• May 26, 2012
AWFUL HUMAN BEINGS

June 16, 2009

Steve King, You Sure Are One Very Evil Goblin!

by Jim Newell  

Iowa Rep. Steve King, easily one of the top five House wingnuts and perhaps the most overtly evil and sneering one, has this to say about why we shouldn’t close Guantanamo Bay (where we could still keep the innocent Uighurs, whose imminent release was ordered by a federal court in 2008):

We could avoid this criticism and shut down an operation that has actually been built up to accommodate the people that are there now, including the Uighurs, who are now wasting away in MargaUighurville from what I understand. I can’t even say it because I get Jimmy Buffett and Warren Buffett mixed up, I think.

He and his friend then laugh at the very funny joke!

America sure does have a lot to be proud of with this whole Uighur situation, Steve! Ha ha ha! We hope that no one attends your funeral when you die!

[Think Progress]

{ 59 comments }

Jukesgrrl June 16, 2009 at 4:22 pm

How did those nicey-nice pie bakers from Iowa elect this Snidely Whiplash?

thefrontpage June 16, 2009 at 4:25 pm

Maybe people like Steve King should be kept locked up down at Guantanamo.

Mr Blifil June 16, 2009 at 4:25 pm

That was good. I liked that.

Accordion-o-rama June 16, 2009 at 4:28 pm

Jimmy Buffett, Warren Buffett, all those white folks’ names sound alike.

rambone June 16, 2009 at 4:28 pm

My understanding is that an innocent muslin is still a muslin. Ergo they should still be in prison praying to their muslin jeebus.

floraway June 16, 2009 at 4:29 pm

Never go west of Des Moines while in Iowa. You’ll regret it. It is a terrifying place and almost as boring to drive through as Nebraska. It is basically Kansas.

echoman2000 June 16, 2009 at 4:30 pm

something tells me he’s way overdue for a “larry craig wide stance” moment.

pedestrian rage June 16, 2009 at 4:30 pm

Steve King is a reprehensible turd who unfortunately represents my ancestral lands in western Iowa Every time he makes one of these “jokes” I end up calling his office, masquerading as an Iowan, and demanding answers c/o Rural Route 1, ass scratch, Iowa. Then my parents get involved and it’s a whole THING.

What a relief to move to MN & be just one district away from that screechy Michelle Bachman. Progress!

CorkPopper June 16, 2009 at 4:30 pm

What’s up with all the Uighur-hating wingnuts? The Uighurs hate Godless Communist China. They want their FREEEEDOM. Shouldn’t the wingnuts be making common cause, for the sake of DEMOCRACY which we get to keep because of our brave men and women in uniform? Why do the wingnuts hate our military?

AxmxZ June 16, 2009 at 4:32 pm

“Weevils, Uighurs, niggers – bug spray them all and let Jesus sort them out.”

lawrenceofthedesert June 16, 2009 at 4:32 pm

It’s not easy being known as the “other” Steven King; makes you resentful, full of rage — a bit like some of the characters in the fiction of the REAL Steven King. Makes you want to hit somebody other than your same old wife and dog, y’know? Kickin’ some little brown guy when he’s down, how much harm can it do?

Lord Growing June 16, 2009 at 4:33 pm

Even John Kerry’s got better writers than this clown.
Anyway, we need to protest his office until we get at least three increasingly sincere apologies.

OzoneTom June 16, 2009 at 4:33 pm

At first I thought that was a picture of Vladimir Putin.

But no, King’s not that good-looking. And thankfully nowhere near as smart.

Formerly Preferred June 16, 2009 at 4:34 pm

So, the thing about Jimmy Buffett and Warren Buffett is that they are actually related. Which does nothing to explain why Warren Buffett has anything to do with any of this, unless King is suggesting that we should lock up the Oracle of Omaha, for some reason.

echoman2000 June 16, 2009 at 4:35 pm

[re=340182]pedestrian rage[/re]: you’re very brave. that puts you within radiation poisoning distance of bachman. haz mat! haz mat!

norbizness June 16, 2009 at 4:35 pm

I keep Steve King and a steaming pile of recently deposited elephant shit mixed up, forgive me.

Crab1 June 16, 2009 at 4:36 pm

My mom writes his jokes, apparently.

The Unfairman June 16, 2009 at 4:37 pm

[re=340182]pedestrian rage[/re]:

Hey, we need more liberal wingnuts here, goodonya. Wanna play trivia at the Leaning Tower of Pizza in Uptown? We could use another good wo/man.

