MUSTACHE RIDES  3:41 pm August 13, 2009

Is Barack Obama Also His Own Grandmother?

by Jim Newell

Do you trust this man?Joseph Farah, WorldNetDaily’s in-house Zeus, has blown Obama’s secret “real” birth history wide open today, on the conservative radio. He says we should stop referring to the so-called “relatives” of Barack Obama as mother, grandmother, father, wacky uncle, etc., because these people could be anyone. Barack Obama’s mother could be his grandmother! His grandmother could be Saddam Hussein! Saddam Hussein could be Trig! Trig could be (and is) King Tut?

When a standard psychopath asked Farah on the radio today about whether Obama’s “decision to briefly suspend his presidential campaign last year in order to visit his ailing grandmother was really a plot by Obama to get his hands on key documents in order to perpetrate a cover-up of his ineligibility,” Farah was like, I’LL ONE-UP YOU:

Well, Madelyn Dunham is a very interesting person. As you know, Barack … the … and I want to be careful when he identify people as “mother,” “father,” “grandmother,” and so forth because honestly I don’t think we know with any certainty whatsoever who those players are in Barack Obama’s life. And perhaps he doesn’t either. I suspect he does, but it’s possible he doesn’t know. And it is entirely within the realm of possibility that Madelyn Dunham was his mother and there’s a lot of circumstantial evidence to suggest that.”

Circumstantial evidence — the best kind. We hear that Joseph Farah is from HELL and his mother is Ramses II!

Farah: Obama’s Grandmother Was Really His Mother [Right Wing Watch]

 
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{ 79 comments }

shadowMark August 13, 2009 at 3:44 pm

Plucky bastard.

finallyhappy August 13, 2009 at 3:45 pm

Would it be wrong to hope this man has a massive stroke and dies, today?

ManchuCandidate August 13, 2009 at 3:45 pm

Hey, two can play at that game. I heard that Joe Farrah’s well known at the local animal shelter as Uncle Bad Touch.

El Pinche August 13, 2009 at 3:45 pm

Does conservative party have a gas leak?

snideinplainsight August 13, 2009 at 3:46 pm

Obama is really Trig’s mother!!!11! True fact!!

LittlePig August 13, 2009 at 3:46 pm

There’s a Grandpa Jones song in here somewhere.

Bearbloke August 13, 2009 at 3:46 pm

So Obama is the original Trig?

Joshua Norton August 13, 2009 at 3:47 pm

Words! Words! Words!
I’m so sick of words!
I get words all day through;
First from him, now from you!
Is that all you blighters can do?
Don’t talk of stars Burning above;
If you’re in love, Show me!….

helzapoppn August 13, 2009 at 3:47 pm

So now we can add Surrogacy to the Birther stew?

How ’bout Cloning?

El Pinche August 13, 2009 at 3:47 pm

[re=385635]finallyhappy[/re]: Not before he goes through a MARXIST OBAMACARE PANEL OF DEATH.

Speed Ball August 13, 2009 at 3:47 pm

THE ARISTOCRATS!

NoWireHangers August 13, 2009 at 3:49 pm

Are there any polls on exactly home many U.S. Americans have lost their fucking minds either to the Oily Taintz Birther Theorem or Nazi Socialist Healthcare Death Camp Syndrome? From inside the bell jar things look pretty crazy, but I’m wondering, how many sane people are still left?

It’s getting harder to laugh at this stuff. I want to start cracking skulls.

LittlePig August 13, 2009 at 3:49 pm

Wait a minute – shouldn’t that be Obama’s host mother was actually his supposed host’s mother?

The guy is a Reptile/Human hybrid after all.

JMP August 13, 2009 at 3:49 pm

And it is entirely within the realm of possibility that Joseph Farah does not have a mustache, but a shit-stain on his lip from his habit of licking cows’ assholes and there’s a lot of circumstantial evidence to suggest that.

One Yield Regular August 13, 2009 at 3:49 pm

[re=385648]Speed Ball[/re]: Win.

slappypaddy August 13, 2009 at 3:50 pm

he may be as careful as he likes identifying anyone as “mother,” “father,” “grandmother,” “crazy uncle in the attic,” and so forth. I’ll be as careful as i like and identify him as “punk-ass motherfucker.”

c’mon, throw down, punk-ass! throw down!

Woodwards Friend August 13, 2009 at 3:51 pm

I am actually Barack Obama and the man pretending to be Barack Obama in the White House is actually my aunt Francine Sorento. Well she was my aunt until she had the sex change back in ’82. You know the old saying if my aunt had balls…we she does and now she’s my uncle. After spending some time in Scientology she, I mean, he sucked off Larry Sinclair in a limo.

