She had to run, run, run, run, run, take a drag or two ....Oh, there is more to the Runner’s World interview with Sarah Palin than a simple Q&A about the regrets of falling down on the jogging trail and the Secret Service keeping her vile secret. (Which, like everything uttered by Sarah Palin, is also a lie.) There’s a whole photo spread, with seven online pictures of Sarah lookin’ all perky and athletic and just cold mocking John McCain for being a crippled old man who can’t exercise at all:

“I used to joke around with John McCain during the campaign about coming jogging with me. And once I asked him what his favorite exercise was, and he said, ‘I go wading.’ Wading. He lives on a creek in Arizona, so he goes wading. That cracked me up.”

Hah! Probably the Viet Cong broke his bones or whatever, when he was a POW. Loser can’t even run now!

Sarah Palin: I’m a Runner [Runner’s World Slideshow]

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  1. Wading is great exercise — it’s like bodysurfing — for people who can’t move.

    (and I’m not even going to think about the level of faux outrage the McCain-Palin campaign could have generated over that statement had someone on the left said it).

  2. “I used to joke around with John McCain during the campaign about coming jogging with me.”

    What an awesome sentence.

  3. Jesus. Here’s hoping her publicist/PR lady (Liz?) will angrily demand an apology to the troops, from Trig, for insulting women. And John McCain.


    In one photo she’s bending over coquettishly, giving Mr. Starburst a little taste of her runners bosom. Then there’s the one where she flaunts her pink running shoes and yogic flexibility. And the one where her hair is down and to the side and her legs are browner than her face. Oh and in the last picture she’s just cold leanin’ on the American Flag? Don’t they flog you for that in Texas?

    “Sarah Palin” is performance art. Think about it.

  5. [re=352786]Gopherit[/re]: On the other hand, if he handed crash-landed in that lake, he might never have discovered the joys of wading.

  6. [re=352792]Extemporanus[/re]: “Hadn’t”, not “handed”. (Sorry—I Trigged and hurt my typing hand earlier today.)

  7. [re=352798]Rumproast[/re]: Of all the bling, I think I like the butterfly that morphs into “USA” the best. I’m also troubled, but not surprised, that a flag-wrapped cross stamp exists.

  8. [re=352791]NoWireHangers[/re]: Interesting proposal. A car can never be art, because art must have no purpose apart from being art.

    Sarah Palin is art.

    Incidentally, what is up those pictures – they look like they’ve photoshopped the background in afterwards. In fact, that one with the stroller has definitely got weird shadows/lighting going on.

  9. Photo spread = starburst.

    John McCain’s worst act as presidential candidate was probably handing Palin a microphone, so we could no longer fantasize about America’s Hottest GILF.

  10. [re=352802]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: TY shorts. Normally, I’d spend most of my snark on the chat, but no one is there, so wonkette gets my best today.

  11. I used to make fun of, you know, John McCain for being old like. “Come run with me..whatsa matter? Cong got your shoes?” I used to say to him, laughing and laughing, sometimes while Todd snapped him with a towel. And McCain used to joke back at me, it was so funny, he used to say “I will do everything within my power to destroy you…I’ll lose this election if I have to…” Ha! So funny. He’d act all mad, all vibrating like the old do you know. I laughed and laughed.

  12. Cheesecake plus clichéd poses plus fuck me facial expressions plus using flag in disrespectful manner plus starburst boobie flash plus special needs child again used as political prop minus brain = one fucked up nasty skank.

    Also, her head doesn’t look like it belongs on that body. Something is very wrong with this woman.

  13. The She-Wolf of the SS may have a future in exercise videos as long as she can follow a teleprompter. I can’t understand why we don’t have any YouTube clips of her sportscasting days.

  14. These pictures take me back to my experimental early 20’s and thus I imagine shoving my face into her zesty spandex jogging pants, all inside out and steaming as she tosses them ever so casually into the hamper. Unfortunately I then imagine that she has left poor Trig in the hamper (again) and they land on his head in a moment of comedic whimsy. Damn it. I was mighty close…..

  15. She couldn’t for, you know, the sake of believability, tie her goddamn hair in a ponytail like all NORMAL female runners do when actually running? Instead she has to have her typical range of pageant queen hairdos on display in full vapid glory.

  16. Did anyone notice in the last picture that the electrical outlet only has one of those childproof plugs in it?

    What a horrible mother.

  17. What with all this confused fapping over Sarah Palin? Haven’t we gone through this before? I thought the consensus was that she’s only mildly attractive when compared to the morbidly obese and not even worthy of a 3-minute hatefuck?

