LEGALESE  6:27 pm August 8, 2009

Sotomayor’s Swearing-In: It Happened!

by Juli Weiner

Oh right, “¡felicidades!” to Sonia Sotomayor, who made it official with the Supreme Court today. Chief Justice John Roberts performed the two ceremonies—let’s just say incorrectly—at the Supreme Court building this morning. Sotomayor wore a tasteful suit in a beige hue, and Roberts, as is his wont, wore a black robe. Some of her family members, other Sotomayors, were there too, also in clothes… uh… and that is… pretty much it. Yup. [New York Times]


Hola wonkerados.

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Brendan M. August 8, 2009 at 7:09 pm

Actually, an interesting fact is that the ceremony took place at the Supreme Court rather than the White House, breaking a 70-year tradition. Apparently, “President” Poupon (why didn’t that one catch on?), being some Constitution-hugger and law nerd, thought it would be a good idea to demonstrate that Sotomayor will be an independently racist justice instead of an Obama-controlled racist justice, so he didn’t even attend.

obfuscator August 8, 2009 at 7:18 pm

aaron sorkin’s president bartlet appointed the first female chief justice(glenn close) and the first hispanic justice(edward james olmos).

barry done got himself a twofer!

[re=381804]Brendan M.[/re]: “president poupon” sounds like it would be the perfect combination of bad pun and 4th grade level doody joke… can’t believe freepers and ‘baggers never jumped on that one.

Cogito Ergo Bibo August 8, 2009 at 7:21 pm

Who’s the freaked out lady in the middle? Chill, sister! Wait. That’s her mother? As a similarly situated Latino woman, doesn’t she realize that the path to the future is now paved with gold and tamales?

Actually, as a female attorney of the dreaded Caucasian persuasion, I still can’t help but be proud. About time we get some truly loud women on that court. Ginsberg is too mousey.

shadowMark August 8, 2009 at 7:32 pm

In her kitchen today Harriet Miers is slicing and chopping the hell out of all her vegetables muttering, “Wise Latina my ass I’m a wise ass Texas girl lotta fucking good it did me…”

Buzz Feedback August 8, 2009 at 7:36 pm

Did Roberts bring his kid and let him perform the Electric Slide again?

Bearbloke August 8, 2009 at 8:04 pm


Jukesgrrl August 8, 2009 at 8:16 pm

Wow, who knew her amazing qualifications included etiquette expert? The eggshell suit was a perfect choice for an over-40 second wedding, this time marrying the Constitution.

And I agree with [re=381808]Cogito Ergo Bibo[/re]: that we should celebrate a loud woman. I hope she dresses down every male lawyer with a Southern accent who dares to approach her bench — just in case they’re related to Jeff Sessions.

azw88 August 8, 2009 at 8:20 pm

[re=381804]Brendan M.[/re]: White House ceremony is Wed, where Obama will announce that he is enslaving all of America, and Sotomayor will confirm that it is all legal.

azw88 August 8, 2009 at 8:25 pm
Atheist Nun August 8, 2009 at 8:33 pm

What happened? I thought all the Chorizo-hating racists were going to flood the streets with their guns and start a race war rather than “allow” her to be sworn in? What a bunch of pussies. And I was so looking forward to watching the National Guard swat them down like gnats, on the TV.

El Pinche August 8, 2009 at 8:46 pm


Scandalabra August 8, 2009 at 8:48 pm

I fully expected the Sotomayors to wear grass skirts, banana headresses and coconut shell bras.

Joshua Norton August 8, 2009 at 8:51 pm

What? No gun fire? No tortillas being thrown in the air? What a let down.

You’d almost think the whole thing was normal or something.

azw88 August 8, 2009 at 9:09 pm

[re=381827]Joshua Norton[/re]: tortillas flying through the air is a UofA graduation tradition, besides, Sotomayor is Puerto Rican, so they’d throw mojitos and pigs instead.

facehead August 8, 2009 at 9:13 pm

[re=381826]Scandalabra[/re]: For real, how does this woman expect to get any ass dressed like that? Is that Chirac behind Sotomayor? He could help. In any case, wake me up when wilding is constitutional.

Mahousu August 8, 2009 at 9:15 pm

Justice Roberts is going to be livid. You caught his bald spot in the picture. Wonkette (and the New York Times) will be ruled unconstitutional.

thebeatgoeson August 8, 2009 at 9:16 pm

[re=381832]azw88[/re]: Or arroz y gandules and chicharrones…

DoctorCulturae August 8, 2009 at 9:18 pm

A special note of thanks to Chief Justice Roberts for reading from note cards this time. Got gravitas?

Lionel Hutz Esq. August 8, 2009 at 9:28 pm

Wanna bet she doesn’t have a birth certificate either?