We definitely have the funniest congresspeople.

thefrontpage June 16, 2009 at 4:38 pm

Did Warren Buffett write “Why Don’t We Get Drunk and Screw?”

JMP June 16, 2009 at 4:38 pm

Funny, because I get Steve King and Stephen King mixed up. And we could avoid this idiocy if the Congressman had been the one run over by a van (and he didn’t have an 11-year-old gunslinger to sacrifice his life to save him).

qwerty42 June 16, 2009 at 4:39 pm

[re=340183]CorkPopper[/re]: What’s up with all the Uighur-hating wingnuts?
they have a funny, are Muslin. ’nuff said. what are you, some commie pinko liberal bleeding-heard socialist atheistic gay abortionistic aclu traitor? ’cause those are the onlyist folks who would object to gitmo. who would jeebus torture? ask yerself that.

Scarab June 16, 2009 at 4:40 pm

Afterwards, back in his office, Rep. King was seen high-fiving his speechwriter.

bitchincamaro June 16, 2009 at 4:40 pm

Yeah, Steve King, Larry King, King Shit. All the same.

bored with gravity June 16, 2009 at 4:40 pm

[re=340189]OzoneTom[/re]: But does Sarah Palin keep an eye on King when he rears his head?

Accordion-o-rama June 16, 2009 at 4:42 pm

MagyarUighurville = Hungary?

SayItWithWookies June 16, 2009 at 4:45 pm

We let a delegation from China abuse the Uighurs? Wow. No wonder Obama wants to keep a lot of the details of the ugliness of the previous eight years secret — there would be no freaking end to the prosecutions.

So bring it on, I say.

Mr Blifil June 16, 2009 at 4:45 pm

The video cuts out just before he held his hands up in the devil’s horns sign and screamed “420++!!!”

Hooray For Anything June 16, 2009 at 4:46 pm

It is heartening to know, however, that at this very minute, two gay people could be getting married at the very court house of the very county seat that Steve King represents. So, suck it, King.

Crazybroad June 16, 2009 at 4:47 pm

[re=340188]Lord Growing[/re]: Right. All he’s gonna say is that he made the speech to the wrong session of Congress.

That, we should all be proud that the military is there to defend his right to be a bigot.

19kevin8 June 16, 2009 at 4:51 pm

Some people claim that there’s a Uighur to blaaaaame
But I know
It’s Darth Cheney’s fault
da-da-da-da-da

Min June 16, 2009 at 4:51 pm

I’ve heard from the evil goblin constituency, and they are all very offended at Wonkette’s implication that a loathesome bastard like Steve King is one of their own.

WhatTheHeck June 16, 2009 at 4:51 pm

I dunno. I think he’s as funny as a steaming pile of dung.

Extemporanus June 16, 2009 at 4:51 pm

Rep. Ed McMahon’s (R-Korbel) off-screen “Hey-O! I liked that!” was just icing on the goddamn fucking shitcake! Uigrrr!!!

chascates June 16, 2009 at 4:52 pm

So we imprison some Chinese Islamists with no connection to 9/11 and that are no danger to the United States. Torture them for over 5 years (with help from the Chinese government they despise) and then finally find a country willing to take them, as they would be further tortured or killed in their homeland of China.

NOW they have to be subjected to further vocal abuse just because we don’t have them to torment any more?

Joe the Truck Nutz June 16, 2009 at 4:53 pm

King is from Western Iowa. That’s our way around here of saying nicely that he isn’t one of us. Seriously folks, anything west of Des Moines and all you’re gonna get is Truck Nutz, a big helping of Jee-sus and maybe an Iowa State graduate or two.

Balls! June 16, 2009 at 4:55 pm

[re=340202]thefrontpage[/re]: I thought he wrote “Why Don’t we Get Rich and Screw”.

forgracie June 16, 2009 at 5:02 pm

[re=340185]AxmxZ[/re]: Cheney?

Seriously though. This facility built to accommodate these people–sounds like the West Palm Beach Marriot to hear him talking.

Extemporanus June 16, 2009 at 5:03 pm

[re=340215]SayItWithWookies[/re]: And the Uigrrr!!! spokesperson has stated repeatedly that—despite abuse, seven years in solitary, and more—they harbor absolutely no ill-will to the United State government or people. They deserve beach front Bermudan blowjobs forever!

And if there was any justice, Rep. King would be forced to give each of them their first one.