    I recommend viewing at least 2 solid hours of professionally produced pornography, every day, until you all stop this “Palin’s a hawt GILF” tomfoolery.
    (Reminder: She’s completely repulsive.)

  18. [re=352803]Mahousu[/re]: What is that horrid vampire thing next to frowny Snowturd? I’m beginning to understand WALNUTS!’ trollop comment.

  19. Wow. I just this minute finished digesting the entire 1,000,000 word VF piece, flicked over to Wonkette for a little palate cleansing and saw this pic. I am going to the ladies room to expectorate 100MB of Sarah Palin. I am done with her.

  20. (1) i’m pretty sure a couple of those “stretches” were yoga-like. why does Sarah love socialism Hindus, and the communist Indians?
    (2) those pants (in slides 1-5) make women 10% hotter than they actually are. if you look closely @ no. 2 a/k/a “Lakeside Wingnut With Nonprescription Glasses,” you can see Father Time (with the help of 17 litters of snowbillies) working magic.
    (3) all that semi-high end gear and not a stitch of it made in U.S. ‘Merica. I used to wear and sing the praises of Asics (specifically the DS Trainer) until I realized they were made by the Trig Palins of the world and my decisions kept some guy in Boston from being able to catch a job with New Balance and send his kids to a half-decent school. Then again, manufacturing jobs with a living wage and good public schools are communist while Vietnamese sweatshops are “the free markets working.” so i might be wrong.

  21. I’d just like the record to reflect that Sarah Homina-Homina is not wearing a wedding ring in any of these photos.

    Maybe people take those off when they run. I have no idea, which may explain my ankle-brushing panniculus. Also.

  22. [re=352798]Rumproast[/re]: Nice job, Patriot!

    Also, I’m printing out the original pics and making paper cut-out dolls for the special needs kids at the school next door.

  23. Why are the hawt ones always dumb/crazy/opposed to birth control? Governor, no one ever got pregnant from anal sex.

    Also: Dewlap.

  24. I dislike runners, though I used to be one. I’m tired of good walks being ruined by freak health-fascists who think every trail is for their compulsive S&M aerobic training. I especially hate the sense of superiority I suspect they have for their perverse exercise fetish, which is a vice that should be outlawed.


  26. It’s all about her isn’t it?
    She’d shoot a PUMA from a helicopter, skin it, and make skin-blanket for her retarded offspring.

  27. That’s right, stupid–stare into the camera and grin in every pic. Looks like a senior photo spread for Wasilla High. “Strangers with Candy” come to life.

  28. [re=352813]Biden Time[/re]: Yes but apparently she hates America and our troops with that flag folded over that chair like some type of shit covered rag.
    However, I’ll put my patriotism aside (just this once) and use those piggy tails to ride her salmon pouch like Jesus on a snowmachine.

  29. Breaking! In the latest issue of “Cummer’s World” Sarah gives her advice on how to deal with unwanted spunk, when to just go ahead and swallow and the true meaning of the term “The Wassilla Tortilla”.

  30. [re=352855]Extemporanus[/re]: PolarTrig is great– now can you shrink the Trighead a little and put it in the lake? He has a Head Fit For Any Occasion. haha

  31. i call BS on 98% of those quotes. If she was an actual runner, who cherished her hour run, I would like think she’d have a greater ability of introspection.

  32. [re=352864]loquaciousmusic[/re]: I challenge you to incorporate a different one of the Seven Deadly Sins each round, and then report back on which is the most “deadly.”

  33. I’m sorry my liberal comrades. But seeing that MILF bending and posing makes me want to stick my meat into her – hard!

    My only questions are – does she suck dick and does she let the teeth get in the way?

  34. Exercise DVDs? Wait, where is the picture of her manning the Wasila anti-aircraft weapon pointed toward Russia? Sorry, wrong exercise DVD pimp.

  35. This is a fairly transparent appeal for millions and millions of Photoshops. That is the reason for all of the hairdos and facial angles and also the unnatural studio-lighting applied to outdoor “candid” shots.

    She will then rail against the pornographic ones just as people are starting to ignore her in favor of the elaborate, shrapnel-heavy demise of an 80’s celebrity.

    So, get to work people, we all have a job to do.

  36. [re=352866]Extemporanus[/re]: I’m writing from my masturbation session to report that, after seven full-on orgasmic interludes with those pictures, I am now prepared to vote Republican, state beyond a shadow of a doubt that Sarah Palin is the only person who can truly lead America, and drive myself to the hospital because my penis has come off in my hand.

    In short, I have become Bill Kristol.

  37. Wading can be dangerous, we waded into Vietnam, remember that. Now Iraq, that was more of a cannon ball into the shallow end.

    BTW, she looks good, like a Governor should.

