A number of you have been sending us this amazing thing out of the blue — Ahh, it was on Sullivan this morning, GOT IT — about a secret chat between French queer Jacques Chirac and American dynamo George W. Bush before the Iraq war, the details of which Chirac has supposedly confirmed: “Incredibly, President George W. Bush told French President Jacques Chirac in early 2003 that Iraq must be invaded to thwart Gog and Magog, the Bible’s satanic agents of the Apocalypse.”
Now maybe Chirac is just lying because he hates George W. Bush so much, but MAYBE NOT.
Now out of office, Chirac recounts that the American leader appealed to their “common faith” (Christianity) and told him: “Gog and Magog are at work in the Middle East…. The biblical prophecies are being fulfilled…. This confrontation is willed by God, who wants to use this conflict to erase his people’s enemies before a New Age begins.”
This bizarre episode occurred while the White House was assembling its “coalition of the willing” to unleash the Iraq invasion. Chirac says he was boggled by Bush’s call and “wondered how someone could be so superficial and fanatical in their beliefs.”
After the 2003 call, the puzzled French leader didn’t comply with Bush’s request. Instead, his staff asked Thomas Romer, a theologian at the University of Lausanne, to analyze the weird appeal. Dr. Romer explained that the Old Testament book of Ezekiel contains two chapters (38 and 39) in which God rages against Gog and Magog, sinister and mysterious forces menacing Israel. Jehovah vows to smite them savagely, to “turn thee back, and put hooks into thy jaws,” and slaughter them ruthlessly. In the New Testament, the mystical book of Revelation envisions Gog and Magog gathering nations for battle, “and fire came down from God out of heaven, and devoured them.”
The Bible is insane. What is this shit? GOG AND MA-GOG?
A French Revelation, or The Burning Bush [Council for Secular Humanism]
{ 152 comments }
First!
…. didn’t know what else to say to this obviously Dubya stupidity. Not surprised.
Good thing he didn’t read Dianetics.
So “asked Thomas Romer, a theologian at the University of Lausanne, to analyze the weird appeal” is French code for “laughed in his fucking face, spat out his coffee, fell to the floor guffawing before finally climbing to his feet again, only for the whole sequence to begin anew,” right?
To be fair, I bet some people in Iraq feel as if the fire came down from God out of heaven, and devoured them.
Thank God Erik Prince was on top of this.
thanks JEWS, thanks for all of this
… So Bush is Jehovah?
Or maybe it’s his brother, Jebovah, the next president of the United States. Yeah! Now it all makes sense.
I’ll take socialism any day.
After the 2003 call, the puzzled French leader didn’t comply with Bush’s request.
Really? How could he say no to a pitch like that?
George W. Bush is a secret liberal agent sent into the heart of the neo-con/christian matrix in order to destroy it from the inside by pushing the conservative movement right past the edge of crazy. Go, George, Go!
“wondered how someone could be so superficial and fanatical in their beliefs.”
Welcome to W’s US America, Jackie Baby!
[re=380065]Hart88[/re]:
Or Battlefield Earth.
Jesus fucking christ.
little georgie bush
drank a little grog
staggered round the palais royale
screaming “gog! magog!”
gog! magog!
gog! magog!
they’re the team to beat!
we’ll shock-and-awe them
with our bombs
and make ‘em all cooked meat!
well he was a cheerleader, doncha betcha know. and i spewed this out real fast, like a drunken frat boy after one beer too many. also.
You know, whenever you think you’ve seen the craziest possible thing that the Bushies did, they go ahead and surprise you. I’m surprised that anyone in the EU would take his phone call at all, including the British.
[re=380066]hobospacejunkie[/re]: No, that’s very much in the French, enarque tradition. When profoundly weird shit happens, go ask an expert to tell you something about it, so you know how to respond.
Chirac is used to dealing with full-on crazies like the French West African dictators. A bit of fundamentalist crackpottism won’t faze him. Surprise, yes. Faze, no.
But this is seriously insane, yes.
It was just Bush choking on a pretzel.
What happened to Pagog? I assume that Magog is a radical lesbian separatist single mom.
