BUT THERE'S ONLY ONE MARK SANFORD  6:38 pm June 23, 2009

Did You Know Other Governors, In History, Have Also Done Weird Things?

by Ken Layne

History's glorious oddball!An important new Associated Press topical article notes that exactly five other governors in American history have done something weird, while in office. So nature-boy mountain lamer Mark Sanford is not alone! Come out of the closet, Mark, and come back to America.

According to the AP, here are the historic oddballs:

  • Jimmie Davis, governor of Louisiana during the making of O Brother Where Art Thou: Was a hillbilly singer who did that “You Are My Sunshine” song, also hated the darkies.
  • Lester Maddox, governor of Georgia, maybe still today: Rode a bicycle backwards, hated the Negro.
  • Jesse Ventura, governor of Mexico: Grumbly ex-wrestler, hated Norm Coleman.
  • Rod Blagojevich, governor of ethics: Crazy hair, hated being governor.
  • Eliot Spitzer, governor of prostitution and Wall Street: Weird little jackass, hates his wife and children.

And there you have it, according to the AP: America’s wackiest governors in History!

A look at odd behavior by US governors [Associated Press]

 

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{ 84 comments }

Adolf Bachmann June 23, 2009 at 6:41 pm

Sanford, Governor of Real Amurrica: Rejected stimulus funds, injected stimulants in buns!

DagNabbit June 23, 2009 at 6:42 pm

Sarah Palin: Clueless Cunt w/ Glasses, Displays Dysfunctional Bio-Organisms Proudly

WEIRD!

Lord Growing June 23, 2009 at 6:43 pm

What, no “Pass the Biscuits” Pappy? Sheesh.

oldguy June 23, 2009 at 6:44 pm

Rick Perry, Governor of Texas. The end.

shortsshortsshorts June 23, 2009 at 6:45 pm

HE ISN’T ON THE TRAIL. Thank you shortsx3 tips box. Will not blog whore, but THE URGE IS PRESENT.

GDuvall June 23, 2009 at 6:45 pm

Maddox was known for quaint sayings, such as calling constituents “little people,” and outrageous gestures such as riding a bicycle backward.

Well, that and threatening to club black people over the head with an ax handle. Really, AP?

Gopherit June 23, 2009 at 6:47 pm

But….but….he may actually have left the country!

http://www.wyff4.com/news/19837234/detail.html

I’m going with Thailand and little boys.

janejax June 23, 2009 at 6:47 pm

Arnold Schwarzenegger : They call him the Governator. . . uses his movie catch phrases in press conferences and calls liberals “girly -men” No snark required.

Joshua Norton June 23, 2009 at 6:48 pm

Are you kidding? EVERYTHING Schwarzenegger has done in office has been weird.

rambone June 23, 2009 at 6:49 pm

Michael Steele: Governor of my black ass. Once pissed of Rush Limbaugh and had to atone by baking him a cake made of Oxycontin and hatred for coloreds/gheys.

slappypaddy June 23, 2009 at 6:50 pm

Benjamin Hur, Governor of New Mexico Territory, raced chariots through bonfires

Min June 23, 2009 at 6:50 pm

They missed Ray Blanton, Governor of Tennessee, 1974-79. Lamar Alexander was sworn into office three days early to stop Ray from pardoning felons as fast as he could pocket the bribes.

DagNabbit June 23, 2009 at 6:52 pm

[re=345784]Gopherit[/re]: Oh no no no! He was just spulunking into Sum Dum Chink’s cave.

How rude of you to suggest otherwise.

19kevin8 June 23, 2009 at 6:53 pm

No Mike Dukakis?

19kevin8 June 23, 2009 at 6:54 pm

Or William Weld, diving into the nasty-as-fuck Charles River?

Extemporanus June 23, 2009 at 7:06 pm

A look at odd behavior by US Governors
posted 2 hrs ago

blahblahblahblah…

Compiled by Monika Mathur at the AP’s News Department of Redundancy Department

boatapple June 23, 2009 at 7:08 pm

None of these losers can hold a candle to William Donald Schaefer, and his ladyfriend Hilda Mae Snoops, they of the adjoining trailers in Ocean City, and adjoining Balto row houses the rest of the year.

