Wonkette
The Twitters broke for a while today, or yesterday, who gives a shit, but once things became operational again, fat retarded donkey Fred Thompson was ready with a one-liner. Did you know that Barack Obama now has his SS arresting everyone on the Internet? This is what the Republicans are saying, and we have no reason to doubt it. [Washington Independent]
It’s not to late to resurrect “Dipshit McGoo” as a sobriquet for this fine national leader and admitted thespian.
That’s pretty much the entire day’s work for Fred. Back to napping between his wife’s silicone enhanced rack.
And in looking at the top of the post I see you’ve already resurrected the Dipshit name. Oops. Don’t ban me!
Twitter was down? Why the hell didn’t anybody twat about it?
I can’t wait for him to run for president again and use screen shots like this in his ad wars to prove how anti-Obama he was.
Fred is never as funny as he thinks he is. And he was a lazy-ass senator who courted the perks, but avoided the work.
Perhaps Twitter shut down because the servers were finally overloaded by the sheer volume of inane tweetage from McCain, McCain, McCain, Thompson, Graham, Steele, Beck, and Palin.
It was a DDoS attack — Distributed Deluge of Stupidity.
They had their chance to launch “1984.” It’s Barack’s turn now.
But… that doesn’t even make sense. And is not the funny.
Today is the day Fred earned his reputation as “Dipshit Magoo.”
is #ftrs a hash tag for ” old farters” or just “farters”?
Why do these 20-something Republican ghost-twatters insist on using an ellipsis in every fucking post? Extemporaneous punctuation is egregiously stupid when you’re writing in a limited character medium.
I thought Frankenberry Thompson was dead.
It’s so cute how these guys talk about “enemies” of any Democratic Administration and invent all these stories about “hit lists” and so on, while when their ideal Wingnut President was in office they went around making lists of enemies that they actually did kidnap, hog tie, and torture or gave them to some other goons to torture for them.
Russkies don’t take a dump without makin a plan, son. So you just gotta torture everyone and let God sort em out.
Good lord, who let him near a computer?
“fat retarded donkey”? Wonkette used to call him “Dipshit McGoo” or something like that. I’m prefer the McGoo moniker.
Or maybe Jowly McPudfucker
Acting!!!1111!!
I don’t understand one goddamned thing about the Twitter. What the hell does “#tcot #ftrs” even mean?
Fuck this thing.
White House enemies are tortured, reading twitter is torture. This Thompson guy might really be onto something.
I hope we’re peaked out on the wingnuts-go-crazy-because-their-president-is-black-for-real curve. I gotta feeling we’re just on an upward slope.
GAH, that is terrible structure, even for a twat.
I must have been drinking a lot and that may have been why I pass out on the sidwalk outside my house #tcoot #farters.
Answers to the post title’s questions: (a) a B-movie actor and (b) who the fuck knows?
I thought his note said Tweet Dreck. Hasn’t Twitter died yet?
From “TweetDeck”?
Too easy.
One day Obama should decide to do all the things the right-wing slapdicks claim he’s already doing. Just declare Socialism, paint his face like the joker, shut down Twitter, have an orgy with European leaders, change the official language to French and declare himself Chief Witch Doctor of Kenya.
It would be the best calling out of dares ever.
I don’t think he understands.
Obama is happy that you cavemen yap all day and night about stupid, racist, traitorous bullshit. It not only reaffirms that he is doing the right things, all the time, but your whining will help him get reelected in 2012, Dipshit McGoo. So, you know… keep it up, gramps.
On the contrary, I think the Obama administration is secretly providing all the venture capital that’s currently allowing Twitter to operate. Precisely because they hate their enemies so much and wish them harm.
Can you believe this guy was so close to being president of the United States?
…!
What is he doing on his thumbnail there? Casting a spell on all his tw4t-followers? Getting ready to squeeze a fresh one? Preparing to pick his friend’s nose?
Noodle Salad:
insist on using an ellipsis
Yeah I’ve decided that that …. habit is the same as the classic bad comedian doing that trailing off thing after telling a joke, you know the “And she was wearing a turnip twaddler! So anyway,” that serves as a rimshot or filler, presumably so it won’t leave the comic out there hanging in case no one realizes that they’re supposed to laugh. Or something. Just as annoying.
As long as Brak keeps his filthy Ugandan despot claws off of my tentacle pr0n, we’re cool.
Here’s the story about the Republicans claiming that Obama is compiling an “enemies list.”
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/08/06/republicans-claim-white-h_n_252721.html
If you read the story, the only conclusion one could come up with is WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE!!!!!!!?????
(sorry for the all caps and rant– too much coffee)
Min: So he was different from the other 99 senators how?
