Soothsaying raconteur Martin Peretz has a little story for you. Come children, gather ye rosebuds, for it is time to hear the sorry tale of Sidney Blumenthal, who is, at this very moment, maybe already on Hillary Clinton’s travel diplomacy team! You see, Blumenthal once worked for Peretz at the New Republic magazine, a “The Spine” avant la lettre, if you will. Despite knowing absolutely nothing about foreign policy (or literally anything) and overcoming his debilitating addiction to borrowing $3000 from Peretz and not paying him back, Blumenthal ascended the ranks of Peretz’s Arabic-language fiction quarterly! Â Sacre Blume!
But that was before. And this is now. And Peretz wants Hillary Clinton to know she would be a foolish fool to hire Blumenthal, exactly as Peretz did:
“AÂ very knowledgeable person informed me that Hillary has had second thoughts about Sidney. No one ever said the lady was stupid. So maybe he won’t really be on the federal payroll, after all. In which case he can compete with his progeny for space on the far left blogosphere.
Or do hagiography at the Wlliam J. Clinton Presidential Library in Dog Patch.”
In other words, it’s really imperative that Blumenthal stop trying to flee the country and instead do the right thing by getting an internship that will allow him to earn back the $3000 he borrowed from Peretz 25 years ago.
{ 37 comments }
I’m first! I’m first! But I don’t have anything to say about this.
[re=361871]kizmets_adjutant[/re]: Well, then I guess you will be banned.
[re=361871]kizmets_adjutant[/re]: That isn’t done here.
Who are these people again? I should care about Hillary’s faithful retainers?
Hearing this story makes me totally hot for Peretz, also. Really.
Why do the Hebrews so furiously rage together?
Meee-OW!
I’m not first. Also.
Listen, this story is way to confusing and name-dropey for my miniscule librul attention span. More pix of Huma pls.
How does Peretz manage to sit at his computer and type with that stick so far up his ass?
I always get the TNR mixed up with the DNR. Which one is supposed to be an important magazine that nobody reads and which one sells fishing licenses? Marty does look like the guy who sold me three dozen nightcrawlers in Indiana over the Fourth–is that a clue?
[re=361872]Ken Layne[/re]: You were first!
Sacre Blume? Now I will always imagine Sidney B walking around with a crown of daisies on his head, like an extra in A Midsummer Night’s Dream.
[re=361872]Ken Layne[/re]: Swift justice!
[re=361895]Noodle Salad[/re]: DNR = Do Not Resuscitate? TNR was/is a neocon vanity-publication that was an ENTHUSIASTIC SUPPORTER of the Iraq War. And they got mad at Gregg Easterbrook for saying there’s a stereotype of Jews liking money, because Uma Thurman made him (Easterbrook) hot in “Kill Bill” and he didn’t like those particular starbursts.
Dogpatch? Bloomie must be over the moon about working in Dogpatch. Now he can daily enjoy the good eats to be had at this totally nice-sounding restaurant that operates at lunch time out the back of a loading dock. I would eat there every day if I ate meat and lived near Dogpatch.
As for the $3000, who the fuck holds a grudge that long? I’d refuse to pay it back now on principle (heh,) just because Marty’s been such a dick about it. I guess Peretz never learned that being petty about money and friendships makes the petty person look like an ass. But from what I can gather Peretz doesn’t have a lot of friends anyway. Or shouldn’t.
[re=361872]Ken Layne[/re]: BANNED! Oh the tyranny! It’s just like those ultra-libruhls to throw civil rights out the window whenever they are threatened, or in this case, annoyed.
A petty dispute between East Coast Jewish “intellectuals”, neither of whom deserves a great deal of attention. If I had to choose, though, I’d side with Blumenthal, if only because he once sued Matt Drudge.
[re=361872]Ken Layne[/re]: Aww, Ken. You big meanie.
The guy couldn’t help himself, its just so incredibly awesome to be the first commenter.