    While we are on the subject, where is Wonkette’s live coverage of Anthrocon 2009 Pittsburgh Pa, happening right now! I figured Wonkette would be wall to wall Furries by now.

  38. Can she please stop with the sexy librarian look and take off those stupid glasses?

    If she really wants to appeal to republicans she should start dressing like a little boy.

  39. “I feel so crappy if I go more than a few days without running. I have to run. No matter how rotten I feel before or during a run, it’s always worth it to me afterwards. Sweat is my sanity.”


  40. I checked out the website of the photographer, Brian Adams. He’s a good one-shot portrait photographer, but the job called for someone who knows how to put together a photo story. He probably had Todd looking right over his shoulder giving advice when he was shooting, and that couldn’t have helped, either. He used a couple of the Palin shots in his online portfolio–what commercial photographer wouldn’t, given her notoriety? But he knows they’re not very good–hokey posing, overlit. The other stuff on his site is very good.

  41. Something is up with these pictures. On slide 6, why are her legs 10 times as tan as her hands and face? I bet she is wearing tan pantyhose just for the photo shoot.

  42. Oh, and one more thing: The picture of the kid underscores the joke about the only difference between SP’s mouth and her vagina is that only one retarded thing has come out of the latter.

  43. [re=352885]AutomaticPilot[/re]: Bet you’re right, support hose. After whelping all those young ‘uns, she’s bound to have some varicose veins.

  44. And always the elegant command of the English language; ‘When I run, I’m totally incognito because I’m not wearing the trough full of makeup.”

  45. [re=352876]Mr Blifil[/re]: I’ve got a doozy in the works. Two words: beaver shot.

    Just have to wait for the wife to go to bed. Stay tuned…

  46. David Letterman: Can’t make fun of Sarah Palin for any reason.

    Sarah Palin: Can make fun of 72-year-old, disabled cancer survivors for their inability to engage in strenuous exercise.

  47. Leaning against the American flag, strategically tossed on a bar stool behind her while holding a blackberry and wearing hotpants?? WTF? Oh yeah, nice cameltoe in photo 1. (Seems I don’t have anything nice to say….).

  48. It would of course be a horrible aweful shame if Walnuts accidentally slipped, during said jogging trip, into the creek (or vietcong rat hole).

    Walnut knew might might have been in store. You don’t survive FIVE AND A HALF YEARS without picking up on when someone wants to off you.

  49. [re=352874]loquaciousmusic[/re]: So, based on how your onanistic escaped ended, am I to conclude that “Wrath” is the deadliest of the Seven Deadly Sins to commit whilst masturbating?

    Also, that you are now prepared to vote Republican is less-than-telling. Any masturbatory act performed by a registered Republican is by definition one that incorporates at least one of the Seven Deadly Sins in its commission.

  50. Ok, OK time out. She looks fine? She looks like a FREAK head stuck on a so-so mid 40’s body and the bile that comes out of that mouth calls off all bets. Poor SP, pathological liar.

  51. Entertaining a late night audience with promiscuous jokes about promiscuous teenage girls? Criminal.

    Ridiculing war veterans to whom retards owe the freedom to run for VPOTUS? Priceless.

    There, you have it. The definition of an irremediably stupid dingleberry.

  52. By 2012, Palin will be pushing 50 (and probably one or two “special need” babies later). She’ll be too weathered and saggy even for a FoxNews gig.

  53. [re=352896]BlueStateLibtard[/re]: Tis just “a moose’s butt plopping on over.”

    “It doesn’t matter your background, your demographics, your race, your political affiliation, it’s such a uniting, healthy, fun, awesome activity” reading these quotes.

  54. We Talibangelicals look at things a little differently. This picture is what she wanted out there. She’s a Karl Rove Republican, she needs anti-abortion numbers if she’s going to win the primary and make a run on Hopey. Sister Sara is not as dumb as you may think.
    God wants Sara to be President, he told her so (though damn if I can figure out why). Think about it, every other likely candidate with national stature but Mittens has fallen victim to Nigerian penis voodoo. They are literally being drug to their destruction by their man parts. I look at Brother Mark Sanford and wonder, can’t somebody help that poor bastard? The only one grinnin’ in the entire Senate Caucus is Jon Ensign. They look like the boiler crew from the Titanic. How many more must commit political sepeku with some jaw dropping cockscepade for the amusement of our Nigerian Overlord?
    The general feeling in the conservative bunker is the devil walks among us.Fortunately for team Palin, their rockin a vag, immune to penis voodoo and Mitten got them drawers on so it’s on for 2012

  55. Hopey, ball’s in your court. We wonketters of the distaff side demand pics, now. Shirt off. Bend over your desk to fetch some folder you want to read in bed. Next: Drape yourself across your king mattress in less-than-presidential deshabille as you ponder matters of state. Next day: gym! [Remainder of script available upon request.]

