Wonkette
Here’s a very special Email of the Night, starring somebody who must’ve come across a confusing link to your Wonkette on some wingnut message board. We’ve seen a handful of these “referencing nothing in particular” upset emails in the latter half of the week, but as usual there is no way to decipher what exactly attracted the confused ire. Tonight’s terse epistle was sent out on the Internets at exactly 11:07 PM, on a Friday night. So lonely!
from r.s.
to “ken@wonkette.com”
date Fri, Jul 10, 2009 at 11:07 PM
subject Th WonketteThis is not journalism this is crap. How can you put words in peoples mouth and then write about it. That is not American, neither is your intolerance of others’ opinions. I say Boo.
Frank
Again with the “writin’s not amurican” followed by the “yer intolerant!” Everybody’s Mike Huckabee these days, at least in the Obese States of America.
Or, in the famous words of that psychopath Kevin Kline played in A Fish Called Wanda, “No, you’re the vulgarian, you fuck!”
Did he not see that hard hitting analysis of Sarah Palin leaving that poor moose? Wonkette is the best journalism on the Interwebs.
Right…Wonkette even gave a prime time foreign news coverage on Indian election…which news agency does that?
Wait a minute. How do we know that “r.s.” wasn’t just responding to one of the many craig’s list casual encounters advertisements I’ve been posting in Ken’s name? And, yes, crap figured prominently in most of the aforementioned advertisements.
I’m surprised you didn’t mention that “r.s.” is obviously Richard Shelby, the only male Republican Senator who doesn’t have at least one mistress, which is why he has time to say Boo to you on a Friday night.
Todd Mecklem: Plus, he’s bitter that David Brooks rejected his advances.
At least he didn’t hiss.
The “Boo” part hurts. Hurts.
Also: Hoping that Frank wiped the smeg from his lips before he wrote that. Still, it hurts.
Dear Frank, That wasn’t ‘words’ I put in your mouth; and that wasn’t ‘writing about it’ I was doing afterwards.
Boo! back atcha.
Roscoe
Intolerance of r.s.’s crap is not American. I think I’m gonna be OK with that.
Heard Michael Jackson is not feeling well. I hope he perks up, but I’m sick to death of hearing “Thriller”. Give it a rest!
Ken’s allright with me. He’s intolerant and un-merkin, and he puts words in the mouths of babes, if that’s all he can get.
Why “Boo?”
saggyboobedhag: B is for Boo.
~
OK, so this retarded fuck managed to accuse Wonkette of shoddy journalism, misattribution of quotes, insufficient patriotism and a distinct lack of opinions from the fringe right wing of the political spectrum: all this before his crayon either ground down to nothing or snapped in his angry, fat little fingers? I call bullshit. He obviously enlisted his parents, Michael and Sharon Ensign, to aid him in this taxing endeavor.
Yeah Kuh kuh kuh Ken!
Tonight we are all **(Journalists)**. I believe the fellow who replaced Trig’s head with a cowbell should win some type of blogging pulitzer.
Obviously, r.s. is unaware that in a large segment of our diverse U.S. of A., “boo” is a term of endearment.
Hey - give the guy some credit - “subject Th Wonkette” is some pretty high snark.
Maybe r.s. stands for ‘real smart’. Ya think?
saggyboobedhag: Boo who?
i need to see ‘public enemies’ again.
“rs” is obviously birther Senator Richard Shelby complaining about, uh, the “Barack checkin’ out tha booty” photo, most likely.
I got a special treasure tonight, too:
“I’m not a stupid person IQ130, so why did I vote for this Obama nut, makes me kind of wonder what the hell i was thinking about !! I know where all supposed to like ourselfs, but i bet the first thing this guy does in the morning is rush to the bathroom mirror and admire himself !! But then again he probally has one on the ceiling right over his bed and admires himself all night along taking turns depending on who’s on top him or Michelle ! This cock of a walk calling himself president, scares the bejusus out me…..This guy spends our money like Michael Jackson did when he was alive, but at least the boy/man spent his own money not ours !! Here a stimulus package there a stimulus package, old Mcobama had a farm e i e i o !!!! The few remaining sane one’s around after his first term is over, better hope it’s just that one strike and your out, i just changed the rules sue me. I know where not talking baseball here, we need a pinch hitter, I look to my bench, there sits” foot in mouth joe Biden” “, and Nancy tight ass Pelosi,” i begin to whimper then cry then wail untill they finally take me away !!! What mental hospital will i wind in, none, Why? Because they closed them all a long, long time ago, letting the deranged roam nilly willy, and where did these meandering crackpots wind up, no, no you dote, not in Hawii, thats right Washington DC. where did those damn tissues go!!!”
