Mike Huckabee To Become Fat Again

Poor Southern hobo and the 2008 GOP primary's most potent premature ejaculation, Mike Huckabee, first made waves on the national stage when his fat ass lost hundreds of pounds on some kind of "diet-and-exercise" regimen. He wrote a book about this and most people read it several times. Even through the hectic presidential campaign, Huckabee made sure to run his miles every morning, to preserve that sexy mass of dangling excess skin he had worked so tirelessly to create. But now, he claims, he is so busy criticizing Barack Obama that he hasfallen off the wagonand will soon weigh millions of pounds again.

Perhaps the various political experts have urged Huckabee to give up this elitist "skinny" image he loves so much. While it may have helped him get his name in the papers at first, those days are over, and if he's seriously considering another dash through the Republican primary calendar, base voters will connect more with a fat, sweaty slob.

Here's what he told the folks at Oklahoma Christian University who came to hear him call Barack Obama a socialist:

Huckabee first gained national attention while he was governor of Arkansas and was admittedly overweight. While in office he began a running and diet regimen that enabled him to lose his extra weight.

He said keeping the weight off has been a struggle recently.

“It’s been hard the last several months because of the crazy schedule and I have had some issues with (feet),” Huckabee said. “It’s a constant struggle to find decent things to eat on the road and not get terribly messed up with the same old habits.”

Weak sauce, Mike. We recommend you read a book calledQuit Digging Your Grave With A Knife And Forkby Mike Huckabee. He stresses how important it is, no matter the circumstances, toforceyourself to eat healthily and squeeze in exercise time -- one small excuse, and it's a slippery slope! (Well he probably writes something like that in his book, who the hell knows?)

 Huckabee criticizes health care plans [Edmond Sun]