LittlePig August 13, 2009 at 3:53 pm

And just when you think Reptile/Human hybrid is too over the top even for wingnuts…

you find out otherwise

Some folks out there just ain’t quite right.

Herman the German August 13, 2009 at 3:53 pm

As the real author of “Mein Kampf” Obama is German of course.
His long version birth certificate is stored in a secret vault under the Führerhauptquartier in Berlin.
And his true mother is Eva Braun (!!!).

Also, as you Americans say whenever possible.

OzoneTom August 13, 2009 at 3:54 pm

Joe, you should’ve stuck with designing leisure slacks. Then most people wouldn’t realize that you are an idiot. They would have just thought that you had poor taste.

jetjaguar August 13, 2009 at 3:54 pm

“… NO ONE CAN TELL… IT’S JUST FOR MEN GEL”

queeraselvis v 2.0 August 13, 2009 at 3:54 pm

Jesus Christ on a unicycle, Farah. We’ve been through all this before. Barry was not birthed by humans; he was transported here from the distant planet of Kobol, right before the entire civilization was wiped out by an evil cyborg-sentient race known as the Cylons. GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT, MORAN.

JMP August 13, 2009 at 3:55 pm

[re=385649]NoWireHangers[/re]: http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/archives/individual/2009_07/019306.php

Basically: over half the South are birther morans; and hardly anybody else.

ioksotot23 August 13, 2009 at 3:55 pm

Actually, he was visiting himself, stranded in the past, after the time travel incident that happens at the end of his second term….there are NO paradoxes…He is literally dead before he becomes president… Undead POTUS?… or simply unattached from the continuum of normal mortals… who would let dying in ought eight stop them from ruling the world in ought nine?

samsuncle August 13, 2009 at 3:56 pm

A reliable source told me that Madelyn Dunham is also the real mother of Michael Jackson’s kids.

aaronincus August 13, 2009 at 3:58 pm

I have some circumstantial evidence that Farah is a douche bag. Seriously, that mustache must collect something.

Gopherit August 13, 2009 at 3:58 pm

There’s plenty of circumstantial evidence that Farah provides oral pleasure to ruminants.

Buzz Feedback August 13, 2009 at 3:58 pm

Joe needs to call Hair Club for Men.

geminisunmars August 13, 2009 at 3:58 pm

[re=385649]NoWireHangers[/re]: What we are seeing is that the wingnuts are imploding, and this is just their death throes, and in a year we will look back and remember all the charming birthers and deathers, and maybe visit their gravesites or padded cells, chuckle ruefully and recall the era of Orly and Sarah, and now I think I will go take my meds.

ioksotot23 August 13, 2009 at 3:59 pm

the loop!!! the loop!!! get me out of…..

“Hello World!”

Dear Diorama August 13, 2009 at 4:00 pm

You people are making Trig cry. And by that, I mean anyone who happens to exist and feels sad.

WIDTAP August 13, 2009 at 4:00 pm

Please be patient with this man, fellow Wonketteers. After all, Joe Farrah can not prove who his father was, as his own mother was known as a “sporting woman”.

trickyrick August 13, 2009 at 4:01 pm

Joseph Farahs father is Joe McCarthy! And his mother is a test tube!
He is the first human clone!
Yes, yes he is. He will deny this but that is what clones do, ya’ know.

magic titty August 13, 2009 at 4:02 pm

Come on Farah. Everyone knows Barack Obama is V.I.C.K.I from Small Wonder.

[re=385648]Speed Ball[/re]: Gracias.

TGY August 13, 2009 at 4:03 pm

That’s not a mustache, that’s some sort of woolly caterpillar glued to his upper lip.

tootsieroll August 13, 2009 at 4:03 pm

[re=385635]finallyhappy[/re]: I was going to hope shot at a town hall meeting since that would kill two cuckoos with one stone.

Advocatus_Diaboli August 13, 2009 at 4:05 pm

That is one dirty fucking sanchez going on there.

armoredbore August 13, 2009 at 4:05 pm

Christ, even Richard David James’s (aka Aphex Twin) plastic grin is less terrifying than this nut

FunkyPalmettoBug August 13, 2009 at 4:08 pm

[re=385685]Advocatus_Diaboli[/re]: Thats a dirty sanchez done in a coal mine.

aleks August 13, 2009 at 4:09 pm

[re=385639]snideinplainsight[/re]: And Trig’s son.

4tehlulz August 13, 2009 at 4:10 pm

And it is entirely within the realm of possibility that Joseph Farah fucked his mother and there’s a lot of circumstantial evidence to suggest that.

aleks August 13, 2009 at 4:10 pm

[re=385662]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: That makes so much more sense than the official Season Four Finale.