Oh, don’t click on my link if the link ban is back on. So hard to keep track. Also.
Here I am purchasing grow-room supplies and this person is talking to Ken. My priorities are messed up. I also need a carbon filter also.
Jim Newell: I think IQ 131 is where you learn ourselfs is not a word. Not sure when you get capital letters, or single exclamation points.
Jim Newell: “letting the deranged roam nilly willy”
Bingo.
Oh, dear, Mr. Newell. That one would make me check the cyberwindow- and door-locks.
Is Boo the name of the latest Palin offspring?
Jim Newell: “and I look in the bullpen and there’s nothing but crazy israeli Rahm “” Emanuel, and he’s missing a finger no less, and can’t throw a ball for nothing,” What we need’s is Antonio Alfonseca, who had six fingers, I’ll tell you what, he’s throw hard, some kind of crazy curvball that gets us out of this mess, thats some real stimulus. But *((Gotta put First Things First))* I look up in the stand’s and in the box seats there’s some pink shirted queer trying to take his picture with John Boner, now where’s more tissues, fap!”!”!
Wet Work: Boo hoo hoo.
Jim Newell: Didn’t Reagan close the mental hospitals? Now look what’s happened. Some PUMA voted for Obama by mistake and it deranged him.
booooourrrns!
Jesus, Newell, is the moon full over your sky tonight? May I state the obvious? 130? Ha ha ha ha ha, lets pull a random number out of our lizard brain, like our weight soaking wet, then follow it with shit like ourselfs and where for we’re. I don’t know a single person who’s ever taken an IQ test, as if it were an objective measure of anything. He must have paid $250 for an online five-question IQ test on a site selling real live Mensa-approved IQ certificates, along with authentic diplomas from Alcapulco med school. What a rube. Thanks for the laffs, genius. Don’t quit your day job at the TSA.
Lord Growing: PREPARE TO DIE!
“scares the bejusus out me” a good one–I think I’ll start using that from now on.
Ken, Jim, have you been mocking the powerful and moranic again? Are we going to have to take your Blog away? You know your mother and I only said you could have one if you maintained a level of journalistic integrity greater than Fox News.
That’s all one has to write to get a letter printed on Wonkette?
Expect several hundred emails soon.
im not a stupid person 2 english degrees i cant believe i voted for cyborg for wonder woman for mayor seriously she spends all this money on this invisible jet wooshing around and she wont even wear something that would let me see her can
Jim Newell: Sorry Jim, that sounds like my dad’s rantings. I had to un-friend him on facebook. Guess I’m out of the will now.
Jim Newell: Worst case of Spam Filter FAIL I’ve ever seen.
Alternatively, this could be someone who will soon be receiving many, many Pedo-Furrie-NAMBLA-Freeper subscriptions.
Hah! FAIL again. Already has them, obvs.
Jim Newell: Wow, “no you dote” … that’s a winner.
Clearly ‘Frank’ is a pseudonym for Sarah Palin.
joeybrill: Love the ‘Happy Hollisters’ ref in your handle. I’m an old.
Jukesgrrl: My daughter used “dote” for “don’t” in a note she wrote to me when she was 5. Does that mean she has an IQ of 500 or so now that she’s 19?!
Wet Work: r.s. = Red State
Frank doesn’t like that Wonkette doesn’t like what Frank likes. The un-’Murkin intolerance is all ours, not his.
Well, I have an IQ of 76 and you don’t see me bragging about it.
IQ numbers are like golf scores, right?
Jim Newell: Tortured sports analogy = Sarah Palin’s sending you e-mails!
I think we are missing the Randy Newman reference: “”You dote know what love is…I know what love is”
Hedley Lamar: Appropriately enough, the last book in ths Happy Hollisters series was entitled: “The Happy Hollisters and the Mystery of the Midnight Trolls.”
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Happy_Hollisters
Jim Newell: The spaces before the ! are what makes it art.
Denby, trying to gain egress into the alcohol-induced, snarkified-febrile minds of Layne and Newell, went full flyover-country retard with teh grammarz.
And it would have worked, if it wasn’t for you meddlesome kids!
