Hey so what ever happened to that hilarious Big Hollywood thing, about how all the motion pictures these days are gay? Ah, it’s still there and, uh… lookin’ good. “Dear Mr. President, Please Don’t Kill My Kids.” Ha ha, Jesus. “Soon my children will be driving and buying cars of their own. Mr. President, will you allow them to have freedom of choice or will you doom them to take their chances in a 21st century AMC Gremlin?” DOOM, DOOM! [Big Hollywood]
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{ 53 comments }
Max speed 45mph.
There. Happy?
Freedom of choice is something that gay-hatin’ conservatives are very big on, so this makes a lot of sense.
Yeah, yeah, Bubba, just think how you’ll feel when my kids blast past yours in their ion-powered jet packs.
Y’know if you follow this logic, every time one douche buys a car bigger than any other on the road, we ALL need to buy a car just as big, otherwise Mr. Big Car Douche will kill us. Which, of course, is OUR moral failing for not being protective enough. Well, hell, we should all be driving 18-wheelers right?
Hey, higher the suv, the closer to god, right?
But Jim, as I was trying to get out of that lunacy I ended up here:
http://reaganiterepublicanresistance.blogspot.com/
Thanks.
I have found my exact opposite.
[re=339436]SayItWithWookies[/re]:
Hell, even Lord Ronnie let y’all go 55…exceptin’ fer that hagar fellla
You never heard shit like this during the Iraq War because Republicans never let their kids serve in the Military.
Wow…that was a horribly written piece of shit. This dude has a blog…and people read it? Crazy world.
[re=339441]mrsixinch[/re]: Right on…it’s a fucking auto arms race.
For some reason I just read that whole thing. Check this out:
On Dec. 12, 1974, my grandparents were driving home when a vehicle traveling 50 miles per hour hit them. On March 17, 2002, I was driving home when a vehicle driving traveling 50 miles per hour hit me.
My grandparents were killed instantly. I lived. My grandparents were driving an AMC Gremlin. I was driving a Dodge 3500 diesel dually pickup truck.
Now guess what the lesson he learns from this is:
a) 1974 sucked.
b) Cars are safer now — yay technology and regulations!
c) Ralph Nader was right.
d) They fuckin’ died, okay? If they had had an 8,000 pound truck this wouldn’ta happened! And now you’ve sold Hummer to the Chinese! Hippies constantly cut off my Hummer and give me the finger and almost kill me! And now Obama’s gonna take my freedom away and give my beautiful children tinfoil death boxes that they can be fuckin’ buried in after they’re crushed by an 18-wheeler on the drive home from (sob) — church.
Drama Queen much?
…geez, relax buddy! Liberals are only interested in killing your kid prior to the end of the 3rd trimester! Don’t worry, your little repressed homosexuals and future drunken pole dancers have a bright future ahead of them!!!
…P.S. Anyone who wears a hat like that deserves to be beaten with a pillowcase full of rusty drywall screws!
So doesn’t this mean that Obama killed his grandparents? Also?
[re=339445]MGBYG[/re]: That blog really shows the dark side of the internet. And no amount of education, reasoned discourse, or psychotropic drugs will help them. In addition to the idea to make XXX sites end in .sex I want these sites to end in .tool–just so I can avoid going to them by mistake.
Given their driving record, his family should probably concentrate more on improving their road skills and less on what they’re driving.
Jesus tap dancing Christ, this guy most think black helicopters are after him.
OBAMA WILL KILL YOUR BABIES
…“I was driving a Dodge 3500 diesel dually pickup truck.”
Is it me, or has this guy essentially admitted he has a small penis?!
And I LOVE the bullshit about how he is a fucking eco-SAINT at home. It’s just when it comes to cars, you know, there really are VERY few choices when it comes to automated transport these days, when it comes to cars FUCK EVERYTHING. Why doesn’t he drive a fucking 18-wheeler if he’s so fucking paranoid? God what tripe… also
[re=339464]chascates[/re]: Pouring bleach all over Firefox right now…
(and itz not as kinky as it may sound)
Aw, is my widdle snoogums hurt ’cause the big bad liberal meanies flip him off when they see him driving his big ol’ truck? Does my widdle snoogums need a cuddle? Don’t worry, you’re still a macho man. Yes you are!
Don’t worry, stud. If people keep driving Hummers there won’t BE a fucking planet for your kids to live on. In other words, your kids already do not have a future. There, problem solved. Sleep well.
Jesus Christ, man up there, Tinkerbell.
What happened to the car that hit his monster truck, ya think?
[re=339477]Internally valid[/re]: Further proof that the natural result of freedom of choice is MURDER.
[re=339469]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: If he even has one at all.
These people have gone around the bend.
Funny thing is, his diesel truck that killed somebody in a Gremlin or whatever, gets 20-25 mpg. That would be well within even heightened fuel efficiency standards for trucks. He now, however, drives an H2 which gets 10 mpg, and is also a horrible piece of eye-raping shit.
The cowboy hat and tough-guy pose do not make this moron’s rant sound less whiny.
By his own reasoning, no one should be allowed on the roads unless they drive a Mac truck.
Matthew Broderick’s Dance Double
OMG! We’re in the presence of Hollywood royalty!
