- A Wells Fargo spokesman said that “Banks are not and cannot be the solution to California’s budget problems.” Indeed, banks have not been the solution to anybody’s problems for quite some time! [San Francisco Chronicle]
- Iranian protesters turned out in smaller numbers yesterday commemorating the tenth anniversary of the student uprisings, and police and the paramilitary were once again fairly nasty about crowd control. [CNN]
- The Fed didn’t do such a hot job protecting consumers for many years, so now some people are wondering if some other agency shouldn’t take on the job. [Washington Post]
- GM has emerged from bankruptcy a new, healthy, vibrant, refocused business, as evidenced by their possible switch from a blue logo to a green logo. [Associated Press]
- President Obama just can’t get anything done on healthcare or climate change, summer slump, this guy is a loser, etc. [Reuters]
- Another study on calorie restriction suggests that reducing one’s diet (if one is a monkey) to near-starvation level will increase the quantity, if not the quality, of one’s life. [Wall Street Journal]
DAILY BRIEFING
July 10, 2009
Green Shoots (From GM)
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{ 25 comments }
Agree on the quantity versus quality of life thing. Give those monkeys a regular supply of homemade ice cream and baked good from CakeLove. Sure, you may shave off a day or two of their lives, but they’ll love living the days they have.
I prefer alcohol as the cause of and solution to all of life’s problems. Banks? Not so much. A sometimes necessary evil that should be kept in a cage and have feces thrown at it till it’s needed and then once done, put right back into it’s cage so as never to receive no adulation, recognition or respect that a bank so deserves.
Want to live a long life? Eat REAL food not frozen, over-processed, chemically enhanced with “flavors” junk food that really is nothing but starch. Find a butcher who can cut you a real steak off of a side of beef. Butter is better…just ask Paula Deen!
Good Morning!
Holy Crap! Have you all seen the best picture EVER? Scroll down & look at Prez & Sarkozy checking this girl out!
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/07/09/what-are-they-staring-at_n_228963.html
Overlords, please do something with this classic pic, anything!
Oh &, Roland Burris is now chiseling on his mauseleoum “I’m A Quitter Just Like Sarah Palin”.
I am only posting her because there is no Chinese Moon War thread. &
Regulation of banks should be made the job of some group like the Nirouye Moqavemate Basij. They could do this with tear gas, baton charges and the occasional bit of live fire and I would be happy to watch. As happy as a monkey with a lifetime supply of free homemade icecream.
I think that french guy is a bad influence on our Hopey.Somebody needs to get word to Rahm, no more play dates with that Sarkosy kid, he’s a little perv.
[re=359396]dijetlo[/re]:
Now, now. At least Barry likes ladies (and has good taste I might add.) And he’s human. I’d stare at the booty, too.
What a surprise. The Wall Street Journal lecturing the proles on how if they were just more disciplined, like the good rich white people, they might live longer. Never mind the good rich white people are responsible for the miserable food choices available to the proles. Anyway, you’ll only pry my Icee® Blue Raspberry Freeze frozen treats out of my cold dead hands. And only then with your cold dead hands because I’ll have shot you before letting you get near me. So what if it turns my poop green? Since when is green poop a problem? First time was a little alarming until I researched the cause (food dye in the frozen treats.)
[re=359396]dijetlo[/re]: Eh, Sarkozy is small potatos compared to Berlusconi. If it weren’t for the Secret Service, that Italian fuckmonster would’ve lured Obama into his limo with the promise of candy by now.
[re=359393]WestEdEd[/re]: Begun this moon war has.
Bankruptcy drove home what the car-buying public has been telling GM for decades: The Fat Cat execs and the Union Slobs were all taking too large a piece of GM’s shrinking pie. Discarding the boardroom naysayers and the “What’s in it for me?” workers was a long overdue streamlining needed for GM’s survival.
Alas, all of the heartache could’ve been avoided with a little foresight and selflessness. But, as was noted by engineers, bright ideas were met with “That’s not the GM way!”
the trick with caloric restriction, if I remember correctly, has something to do with the way it slows the metabolism – basically, you deteriorate more slowly. With the serious adherents, it also significantly decreases your sex drive and makes you somewhat emotion-less.
in short, you turn into a robot, but not in the sexy, awesome way.
I’d much rather drink and eat dairy and bang and die younger, thank you.
GM will only have fully transitioned to a successful business model when GM stands not for General Motors but for Gravy n’ Mashed Potatoes.
[re=359391]lochnessmonster[/re]: Saying that banks are the solution to the budget problem is like saying that Paula Deen is the solution to the obesity epidemic.
Hey, what can Green do for you?
[re=359426]rereridiculous[/re]: Well, in a way, she is. She’ll eat all the food before you can get to it so you can’t get fat.
[re=359396]dijetlo[/re]: yes, He is looking away while those Eurotrash stare at the girl on the floor. I’m pretty sure Sark dropped something so she would have to bend down.
[re=359419]Lemming Caution[/re]: I think your skin dries out and your hair falls out a bit too. I think I’ll pass on an extra twenty years of THAT life. Burgers and margaritas for me!
GM might want to consider also changing its name. Say… perhaps… to Toyota.
You don’t have to become a dessicated humanoid to live longer. Try not eating factory-farmed, antibiotic- and BGH-laced, corn-fed beef. Avoid factory-farmed chickens steeped in ammonia-laden chickenshit their whole lives. I haven’t eaten critters in 20 years. It’s not a crusade. I don’t even think about it. I feel better just knowing I’m not pouring chickenshit, mutant e. coli and BGH down my gullet every day, not to mention helping to ruin the effectiveness of antibiotics due to their overuse. On the other hand I eat more high fructose corn syrup in the form of frozen confections (it’s fucking HOT in Texas) than your average morbidly obese 8-year-old. I can even buy Coca-Cola made with sugar if I want. I have no idea why I’m still writing. Save a gay hippie whale for jesus, then symbolically practice cannibalism each Sunday. It’s the US American way!
[re=359394]x111e7thst[/re]: Regulation of banks should be made the job of some group like the Nirouye Moqavemate Basij.
I’m thinking the Crazy 88′s. but the basij might work too.
How is Obama supposed to get anything done when he has to spend his valuable time meeting asshats like the Pope? Which reminds me: we need a Blingee of Ratzi using that terrifying image that HuffPo is using as part of their current headline.
GM isn’t the problem. Michgone is the problem. Michigone needs to be restructured. If GM wants to change its image, move the HQ to Windsor, ON.
calorie restriction – Now we know the secret of the Somali Pirates. If we want to win the long war, stop feeding the troops.
[re=359499]Anita Cocktail[/re]: Does the Pope wear a funny asshat?
Sure, they will fund starving monkeys, but why hasn’t the grant come through for my study of if you give a monkey a blow job once a day, both its quality and quantity of life go up? Come on, I just need enough money to buy a monkey!
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