Jim Newell: If Meghan turns down Ken’s guest-editor offer while he’s trying to find a way to hike through Camp Pendleton, I’d say Mr. IQ130 deserves a shot. Much entertainment there.
wallythepug: I know a *lot* of people who’ve had to unfriend their parents on Facebook. “Hide” is a better option, though. Then they don’t know you’ve blissfully pulled the switch on their rantings. I’ve “hidden” a dear dear friend who is on too many psych meds right now. They give him the energy to make about 50 alarmingly meandering posts about music and reality each day.
Just for the record, apropos of nothing much here: too many psych meds is sometimes much worse than not enough, at least for us bystanders. Did this nutjob really need a ton of Chemical Confidence?
At first I thought Jim’s guy was the same as the Mensa member on Daily Kos’s hate mailapalooza last week, but the style is different, though the genius is the same.
I’m not a stupid person (yes, you are)IQ130 (sorry, no), so why did I vote for this Obama nut(seemed like a good idea at the time), makes me kind of wonder what the hell i was thinking about (hope and change, baby, hope and change)!! I know where all supposed to like ourselfs, (and I know where the wild things are)but i bet the first thing this guy does in the morning is rush to the bathroom mirror and admire himself (hell, I do that, too, and I’m fat and bald. You don’t do that?)!! But then again he probally has one on the ceiling right over his bed and admires himself all night along taking turns depending on who’s on top him or Michelle (O.K., you’ve kind of got me interested there)! This cock of a walk (is that a good thing or a bad thing?)calling himself president (He’s not calling himself President, jerkoff, he’s the fucking President. Get used to it.), scares the bejusus out me…(bejusus?)..This guy spends our money like Michael Jackson did when he was alive, but at least the boy/man spent his own money not ours (Wait till Barry starts with the plastic surgery)! Here a stimulus package there a stimulus package, old Mcobama had a farm e i e i o !!!! (that really doesn’t work, now, does it?)The few remaining sane one’s around after his first term is over, better hope it’s just that one strike and your out, i just changed the rules sue me. (we are not Sarah Palin)I know where not talking baseball here (I know where there’s a great Chinese restaurant), we need a pinch hitter, I look to my bench, there sits” foot in mouth joe Biden” (Do you know how this capitalization thing works?)“, and Nancy tight ass Pelosi,”(you can do better than that with Nancy - how about “The Botoxed Babichka, or Crazy Eyes) i begin to whimper then cry then wail untill they finally take me away (please)!!! What mental hospital will i wind (down?) in, none, Why? Because they closed them all a long, long time ago, letting the deranged roam nilly willy( it was Reagan who closed the mental hospitals, you wit nit), and where did these meandering crackpots wind up, no, no you dote, not in Hawii, thats right Washington DC. where did those damn tissues go!!!”
This letter was a cry for help.
This guy “Frank” may be the last innocent on the face of the Earth. Leave him alone.
My browser must be broken because all I get on the Wonkette site is the commentary, the links to other sources and photoshops of Franken in diapers. The closest thing to journalism and investigative reporting is Riley’s latest on the Washington interns. So until Julie comes back with the videos of the CIA program that Pelosi wasn’t told about I am going to give r.s. partial credit for the first half of the first sentence. The rest is just pillow-talk during r.s.’s masturbation session.
Ahhh, I love the smell of dissipation in the morning! Mr. Newell, with this expose about the truly mentally gifted/challenged, you have shared some of your most primo shit. Thank you. I would love to begin a real dialogue with IQ-130 because I feel that we need options– I’m tired of the same ol’ Snowbilly and JTP. We need fresher moran meat.
Hey GOP, we’ve got a live one for you!
Hey, we in Colorado have just been told that every other state is now the “Obese States of America.” Please help our skinny asses out. More cheese fries please.
Maus: I was saying “Boo-urns.”
Stop dissing Boo Radley! Why does this person hate the disabled? Is that why that other mentally challenged person wrote to Jim Newell? To protest this disgusting attack on those less fortunate? Ize confuzuled…
Jim Newell: IQ 130, eh? This is the same guy who tells women he’s got a 10″ dick.
AFTER READING SOME OF THE THOUGHTS PEOPLE SEND TO ME, I MUST NOW AGREE WITH WHAT THAT MAN IS SAYING TO JIM NEWELL. AFTER ALL, IF YOU GET ENOUGH WEIRD HATE MAIL, IT CHANGES YOUR PERSPECTIVE ON THINGS.