Fred Thompson is not important enough to be on anybody’s list of enemies, except maybe the one his wife keeps in the back corner of the upper dresser drawer beneath her white undies in the bedroom. On that he is Number Three.
Now, now everybody, Grampa Fred was actually pretty good in the second Die Hard movie where he plays the airport chiefy guy and tells all the air traffic controllers to hold all flights at the outer marker and he gets to say the famous line, “Stack ‘em, pack ‘em, and rack ‘em.” Whatever that means. His downfall was that he accidentally ended up in the Senate ’cause somebody who could write put his name on the ballot and everybody in Tennessee really liked that movie. Just think how far Bruce Willis could have gone?
Bill E Pilgrim: Foolish Fred and the rest of Nixon’s boys think EVERY administration has a White House Enemies List. They are the Princes of Projection.
Poor Fred. He really wanted to be Prez, but when he found out that he had to get off the couch to do it, he pretty much lost interest.
Man, I hope Fred don’t sue you, because I’m pretty sure he’s not a donkey.
AnnieGetYourFun: It’s a Nixon/Watergate reference and it would have made sense in 1973, so let’s give credit where credit is due. An “enemies list” reference then was the hip, kinda like making a Joker reference in 2009.
I should not drink vodka tonics for breakfast because I swear that all makes sense in my head.
nbawriter: You are my God.
Come here a minute: nah, even ReThuglicans (a majority of them, at any rate) were not that stoopid to vote for Dipshit McGoo… his candidacy crashed and burned 1 month into Primary Season, no?
magic titty: tcot=top conservatives on twitter, which I suppose is necessary for us to know they aren’t bottoms?
He only wishes someone would pay him that much attention.
You just *know* that if Fred had been testifying before HUAC back in the ’50’s he would have been 100 times more of a gelatinous cretin than Elia Kazan.
Well, of course he’s got an enemies list. Doesn’t everybody?
#tcot? Turncoat?
imissopus: He never even pretended like he was interested in the actual work of being senator.
it is frightfully humbling to consider what will pass for a United States Senator. truly no child left behind.
Bill E Pilgrim: OK, to paraphrase Joe Biden then: all you need for a Republican twatter is Obama, Socialism, a verb, and an ellipsis. Am I right? Rim shot……………..
imissopus: I guess that maybe somehow makes it tied to Squeaky Fromme’s release from prison today, for trying to shoot Jerry Ford 34 years ago. #ManFam
Goddammit, Fred. Just when I had gotten all superior yesterday about Kentuckians being stoopider than Tennesseans…
Noodle Salad: Bill E Pilgrim: “…” is Tennesseean for “also”. In Minnesota, we use the ablative, trailing “soooooo,” as in, “I think I’ll bring hot dish to the pot luck, soooooo.”
queeraselvis v 2.0: Well, Kentucky is stall represented by Jim Bunning, so there’s that to hold over them.
Noodle Salad: Or:
Q: How can you tell that Fred Thompson is lying?
A: Because his ellipsis moving.
So anyway….
You kids stay off Fred’s Twitter!
The real question is, when will Andrew Sullivan bomb Twitter from space, for being down for like an hour or whatever?
That’s not funny for an actual human — but for Fred, whose main acting talent was taking his glasses of resolutely, it’s the pinnacle of comedy.
And don’t expect more — that twitter was about as much effort as he put into his presidential campaign, so he’s already bored and moving on to something else.
Zadig: Is he back? Or is the guy from Lolcatz still twatting in his stead?
Bearbloke:
his candidacy crashed and burned 1 month into Primary Season, no?
No, he kept everyone guessing for months, entered long after everyone else already had, and he got far more attention by not announcing than he ever did once he announced.
Everyone was all a twitter about whether he’d run, then once he did everyone said Oh. Him. Right.
Funny to think that Twitter didn’t even really exist then, and here we are only a year later and I still don’t care that it does.
Fred, Fred, Fred. You’ve got a beautiful young wife. Why don’t you just find yourself a cozy little getaway in the woods, somewhere in your beautiful state, and let her fuck you to death. Everybody would be happy. Seriously, it’s the best possible thing you can do with the rest of your life.
Sincerely, Gurukalehuru
Hooray For Anything: download paltalk (paltalk.com) and search for the name obama. and you’ll see all these anti obama rooms…and you’ll see they believe this enemies list. one told me after i asked him if he believed in the fema camps. He said yes he did and he didnt think he would live (cause he would be killed) to make it to the camps. I told him good bye and waved at him. of course they kicked me out the room once i talked about the birth certificate and that its hosted on a bipartiasan site. (bipatriasn means liberal) And they accused me of being someone else who also had a brain because he said the same thing I said.
