Wonkette
The world will always remember the day when the Obama presidency began its tragic downward spiral: the day that Dr. Sanjay Gupta, television’s handsomest authority on thyroid pills, decided that he wanted to “spend more time with his family” rather than Serve the Nation as surgeon general. Since then, Obama has been helplessly casting about looking for America’s Doctor and finding nothing but a swarm of venal insurance industry whores in white coats.
Until today! He announced that Dr. Regina Benjamin, in spite of a rather embarrassing lack of television shows, would be the new surgeon general. Dr. Benjamin is from Alabama, where the number one prescribed therapy for most ailments is “night crawlers.” She will be awesome!
Obama Selects Alabama Doctor as Surgeon General [Washington Post]
Bring back the bearded guy.
I think the Surgeon General should live up to their name and command an army of surgeons that go into dicey areas of the world and perform appendectomies with extreme prejudice.
I think I saw the Amish surgeon general on a Life Alert commercial. He appears to be giving a contemporaneous endorsement of the Life Alert system, which is somewhat strange given that he died in his bathtub in an isolated farmhouse in Central Pennsylvania in 1991.
She won a MacArthur Foundation Genius Grant plus shes black WHOOT!
Oh boy, over on huffpo the commenters are at war over this poor woman’s apparent weight. Can Jezebel be far behind?
Let’s hope she’s not been making up Healthcare cost numbers in a pathetic attempt to bullshit Michael Moore and not infuriated the GOPers and Fundies by telling them to masturbate more instead of screwing underaged kids/looking for sex in male bathrooms.
norbizness: Billy Mays is still selling crap from beyond the grave, why not him too?
I dunno about this one. She looks a tad Muslin.
Holy five-head
“Night crawlers”? Out here in California, we call that the missionary position…
Surgeons general are figureheads and she has a fine figure. At least she’s unlikely to simply urge people to eat less.
She looks nice and seems well educated, plus she’s AA. Screaming rant from the right in 5..4..3..
One of her predecessors was pretty adamant about buffing the iguana as an alternative to sexytime. What’s this one’s position on, say, Fleshlights? The youth of America are waiting for guidance, Dr. Benjamin!
paintitblack: I would hope that a wise African American woman with the richness of her experiences would, more often than not, make a better medical decision than a white male doctor.
paintitblack: REVERSE RACISM! AHHH! SHE’S JUST GETTING THE JOB BECAUSE SHE’S BLACK!! RABBLE RABBLE!
Jeffrey Rosen has a good piece against this new nominee who is clearly a Dumb. Well, he was going to do a good piece, but didn’t really have time. But a bunch of people who may or may not have known or ever worked with Ms. Benjamin said she tends to be all sassy and brown and “mmhmm” while neck twirling.
norbizness: …command an army of surgeons…
but they wear Navy uniforms … maybe could lead a squadron of surgeons to perform appendectomies on pirates?
some kind of Master and Commander kind of thing?
Well that only took 6+ months. Hopey better be careful or he’s gonna complete his cabinet before his first term’s up.
BOOOO!!! She’s not as hot as Sanjay, therefore she is unqualified for this position.
I didn’t realize Dr. Gupta had removed himself from consideration to spend more time with his family. So, who was he screwing on the side?
Does she pronounce Regina the dumb US American way or the cool, sounds like shmagina, Canadian way?
The Republicans are going to pick up on that she seems to be somewhat careless:
NPR - “On Jan. 1, [2006] Dr. Regina Benjamin’s rural health clinic in Bayou La Batre, Ala., was destroyed by a fire. The clinic was preparing to reopen after repairs that followed severe damage from Hurricane Katrina.”
Do we really want person like this holding the nation’s scalpel? Think about it.
Is General Benjamin any relation to that Private Benjamin that used to be on TV? I think she was blonde and kinda goofy.
This woman is obviously racist against white people with normal foreheads. How dare Nobama try to slide this through while everyone else is watching the Sotomayor execution.
She’s already wearing the “spurned-wife-at-the-press-conference” uniform, in that jpeg. This cannot be a good sign.