And did they do the oath in both English and Puerto Rican?

wheelie August 8, 2009 at 9:53 pm

“I like to Judge in America!
Irritate Drudge in America!
Make socialist law in America!
For left-wing bourgeois in America!”

Seriously, she should not have sung that at the ceremony. It took from her gravitas.

Cogito Ergo Bibo August 8, 2009 at 9:56 pm

[re=381841]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: And did they do the oath in both English and Puerto Rican?


gjdodger August 8, 2009 at 9:59 pm

What can I say but, “Ave, Maria”? Suck on that, Huck.

Terry August 8, 2009 at 10:04 pm

Yay, Sonia! Continue to be yourself and let ‘em gnash their teeth.

hoosiermama August 8, 2009 at 10:11 pm

Gravitas. Oh, nothing — I just wanted to write “gravitas.”

shadowMark August 8, 2009 at 10:17 pm

[re=381854]hoosiermama[/re]: Jus primae noctis. Oh, nothing — I just wanted to, ummm, never mind.

hobospacejunkie August 8, 2009 at 10:22 pm

Roberts is red
Sonia is blue
She showed the racists
Who eat their own poo

Now she’s a justice
She’ll wear a black gown
And torment the wingtards
By just being brown

Suds McKenzie August 8, 2009 at 10:44 pm

All of this to become Souter’s Housekeeper??

SayItWithWookies August 8, 2009 at 10:52 pm

[re=381823]Atheist Nun[/re]: It makes a world of difference to get approved before the August recess. Had the Republicans succeeded in delaying a vote, you can bet there would’ve been signs at the town halls saying “Keep Government Out of My Supreme Court!”

kudzu August 8, 2009 at 11:10 pm

I’m so happy this has happened. Fuck conservatives!

WadISay August 8, 2009 at 11:39 pm

Haha, I see that Roberts is reading the oath from a script this time, instead of trying to show off how smart his is by memorizing it, and goofing it up, as he did at Barry’s inauguration. He can limit displays of his powers of intellect to bending spoons with psychokinesis.

villageatrois August 9, 2009 at 12:19 am


I sit on the bench in America
I’m not just a wench in America
Don’t speak no French in America
Club Bush with a wrench in America.

Lord Growing August 9, 2009 at 1:43 am

When did Roberts get Boehnerized? Dude’s looking pretty orange.
How am I supposed to be scared of Sonia when the Republicans keep trying to make themselves darker than her?

Vacation Without Hats August 9, 2009 at 1:50 am


to get approved before the August recess.

It just occurs to me that never has the word “recess” been more appropriate.

I can’t wait for September: “Okay children, you’ve screamed and thrown food at each other long enough, now come back and inside and let’s hope you’ve gotten some of that out of your system”.

ElRat August 9, 2009 at 4:02 am

[re=381832]azw88[/re]: Mojitos, arroz, and pig (bbq ribs) = Fiesta!!!

Arriba … Arriba … Arriba … Arribaaaa … !!!!!

villageatrois August 9, 2009 at 4:11 am

You’re kidding, aren’t you? Some Scrotal Mayor has been confirmed to the US Supreme Court, for more than a few days? I mean who could that be? Only the shithead from Detroit, who was convicted of lolling around with his secretary. Even Rahm Emmanuel wouldn’t tell Obama to make such a stupid appointment.

ExecutorElassus August 9, 2009 at 6:35 am

Where are the pictures of crying eagles? First an illegal immigrant muslin president, and now this. It’s a goddamn disgrace.

Barack H. Obama does not like white people, also.

Dreamer August 9, 2009 at 7:32 am

Wouldn’t it be great if her first Supreme Court case is the detainee photos and she rules against the givernment, That will cement her status as an activist judge in the eyes of the wingers.

Firestarter5 August 9, 2009 at 8:58 am

Why is Rush so against this woman? If anything, it might be easier for him now to go to South America and have 8 year old boys slather eucalyptus oil on his beached whale carcass.

gurukalehuru August 9, 2009 at 9:18 am

Congratulations, Sonia. Now start kicking some ass.

x111e7thst August 9, 2009 at 10:35 am

What I want to know: If K Bailey H makes it past little Rickey in the primary, might her vote against Sonia actually cost her enough at the polls(Tejas has 36% and growing hispanic residents) to cost her the general election? Is it more likely to hurt the Repukes as they try to hold on to the Senate seat?

Roger the Shrubber August 9, 2009 at 10:40 am

As long as John Roberts is Chief Justice the entire U.S. government is a pathetic farce.

Just sayin

Holding Out for a Hero August 9, 2009 at 12:56 pm

I hope Jeff Sessions sees this picture and has a stroke.

