Bill Kristol Thinks Highly Of Sarah Palin (But Sometimes He Thinks Lowly Of Sarah Palin), Very Highly (Or Lowly), And What Are These? (These Are Parentheses)

Rancid lying demon & TIME  New York Times Washington Post"lightning rod conservative" columnist Bill Kristol wrote a very funny column about Sarah Palin yesterday and now we are going to make fun of it.

You probably want to know what Bill Kristol, the most influential opinion-monger since Plato, but better, thinks about Sarah Palin's decision to quit her job running Alaska. He thinks it's a great idea (but he could be wrong) and the Republican "Establishment" is scared of her (maybe) because of her vast appeal to warty mouth-breathers and Neo-Nazis and people who don't like abortion (which is a significant chunk of people but notall peopleon Earth, when you do the math.)

Do you see what Bill Kristol has learned, after getting so many things wrong all the time, especially things that result in masses of humans being killed in wars? He has learned that a lousy writer/thinker's best friend is the Paranthetical Hedge, the use of which may lack a certain poetry... but also gives you a few square feet of plausible deniability when more humans end up dying in random countries!

Check out this hilarious first paragraph, which says nothing but still manages to be 100% composed of lies:

I like Sarah Palin (though I don't know her well). I respect her (though I'm aware of some of her limitations). I wish her well (though I'm not convinced she should be the 2012 Republican presidential nominee).

NIMBLE AS A CAT! Sometimes he's here, sometimes he's there, sometimeswho the hell knows. SHIFTY SHIFTY.

It's silly to claim Palin has no chance to win the nomination or the presidency. The fact is, despite a rough campaign in 2008, Palin has been (for what it's worth at this stage) a co-front-runner in polls of GOP primary voters for 2012, along with Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee.

Watch his feet,they never hit the ground.

The media establishment didn't protest much about the presidential candidacy of Barack Obama. He gave a good speech at the 2004 Democratic convention, was elected to the Senate that fall, and immediately started running for president. He didn't accomplish much in his four years in the Senate (nor could he have been expected to). But that didn't seem to hurt his standing. Isn't Palin about as well positioned for the 2012 GOP nomination as Obama was in 2005 for the 2008 Democratic one?

Yes but Barack Obama spent two years convincing people that he "knew things about policy" so that is a big difference, between him and the snowbilly grifter.

It's true that Bush didn't quit as governor and successfully ran for reelection. But why is it more admirable to run for national office while a sitting governor (or senator), spending a fair amount of time out of your state (or away from Congress), necessarily neglecting or delegating some of your duties -- than to turn the office over to your constitutional successor so your constituents have someone working full time on their behalf?

Or at the zoo (sick with the flu!) while eating pie (check out that sky!) and getting high (to eat the pie!) before we die (or away from Congress).

 Panicked Over Palin [WP]