There was that time he told some state senator that his Eastern Shore constituency was a “shithouse.” And let’s see, he spent a large part of one term using the MVA to stalk and terrorize some woman who gave him the finger on the Bay Bridge.

I know there’s more.

Moleman v2.5 June 23, 2009 at 7:08 pm

Gov. Sanford will resign to spend less time with his family … maybe more time with the dead girl or live boy he’s got in that shack along the Trail?

boatapple June 23, 2009 at 7:13 pm

[re=345796]19kevin8[/re]: My Schaefer dove into the dolphin tank at the aquarium in Baltimore, on teevee. He might’ve been mayor at the time, so maybe it doesn’t count.

dijetlo June 23, 2009 at 7:14 pm

[re=345809]boatapple[/re]:Willie Don never had a job that paid more than $30,000 a year before becoming governor and was worth almost $15,000,000 when he took office…told people he was “careful with his money”.

boatapple June 23, 2009 at 7:16 pm

[re=345809]boatapple[/re]: Oh and in 1992, though he’s a Democrat he endorsed Poppy Bush for president. Because he really hated Bill Clinton or something.

Yes, well, it seemed nutty at the time.

boatapple June 23, 2009 at 7:18 pm

[re=345818]dijetlo[/re]: Hahaha yeah that sounds like something he’d say.

Holding Out for a Hero June 23, 2009 at 7:32 pm

[re=345784]Gopherit[/re]: The Dominican Republic is closer.

AngryBlakGuy June 23, 2009 at 7:44 pm

…you cant forget my governor!

Charlie Crist: Governor/Patron st. of spray on tan and interior decorating.

P.S.
And by “Interior Decorating” I mean, greased up, man on man, Roman Greco, studded dildo sex!

Otter bored. June 23, 2009 at 7:48 pm

Charles Grassley, while governor of Iowa, was a NAIL.

liquiddaddy June 23, 2009 at 7:49 pm

Recent information confirmed that his state vehicle was traced to a Georgia airport where he was spotted by a federal agent.

Wet Work June 23, 2009 at 7:50 pm

“On Tuesday, sources told News 4′s Nigel Robertson that a state vehicle is missing and was tracked down, not to the Appalachian Trail, but to the Hartsfield-Jackson Airport in Atlanta.”

Told ya! Airport bathroom FTW!!!

Mahousu June 23, 2009 at 7:54 pm

Poor Monika Mathur. I feel her pain. I had one of those “give five examples of” questions on my History 305 midterm, and just like her, I could only come up with two – or really one and a half – of them.

Fortunately, the prof graded on a curve, so I ended up with a C+ on the exam, and managed to lift it to a B for the course. So there’s hope.

Randeep Mann June 23, 2009 at 7:55 pm

Rev. Mike Huckabee – Had liposuction. Killed the cosmetic surgeon. Wrote fictional novel about heroic weight loss.

maven June 23, 2009 at 8:00 pm

I thought this was a great response at Huffpost:

Wait — I figured out where he went! http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/faith/article4893735.ece

Inappropriate
Jun. 23, 2009 7:09pm EDT | from concernedcitizn

DP June 23, 2009 at 8:01 pm

All these governors acting so badly and no one remember New Jersey’s own Jim McGreevey? He just put his non-citizen boy toy on the payroll is all, as a anti-terrorism adviser, no less. Now he’s studying to be a priest, but not a Catholic priest, so the kids are safe…

Mahousu June 23, 2009 at 8:16 pm

I did an idle Google search for Sanford’s wife, and came up with the following gem: http://www.daylife.com/photo/03GX9sc0BI3cC

This is from the last days of his gubernatorial campaign in 2006, when he also disappeared for a while, so his wife did news conferences in his place. The excuse then was even more original: “Mark Sanford burned his eyes under the bright stage lights at a groundbreaking ceremony and was sidelined on the very last day of the campaign, his wife said Monday.”

