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ON LANGUAGE

Is Our President TOO Diplomatic?: A Politico EXPOSE

Cryptofascist warblog The Politico has won the long weekend (and, by retroactive default, the Revolutionary War) with their crucial SCOOP on Obama’s weird obsession with pronouncing proper nouns—names of places he’s visiting, names of people he’s speaking to, that sort of thing—in the way in which they are actually intended to be pronounced. Quoth Politico’s Carol “Robert” E. Lee:  “In Obama’s view, pronouncing someone’s name or hometown correctly is a simple way of showing respect.” This is called Obamanomics, and it’s foreclosing America’s jobs.

This is because Barack Obama’s name (”Barack Obama”) has also been mispronounced on occasion! ACTUAL LEDE of this patriotic linguistic exegesis:

“Bill Clinton. George Bush. Jimmy Carter. They’re all pretty easy to pronounce.

But Barack Obama is not so simple.”

Phonetically, it is “Blagojevich.” But the Queen’s English was not invented by Jesus for use towards such recalcitrant vowelage!

We’re going to get into some heavy psychological shit for a minute, but we totally get it, you know? Obama’s wonky obsession with “correctness” and “facts” is mayhap tied to America’s habitual inability to properly intone the 6 letters—of which all 6 are vowels—of the Hawaiian alphabet. But that still begs the question: Why is Liz Becton blogging for Politico under the pseudonym “Robert E. Lee”?

[It's Pronounced "Drudge Bait"]


2:06 PM on Fri July 3 2009
By Juli Weiner
6122 Views

  1. A good day begins with recalcitrant vowelage.

  2. gjdodger says at 2:16 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Just don’t call him “Bob” Lee.

  3. spymoose says at 2:19 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Would “Big Boob” be okay?

  4. Vanity Smurf says at 2:20 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    recalcitrant vowelage

    It’s savory and delicious of you cook it long enough.

  5. dijetlo says at 2:23 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    It’s just so his Nigerian Voodoo God doesn’t turn the wrong people into living zombies…specificity is important when dealing with enraged super beings.

  6. magic titty says at 2:27 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    kill them.

  7. glamourdammerung says at 2:31 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Be sure to check out the comments for the delicious tears of the deadenders.

  8. I had an uncle with recalcitrant vowelage. He couldn’t eat cabbage or broccoli for the last 50 years of his life.

  9. iantenna says at 2:35 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    And Obama is not getting criticism in the way George W. Bush did for his pronunciation of “nuclear.”

    because really, what’s the difference between correct and incorrect?

  10. Canmon (the Inadequate) says at 2:37 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Does his teleprompter use Pashto characters or regular American ones?

  11. sevenrepeat says at 2:38 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    vowel movement.

  12. SmutBoffin says at 2:40 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    “At Tuesday’s nonprofit event, he nearly sounded out the last name of Dave Cieslewicz.”

    Barry, everyone around here just calls him ‘Mayor Dave’. Feel free to do likewise.

  13. rereridiculous says at 2:43 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Well shucks. Blagojevich had so much going for him for a presidential run after Obama, but it looks his good name will ruin his career.

  14. Autochthon says at 2:46 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    FEAR AND TREMBLE, FOOLISH MORTALS!

    Shorts has managed to snag an EXCLUSIVE interview with erstwhile “human,” JOE THE PLUMBER:

    http://www.shortsshortsshorts.com/?p=4334

  15. norbizness says at 2:47 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    “When will the God-fearing rich WASPy people of the world finally throw off the chains of their oppression and be blessed with one of their own in the Oval Office?”

  16. norbizness says at 2:50 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Why are links to other people’s blogs not instantaneously nullified and the perpetrators thrown into a Siberian labor camp?

  17. iantenna says at 2:51 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    a thoughtful consequence of him having Pakistani roommates in college that has its share of critics.

    first of all carol, this sentence bites the big one. does the “thoughtful consequence” have its share of critics, or the fact that barack (gasp!) had pakistani roommates in college? bee of all, my college roommates were armenian and, like barack did travel to pakistan before me, i went with them to glendale. am i on some turkish list now?

  18. Neilist says at 2:55 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    What’s so hard about pronouncing “Wog”?

    Or “Upper Absurdistan” or “Lower Revolutia,” or whatever it is said “wogs” reside?

    (Boy! Boy! Another gin and tonic over here! Chop, Chop! And this time put some bloody ice in it, you jaundiced looking heathen!

    Bloody natives. Never go get the rubber in on time.)

  19. Suds McKenzie says at 2:55 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    That’s a coincidence, I also feel I have “won the morning” by taking a good shit.

  20. Neilist says at 2:56 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    iantenna: Glendale?!? Porto’s Bakery on Brand Avenue. The BEST. Even though it is Cuban.

  21. Trixie says at 3:12 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    I kind of like Politico, but this is totally retarded. How fucking bizarre! A president who likes to speak properly!

  22. hobospacejunkie says at 3:24 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    True fact: the name that the natives call their home is the place’s endonym.

    The name that the rest of us call it is the place’s exonym.

    For instance, the German endonym for that city down south near Austin is München. München’s exonym is Munich.

    This concludes today’s lesson.

  23. Buffy and Hildegard says at 3:27 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Where is my Palin post? It has been almost five minutes since the news broke!

  24. HMS Nerd says at 3:33 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    @hobospacejunkie - and the name we give to a place or thing that represents something larger is a metonym (if I’m not mistaken).

    Well, this is the sort of coverage you get when the ‘evil’ MSM abandons the field to Nico Pitney and his imaginary Huffington Post for which he allegedly works - see: http://www.newsy.com/videos/679

    Kudos for Politico for paying attention to the words coming out of his mouth, but c’mon, Helen’s angry and the President’s hugging people and nobody’s paying attention except for crazy people on their webcams!