I thought it was real interesting when they said they have seen the fema birth camp pictures but when friends and I asked to see them they asked us to look for them and not do our work for us…meanwhile they were still bitching about not seeing the real birth certificate…I though hmmm ironic.
#tcot = The Coot’s On Twitter
#ftrs = Fred Thompson Really Sucks
Fred and his hero:
http://www.losanjealous.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/fred_and_larry.jpg
Yeah right like Fred Thompson can actually text or tweet. Next you’ll being telling me his wife married him because she has a thing for bald headed, wrinkled grandpas.
I sent this note to Big John Cornwyn about his views on this matter
“By requesting that citizens send “fishy” emails to the White House, it is inevitable that the names, email addresses, IP addresses, and private speech of U.S. citizens will be reported to the White House. You should not be surprised that these actions taken by your White House staff raise the specter of a data collection program. As Congress debates health care reform and other critical policy matters, citizen engagement must not be chilled by fear of government monitoring the exercise of free speech rights.
I can only imagine the level of justifiable outrage had your predecessor asked Americans to forward emails critical of his policies to the White House. I suspect that you would have been leading the charge in condemning such a program–and I would have been at your side denouncing such heavy-handed government action.” - John Cornyn
Dear Senator Cornyn
You know Mr. Cornyn I wanted a pic of you to masturbate all over but after hearing about you saying that the President has a hit list and going with the extreme nutcases in our party well I think I’ll have to find somene else to enjoy myself over.
Sincerely
Tom
I hope I broke his heart.
american mutt: fat tired republican shitbirds
boinggg: now that’s a real actor. I don’t even think he’s republican in real life.
FUnny coincidence - when Nixon invented the enemies list way back when, Fred Thompson was working as a Jew-counter on the Judicial committee. Yeah, it’s true!
imissopus: Ah, another “before my time” thing. Between this and Ginsberg, and I’m not even technically YOUNG anymore. You people, and your arthritis meds….
Noodle Salad: A useless ellipsis is fine; it allows people who find periods too threatening to finish their sentences in the vague and inconclusive way they like to live their modern, digital lives.
And by “people” I mean “me.”
However, using an ellipsis *after* an exclamation point is fucking deranged.
“Fred? Hey, Freddie, it’s your agent, Swifty Goldman here. Hey, that new show, “Law and Order: Winguts” called, and they offered you that part, at 700,000 grand a year, babe! I know it’s TV, and the movies pay you double that, but this is a promising show, and you can always do two films in the off-season! Let me know, babe! Oh,and Fred, STAY OFF THE DAMN TWITTER THING PLEASE. Thanks!”
Yes, if it wasn’t for Twitter, no one would know that Fred Thompson is opposed to the President.
gurukalehuru: One reason that won’t happen: There’s not enough Cialis in the world to get Fred “ready for that special moment.”
AnnieGetYourFun: Well, I’m guessing based on what I know about Watergate. I was born a week and a half before Nixon resigned, so my memories of it are fuzzy for reasons other than all the vodka tonics.
Bearbloke: It could be worse - he could be 9iu11iani. Flushed away $50 million of OPM for a single delegate.
What was Fred Thompson’s motivation for this scene?
I bet he thinks Twitter is some really difficult thing to master, that only “smart” people know how to use it, and that people can’t wait to read what “words of wisdom” he has to give.
Single payer
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Medicare for all
Big Pharma on diet
Zero insurance profit
No deductible & no co-pay
Off the table? Just like Impeachment was?!
Left and rights of passage, black and whites of youth.
Who can face the knowledge that the truth is not the truth?
Obsolete absolute.
Anthrax Intimidation.
JFK RFK MLK Malcolm.
Israel-first dual-nationals.
InfoWars on a PrisonPlanet?
A very RawStory on PressTV.
Whistle-Blower leaks multiply.
Beware the divide and conquer.
Both parties are corrupt to the core.
Honesty compassion conscience guts.
Speak no evil, hear no evil, see no evil?
Elite Ruling Class Greed or “public servants”?
Independents agree on more than we disagree.
AIPAC 9/11 Bankers Extortion Blackmail Bribery.
Wall Street Bailout Bill: Bush McCain Obama et al.
Poodles, Puppets, Sham debates, & Scam elections.
Has the Government & Propaganda Media lied to you?
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.
Chronic lying as career path, intellectual prostitution for paycheck.
DNC & RNC have both sold out the country in order to enrich themselves.
Future of a Nation that can not trust the Government & Propaganda Media?
Realignment of American Politics:
Anderson Baldwin Carter Choate Clemente Gonzalez Gravel Kaptur Kucinich McKinney Nader Paul Perot Sheehan Ventura