Youstonedorjuststupid? June 23, 2009 at 8:17 pm

Ruh Roh Rhaggy, there’s info coming out his car is at the airport in Atlanta and he was spotted getting on a play by a “federal agent”.

Youstonedorjuststupid? June 23, 2009 at 8:19 pm

yeesh, plane, stupid hash…

Dr.GonzoMD June 23, 2009 at 8:22 pm

[re=345796]19kevin8[/re]: I’ve doggie-paddled those sweet waters and I’m a better man for it. Oh, wait this is Wonkette, not the porntube comments section. Never mind.

smellyal8r June 23, 2009 at 8:23 pm

Sanford is going to bitch and whine that he can’t do what he wants when he wants without the MSM getting all worked up about where he went, who he was with, etc. Just another reason they oughta tear up the line between the Carolinas (and between the Dakotas) and start solving many of our peskiest problems.

Tra June 23, 2009 at 8:29 pm

[re=345821]boatapple[/re]:
[re=345818]dijetlo[/re]:

Then there was his opposition to English as a Second Language classes because the Koreans, always tossing missiles at us, are not really our friends.

Fortunately, we Marylanders have redeemed ourselves by gracing the world with Michael Steele.

Terry June 23, 2009 at 8:30 pm

“Jimmie Davis, governor of Louisiana during the making of O Brother Where Art Thou: Was a hillbilly singer who did that “You Are My Sunshine” song, also hated the darkies. ”

Not during the making of the recent movie. Old Jimmie was governor of La twice, once in the late 40′s and once in the early 60′s.

BlueStateLibtard June 23, 2009 at 8:31 pm

George W. Bush, governor of Texas…became president, started an illegal war, legalized torture and ruined the economy for decades!

Tommmcatt June 23, 2009 at 8:31 pm

[re=345780]shortsshortsshorts[/re]:

It’s a brave new world, isn’t it Shorts?

Terry June 23, 2009 at 8:34 pm

[re=345809]boatapple[/re]:

William Donald Shaeffer swam in the outdoor animal pond at the Baltimore Aquarium when he was mayor of that city. He bet that the Aquarium would be completed on time, and when it wasn’t settled his bet with a swim with the seals.

Oh, and he also used to wear costumes to the State House while governor.

Edwin Edwards, of Louisiana, took some State funds and gambled them away in a Las Vegas casino. He was voted out of office but regained the governorship with the GOP ran David Duke, admitted Klan member, against him.

stew June 23, 2009 at 8:55 pm

I understand he is now having ticks surgically removed from his scrotum after five days of naked nature hiking stuff.

President Beeblebrox June 23, 2009 at 9:07 pm

Ruth Ann Minner, Delaware’s former lady governor, has a GED and owns a tow-truck bidness. [re=345809]boatapple[/re]: Then again, practically ALL of Delaware is the same as the Eastern Shore of Maryland, so – also.

President Beeblebrox June 23, 2009 at 9:12 pm

[re=345784]Gopherit[/re]: As usual, the comments on that story are hilarious, to wit: Sanford’s disappearance is the fault of the Democrats, Obama has duped black people, and Sanford’s whereabouts should have been known because a sekrit nuke might have been spirited into Charleston or something like that… o wait, that was a cheesy TV movie that ran on NBC in the 80s.

But the many Larry Craig/Mark Sanford jokes make up for all the idiocy.

stew June 23, 2009 at 9:13 pm

“I am being a mom today. I have not heard from my husband. I am taking care of my children.”

Ewww, note the “my” usage. Sounds like she’s already moved on…

Manos: Hands of Fate June 23, 2009 at 9:16 pm

Jerry Brown dated Linda Ronstadt and lived out of his Plymouth Satellite while in Sacramento. And Cali is about to get another couple terms of the dude.

WhatTheHeck June 23, 2009 at 9:18 pm

Ah, but not many gov’nors can handle exorcisms, can they, Bobby?