DoctorCulturae August 13, 2009 at 4:11 pm

This idiot’s head of hair is not remotely related to his mustache.

They both consist of hair, but it could be anyone’s hair. Of course he does not reveal the color of his chest or leg hair, the hair on his back, under his arms, in private areas, or most importantly, the hair that permeates his brain. In point of fact he has no brain, just different varieties of hair. His name is actually Harold. Since he is German he is known as Herr Harry. Did I mention it is in the realm of possibility he is a hairmaphrodite?

Country Club Jihadi August 13, 2009 at 4:12 pm

Nothing like a dick sucking ‘stache AND a mock turtleneck.

populucious August 13, 2009 at 4:16 pm

Wow, this must be a real setback for those who believe Obama is actually Indonesian/Kenyan/Chechan/Saudi, cuz if Dunham, who was an American citizen HER ENTIRE LIFE, is his mother, instead of his mother, who was also an American citizen HER ENTIRE LIFE, that would mean that Obama is, in fact, an American Citizen.

Unlike John McCain, who is so clearly Panamanian dictator spawn.

Patty Dumpling August 13, 2009 at 4:18 pm

Neato, this guy is like the inverse of John Bolton.

Canmon (the Inadequate) August 13, 2009 at 4:19 pm

And all of these people are conveniently dead.

imissopus August 13, 2009 at 4:22 pm

I know what I’ll do, I’ll take that whole Trig-is-really-Bristol’s-retarded-baby meme the libs have been passing around for months and apply it to Obama and turn it back in on itself and inside out and upside down. Black is white, we’re through the looking glass here people. Liberal heads will explode all over Amurika! I should change the WorldNet masthead to read Joseph Farah, Editor and Resident Genius. Now I’ll go reward myself by finding a public bathroom with a glory hole and a ten-year-old boy prostitute on the other side of it.

CorkPopper August 13, 2009 at 4:25 pm

I used to think it was sad that Obama’s mom, dad, grandma, and grandpa didn’t survive long enough to see him become President. But now I’m thinking it’s just as well they didn’t have to see the utter insanity hurled his way as a result. Although Stanley Ann seemed like a pretty tough dame…she could probably whoop some of those wingnut’s asses.

AnnieGetYourFun August 13, 2009 at 4:26 pm

[re=385662]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: That reminds me – Season 6 is next in my Netflix queue! Don’t spoil the end for me.

momus August 13, 2009 at 4:27 pm

Has anyone ever seen Sarah Palin’s parents? Or for that matter who believed Confederate Air Force veteran, John McCain, when he introduced his mother as his mother! She has to be younger than he is since he’s a civil war veteran.

lee hussein oswald August 13, 2009 at 4:32 pm

TRUE FACT: LOU REED KNEW THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN ALL ALONG!1


Yesterday, Daisy Mae and Biff were grooving on the street
And just like in a movie, her hands became her feet
Her belly button was her mouth
Which meant she tasted what she’d speak

But the funny thing is what happened to her nose
It grew until it reached all of her toes
Now when people say her feet smell they mean her nose

And anyway, isn’t that really Omar Sharif?

gurukalehuru August 13, 2009 at 4:32 pm

Unless I am badly misunderstanding the meaning of “circumstantial evidence,” he does not have circumstantial evidence. What he’s got is specualation, and its not even intelligent speculation.

There is, on the other hand, plenty of circumstantial evidence (flight manifests, witnesses, Bristol being out of school for months with “mono”) that little Trigger is not Sarah’s baby.

The Station Manager August 13, 2009 at 4:32 pm

Jesus fuck, it’s like they’re not even trying anymore.

[re=385648]Speed Ball[/re]: You are a god!

NYNYNY August 13, 2009 at 4:36 pm

I had the opportunity to meet Mr Farrah once, and also to examine his authentic bird certificate. He is, in face, an adult male albatross, born in Alaska, and he feeds mostly on the vomit of squid-eating whales.

PS- He looks kind of like “The Millionaire Patriot” Ignatius Piazza.

MichaelG August 13, 2009 at 4:36 pm

Isn’t Farah a Lebanese name? So, does this mean he’s a Muslin?

sezme August 13, 2009 at 4:43 pm

Barack Obama is Michael Jackson’s biological son. True story! Madelyn Dunham is still the mother, though.

Min August 13, 2009 at 4:48 pm

I give him points for creativity, but I’m taking them all back for inflicting that creepy lip caterpillar on an unsuspecting public.