With the guards of Magog, swarming around,
The Pied Piper takes his children underground.
Dragons coming out of the sea,
Shimmering silver head of wisdom looking at me.
He brings down the fire from the skies,
You can tell he’s doing well by the look in human eyes.
Better not compromise.
It won’t be easy.
666 is no longer alone,
He’s getting out the marrow in your back bone,
And the seven trumpets blowing sweet rock and roll,
Gonna blow right down inside your soul.
Pythagoras with the looking glass reflects the full moon,
In blood, he’s writing the lyrics of a brand new tune…
I have to admit, I am hoping this is false. really. If true, it means the prez wasn’t just a lying, self-deluded, crazy mf, it means ….
well, I guess you have me. crazier? more self-deluded?
cause this is really nuts. Gog and Magog? wtf? papists don’t really get into that kind of stuff, so it isn’t as though the nuns spent any time on it.
In 2007, Dr. Romer recounted Bush’s strange behavior in Lausanne University’s review, Allez Savoir. A French-language Swiss newspaper, Le Matin Dimanche, printed a sarcastic account titled: “When President George W. Bush Saw the Prophesies of the Bible Coming to Pass.” France’s La Liberte likewise spoofed it under the headline “A Small Scoop on Bush, Chirac, God, Gog and Magog.” But other news media missed the amazing report.
Subsequently, ex-President Chirac confirmed the nutty event in a long interview with French journalist Jean-Claude Maurice, who tells the tale in his new book, Si Vous le Répétez, Je Démentirai (If You Repeat it, I Will Deny), released in March by the publisher Plon.
Other media didn’t “miss” this report. We just put it aside until we worked through important stuff like that business about who is the real mother of Trig. Now that Palin is sorted out we can get to these theology things.
Scarab: I’m warning you! If you say “Jehovah” one more time! *ouch* RIGHT! Who did that? Come on, who did it?
Magog, by the way, is a town in Quebec. It’s stuff like this that makes me glad that nobody ever gave Bush the real launch codes.
Then the LORD opened the donkey’s mouth, and she said to Balaam, “What have I done to you to make you beat me these three times?”
Balaam answered the donkey, “You have made a fool of me! If I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now.”
The donkey said to Balaam, “Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?”
–Numbers 22:28-30 (NIV)
Maybe Chirac was talking to a donkey, and just didn’t know it. Miracles happen.
Oh … Ma … Gog !!
That kind of thing might have gone over with, say, Bobby Jindal, but really – the FRENCH?
Dubya really needs to get out more often. Either that or stop going on benders along the shores of Lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg.
Wow, sounds kinda unbelievably stupid, so if it were anyone but W. …
In France, the separation between church and state is much more severe than in the U.S. It is just “bad form” for a French leader to invoke God for some political reason or other. If he really said this to Chirac, Chirac must have been completely stunned.
‘Brewers game’? HAHAHA. It’s like they took the Italian Sausage and gave it an ancient Semitic makeover and are now calling it the Kosher Dog.
W-w-what the motherfucking shit? The crazy is strong with this one.
I call bullshit. Regarding George W. Bush, neither Chirac nor anybody else ever “wondered how someone could be so superficial and fanatical in their beliefs.”
Holy shit.
>>This confrontation is willed by God, who wants to use this conflict to erase his people’s enemies before a New Age begins.
WHAT? No, fucking fail George. It’s Jesus who’s supposed to come an….
Oh, I see what you did there.
Gog and Magog? Which of the Jonas brothers are they again? I can’t keep them apart.
Ah the French: all Catholics, all atheists, except you Muslin girls had better take off your do-rags. Crucifixes in every classroom–you got a problem with that?
Dubya’s so dumb. Had he offered some prostitutes and Cubans, we wouldda had us a real coalition. You gotta know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em.
Are you sure that this isn’t from Ghostbusters?
Dubya discovering the Bible and having his alcohol demons slain by an angel who looks like Jacqueline Bisset is a little like that 16-year-old outsider discovering Ayn Rand and all temporarily seeming right with the world. Except that 16-year-old will grow out of in five years, whereas Dubya will become a burned-out, increasingly bitter dry drunk.