FIRST OF ALL, OBAMA AND NANCY PELOSI ARE CLEARLY SLEEPING TOGETHER WITH SATAN AND HAVE CARRIED THEIR REPTILIAN AGENDA TO THE THRALLS OF PERIL FOR OUR COUNTRY. WE DON’T EVEN LIVE IN A CUNTRY ANYMORE, IT IS ALL REPTILES.
YOU MUST LOOK INTO THE THEORIES. DAVID ICKES MAKES MANY GOOD POINTS ON THE SUBJECT. THAT IS JOURNALISM. WONKETTE IS NOT COVERING THESE FAKTS. THEREFORE NOT JOURNALISM.
Jim Newell: ” But then again he probally has one on the ceiling right over his bed and admires himself all night along taking turns depending on who’s on top him or Michelle ! ”
Dude says this like it’s a bad thing.
Methinks both Ken and Jim grew up without Mom, Apple Pie and impregnating girls in the back seat of a U.S. made muscle car. How pathetically unpatriotic. You uncaring, snarkastic bastards. You scare the bejebus out of real Mericuns.
Wonkette is my spiritual and ethical compass. Whenever I’m faced with a moral dilemma, I ask myself that all-important, timeless question: “What would Riley do?”
Then I think “Eh, who cares?” and get on with my life.
Are these like blind items? Okay, the first one was from Carrie Prejean. The second, obviously a cut and paste from Chuck Norris’ blog at WND.
Hell-lo, Kuh-kuh-kuh-Ken’s Puh-puh-puh-pets!
What is this journalism of which he speaks?
Jim Newell: Had me at stupid.
C-C-C-C-C-Combo breaker!.
Frank! Get me the pork roll egg and cheese, if you please!
Today, we are all being booed.
shortsshortsshorts: Apparently this is also Journalism…
http://www.ninjapirate.com/ann_coulter.html
Is that “boooooooooo” as in a long, drawn out articulation of disappooooval or “Boo!” as in “Surprise!”?
Personally, I’m going with the short and terse, “Boo!” I like that better; it’s kinda fun.
Also. Boo!
greywindz: So is this:
http://ifuckedanncoulterintheasshard.blogspot.com/?zx=ef70f29cd2c0e46c
And he wrecked it good.
TJBeck: or did he confuse his nethers over which “Barry” adopted [a href="http://wonkette.com/409728/marion-barrys-life-continues-to-be-gross-misogynistic-joke"]stalking[/A] as his new hobby?
Jim Newell: Sorry, Jim. I lose all sense of coherence when I’m high. Won’t happen again. Boy is my face red.
“All the ladies in the house say BOO!” doesn’t have quite the same ring.
gurukalehuru: Glenn is that you??
Min: An ancient voodoo long since fallen into disrepute. “Journalism” required the stories the powerful concoct for our edification and amusement be checked for something called “accuracy”. It was frightfully inconvenient and therefor done away with long ago.
He said BOO to our beloved Wonkette high-priest! Fighting words, I say!!! time for a light of the long knives type rooting-out of all folks with the initials r.s.
We should go and egg Frank’s house/trailer.
“They’re not booing, they’re chanting Loooooouuu!” I always loved hearing the Scooter Phil Rizzuto say that when Yankees manager Lou Pinella came out on the field. Of course, half the time they were booing.
rocktonsammy: That’s okay, his mother sits in a crib pleading for eggs, which the Eggman delivers.
rambone: I sit down for just a second on my way to bed, read shit like this and laugh so hard I pee my pants.
And that is why wonkette is evil. I’m sure that’s what that guy meant.
Which begs the question I asked on another thread I never bothered checking back on, do the wingers make fun of wonkette in a way that’s funny? Or just lob insults?
Jim Newell: How drunk was this semi-literate? Damn, I’m always onto shit late and everyone is gone. Another reason my life is fucked.
Jim Newell: yes, he has an IQ of 131, something his teachers I am sure told him often. They just didn’t tell him they were using base 4 number system. (giving him an IQ of 29)
saggyboobedhag:
Why “Boo!”???
Isn’t that what ghosts say, or those dressed up as ghosts in white sheets, say?
rocktonsammy: Does his mom really deserve the eggs pelting her house?
DustBowlBlues: Go over to Red State.org. They’re just as confused about what libtards are like as Sarah Palin, so their insults are kind of funny, as we are all “elitist pansies who live in New York City” according to them.