Don Juanquete August 13, 2009 at 4:49 pm

I thought that was Tom Friedman. Anyway, he should really stop going down on young Asians right after drinking Koolaid, cuz the pubes all stick to his lip.

BadKitty August 13, 2009 at 4:59 pm

I think the only question left is whether racism causes brain damage or brain damage causes racism ’cause there’s obviously a link.

PlanetWingnuta August 13, 2009 at 5:02 pm

man…some people hate blacks a lot!

Kingbee August 13, 2009 at 5:05 pm

I wonder how Obama’s grandmother would have explained that one to Obama’s grandfather? Especially since his grandmother did not carry any of this grandfather’s genes, but if you look at the two of them smiling, Obama’s face looks a lot like his grandfather’s. The only conduit for that would be his mother.
Shit, did I just dignify this crap with a reasonable attempt at a response?

Don Juanquete August 13, 2009 at 5:07 pm

All snipers wear black turtlenecks.
Farah wears black turtlenecks.
Coincidence?

Voyou Charmant August 13, 2009 at 5:12 pm

SINCE CBS, ABC, NBC, CNN, AND THE NEW YORK TIMES WILL NOT TALK ABOUT THIS, WILL YOU FORWARD THESE TO THE (APPROXIMATE NUMBER) 200 MILLION AMERICANS THAT HAVE INTERNET ACCESS? THANK YOU.

The Church of Realism August 13, 2009 at 5:42 pm

[re=385668]Gopherit[/re]: Ruminant = Jonah Goldberg

rocktonsammy August 13, 2009 at 5:46 pm

You just can’t make this up!

This guy should write a book,go on Glen Beck and have a crazy off.

tavella August 13, 2009 at 6:02 pm

[re=385828]Kingbee[/re]: Especially since his grandmother did not carry any of this grandfather’s genes, but if you look at the two of them smiling, Obama’s face looks a lot like his grandfather’s. The only conduit for that would be his mother.

That’s what adds the extra-special crazy cherry on the insane sundae that is Farah — Obama looks astoundingly like his grandfather, there isn’t any doubt about where he came from.

Tundra Grifter August 13, 2009 at 6:10 pm

I can not recommend too highly “On the Road With the Birthers”:

http://www.esquire.com/the-side/richardson-report/obama-birthers-movement-part-one-080409

This is great stuff! Scarer than “When a Stranger Calls,” of course, but we can’t defend outselves if we don’t understand the nutz who are out there…

Tundra Grifter August 13, 2009 at 6:11 pm

[re=385949]tavella[/re]: OK, tavella, I’ll be the first. That’s no surprise that Mr. Obama looks astoundingly like his grandfather, since they all look alike.

BTW: The last time one of my African-American friends used that line on me, my response was “No, that’s not true. Some of y’all are ugly…”

desertwind August 13, 2009 at 6:23 pm

What does Andrew Sullivan think?

desertwind August 13, 2009 at 6:30 pm

[re=385828]Kingbee[/re]: Yeah, that’s only the most obvious. Barack looks a lot like Grandpa Dunham, don’t he?

The real truthy truth?

Stanley is the father and Stanley is the mother!!!

hobospacejunkie August 13, 2009 at 6:54 pm

[re=385636]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Yeah, I heard Joseph Farah likes to masturbate pigs to orgasm and then drink their semen. I mean, it’s just hearsay, may not even be true, but there you go. The man likes drinking pig semen. Or so I heard.

Keram2 August 13, 2009 at 6:59 pm

Where’s your moustache’s birth certificate, fraudbot?

Habsberg August 13, 2009 at 7:17 pm

I just saw a YouTube video that has Lynne Cheney saying that Barack Obama is Dick Cheney’s 8th cousin. George W. Bush is his 11th. It has been all in the family the whole time.

MarSF August 13, 2009 at 7:38 pm

Wake up, Sheeple! Obama’s “Grandmother” had a secret fling with an African Muslin back when it wasn’t fashionable. It’s just so obvious I can’t believe Glenn Beck isn’t all up in this shit.

Lionel Hutz Esq. August 13, 2009 at 8:35 pm

So, Madelyn Dunham is Kenyan?

naveed August 13, 2009 at 10:02 pm

Is this guy stoned?

TJBeck August 13, 2009 at 11:18 pm

Until I see his Kansan long form cirtificate of birf, I will not believe this lie. Convene the Death Panel!

jbd August 14, 2009 at 8:38 am

Why not just quote Shelley?

I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them on the sand,
Half sunk, a shatter’d visage lies, whose frown
And wrinkled lip and sneer of cold command
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamp’d on these lifeless things,
The hand that mock’d them and the heart that fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
“My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!”
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away

And on the other hand, why quote Shelley?

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