Somebody has to do it.
~
[re=339451]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Kudos.
Mext topic for Big Hollywood: Mitt’s driving skills in France. Oopsie.
Biggie’s words are why we need a federal healthcare program which covers drugs such as Risperdal rather than just private insurers’ programs which will pay for Nico-Mints as first-line.
Oh, how I remember fondly the reign of W, when everyone was safe and the President killed nobody’s child.
Faster Obama! Kill! Kill!
Wow, if you think this Chris Buggered (sp?) is a twat, check out his retard commenters.
N0BAMA IZ TAKIN AAWAY UR CHILDRENS” RIGHTS TO DRIVE TANKSZ!!!!
Oh Jesus! Will no one think of the children?
There’s a couple running a place called Alaska this guy would love.
[re=339464]chascates[/re]: I certainly hope you got a copyright on “.tool.” There’s a future in that.
Did Andrew Breitbart kill the distribution deals for Jim Carey’s and Ewan MacGregor’s gay biopic “I Love You, Phillip Morris?” What with Hollywood being so totally under the control of the Gays, who underhandedly stole it from the Jews, I can’t think of another reason. This Breitbart is obviously a force to be reckoned with, being in league with Jesus and all, Wonkette, so I’d be careful…
[re=339464]chascates[/re]: I want these sites to end in .tool
That’s funny. You always start up making it look like you’re heading down the conventional road of funny and then you take us on a weird turn into absurdity. Which I appreciate.
[re=339445]MGBYG[/re]: Thanks for that link. I left him some dog doodie in his comments box, noticing too late that I must wait for the comment to be approved, which it most certainly will not, due to my use of words such as ‘jizz,’ ‘masturbate’ and ‘wingtard.’
Mr. Buggered has all kinds of visual dog whistle shit goin’ on, man. He’s got the I’m A Tough Motherfucker hat and the Don’t Fuck With Me stare. And as mentioned previously he’s got the Dammit Why Can’t I Find My Penis? automobile.
Jesus pig-fucking christ, man. OK, some people are into cars, that’s fine. But having the whole of your identity locked up in an overpriced, poorly manufactured asshole-mobile tends to call attention to certain personality disorders. Suffering from Complete Lack of Self-Awareness is a serious disease, people. It had goddamn better be in the DSM-V.
If reason was involved in this archaic, senseless beating on Chascates, most of you would be rightly accused of Sodomy, lackluster, tax evasion, and Antisemitism. The bastards.
This is exactly why I drive a dual steam locomotive to work, regardless of how hard it is to find a parking space.
[re=339437]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: You mean gay-hating, abortion-hating freedom of choice
Every patriotic American needs a JL421 Badonkadonk.
So the GOP are a bunch of Nader-tards now?
[re=339460]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: …and I’ll bet he’s got TruckNuts, also. (I actually managed to get in the first ‘TruckNuts’ reference in this thread – Yay!)
If you want to make sure your kids give better than they get in an accident, have them pack Smith & Wessons. Problem solved.
This just proves that shitty driving is in the genes since EVERY MEMBER OF THIS IDIOT’S FAMILY crashes their cars at 50 mph.
and according to his bio, in high school he was “a member of the jazz band, a singer and an actor in musicals. ” so it’s also a safe bet this right wing nut secretly rides the vein train to a-town.
Fuck it, I’m getting a tank so I can smash everyone on the road and ain’t so socialist President gonna stop me.
Hmmm. Okay, let me see if I understand this. He drives a portable 4000 lb penis, but uses solar power to power his “ranch”? There’s an easy explanation for that one – his ranch, let’s call it the Rockin’ D Ranch, is out in the middle of effing nowhere, 300 miles from the nearest power grid. It is a bunker, 10 stories below the earth. They recycle urine for drinking water, have a year’s supply of potatoes and beef jerky to eat, shit into latrines that turn and spend much time reading Revelations and fopping it to Kirk Cameron “Left Behind” videos. Does this guy live is west Texas? Or is he one of Layne’s neighbors in the CA desert?
[re=339625]nailsinthecoffin[/re]: Sounds like Idaho to me. Maybe he and Larry Craig are neighbors.
[re=339611]guerilla-nation[/re]: Yeah, his bio was alllll about excuses. “While dating a ballerina, Burgard decided to take up ballet dancing”. Uh huh. Nothing like a bitter closet case with a small wang. Trust me dude, the gays don’t want ya anyway.
[re=339591]zebubull[/re]: Love how “people who bought [the JL421] also bought”
o stink bombs;
o ass spray;
o fart spray;
o ass fart spray.
Love that new car smell!
[re=339462]Blender[/re]: Obama killed his grandparents? Naw it was Nixon who killed Grammy an Pappy.
Gremlins are actually far heavier cars than anything else in their size (Pintos, Vegas). Heavy solid with relatively largish engines. My brother killed a Chev Nova with one back in the day. Prolly more steel than the un-named German car his wife was driving.
Funny how everybody is always running into his family. Its never ever their fault. Maybe they outght to ride a bus, they are really really big.
He didn’t mention whether dead people were wearing seat belts or not. Prolly not in ’74. So was he? Prolly in 2002.
Hummer H2, a Suburban for people who want one that is heavier and less capable.
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