John Thune June 23, 2009 at 9:43 pm

There’s also South Dakota’s own Bill Janklow–ran down a motorcyclist and alternatively claimed he had to swerve to miss a “phantom car” or was having a seizure or something.

windupbird June 23, 2009 at 9:44 pm

From a different article: “The state lawmaker noted the governor’s past quirky behavior — particularly a 2004 stunt in which Sanford brought live pigs to the House to drive home a point about “pork-barrel” spending. Outraged lawmakers squealed at the time that the governor was “insulting” his state with the stunt. Worst of all, the pigs apparently were not housebroken.

“They defecated all over the carpet and lobby,” Knotts recalled. “Crapped all over everybody, news reporters, everybody. … It’s things like that.”

Uh, what does “things like that” mean?

WadISay June 23, 2009 at 10:00 pm

But now he know what the Disappeared of Chile feel like.

Zorg June 23, 2009 at 10:03 pm

Jimmie Davis was the governor of Louisiana during the making of “O Brother, Where Art Thou?” Really? Davis’ last term ended in 1964 and the movie was released in 2000, the year he died. Did the Coen brothers spend that much time in post-production? Uhm, Davis came after the previous governor, Earl Long, was put into a mental hospital in Galveston, Texas by his wife after she got tired of him putting the wood to New Orleans stripper Blaze Starr. Much more colorful than Davis, who was mostly a mean, racist hillbilly — with a talent for yodeling. Released from the mental hospital, Long was asked by a reporter if he was really cured of his madness. Long replied along the lines of “I got this here piece of paper that says I ain’t crazy. Where’s yours?” And Texas had Ma and Pa Ferguson in sequence for governors. Ma explained that there was no need for bilingual education for Mexican-American children in the Rio Grande Valley counties because “Jesus spoke English in the Bible and if it was good enough for Him, it’s good enough for the children.” God, and I could so go on…

Zorg June 23, 2009 at 10:07 pm

So, the AP is now staffed by teenagers with a casual knowledge of how to use Google.

ifthethunderdontgetya" June 23, 2009 at 10:16 pm

[re=345962]Zorg[/re]: It’s a big improvement.
~

Barrelhse June 23, 2009 at 10:29 pm

[re=345784]Gopherit[/re]: Maybe he went to Iran in order to keep the current regime in power so we can blow ‘em all to kingdom come. Kind of a secret mission of the GOP.

Ohio Wonkette Fan June 23, 2009 at 10:40 pm

Obviously he was at the gay pride festival in Columbus for the weekend; but doesn’t know how to break it to the folks back home.

Bearbloke June 23, 2009 at 10:43 pm

MYSTERY SOLVED! It’s clear that Sanford’s a Bear-chaser AND a home-canner, so he found his new friends in Canon, GA – just outside Hotlanta….

chascates June 23, 2009 at 10:51 pm

It’s like with football coaches. You need someone smart enough to do the job and stupid enough to think it matters.

A Better American Than YOU June 23, 2009 at 11:18 pm

[re=345956]Zorg[/re]: Uh, Kenny Boy was making a little joke about Jimmie Davis. The AP article didn’t really say it. That Ken Layne is such a card!

Zorg June 23, 2009 at 11:29 pm

[re=345986]A Better American Than YOU[/re]: Thank you for the clarification. Because of you, I’m a slightly better American today.

Ken Layne June 24, 2009 at 1:18 am

[re=345909]Terry[/re]: Wow gosh ya think?

Ken Layne June 24, 2009 at 1:19 am

[re=345956]Zorg[/re]: Gee whiz, really?

Sarah T June 24, 2009 at 1:22 am

I keep thinking of that Robert Frost poem, ‘Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening’ :

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village, though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch Gov. Sanford getting teabagged by a park ranger in the snow.

My little horse must think it queer
To see a governor with leather-clad rear.

I forget the rest of it, though…

windupbird June 24, 2009 at 1:24 am

I’m sorry, I can’t top any of the weird governor stories. We did have Mittens a couple of years ago, that must count for something.

Adolf Bachmann June 24, 2009 at 1:29 am

Schwarzenegger statutorily raped girls on the set of Terminator 3 barely a year before he was erected Governor of FAILifornia. Oops!