I didn’t need to hear this shit today. Im’a find this douche what published this in the first place three days in the past and put him a day behind so I can put this pain off til tomorrow.
I don’t understand how someone could believe and the literal truth of the bible and then spend eight years with Dick Cheney and not notice that Cheney was Satan
“Hey, you got Gog and Magog in my ferrin’ policy!”
Good God, It’s Magog Brothers Atlantis Carpet Reclaimers!
0:49
Firesign Theatre:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZqEpUw6ilQ
We’re all secular humanists today
Alls I know is that somebody better be working on some Gog and Magog paper mache giant puppets for disruptive use at Democratic town meetings. Fuck, I’ll make them myself and give them to a nice Wingnut to use. This is golden, GOLDEN!
You people are all silly. EVERYONE knows that “Gog and Magog” were a vaudeville act that was extremely popular in certain parts of the Midwest (Sandusky metro area) in the 1900-1910 period. In addition to witty repartee (often at the expense of Irish, Italians, and Poles), they were well known for their trained poodle act, in which four poodles would urinate in unison on a member of the audience (generally someone Irish, Italian or Polish). They often claimed to have performed at the fabled Palace Theater in New York City, but critics later determined they had only made it as far as the sidewalk outside. “Gog” (nee Taylor Mellon Brathwaite III) died destitute on the streets of Cleveland, while “Magog” (nee Jerome Hershkowitz) later went on to become (in conjunction with the famed Max Factor) Deanna Durbin.
I’m honestly wondering if Bush ever really believed any of this shit. I mean, the guy was a brain-damaged fartnut, but he never struck me as particularly gullible. If someone actually believed in Gog and Magog, wouldn’t they behave a bit more seriously than Bush does? Or is that where the retard part comes in?
I don’t doubt that he tried to use this Republican logic on Chirac, just that he actually, truly thinks it’s feasible that Biblican monsters are hanging out, unable to smoke now thanks, in Iraq.
[re=380067]dmac[/re]: “fire came down from Erik Prince” * fixed.
[re=380070]jetjaguar[/re]: oh, no, do not blame us for Bush. He is one of YOUR boys!
I’m not surprised. Appalled and disgusted, yes — but not surprised. It would take an entirely unprecedented level of blind stupid fanaticism from Captain Dumbass to surprise me.
That said, this should be on the front page of every newspaper in America tomorrow morning, and the lead story of every newscast tonight.
The article in Allez Savoir is worth a read. There’s something about cooking frog legs without being told: “Vous avez de la ciboulette sur votre dent.”
George W. Bush et le Code Ezéchiel
Quand il évoque la situation politique au Proche-Orient, le président des Etats-Unis voit Gog et Magog à l’oeuvre. Deux créatures qui apparaissent dans une vision apocalyptique de l’Ancien Testament! Les explications de Thomas Römer, un expert de l’UNIL qui a été contacté par l’Elysée en 2003, quand Jacques Chirac cherchait à élucider les références troublantes de George W. Bush.
[re=380083]Judas Peckerwood[/re]: No. Magog was the ancient Babylonian telephone monopoly.
If you really want to jangle your neurons, consider the fact that 48…forty fucking eight…world leaders said yes to this pitch.
The neocon who asked Dubya to do this must have had a right old laugh with his mates, down the pub later on.
All those years, all the leaders of the world having to tiptoe around this deranged moron, because hey, we still gots the bombs. And remember, around this time, we had fucking loon Rumsfeld and Cheney making remarks about the “irrelevance” of “old Europe,” because Russia and the slavic countries were the new happening scene, so fuck you Germany. How fucking bizarre must the whole thing have been, really, to all rational world leaders, when this crazed, jinking, wired-out drunken rambling bullying retard came swaggering around. It must be like when your best female friend goes and marries a meth-head hells angel. You love your friend, you really do, but geeze, what do you do about this thing she hooked up with?
By the scrotum hairs of Gog and Magog, never have I heard such talk!
[re=380113]bureaucrap[/re]: That may be true, but Gog Magog is also the name of my Milli Vanilli tribute band.
