Wonkette
Michele Bachmann has sent out a comical fundraising letter to her violent dingbat fappery of a constituency titled, “Don’t let them Palinize me!” She claims that, “With Governor Palin taking a well-deserved step out of the spotlight, it appears that I may be absorbing even more of the liberals’ scorn.” So give her more money to… not absorb that scorn! But hey wait a minute, what exactly does “Palinize” mean? Michele Bachmann actually cites an Urban Dictionary definition at the end of her letter — but she doesn’t cite all of the Urban Dictionary definitions.
Here are the definitions Bachmann provides from “the” Urban Dictionary:
From the Urban Dictionary:
Palinize:
To smear or mock someone using falsehoods, baseless accusations or unsubstantiated character assassinations for the purpose of blocking them from achieving a goal.
To exaggerate the truth or lie by omission.
To attack a person for his or her conservative values by focusing an inordinate amount of attention on a single example of that person falling short (or being perceived as falling short) of the values they espouse.
Other, less passive Urban Dictionary definitions — as in, the agent does something terrible, rather than something terrible happens to the agent — include:
- To bluster, to speak without saying anything of substance.
- To flub a television interview.
- To Randomly repeat talking points regardless of the questions given to you.
- To avoid giving any substantial answer to a factual question, by means of cobbling together meaningless platitudes; to attempt to fool the listeners and distract their attention by pandering to their prejudices and using one’s charm or attractiveness. Inspired by the distinctive style of Alaska governor and former VP candidate Sarah Palin.
- When someone answers a question without any form of intelligence or foresight. In an attempt to divert from giving a correct answer and in the process sounding unintelligible.
- The act of firing people who divorce your family members.
- To use your publicly elected powers for evil.
- The ability of being able to point out Real America from Fake America
Bachmann: “Don’t Let Them Palinize Me!” [TPM]
She’s already been Bachmannized– isn’t that enough?
I no longer find these people funny or worthy of satire. They just scare me.
I think you need a good round of anal bleaching before you can be properly Palinized.
Maybe she’ll be simonized too!
Hasn’t there been a movement to attach Palin’s name to some horrible sex act a la Santorum yet? “Palinize” is too strong-sounding of a verb to use for non-sexual-deviant purposes.
I Palinized my underwear. Then I Dirty Bachmaned my neighbor.
I think she meant pelletized. But that actually makes a little sense so that can’t be it.
The real danger is in getting Santorumed.
Dont Palinize me bro!!!!!!
I think she’s talking about Todd. Do not Palinize me = “Do not defeat me in a snowmobile race”.
I thought she meant she didn’t want her insanity to be the basis for a porno film.
Bukkake Bachman?
Bachmann Humping Overdrive?
“But just as they did with Sarah Palin, the more I talk about the issues, the more they attack with below-the-belt personal hits.”
Kinky…
FEMA RE-EDUCATION CAMPS! ONE WORLD CURRENCY! SHOW US THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE!
I think Bachmann can Palinize herself without help from anyone else, thank you.
You know she really wants it. Our coy Michele is really thinking, “Bring it on! I’m the new Caribou Bach-bie!”
Smoke Filled Roommate: i prefer to be bachman-turner overdrived.
ManchuCandidate: Bachman Humping Overdrive. Thats funny. No, really, I like that, thats funny.
I think she’s got the second-to-last nailed.
Bachmenstruate (verb) - to make an idiot out of yourself and your political party on a monthly basis
Bachman Fever.
Bachman Fever.
Going out of my mind.
Out of my mind.
People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw urban dictionaries.
ManchuCandidate: “Bachmann Humping Overdrive?”
Wonkgasm. Pure Comedy Gold.
Never thought I’d see Urban Dictionary become a lightning rod for controversy like Wikipedia. Hmmm. Maybe the Republicans should set up an alternate universe “Rural Dictionary” where people define words like Palinize to describe being the victim of smear attacks, rather than the actions of the perpetrator which is the common currency here the the ‘hood.
Also (!) the second definition given by Bachman (”To exaggerate the truth or lie by omission.”) is from the anti-Palin use of the word as evidenced by the example, “I palinized my resume.”
Violent Dingbat Fappery is my new favorite band name.
Bach it 2 me baby let it all hang out.
Bach Nekked.
Michele does Meany-Apple-Ooze.
Oh wait, those are porny.
I’ll donate a bag of extra salty dicks to her campaign and maybe some salty balls.
To use your publicly elected powers for evil.