LoweredPeninsual June 24, 2009 at 1:41 am

My State Governor:

Jennifer Granholm – Like Governor Schwarzenegger, appeared as a contestant on “The Dating Game”. She recently had to have emergency surgery for an obstructed bowel that was a result of a 1993 car accident in DC that nearly killed her. Oh, and she’s Commie Canadian by birth, but raised in the Bay Area. Her most important doing? She is America’s hottest governor. Yeah, I said it. Stick it, Wonkette, and your Sarah Palin obessession!

gurukalehuru June 24, 2009 at 2:18 am

[re=345871]Otter bored.[/re]: Charles Grassley, thank god, was never Governor of Iowa. Harold Hughes (who has been forgotten by history because even people from Iowa got him confused with Howard Hughes and people outside of Iowa, well, fuck, it’s Iowa, now, isn’t it), who was governor like forever in the 60s and 70s, was maybe the first major politicians ever to admit to having smoked pot.

Lionel Hutz Esq. June 24, 2009 at 2:49 am

I never thought of Jesse Ventura as being so normal.

That being said, how could you forget Mitt “Mittens” Romney, once dragged a dog across country from the back of his car, had his father’s grounds keeper shoot a squirrel, and hated darkies until 1979.

Or Washington’s own Dixie Lee Ray. When her first saw her, I asked my Mom “Who is that strange looking fat man.” One of the worse Governor’s ever, while supposedly a Democrat, went on to write books about how Nuclear power was just spiffy and worth a little glow from your vegitables. So grumpy, they said she shot a man just for snoring. As far as I know, didn’t hate Negros, but did name a litter of pigs after reporters.

[re=345941]WhatTheHeck[/re]: And think, how many people have been so destined for greatness that his Satanic Majesty has personally sent demons to stalk him?

hamletta June 24, 2009 at 3:05 am

[re=345792]Min[/re]: +1 for Ray Blanton! But I think the story was concentrating on behavior that was “odd,” as opposed to “blatantly criminal.”

I didn’t live here then, but I heard he used to go on TV and say, “Yeah, I let out a bunch of criminals today. And I’m gonna let out more tomorrow!”

He was also inadvertently responsible for Fred Thompson’s “acting” career, so all lovers of the dramatic arts should go piss on his grave right now.

Leopolt June 24, 2009 at 4:11 am

Damn, you boys need to get ya’ll’s Loozyana history straight. That was a joke, son, a joke about being governor during Oh Brother Where Art Thou, even I got that. Jimmie Davis a sweetheart, mostly harmless as governor his first term, and not nearly as bloodthirsty a segregationist as the nitwits in the Lege he had to deal with during his second term.

Now Earl Long, there was a fullon bull moose psycho, sort of guy only Hunter S. Thompson could relate to. He ended up in Mandeville at the state hospital for the severely upset, after taking a wizz at the head table during a banquet in Arizona. However, since he had appointed the head of the state hospitals, he was able to get a release toot sweet. It is true that he said ” I am as sane as anybody, and I have the paper to prove it!”

Then there’s Fast Eddy Edwards, who said “The only way I will lose this election is if I get caught in bed with a live boy or a dead girl” – now serving time in the Federal pen. Or Murphy J. Foster III, who rode around on a motorcycle and attended law school during his second term. Or Richard Leche, who said, “When I took the oath of office I didn’t take any vow of poverty” and was convicted of mail fraud after he failed to escape to Canada. Or…

Roslin June 24, 2009 at 5:15 am

Yeah, Louisiana’s only rival in the Crazy-ass Governor Sweepstakes might be Texas. We had Bill Clements, who, when asked what Texans should do about an incipient oil spill, said “Pray fo a hurricane.” And Preston Smith (“Poor Old Preston”), who was once greeted by demonstrators demanding that he “Free Otis”, referring to a black man unfairly convicted and on death row. He wondered why the protesters kept demanding frijoles.

Come here a minute June 24, 2009 at 7:12 am

The jokers at Woot! are mocking the gov’s disappearance to sell some electronic gizmo, a Slingbox.

Believe me, being the governor of a small Southern state is no picnic at Fort Sumter. So every once in a while, I just need to drop out and get my head together, dig?