Wow, and these fuckers said we were wearing the tinfoil hats.
[re=380117]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Operative word: “should”
Palin/Gog-Magog 2012!
this shouldn’t be surprising news at all about smirky monkey’s loony tunes for war. he’s a fundamentalist christian and they all got boners and wet-spots for the apocalypso, i kid you not. doncha know? hey, i was raised as one, and we was waitin and waitin for jesus to come back and kick the asses of everybody we were taught to hate, which was everybody who didn’t look just like us and think just like us. i got away, but millions of the otherwise regular peeps, their minds are still ensnared. i’m tryin to snark here, but i feel snark-bitten with a deep fear welling up. there are millions of people in this country and millions more around the world who would like nothing better than to see a fiery planetary holocaust unleashed so they can live out their religious fantasies. the 43rd president of these united states was (and remains, i have no doubt) one of their number. happy hiroshima day, everybody.
[re=380110]Atheist Nun[/re]: Wow, didn’t know there was a video of “Everything You Know Is Wrong.” Makes me want to get high just thinking about it. Nino the Mind-Boggler says it’s okay.
[re=380122]Prommie[/re]: “It must be like when your best female friend goes and marries a meth-head hells angel.”
Whoa, you’re friends with Meghan McCain?
Gog and Magag still walk among us. Only most of us know them as the Olsen twins.
[re=380083]Judas Peckerwood[/re]: What happened to Pagog?
He ran off with Ma Kettle, leaving Magog behind to care for Gog, Jr.
[re=380093]TeddyS[/re]: Dammit! You beat me to it!
is this the real reason we had Freedom Fries?
[re=380070]jetjaguar[/re]: Oi veh, they’ve suffered enough. Anyway, The Revelation of St. John the Divine was written by a shroom-addled hermit Christian living on the island of Patmos well after the death of the alleged Jesus.
And it’s somehow fitting that Dubya would justify his fever-brained policies by invoking the most incoherent book in the Bible.
[re=380114]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: I’m pretty sure Dubya believed it — it’s exactly his level of faith-based stupidity. On the other hand, the people manipulating Dubya (Cheney and Rove, for instance) probably didn’t. Whether strategic genius Donald Rumsfeld did is up for grabs.
[re=380129]Carson[/re]: Gog and Magog (Palin)?
#1&2 baby names 2012!
[re=380081]Tybalt[/re]:
hobospacejunkie: No, that’s very much in the French, enarque tradition.
Yeah, but having to go and ask an expert on ancient religions as if you’d been listening to some cave man you’d just unearthed instead of the President of the United States, I mean you better believe they were laughing. I can just see them nodding and listening, then the moment he left asking “Gogue? Ma Gogue? C’est qoui ça??”
I actually heard about this at least a year ago, but then again I live in France. Though I think I read it in a US blog.
A girl got a pet Gog. She liked to go running with her pet Gog. She played with her pet Gog in her house. She played with her pet Gog in her yard.
But the Gog did some things that made the girl’s dad mad. The Gog ate things. He ate cans and he ate canes. He ate pans and he ate panes. He even ate capes and caps.
One day her dad said, “That Gog must go. He eats too many things.” The girl said, “Dad, if you let the Gog stay with us, I will see that he stops eating all those things.”
***[At this point, White House Chief of Staff Andrew Card interrupts the president for 5 minutes. The president returns to the book looking pallid. ]***
He returns to the story, reading a little more softly. ]
Her dad said, “We will try it.”
So the Gog stayed and the girl made him stop eating cans and canes and caps and capes.
But one day a Magog came to the girl’s house.
He saw a big red car near the house and said, “I will steal that car.”
Magog ran to the car and started to open the door.
The girl and the Gog were playing in the backyard. They did not see the Magog.
Magog!! [President Bush decides to leave it at that.]
BUT, NOBAMA IS A SOCIALISTIC COMMIE!!1111! also, too. GOG HAZ A VALAD BURTH CERTIFIKATE!!11
[re=380116]finallyhappy[/re]: We Jews learned a long time ago that you can’t take things at face value, especially the Bible. We addressed that by writing the Talmud and learning to haggle things DOWN from their face value.