That’s Chenyfication. It lacks the requisite undertones of empty headed fappitude needed to qualify as a Palin related insult, IMHO.
also, could she have meant “palletized” as in stapled to a platform of rough boards and bound in multiple layers of shrink wrap (and if so..pics plz)
Bachmannizing (syn., accessorizing): the art of wearing tastefully appointed pantsuits, hand-picked by your definitely-not-gay, but runs a program to cure the homos husband (for realsies, kids!), and
Palinizing: (syn,. accessorizing): the art of sporting your Down syndrome baby on your hip while simultaneously blasting anyone with the audacity to mention ‘lil 21st chromosome.
Ha ha! Her son’s a commie.
Why is she absorbing more of the liberal’s porn? Is she watching Nailin Palin?
I saw Bachmann Palin Overdrive at a small ampitheater outside of Roanoke.
Takin’ care of business! Everyday! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
I say put ‘em both in the death cage and see who Palinizes who.
You would think that she’d want to be Palinized, what with all of the free clothes, trips, makeup ladies and babies to farm…
Kathryn.: dammit I was gonna say summat to that effect. Palinized = smeared with Santorum.
I thought to Palinize was to move in a spiral of increasingly whacked-out paranoid egocentric fantasies while thinking that your petty, ignorance-first parochialism qualified you for positions of great responsibility and continually deflecting legitimate criticism by twisting them into perceived slights that you manufacture overblown indignation about until the whole shebang collapses into a heap of stupid and rumormongering at a little-noticed picnic.
Which makes it a pretty damn succinct word.
A synonym for some of those definitions would be “Swift boating”. Kiss my ass, Repubes.
Hmm. Palinizing sounds like something DuPont invented n 1952.
BREAKING NEWS!!:
Guitar-god Les Paul has been TAKEN by n0Bama’s DEATH PANEL!!!!!1!!
Are YOU next on n0bAma’s enemy list???!1?>!
Darn tootin’.
Palin’s the only Alaskan I ever knew, butcha know, she seems a little Far-gone. Ya betcha. Are we sure that Palin wasn’t Bachmannized before she was Palinized?
I thought that “to palinize” meant: “To achieve far beyond any rational level because of your own incompetence. To be promoted for no reason what soever. To be given a great prize despite being clearly unworthy of any recognition what-so-ever.”
Example: Apparently the old, senile, cripple judge still thinks he has a shot because she tripped and fell four times on the ice, but somehow palinized the gold medal.
I’m pretty sure there are only three definitions of “bachmannize.”
1) To prevent intelligent conversation through a shrill whistle:
“We were discussing the Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance when that idiot bachmannized the conversation trying to call his dog.”
2) The willing be oblivious to reality.
“She must have been bachmannized, as she claimed she could reverse gravity and drove over the cliff.”
3) To arrange for a witch trial.
“Apparently she has been bachmannized, as she keeps calling the FBI and yelling at them to investigate her neighbors because they have painted their house pink.”
Bachmann was Palinized by her own son: http://dumpbachmann.blogspot.com/2009/07/scoop-dump-bachmann-scoop-bachmanns-son.html
I rather see her pulverized and mental-hospitalized. And then vaporized.
Sarah does indeed deserve to step out of the spotlight, if not off a cliff. Would that Bachmann followed suit. Not the Armani kind, though, because that would be immodest and a misuse of campaign funds.
In chess, to “Palinize” means the White Ice queen gives herself over to the big, strong, Black Knight.
I would Palinize both of them since they’re reasonably hot and I have my own definition.
I thought Palin was something one does around domestic terrorists.
I liked Bachmenstruation, but I’m afraid she does it more than once a month. However whenever she does it, it is a bloody mess.
Bachmanization is the willful act of mental self-isolation, resulting in various fanatickal fancies and farcical delusions.
If Bachman gets Palinized, I just want to watch.
I don’t Palinize little bunny rabbits!
What about: “To Palinize– to claim you had your 16 year old daughter’s baby so as not to anger the religious right.
(that rumor never gets old)
JadedDIssonance: Or, simply, having to navigate life’s path being Michelle Bachmann.
How does the Palinization process work? Does anyone have a recipe?
Carrie_Okie: I was going to say something along the lines of trying to talk after someone puts a dick in your mouth. Sounds come out, but no one can understand a fucking thing you’re saying (nor do they probably want to).
And I think Limbaugh just Palinized reality: http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2009/08/limbaugh-praises-palins-intellectual-heft-on-the-death-panels.php?ref=fpb
Who gave that fat bitch more oxy?