So whenever I disappear without explanation for days a time, I make sure I bring my WiFi-equipped laptop and hike to a hotspot by the time my stories come on.

That’s some fine retail snark.

ph7 June 24, 2009 at 8:02 am

The Jew laughed at Lester Maddox
And the audience laughed at Lester Maddox too

Saxby Coburg June 24, 2009 at 8:12 am

[re=346046]Leopolt[/re]: Best quote from Earl Long: “The people of Louisiana will get good government someday and they won’t like it.”

Saxby Coburg June 24, 2009 at 8:26 am

More on Jimmy Davis: He built the original “bridge to nowhere,” a span across the Mississippi which terminated in a swamp owned by a campaign contributor. Named it the “Sunshine Bridge” after his horse, of “You are My Sunshine” fame, which he once he rode into the governor’s office. Did a David Vitter release on the oriental rug (Sunshine, that is, not Jimmy). Poor little humorless Piyush. All he can conjure up is an exorcism and chemical castration. No match for Earl “Red Hot Pappa” Long, Jimmy, Fast Eddie and the original larger-than-life guv, Huey Long.

Unlearned Hand June 24, 2009 at 8:33 am

Well, they found the crazy bastard: http://www.thestate.com/local/story/838823.html

He was in Buenos Aires, “recharging”. I guess his return means Argentina has an extradition treaty with the U.S.

Makeithurt June 24, 2009 at 8:36 am

Facelift.

ph7 June 24, 2009 at 9:16 am

[re=346068]Unlearned Hand[/re]: Lots of entertainment opportunities in Buenos Aires for American politicos.

caieva June 24, 2009 at 9:52 am

NO-ONE takes a last minute trip to Argentina – 10 hour flight minimum. All those journalists need to do is figure out when he actually bought the ticket for the house of lies to collapse and soon they will find – what – the furry he was meeting?

Crazybroad June 24, 2009 at 10:01 am

The AP really needs to stop with the cutbacks in the research department. ZZZ. The Wonketeers did a better job.

Leopolt June 24, 2009 at 10:22 am

[re=346053]Roslin[/re]: Or how about Pappy O’Daniel, and his Light Crust Doughboys? Or Gov. Hogg and his lovely daughter, Ima? I agree – some Loozyana weirdness definitely rubbed off west of the Sabine.

TGY June 24, 2009 at 10:27 am

What would we do without this masterful summary?

DanielG June 24, 2009 at 11:13 am

What about Edwin Edwards of Louisiana?
When told of Gary Hart’s Donna Rice problem, he recalled William Broadhurst, owner of the Turnberry Isle boat-with-a-girl operation. Shaking his head sadly, he said, “Old Billy B. He was a little more discreet when he was pimping for me.”
And Edwin’s campaign bumper sticker when David Duke opposed him: “Vote for the Crook. Its important.” Or is it impawdent?
Like John Gotti though not lethal, EE stiffed the Fed prosecutors once … twice … three times(!), before yielding to a conviction no one would hold against him in La. Gambling? So what!

Vermonster June 24, 2009 at 11:23 pm

Far as I know, Vermont hasn’t had a crazy Governor, unless you count Howard Dean’s scream…

Zorg June 25, 2009 at 2:15 pm

[re=346053]Roslin[/re]: The demonstration was held on the campus of the University of Houston, known back in those innocent days as “Cougar High” for it’s sports mascot, an actual, live catamount kept in a cage on campus, and the “High” part for the school’s open admissions policy. The demonstrators were demanding the release of a political activist who had been send to prison for one “joint” of “muggles” or “boo” (as addicts refer to marijuana) named Lee Otis. So, poor old Preston heard their chant as frijoles, which is kinda understandable if you have a group of people yelling “Free Lee Otis” in less than perfect unison. Leopolt’s bringing up the name of W. Lee “Pass the biscuits, Pappy” O’Daniel is another good one. More recently, there was Big John Connally, who died broke after trying to get rich in a Houston real estate boom. He managed to mix a very distinguished political career with all sorts of frantic scamming after money. Texas, fuck yah!

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