Chirac: “Ha, ha, ha George. Right. Call me in the morning when you’re sober. No. No. I’m hanging up now, George. Goodnight. GOODNIGHT, GEORGE! BYE!” click
Mon dieu.
[re=380131]V572625694[/re]: red beans and reds, a little rat cheese, and some of uncle sigmund’s fine peruvian cocoa powder will help alter your state. you can get them all down at clarence despares house of bad brakes. tell him necessity sent you.
Prez Fail
[re=380096]SmutBoffin[/re]: I saw that too. Just wait until Randall Simon shows up and whacks ‘em.
[re=380095]facehead[/re]:
My friends in France are actually astonished that we swear in Presidents on a bible. “You see,” they explain, “it’s odd to us, because here in France we have this thing called “separation of church and state”.
And we do too, I patiently explain. Not that I got any help from George Bush and his Pet Gog.
Did I remember thanking everyone for making it possible for me to actually have conversations with people about the US government again? Thanks glory be to us all if even just for that.
And that little boy who standing on the street corner shouting that the end was near grew up to be…President George W. Bush. Now you know…the rest of the story.
FYI: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4HMRtxY-ik
Wrong one above. Dammit. Can you delete that old one, Jim?
This is Randal Simon.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3V9kJw-kWQ8&feature=related
Isn’t Gog and Magog a bar on Wisconsin Avenue in D.C.?
[re=380070]jetjaguar[/re]: They may have written the source materials, but if you’re going to blame someone, blame the fucking English. It’s their religious rejects who created this great nation of ours (after killing off the Nephites and all. Or was it the Lamanites? I can never remember which ones supported AmericaJesus and which ones had to be punished for their bad attitudes and fabulous tans). The Jews have enough blame for other stuff, like not clubbing Oily Taitz to death as soon as she showed up in Tel Aviv.
We survived eight years with that crazy fuck as president?
Well, not all of us did, of course, which is the sad thing…
[re=380120]user-of-owls[/re]: “Don’t forget Poland”.
Wait, I thought that “Gog” and “Magog” were Jenna’s and Barbara’s secret service code names. Did Bush take us to war just to stop one of their benders?
All I know is that the true god, Xenu, would never condone this.
Let me see if I got this straight: God didn’t smite Gag and Magog hard enough back in the Old Testament, so they came back to mess around again in the New Testament?
God is such a pussy.
Now, where I get confused is the part about God needing us to defeat the enemies of his people. I mean, he’s God, right? Why would he need help?
What part of ‘all-powerful’ does God not get?
God: “BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!! Foolish American president man! Little do you realize that YOU are God and PALAU is Magog! Your coalition of the willing shall fail most epically! I have tricked you into bringing about your own APOCALYPSE. Everything is going according to plan.”
*Gog – fixed
[re=380131]V572625694[/re]: I didn’t either! I was just looking for a clip of the audio, now I am watching the lip-synch movie, mind blown for the day. Still pee-your-pants-funny, but those Firesign bastards got me at an impressionable age!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fv041-dAnqs
“Beware! Your brain may no longer be the boss.”
[re=380165]natoslug[/re]: Or was it the Lamanites?
What’d they have against cheap counter-tops?
To be perfectly fair, Ezekiel and the Apocolypse of John are easily the best reads in that thing. It’s like skimming through the Silmarillion for the Ley of Leithian and the sack of Gondolin: Cheating, but justifiable. Gog and Magog indeed.
Wait, what?
Look, all I’m saying is that if you can convince people that it’s a swell idea to cut off part of your penis, you have way too much power. And with great power, comes great responsibility. Superman taught us that.
See, what the article doesn’t say is that W was trying out his fancy french-speakin’ when this all occured. After the meeting, he came back and told Laura “I must have said it wrong. They brought me cheese on a shoe.”
[re=380084]doloras[/re]:
“Pythagoras with the looking glass reflects the full moon”
He had a little theorum, too, mostly used to torture middle school kids.