Were Drs. Drew and/or Phil not available??
Was Patrick Dempsey not willing to give up his actor gig?
Coburn ended his remarks with “God bless you.” He was acting as an ordained minister, so these remarks will be stricken from the record, since they are protected by the religious confidentiality privilege. Now he will inspect her ladyparts as cheif OB/GYN of the Judiciary Committee.
Come here a minute: Get a brain, moran.
rereridiculous: Muslin aint a race,and aint neither socialism or that other what not the ‘preeznit’ is, ya ignint yokel. What this here is is aliens, but not the messican kind. Cuz messicans is Catholic and human to boot, and don’t go around probin ‘Muhrkin anuses. See, s’all bout gay murge.
Repuke anxiety has just gone to 11.
We are gonna die.
Boone, we’re the only white people in here.
Why does Wonkette have to lie so. The number one prescribed treatment in Alabama is God.
Uh-huh, just as I thought: Barry X chooses yet ANOTHER color-y person to elevate to an exalted position in his mad regime. What, he can’t find any decent WHITE people to do anything? Why oh why does our socialist president insist upon KEEPING THE WHITE MAN DOWN???!!!
Number two is Witches, number three is night crawlers.
He is trying to score points with the LGBT crowd by appointing a non-passable tranny.
Lionel Hutz Esq.: 4: Exorcisms.
I look forward to this woman totally banning the words ‘acai berry’ from American English.
Yet another brain drain. Alabama will have two veterinarians and a deep tissue masseur named Floyd.
Trial by Fire Issue: Colon elasticity and DIY vegan assplay.
Jeez, that forehead! I wonder if she’d try to sell the space for advertising to some big health insurance company. Or maybe Life Alert.
Yahoo! Alabama in the news for something good - someone has made a mistake.
The only downside is there will be no one to care of working class folks in the next hurricane.
No surgeon general will ever be hotter than C. Everett Koop. And you know the C stands for “Chick”
tehbenton: She gets a pass by me as my iguana’s buffed and shiny.
How smart can this Dr-Woman REALLY be?? She lived in FUCKING ALABAMA!!
Her clinic is in Bayou La Batre, Alabama. That’s Forest Gump’s hometown!
Rev. Peter Lemonjello: Sorry, but you’re forgetting snakes. Number 4 is snakes. Exorcism is number 5.
You laugh, but nightcrawlers cured my syphilis.
Oh, how long before the Republicans start calling her “Satan” because, you know, not white.
Will she encourage me to masturbate more?
Rev. Peter Lemonjello: Exorcisms is #1 in nearby Louisiana where Governor Sanjay Gupta wannabe Piyush Jindal performs them regularly.
hobospacejunkie: A doctor should obviously pronounce Regina to rhyme with “angina” and “vagina”. What rhymes with Regeena? Worst of all would be if she pronounced it like my great aunt, (Ruh-GHEE-nuh).
Godless Liberal: More than encouraged, it will be mandated (this is Socialist US America after all).
MzNicky: Speaking as a white man, it is all cool with us, just as long as we are in charge of the money. (See Goldman Sacks earnings report out today, thanks Berry, we be cool.)
(Of course as one who spends his time reading Wonkette et al. I myself got nothing except race pride and some hobo beans.)
Tribute to Barack Obamao… 44th chairman…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cOmII3dn9A&eurl=http://mitchellblatt.com/blog/2009/07/propublica-liberal-advocacy&feature=player_embedded
WHAT!!! Am I gettin it right? Oba-mao, the 44th chairman, Of the socialist states of America, has appointed a voodoo priestess for healthcare? Doomsday…
Voyou Charmant: I LoLed.
Oh great, now we’re going to spend all our health budget on curing people with abnormally large foreheads.
Regina Benjamin and she’s not a Jew? I was expecting a certifiable Jew; give me my Jew, goddamnit!
I should have known, though. Silly me; their aint’ no Jews in Banjobama. Also.
Props to Joycelyn Elders.