’a only been better if they’d tasered the happy couple afterwards. For authenticity.

snideinplainsight August 18, 2009 at 10:59 am

Yah it woulda been funnier if he had proposed during an Orioles win – she woulda known the whole thing was a setup.

Canmon (the Inadequate) August 18, 2009 at 11:01 am

Gob would have hired the hot cops.

TimeCubist August 18, 2009 at 11:01 am

I’m accepting private donations for my saddleback unit.

Uncertainty Vice-Principal August 18, 2009 at 11:01 am

Nothing says will you marry me like “you’re under arrest”.

I expect this to catch on.

Mumbletypeg August 18, 2009 at 11:04 am

He could have saved effort and $$ by foregoing this tired Miami Vice script and borrowing one of the Mounted Police steeds for a good old-fashioned “Prince Valiant” roleplay, bringing much-needed attention to that neglected, under-funded bastion of crime-fighting.

Decker August 18, 2009 at 11:05 am

Sounds like an episode of Arrested Development

TheNavOne August 18, 2009 at 11:05 am

But is it trashier than proposing on the Gary Oldman as Shelly Runyon in the Contender: The Ride?

widestanceromancer August 18, 2009 at 11:05 am

Will he take his ladybride to Gitmo for the wedding night stress position surprise?

Better American Than You August 18, 2009 at 11:06 am

Oh, I hope they had midgets! Midgets (especially when they are getting tasered) can bring hilarity to any major life decision.

Canuckledragger August 18, 2009 at 11:07 am

Hey! You make sniffing butts sound like a bad thing.

Don’t tell Mrs. Canuckledragger, because I sniff her butt all the time.

Uncertainty Vice-Principal August 18, 2009 at 11:07 am

Come to think of it, shouldn’t you be read your rights as part of a marriage proposal?


bfstevie August 18, 2009 at 11:11 am

Perhaps they had to use the helicopter, because the tiny clown car was busy.


June Cleaver 2.0 August 18, 2009 at 11:11 am

Stupid ass. Is August over yet?

BlueStateLibtard August 18, 2009 at 11:15 am

He should have had her arrested and then proposed during the body cavity search–just think how romantic that would have been!

Note to Megan Homer: Except a life of many unpleasant surprises with this nitwit.

mdotsota August 18, 2009 at 11:15 am

And meanwhile, the Major Crimes Unit is THISCLOSE to Marlo Stanfield and they want to kill the wiretap.

CorkPopper August 18, 2009 at 11:15 am

Oh, Megan. What marital bliss awaits you. Your life will be one long, live version of Punk’d, you do realize that, right?

Joshua Norton August 18, 2009 at 11:20 am

Tying her up and putting a gun to her head probably also had something to do with her to say “yes”.

I’m just wondering why the girlfriend didn’t think that getting raided by the cops didn’t seem to be that unusual.

Joshua Norton August 18, 2009 at 11:27 am

Ah, the fun and games they have to look forward to. Foreplay that involves live ammo and restraining devices. Babies crying. The crew from “Cops” on the front lawn.

The divorce lawyer on speed dial….

Good times.

Advocatus_Diaboli August 18, 2009 at 11:33 am

I wonder if Homer will still want to marry him after he resigns in disgrace.

Rukasu August 18, 2009 at 11:34 am

Meanwhile people are getting got all over Hamsterdam

norbizness August 18, 2009 at 11:42 am

Fuckin’ white people, man.

norbizness August 18, 2009 at 11:43 am

[re=389100]Can O Whoopass[/re]: WHEN is Brady Anderson going to GET ON TRACK?

Terry August 18, 2009 at 12:03 pm

The happy couple don’t have to bother paying for an announcement of the engagement in the Balto Sun. They might even make the front page rather than the stuffy old wedding/society pages.

Norbert August 18, 2009 at 12:08 pm

please take down his photo, I cannot deal

recharged95 August 18, 2009 at 12:17 pm

She better have said yes. Or I’d be pissed that my tax dollars to power that helicopter resulted in a lame no.

Then again, a NO == no kids and would giv eme hope that the future world would *definitely be a better place*.

Decker August 18, 2009 at 12:19 pm

[re=389104]Canmon (the Inadequate)[/re]: Quicker and better. Nice!

phalex August 18, 2009 at 12:30 pm

There’s never been a paper bag for idiotic, product-of-nepotism political creeps.

Deepthroat August 18, 2009 at 12:51 pm

And that’s why you never get on a boat with Delegate Dingus.

One Yield Regular August 18, 2009 at 12:54 pm

This was for a new John Waters movie, right? With the fiancee played by Jenny Sanford, right?

desertwind August 18, 2009 at 12:59 pm

[re=389094]hobospacejunkie[/re]: Ha hee! That is where I got married 18 years ago today. Not in the drive-thru. Please. It was a solemn and sacred occasion. And. It would’ve been too tacky to be sitting in the rusty Camry.

Lionel Hutz Esq. August 18, 2009 at 1:01 pm

Why weren’t these people hauled away for disturbing the peace?


When will these people get a beer with the President?

the problem child August 18, 2009 at 1:01 pm

Well, those horses eat a lot. No wonder they can’t afford them. They should try piggybacking each other instead.

kewlguy42069 August 18, 2009 at 1:20 pm

what the fuck Carcetti

Barrelhse August 18, 2009 at 1:22 pm

[re=389120]Canuckledragger[/re]: Not panties?

yellowdogdem August 18, 2009 at 1:25 pm

[re=389131]mdotsota[/re]: Is Marlo still causing trouble? At least Michael has moved up. He’s starring in “Gossip Girl” now.

Cheney Guevara August 18, 2009 at 2:21 pm

This happened on an episode of Sarah Silverman.

Fabuloso August 18, 2009 at 3:57 pm

Please be a lamb and put a (D) or an (R) behind his name so I can know how to react to this incident. Just a little help here please – outrage or awwwwww how cute? I don’t come here to form an opinion, it is your journalistic duty to tell me how to think. Gyaahhh!

Jukesgrrl August 18, 2009 at 7:25 pm

And the English practically had a revolution when Prince William landed a plane on his girlfriend’s parents’ lawn just to impress them. Just think if he had added sadism to the mix … then again, maybe they would have liked that … naw, they just like men dressed up as women.

gradgrind August 18, 2009 at 9:33 pm

[re=389103]snideinplainsight[/re]: Here in Balto we have a word for guys who wait for an Orioles win before proposing: “bachelors.”

StoneAge August 19, 2009 at 1:07 pm

[re=389098]Little Miss Baltimore[/re]: Is that what they call it? More like Harm City.

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