[re=380191]jetjaguar[/re]: You mean Spiderman.
I’m sorry, dear editors, but I feel I need to request a “giant puppet” tag for this story -
While Chuck Colson (formerly of Watergate fame, now of born-again Christian prison ministry) did support the Iraq War, I am reminded that he wrote a book back in Reagan’s days (I think it was “Kingdoms in Conflict” in 1987) that warned AGAINST electing a hard-core end-of-days Bible literalist as president. As I recall, Colson feared such a president would be very tempeted to view Mid-east conflict through the prism of their particular and probably misguided view of God’s intent and thus could drag the U.S. into a Mid-east war that would destroy Israel and might go nuclear. Seems old Chucky was about 80% right in W’s case.
[re=380138]GreatOldOnesParty[/re]: Or at least her new Twitter handlenow that she can’t be AKGovSarahPalin.
“Gog and Ma-Gog” sounds like the name of an adorable Mom and Pop general store… something the former president and his missus might consider establishing in Crawford??
I’m suprised that a crack team of Delta Force types weren’t given the assignment of tracking down this Whore of Babylon that Bush had read so much about.
[re=380206]Cape Clod[/re]: She was at a rooming house on C Street.
[re=380084]doloras[/re]: [re=380195]Terry[/re]: ‘Supper’s Ready.’ Very good.
Technically speaking, god could light up this bitch herself. But she gotta go pick up her other kids from space camp. She left us a note asking if we’d mind getting the party started until she gets back. If we’ve already blown shit up already it’ll be less smiting and cutting down she has to do. Yay god!!!
[re=380130]slappypaddy[/re]: Didn’t Harry Belafonte sing Apocalypso? I didn’t think the Evangelisicos liked much those dark people.
[re=380222]zenferret[/re]: Isn’t Apocalyptica a string-quartet Metallica tribute band?
Gog and Magog are names used by Skull and Bones. I think Magog was the name assigned to Poppy Bush. Lordy W., have father issues much?
[re=380137]SayItWithWookies[/re]: This story line was the on the daily briefing to Bush, the daily ‘cover letter’ from Rumsfeld. It had pictures, too. So then Bush called France about it.
[re=380153]Bill E Pilgrim[/re]: Probably the most devoutly Catholic person I know is a French schoolteacher who insists, every time she steps into the classroom, on hiding the cross she wears around her neck. When I told her that in the U.S. there are actually people who want to hold prayer in public schools, she was aghast.
God pretty much regrets making that whole promise never to drown us all ever again. (What did you think the rainbow was for?) That was so easy. Just leave the spigot running and go on about your bidness.
The Book of Ezekiel? Is that the one before The Half-Blood Prince one?
Wasn’t “Magog” Pappy Bush’s name in Skull and Bones?
[re=380084]doloras[/re]: Genesis. Foxtrot. Excellent.
A Brewers game?
Ya betcha, Jim! Those are the team’s mascots, Grog and Magrog.
Back in ye olde Brewer’s glory days, one of them would jump out of an authentic bier haus in right field and slide down into a giant mug every time someone hit a home run.
Nowadays, some douche named Bernie rides an ugly yellow waterslide into a hot tub or something, though since the Brewer’s so rarely hit home runs, it’s mostly just for show.
what’s so amazing about this? bush, our prez at the time, stated that God told him to invade and smite Iraq! remember? (what is “smite?”
but just think- if a Prez said that he heard a voice coming from his radio, which was turned off at the time, telling him to invade a country, he’d be carted off to a mental institution.
however, by saying it came from some sky-god, it makes it ok and quite normal in the god-endorsed and smitten US of A (also known as The Theocratic States of America and/or The United States of Jeebus.
[re=380205]foryoublue[/re]: The former prez and his wife no longer dwell in crawford, the ranch was sold shortly after he left office. Our horse-fearing, mountain-biking, connecticut cowboy no longer needed the stage set. I hate the man with the light of ten thousand flaming white-hot shoes.
Domain name “gogandmagog.com” is already taken (some doctor in Madiera) though that one might better be a .org or .mil. How soon can WWE copyright the name for a tag team? Pro ‘rasslin always needs good villians.