Come here a minute June 16, 2009 at 5:03 pm

“Four Uighurs in Paradise”?

dannyboyoh June 16, 2009 at 5:12 pm

You should all smoke pot! And we should legalize it!!! Then let them have cake!!!

SayItWithWookies June 16, 2009 at 5:13 pm

[re=340240]Extemporanus[/re]: For real — Steven King’s brutal desert god could learn a thing or two from the Uighurs’ forgiving desert god.

paintitblack June 16, 2009 at 5:19 pm

This is what happens with gerrymandering & redistricting. Redneck dumbfucks elect racist buttfucks to office. All we get is iggorant rants from hicksville making no sense. Dirty muzlins gonna get us booga booga, lock ‘em all up, show ‘em whose boss, yeah, go team go, USA! USA!

Joe the Truck Nutz June 16, 2009 at 5:25 pm

@paintitblack: There’s no way you could re-draw that district in the state of Iowa where a cretin like King wouldn’t win. Those who live here understand. Western Iowa is a giant expanse of fields, windmills, casinos, and slack-jawed folks who cling to guns or bibles (Both on Sundays). I’ve thought of petitioning the state legislature to scede the western portion of the state to one of the Dakotas or, better yet, Missouri. It could be their own little version of Michigan’s UP.

TGY June 16, 2009 at 5:28 pm

He should stop fucking around with this stuff and get back to writing horror novels.

SayItWithWookies June 16, 2009 at 5:41 pm

On September 2, 1939, in the wake of Hitler’s invasion of Poland, English PM Neville Chamberlain released four Uighur prisoners to Bermuda. Do we really want to repeat that mistake?

hobospacejunkie June 16, 2009 at 5:51 pm

Where’s your penis now, King, huh? Where’s your penis now??

El Pinche June 16, 2009 at 5:55 pm
gurukalehuru June 16, 2009 at 5:55 pm

Between Chuck “The Nail” Grassley and this jerk, Iowa is making its move in the “Which state has the most retarded Republican” competition.

CornFedIABoy June 16, 2009 at 6:10 pm

@TruckNutz: Even we ISU grads don’t like King all that much.

I think half the folks in NW Iowa that vote for him do so because they actually agree with him and the other half just want to keep him in D.C. so he doesn’t try to run for Governor.

I’d also refine the scary line from west of Des Moines to west of Hwy 71.

SPlaTz June 16, 2009 at 6:22 pm

hahahahahahahahahahah, false imprisonment for 7 years! hahahahahah…
hahahahaha racist puns, hahahahahah
hahahaha…..oh, I’m crying.
He so funny!!!

Gads!

Lionel Hutz Esq. June 16, 2009 at 6:40 pm

I’m starting to see why Sarah Palin is considered an intellectual light of the Republican Party.

Lascauxcaveman June 16, 2009 at 6:50 pm

Steve! Ha ha ha! We hope that no one attends your funeral when you die!

Can we go if we promise to piss on his grave?

FlownOver June 16, 2009 at 7:28 pm

[re=340320]gurukalehuru[/re]: Forgettaboutit. We’ve retired the traveling trophy here in Kansas. Republican former chairman of the “intelligence” Committee Roberts, Foot-washin’ Sam Brownback, and it goes downhill from there.

zhubajie June 16, 2009 at 8:05 pm

[re=340215]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Yes, someone would probably suggest that each Uighur sue the feds, the Marines, etc.

Zhu Bajie

zhubajie June 16, 2009 at 8:09 pm

[re=340357]CornFedIABoy[/re]: I have a sneaky feeling my dad voted for this guy….

Zhu Bajie

Manos: Hands of Fate June 16, 2009 at 10:12 pm

I’ve never been more proud to be an American.

pedestrian rage June 16, 2009 at 11:12 pm

[re=340273]paintitblack[/re]: Point of order, paint: Iowa actually has one of the fairest redistricting systems in the country, with a nonpartisan board that actual draws them contiguously & c. Ergo, King’s voters are freely associated, self-aggregated redneck dumbfucks.

You’re welcome.

nader paul kucinich gravel June 17, 2009 at 2:37 am

Such honesty, compassion, intelligence, & guts!

A Federal Reserve Patriot
An AIPAC Patriot
a 911 Patriot

ill duce June 17, 2009 at 10:22 am

“Never go west of Des Moines while in Iowa. You’ll regret it. It is a terrifying place and almost as boring to drive through as Nebraska.”

You’re right. I grew up in Council Bluffs on the west side. I cringe everytime I return. Nothing but casinos, white trash and meth.

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