I’d like to Palinize Bachmann’s eyes with my penile Ides.
Wait, what?!
CrunchyKnee: Chris Hanson is at your door.
Extemporanus: I’d like to give her a lip plate. After awhile she’d look like the yipyip alien muppets and have to kill herself.
“Bachmannize” deserves a truly great definition. Something involving french kissing the dessicated corpse of a marmoset fetus while simulatenously being smeared with poo and Crisco.
CrunchyKnee: I love you..
Smoke Filled Roommate: Yippp-yip-yip-yip, muthafuckaaa!
I’m a Bachmann door?
From the Urban Dictionary:
Palinize:
To smear or mock someone using falsehoods, baseless accusations or unsubstantiated character assassinations for the purpose of blocking them from achieving a goal.
To exaggerate the truth or lie by omission.
To attack a person for his or her conservative values by focusing an inordinate amount of attention on a single example of that person falling short (or being perceived as falling short) of the values they espouse.
Well, she does do that to her opponents. All of it.
Oh, wait, are we to assume these are things done TO yon Anger Bear?
I’d like to impalinize both of them. On the same skewer.
I’d prefer Bachmann take that string of pearls she’s always wearing off her neck and slowly swallow them. Then reach around & gingerly pull them out her asshole. That would be my definition of Bachmannizing.
URBANDICTIONARY VOTE OFF, LIBTARDS GO THUMBS UP THE LIBTARD DEFS, THUMBS DOWN THE DOWN-SYNDROME LOVIN’ DEFS!!!
palinize
To pass on an extra 21st chromosome to your child because you are still reproducing well after you should be.
I palinized my child and now I’m the oldest mom at the Special Olympics…
If anyone is dumberer then Palin, it’s Bachmann. Christ, she makes Palin look like a beacon of normalcy. Bachmann would benefit with her own Triggy.
I’m still waiting for Michele Bachmann to be Dixie-Chicked.
Oh wait, I’m doomed to disappointment. You have to have some discernible talent, before you can be Dixie-Chicked.
Just as an addict’s reaction to anything is “I better do more,” an elected official’s is, “This means you better give me more money.” I used to think that no professional group could begin to rival the clergy’s obsession with money (it seems to be all they talk about), but the last decade in politics has me wondering.
I’m STILL trying to figure out if she fits in that category of, “the crazy ones are good in bed”, that my brother told me about years ago. You know, ’cause if she does, she’s got to be the best fuck on the planet…dear lord she’s whacky!
masterdebater:
If at some point in the near future I became completely deaf, I’d think about doing her (then I’d gouge my eyes out).
Quasi: I’ve been Chixie Dicked, and it was well worth the $50 I paid Bristol.
widget09: Do you have any Schwety Balls left?
There’s also the ever-popular “fail clown” : http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=fail+clown
-wink-
There’s worse yet! It would appear that the Representative has already thoroughly “Bachmannized” herself.
“To smear or mock someone using falsehoods, baseless accusations or unsubstantiated character assassinations for the purpose of blocking them from achieving a goal.
To exaggerate the truth or lie by omission.”
You mean, like, making up shit about death panels killing our retarded children and drooling olds in order to block healthcare reform legislation?
And obligatory Blingee for every Bachmann-related thread
http://blingee.com/blingee/view/90049135-BachHeil?offset=10&content=Glitter-Graphics&owner=czn939
GreatOldOnesParty: Is this is why Bachmann’s son Harrison ran away from this crazee bitch into First Comrade Herr Ayatolla n0baMa’s “Teach For America” RE-EDUCATION MADRASA???!!!!1!! HENNNNNNNNNNNGH???
Palinization: unsafe sex with Todd Palin!
Zhu Bajie
Palinization: to be impregnated by an Eskimo.
Oldskool: Boy, you must be desperate for a female! Just come back from a long cruise?
Zhu Bajie
Another Children’s Treasury of jim newell Insta-reactions To Sarah Palin’s Facebook feed. Good thing we have jim newell to blow the lid off Sarah Palin’s incomplete citation of Urban Dictionary. Who needs TPM or Matthew Yglesias when we have jim newell!
stratonike: You leave Scott Simon out of this! Doesn’t he have enough problems as a Cubs fan?
Palinized–when your first choice is sloppy seconds.
Palinized? How can that be any worse than being Bachmanized?
isn’t there an ex-president in WACO she can cheaney?