Gogmagog was an 80′s metal band featuring the violent drunk singer who was kicked out of Iron Maiden and the drunk midget guitarist who was kicked out of Def Leppard (not the drunk hairball guitarist who died of alcohol poisoning).
It also had the drummer from Iron Maiden who has MS.
Why did George W. Bush want the French to join him in attacks on drunks and people with MS?!? And what does he have against single-album 80′s British metal supergroups?!?
This news is two months old. See the Council on Secular Humanism’s website at
http://www.alternet.org/politics/140221/bush‘s_shocking_biblical_prophecy_emerges:_god_wants_to_%22erase%22_mid-east_enemies_%22before_a_new_age_begins%22/
This is the worst case of projection that I have ever seen. Any sane biblical nutter knows that Bush and Blair were Gog and Magog: Weren’t they the ones assembling a “coalition of the willing” to battle Iraq?
[re=380130]slappypaddy[/re]: Yes, the fundies seem to forget that St. John was given a vision of heaven, which is supposed to be uncomprehensible to mere mortals, so he wrote his description of the end days and heaven using symbols and metaphor — heaven is a bejeweled copy of the then-city of Jerusalem (if the book were written today, the Four Horseman would probably ride SUVs). The symbolic nature of the book is something the early church fathers, the Papists and the old main-line Protestant churches all acknowledge and teach. Yet modern evangelicals take the book literally, and this is why they scare the Jebus out of me. To base U.S. foreign policy on very open-to-interpretation passages full of symbolism and metaphor is not just irresponsible, it should be criminal.
[re=380206]Cape Clod[/re]: [re=380261]Ham on Wry[/re]: And for more obscure prog-rock apocalyptica…
So, Jacques Chirac realized as early as 2003, that Captain Codpiece was not exactly, shall we say, mentally competent. Sure fucking kept it to himself long enough, didn’t he?
All politicians are scum. They see us as the unwashed mob, across the barricade.
Totally; we already KNEW that he thought God wanted him to start the Iraq war. This really makes me wonder what Dubya thinks about the Obama-Antichrist rumors. To his credit, Bush has been quite under-the-radar since leaving the presidency… perhaps because he’s started preparing for the rapture (packing all his GI Joes, etc.)
This is why fundamentalism (or specifically the belief that everything in the bible is LITERALLY true instead of LITERATURE-ly true) scares me so.
[re=380074]american mutt[/re]: At least you can see it.
Puppet Theater. Olbermann should be all over this.
Chirac couldn’t brush up on his conversational English enough to tell us before now? And he KNEW Dubya was fuckin’ crackers?
Confucius: “He who is starved for reasons, will often eat shit.”
[re=380296]mightysea[/re]: “perhaps because he’s started preparing for the rapture”
and why did caribou barbie quit her job, i wonder
[re=380113]bureaucrap[/re]: Wow. I actually got your Deanna Durbin reference. I am so gay. I should tell my parents.
Really, we all probably heard this when it happened; but were overwhelmed by Homeland Security, in preparation for “shock & awe”. All in the name of oil, of course.
It kind a makes you think about Blair. I am sure he heard from the fanatical idiot more crazy assed religious lunacy but he went with the fucker anyway. So either Blair shared Bush’s nutty believes or he was a cynical ass who had some crazy imperial designs. I vote for the former.
[re=380376]Dreamer[/re]: Everyone in Britain knows that Tony Blair is a crazy-ass religious lunatic – by British standards, I mean, which means he would not stand out in the Democratic Senate caucus. He converted to Catholicism as soon as he quit as PM, because there’s still a law on the books from the 18th century that a Catholic can’t be Prime Minister.
I think over the centuries something got messed up and flipped there in the text.
Correct translation:
Gog (George Bush). Some of the letters must have gotten wiped away, but you can see where the G_o_g_ comes from “George”
Magog (George W.). See now that “M” is an upside-down “W”…
You’ve only learned about this? GWB was saying similar things to all the world’s leaders for years! God told him to invade Iraq and Afghanistan! (How, I am not sure.)