[re=361903]V572625694[/re]: Ah, that’s right. The DNR = Department of Natural Resources, where you can get your licenses for hunting, fishing, Cheney baiting, and pumpkin catapulting. In the case of the TNR, however, your acronym is probably more apropos.
[re=361877]honkyman[/re]: That is the way we are. Just better than the rest of you and we are always trying to get better. I’m sure this is snark- but if not- Hebrew is a language- not what we are.
Didn’t Blumenthal work for in the Clinton Administration, like, sixteen years ago? Wouldn’t that have been the time for Marty to bust out his “DO NOT HIRE THIS DEADBEAT” screed?
Filed under: Wonkette reads ‘em, so I don’t have to. Thanks, Juli.
Is this guy related to Perez Hilton? Cuz they kinda look and sound similar.
Who’s responsible for Peretz’s unfortunate existence?
Blumenthal should send $3,000 to the most innocuous Jewish charity in existence and mail a copy of the receipt to Peretz with a note telling Peretz that he donated it to this charity in his name.
It wouldn’t make the Peretz head explode (nothing would by now) but should get some smoke from his ears.
[re=361904]hobospacejunkie[/re]: I used to live in Dogpatch, and still swing by there occasionally (for drugs and welding equipment.)
While the “spontaneous covert organic nourishment” of the meals-on-wheels operation you noted does indeed have its charms, if you really want a place that will leave you with a full belly and beastly bowels, I’d recommend parking your posterior on some split vinyl at this here greasy spoon.
[re=361903]V572625694[/re]: Not really neocon. Neocons go in for the whole Newt/Rumsfeld ball of wax, tax cuts, American exceptionalism, et. al. TNR is fairly center-left, except about Saddam or any other Ay-rab threat to Izrul. For the record, I agreed with them at the time about accelerating the (already extant since the late ’90s) war from air strikes against missile batteries to ground invasion, in order to rid the world of a particularly warbent, odious dictator. But I paid for my sins by serving in Baghdad for a year. What’s Marty done?
Pretzels is just mad b/c Blumenthal’s son goes around taping Israelis when they say racist things – matter of fact, exactly the same kinds of things Pretzels posts on his blog everyday.
Also, Marty Peretz was great in RoboCop.
Sidney Blumenthal also refused to sign Putz’s dance card at the Clinton White House spring cotillion.
The Peretz piece was initially response to this absolutely fantastic Tina Brown article.
http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-07-13/obamas-other-wife-1
Did you know Obama is basically a Saudi Sheikh who keeps second wife, namely Hillary, on a leash and makes her wear a burka? I didn’t.
The who the what, now? I have a prejudice, admittedly irrational, against men with ‘Sidney’ as one of their names. It reminds me of Sidney Reilly, noted spy fantasist. Oh, wait! That would include JSM. Bummers.
No one ever said Martin Peretz was stupid, either… Wait, actually, they have. Repeatedly.
I loved it when Marty Peretz yelled at Steve Coogan in Tropic Thunder.
Well, maybe the 3 large was for the ass-fucking Bloomie had to put up with, as did all of Peretz’s boyz.
[re=361916]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Did you patronize the Jalop? Haven’t seen you around those parts. The whole site has kinda gone to hell, hasn’t it?
I still remember Marty following the IDF into Lebanon back in 1982 and writing his breathless “I WAS THERE” article for the New Republic, informing us that everything we were reading and seeing on TV about the invasion was a lie and the IDF was being greeted as liberators.
For this, he got the nickname “Camp follower”
(Norman Podhoretz followed up with his “J’Accuse” cover for Commentary that had the misfortune to hit the stands the weekend the IDF let the Phalange into the Palestinian refugee camps to massacre the unarmed left behind>0
[re=362345]StoneAge[/re]: Now that you mention it, I don’t, much. It’s kinda cluttered these days, in’t it?
I used to spend more time there than here. I think I realized I was spending too much time.
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