    Two can play this game, missy!

  56. I personally think My God and Savior should wear more Fedoras, look a bit discerning yet focused (evil eye), and grill some arugula (1337) to enhance a dish whenever necessary.

  57. [re=352955]dijetlo[/re]: Mittens will be “inevitable,” then Palin will win the Iowa primary. Then the Republican superdelegates will be all “holy crap this person will never be able to win” and throw all their support behind Mitt, causing the primary to stretch out an agonizing 6 months culminating in Youtubes of Palin supports calling Mitt an “inadequate Mormon male.”

    Wait Republicans don’t have superdelegates? Awwwww.

  58. That baby looks retarded and undersized and with some kind of fetal alcohol syndrome. Sarah should get her tubes tied and stop with the old lady tarty posing and sexy talking before she makes any more of these creatures. God is telling you to stop having sex without birth control Sarah until he blesses you with the change.
    Is that mean enough?

  59. A video juxtaposing images of Obama with King Kong was made and posted on You Tube to celebrate the 4th of July and raise funds on behalf of SarahPAC, but was considered so racist it was removed. Screenshots of the original video were taken by some worthy gents and ladies, which you may find here:

    stop by and give these guys some love for being on the spot.

    The woman who created the lovely racist paean for Sarah Palin is named, I kid you not, Laura Van Wormer, and is an author, and a loud and proud SArah supporter and apparently a casual racist…here is her webpage

    I am not exactly “outraged” but this is what, the second, third time now someone has gone to a mass audience with images comparing Obama to a monkey. This is exactly the technique that was used by Hitler – cartoon images of Jews-As-Monkeys – to degrade them on a mass level and make them targets of racism, robbery, abuse and of course finally murder.

    Any thoughts?

  60. [re=352970]nailinpalinnow[/re]: Any thoughts? Yeah. That wasn’t very funny. Kind of a buzzkiller, actually. But yeah, agreed. But do we deal with it by ignoring it or by publicizing & confronting it? I prefer starving it of attention and (hopefully?) letting it die. Attention is the lifeblood of the fringe (fringe relative to the rest of us, not fringe republican, they are middle of the road in their party.)

  61. sorry ’bout the buzzkill folks my bad.

    starving is good – the racist part of the video which was supposed to raise funds for SarahPAC all weekend was taken down in response to commenters, so all that waas left was a mishmash of stupid – perfect for fundsqueezing dribs and drabs of money out of Palinbots.

  62. Picture this:

    Middle aged, middle American Repub sitting on his toilet, his distended belly full of steak and corn, obscenely spilling over to rest on this thighs, his back hair plastered down with sweat, a look of intense concentration on his face as he furiously pounds his half-erect penis while holding the newest issue of Runner’s World open with his feet.

  63. [re=352955]dijetlo[/re]: “God wants Sara to be President, he told her so (though damn if I can figure out why).”
    He wishes to bring about The Last Days.

  64. Well, her pics don’t look that bad.
    (SMACK!, Sorry, dear)
    However, she looks better with her hair up.
    See pic#6 as an example of why she shouldn’t have her hair down.

    And read her commentary;
    “In Anchorage on the coastal trail there have been many times where I’ve had to stop right in my tracks and turn around because there’s been either a moose standing there staring at me or a moose’s butt plopping on over into the trail. I have to turn around and leave or I’m going to get clobbered.”

    Moose’s butt, indeed!

  65. I’m sick to death of that up-do with every hair carefully placed to look slightly disheveled. No wonder her daughters are messed up…they are competing with Mom for boyfriends!

  66. [re=353180]S.Luggo[/re]: Nah, if he wanted the end of days, he’d just do it, being the all powerful creator of the Universe means you don’t have to wait on the retards.
    He’s fucking with us, it’s like when your grandpa used to tell you “pull my finger”, the Almighty has a sense of humor but it’s kind of vicious (sorry Lord, but you need to lighten up).

  67. “When I run, I’m totally incognito because I’m not wearing the trough full of makeup. I can go running through a mob of tourists and they don’t recognize me.”

    i think that statement about sums her up perfectly.

  68. Oil
    The FED

  69. How about the Sarah Palin sex video? Maybe doing it with Mark Sanford? Maybe it can be the next non-torture at Gtmo or wherever.

    Zhu Bajie

  70. [re=352955]dijetlo[/re]: “God wants Sara to be President, he told her so (though damn if I can figure out why).”

    Because He’s a practical joker, that’s why. “The Almighty laughs them to scorn.”

    Zhu Bajie

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