ForTheTurnstiles August 9, 2009 at 1:08 pm

[re=381900]ExecutorElassus[/re]: Exactly! What’s the incentive to work if you have health care provided for you, so you have nothing to work for? You could stay at home or drive around on public roads and highways like a good socialist and count on the public safety fire crew and cops to bail you out if you get in trouble doing it like a good socialist, or go to the public beach or the state park and eat your socialist granola because what incentive to work do you have if you can just let the state provide you with recreation and transportation and law enforcement? You see the problems with this future, where you get lazy Mexicans on the Supreme Court deciding God’s laws and health care for everyone? Watch this important video on where America’s going with this south of the border experiment:

skutre August 9, 2009 at 1:18 pm

She’ll be ‘splainin’ all the time, now.

masterdebater August 9, 2009 at 2:08 pm

Only questions now are, how long until the first immigration / welfare case, and how big the explosion inside Hannity’s head will be.

Min August 9, 2009 at 2:35 pm

Judicial chicks rule!

Atheist Nun August 9, 2009 at 3:05 pm

[re=381866]SayItWithWookies[/re]: lol

People these days are woefully ignorant because they do have the awesome Schoolhouse Rock on TV every day:

Would it kill some TV network to run a few episodes of Schoolhouse Rock instead of a crappy informercial?

kudzu August 9, 2009 at 4:16 pm

Roberts looks like he’s constipated, doesn’t he?

facehead August 9, 2009 at 4:38 pm

Looks like DailyKos is filling in for Sunday Wonkette (tee-hee):

How much you want to bet someone quotes this as a serious suggestion?

kdaddy August 9, 2009 at 5:35 pm

I thought there might be a pinata overhead to celebrate in “their way” the swearing in. Big Letdown!

Foolitics August 9, 2009 at 6:21 pm

Michelle Malkin – Stupid, Racist or Both

artbot2000 August 9, 2009 at 6:25 pm

Okay, not entirely a propos but still too good to miss:

Bearbloke August 9, 2009 at 7:28 pm

[re=381949]Foolitics[/re]: both

rocktonsammy August 9, 2009 at 7:36 pm

Betcha she gets the best weed.

El Pinche August 9, 2009 at 7:54 pm

[re=381942]facehead[/re]: According to Mitch McChinless, the GOP is winning. Winning what? Who the fuck the knows what that ugly shit toad is talking about

[re=381949]Foolitics[/re]: What a life! It must suck to be loser unemployed Jesse Malkin’s olive skin meat puppet. She’s Philippino Clayton Bigsby, the blind & black white supremist.

ifthethunderdontgetya" August 10, 2009 at 12:03 am

[re=381949]Foolitics[/re]: Stupid, Racist or Both


Bearbloke August 10, 2009 at 1:22 am


First that fake ‘Moon Landing’ – then n0Bama’s forged ‘Hawaiian’ BIRTH CERTIFICATE

btw – the “Start studying the Scripture” line – that’s a direct quote from an email my Senior-Bear got from one of his Jeebus-tard friends on Sunday, asking him to “Please do not let Obama sign senior death warrants!”….. geez, and some oldz have difficulty understanding why their kids don’t visit all that often…

gurukalehuru August 10, 2009 at 7:45 am

O.K., guys, I know it’s still early where you are, but couldn’t you rerun a Peggy Noonan column or something? Sotomayor’s already been a Supreme Court Justice for, like, forever already. Also.

nader paul kucinich gravel August 10, 2009 at 7:51 am

Beware of Napolitano.
Do not become another Alberto Gonzales.

Buttery1000 August 10, 2009 at 8:30 am

Buddhists can’t be sworn in. They don’t believe in swearing in. They don’t believe in anything. Or is that socialism? I’m so confused.

TGY August 10, 2009 at 9:50 am

What, NO family chickens in orange crates?

zenferret August 10, 2009 at 10:27 am

[re=381949]Foolitics[/re]: Conceded in the Philippines?

Unlearned Hand August 10, 2009 at 10:58 am

“What I want to know: If K Bailey H makes it past little Rickey in the primary, might her vote against Sonia actually cost her enough at the polls(Tejas has 36% and growing hispanic residents) to cost her the general election? Is it more likely to hurt the Repukes as they try to hold on to the Senate seat?”

Short answer: No. The proportion of registered Hispanic voters is much lower than their share of the total state population (I think it’s like 21 percent, but that may be the figure for California), and most wouldn’t vote for KBH anyway. Not that it’ll help.

Of course, in 20 years, Tejas will be bluer than New York on Pride Weekend. Hahah – the browns are WINNING, fucktards! La Reconquista viene!

josereyes.theroof August 10, 2009 at 1:42 pm

[re=382069]Unlearned Hand[/re]: Pinche gringo punetero!

Robert Zimmerframe August 10, 2009 at 10:42 pm

Why is Queen Elizabeth swearing in Judge Sotomayor??

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