  25. Potater says at 3:41 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    SARAH PALIN IS FUCKING RESIGNING

    In other news, I miss Juli.

  26. Alpha O. Mega says at 3:42 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    I noticed when Barry spoke in Egypt that he pronounced “Koran” with a muslin accent.

  27. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 3:43 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    I can’t believe that Obama would so dis the Bush Administration Foreign Policy of disrespecting and bombing the darkies with this whole “At least say their name correctly” pussy stuff.

  28. Buffy and Hildegard says at 3:44 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    quitter. (barring there being something with the kids’ health or something) quitter. I think she just said “US Americans” in her speech.

  29. Vanity Smurf says at 3:47 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    oh god, Palin got whatever TMI disease Sanford came down with…. just give her the hook already!

  30. Vanity Smurf says at 3:48 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    What are those fowl creatures that are making horrible noises in the background of her speech? More Turkeys?

  31. LittlePig says at 3:48 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    [It's Pronounced "Drudge Bait"]

    Awesome, Ms Juli. And absolutely correct. “Will the Fedora be tipped our way? Will we get yolked from the Eggman? Tune to Politico for another edition of ‘Matt Drudge Rules Our World’”.

    Weenies.

  32. Suds McKenzie says at 3:50 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Potater: SARAH PALIN IS FUCKING RESIGNING, to become AK first Octomom??

  33. LittlePig says at 3:50 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    hobospacejunkie: Up in northern Arkansas is the little town of Mount Judea. But the endonym is “Mount Judy”.

  34. Buffy and Hildegard says at 3:51 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Vanity Smurf: Yes — what the hell?! There were definitely sheep. Where in godsname ARE they?

  35. Buffy and Hildegard says at 3:53 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Who IS this clown? Unless he is wearing her pumps, I am not interested in the speech from the new governor of the sort-of state.

  36. OReillysVibrator says at 3:53 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Suds McKenzie: Yeah speaking of drudge bait

  37. Vanity Smurf says at 3:54 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Palin signs a deal for a show on Fox in 3…2…1…. Also. Watch out Gretta, the Barracuda’s coming for you.

  38. finallyhappy says at 3:55 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Potater: Well, I spent 4 hours in the emergency room this morning but at least there is some good news today. Now if only Gov. Mark will admit to the boys or furries- and resign-this would be the best 4th of July weekend ever!

  39. Suds McKenzie says at 3:58 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    This had better not interrupt my wall to wall Michael Jackson coverage!

    will they drag Mathews out of the Irish Bar he’s been in all week?

    or Oberman from the first base line somewhere?

    or Madow from Provence Town?

  40. Atheist Nun says at 4:01 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Hello? Where is the “Mock Sarah Palin” thread with the MEGA-Drudge Siren?

  41. chascates says at 4:02 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Do resignations come in threes? First Palin, next Sanford? And then???

  42. Buffy and Hildegard says at 4:02 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Suds McKenzie: Yes — I needs me some Mathews spittle shed on this topic.

  43. Buzz Feedback says at 4:02 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Bitch is stealing MJ’s thunder.

  44. sezme says at 4:02 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Bill Clinton. George Bush. Jimmy Carter. They’re all pretty easy to pronounce.

    Barack Obama is very easy to pronounce (if you speak jive).

  45. Alpha O. Mega says at 4:03 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Suds McKenzie: CNN actually apologized for temporarily interrupting its Jacko coverage!

    My only question about Palin is how much did Eliot Spitzer pay her for sex?

  46. Vanity Smurf says at 4:04 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    So does this mean the sex tape won’t be released?

  47. Kingbee says at 4:05 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Palin is resigning? How does Obama pronounce “Mutha Fuck!”?

  48. Vanity Smurf says at 4:06 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Buffy and Hildegard: Tweety is too busy shedding his spittle across France right now. No way is she important enough to sober him up and find a satellite truck.

  49. BadKitty says at 4:07 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Hmmmm, I never would have figured Palin as a hiker but it looks like she’s hitting the trail?

  50. charlesdegoal says at 4:07 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    And SA-RA PAY-LIN is resigning. Also.

  51. yelac says at 5:47 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    barack obama is actually the easiest president name in history to produce phonetically. there is practically no human language speaker that should have difficulty producing those syllables except languages that lack an “r” sound

  52. Jukesgrrl says at 5:53 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    HMS Nerd: hobospacejunkie: I’m turning in my exam.

    Endonym = Heaven
    Exonym = Wasilla
    Metonym = Meth Capital of Alaska

    Did I pass?

  53. Unindicted Co-Conspirator says at 7:11 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    Where Barry Obama owns a house:
    Exonym = South Side
    Endonym = Sout Side

    Where his Chicago supporters with money live:
    Exonym = Nort Side
    Endonym = North Side

  54. Custersdeadhorse says at 7:55 pm, July 3rd, 2009

    It’s a promise he made to the Queen, “I’ll learn to speak the Queen’s English and give up my hoodspeak if you listen to all of my rapper music on that ipod.”

  55. AxmxZ says at 1:24 am, July 4th, 2009

    sezme: Barack Obama was never easy anything, according to some people we both know. Boy fended off advances from both sexes in the 80s like a freaking nun.

  56. Johnny Zhivago says at 9:46 am, July 4th, 2009

    Foreigners need to get it through their thick skulls that American presidents don’t need to know how to pronounce foreign place names, just how to bomb them.

  57. naveed says at 3:26 pm, July 4th, 2009

    Also.

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