For a serious account of Gog and Magog (better known as Gyges and his kingdom of Lydia), see Edwin Yamauchi, _Foes From the Northern Frontiers_.
Zhu Bajie
[re=380086]shadowMark[/re]: The Guardian spent some time on it. They’re good on weird gun crimes in the US, too.
Zhu
[re=380130]slappypaddy[/re]: Too true.
Zhu, ex-fundie
[re=380153]Bill E Pilgrim[/re]: Next time, use the Jefferson Bible, the one that leaves out all the miracles! The fundies will sh*t themselves to death!
Zhu
[re=380174]Dr. Zoidberg[/re]: G-d is playing with us. Sometimes He sends a lying spirit to asshats like Ahab or Pres. Bush. He laughs us to scorn.
Zhu
[re=380271]inedalo[/re]: I’ve often wondered how God passed on His messages to GWB. Dreams? Opening the Bible at random? End-times preachers channeling the Almighty?
Zhu
Oh shit! Mittens must be stopped. The Bible x the Book of Mormon = we’re totally fucked!
[re=380084]doloras[/re]:
And it’s, hey, George,
With your mouth all ringed with spit
Hey there, Georgie
Don’t you know you’re full of shit
Even Bush’s drunk dials were fucking lame.
But GOD, I hope this story is true. And if it is, I’m. Going. To. Tell. EVERYONE.
IMPORTANT SAFETY TIP:
If you’re a foreign leader, say the President of France, and another world leader (especially one from a nuclear power) calls you up and mentions anything from the Bible…
TELL THE REST OF THE WORLD IMMEDIATELY! GO TO THE FUCKING UNITED NATIONS!
Chirac enabled W to gain even more power when he was already demonstrably bat shit crazy. So, merci beaucoup for nothing, dickhead.
this gog and magog shit was reported back in may.
http://www.counterpunch.org/hamilton05222009.html
[re=380563]wwew[/re]: Hah! Poppy was “Magog”! I guess that means Barbara was “Make me gag”!
“Hey Rumsfeld – I can never remember, is it Iraq that’s Gog and Iran that’s Magog … or is it the other way around?”
And what does that make North Korea, the last member of that miraculously three-pronged “axis of evil.”
[re=380545]steverino247[/re]: I’m with you, Dude.
Gog + Magog = Demogogue. Memphremagog is a lake in Quebec, with a gigantic lake monster. Dubya used to get f-dup there. Back then, he used to get f-dup everywhere he went.
Be grateful, his other favourite book is “The Hungry Caterpillar”.
[re=380080]Terry[/re]: He didn’t talk to the British, he prayed with them instead, or at least with that other dippy narcissistic fundamentalist, Tony Blair.
Magog can beat up your Gog.
AIPAC Neocons of The Bush Family
Their 9/11 Snow Job is wearing off
Their ‘Federal’ Reserve is in trouble
Left and rights of passage, black and whites of youth.
Who can face the knowledge that the truth is not the truth?
Obsolete absolute.
Anthrax Intimidation.
JFK RFK MLK Malcolm.
Israel-first dual-nationals.
InfoWars on a PrisonPlanet?
A very RawStory on PressTV.
Whistle-Blower leaks multiply.
Beware the divide and conquer.
Both parties are corrupt to the core.
Honesty compassion conscience guts.
Speak no evil, hear no evil, see no evil?
Elite Ruling Class Greed or “public servants”?
Independents agree on more than we disagree.
AIPAC 9/11 Bankers Extortion Blackmail Bribery.
Wall Street Bailout Bill: Bush McCain Obama et al.
Poodles, Puppets, Sham debates, & Scam elections.
Has the Government & Propaganda Media lied to you?
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.
Chronic lying as career path, intellectual prostitution for paycheck.
DNC & RNC have both sold out the country in order to enrich themselves.
Future of a Nation that can not trust the Government & Propaganda Media?
Realignment of American Politics:
Anderson Baldwin Carter Choate Clemente Gonzalez Gravel Kaptur Kucinich McKinney Nader Paul Perot Sheehan Ventura
Cheney tells the best bedtime stories.
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