Wonkette
When scholars of the future — otherwise known as “Roombas” — look back at our chaotic and moronic first decade of the 21st Century, they will have nothing but faded printouts of vulgar old web pages for source material. “Why were there so many pictures of Truck Nutz and watermelon gardens around the Executive Mansion?”, the Roombas will ask each other, in robotic voices.
It’s all about CONTEXT, Ken.
As long as they capture the eerie similarity between Sonia and that ungodly Jonah-K-Lo hybrid, this is fine with me.
Hey! Ken! Sara K. said you were playing hooky today. Change your mind?
I’m so happy to know that “buttsecks” is now a legitimate search term in the Library of Congress card catalogue.
Library of Congress FAIL.
Those who forget about the past are deemed to be damned lucky they don’t have to relive all the awful satire.
And the answer will be, “Also.”
How do they know there will be just one Supreme Court nomination in 2009?
It’ll be touching to know that your legacy is intact. And maybe some 22nd century vulgarian will be sporting a pair of SpaceshipNutz due to Wonkette’s valiant efforts. Excuse me, there’s something in my eye.
I’m updating my resume to include my contribution to “Historical documents archived in the Library of Congress.”
Wow, they are really holding the slot between the White House website and Wikipedia for you!
http://www.loc.gov/law/find/sotomayor.php
The Library of Congress simply does not care for our claims of illegitimacy.
The thought of indexing the Wonkette archives should make most librarians (at LOC or elsewhere) want to party like Parker Posey after doing a speedball.
When I do my thesis on buttsex (it’s on my bucket list), I can now consider y’all to be a credible source!
1) Trucknutz
(Wonkette: Online, 06/15/2009).
Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
Furries of the future will rely on Wonkette for what it was like to be a furry in these historic times.
Words: Perhaps he is on a non-furlough just like all of those people in the New York Times. Wonkette doesn’t allow for frivolous things like vacations or days off!
I love my roomba, and gladly cede sovereignty to her.
Yes You Can Own A Piece of History says at 12:58 pm, June 15th, 2009 -
What a great day it will be when we finally see a furry president. Hopefully a pedo in a brown bear suit.
When scholars of the future — otherwise known as “Roombas.”
Nonsense. Billy Basses will be the scholars of the future.
So this comment will someday be studied by future internet historians at Harvard?
HOLY TRUCKCUNTZ ALSO FUCKSHIT FURRY DICKJAM FOUR BLOCKS CRYSTAL PEPSI!!!!!!!!!3!!!!!!!!!
(let’s see them try to parse that one a hundred years from now…)
Wonkette is the type of historic Internet material that would refuse to be anthologized by any collection that would have it as a member.
History will tell lies as usual.
By the end of teh 21st century, no “Libraries” will exist. All human communication will be conducted on comment threads. Also “teh” will be a real word, also.
orange: I’m sick of the brown bears taking all of the jobs.
The time: the year 2509
The place: a fetid garbage pile near the former NYC
Giant radioactive cockroach #1: Greetings, Newt, lovely day. I see that you are enjoying the garden. May your truknutz always hang well!
Giant radioactive cockroach #2: Felicitations, Bolton! May your bag of flaming dicks always be tasty.
Giant radioactive cockroach #1: Good news, I have received a grant to research Teh Sacred Archivz.
Giant radioactive cockroach #2: Dear Dog, the classic ur-text!
Giant radioactive cockroach #1: Totes. Well, gotta run. Also!
Giant radioactive cockroach #2: Also!
Will they review this material before of after the Alien Overlords wipe out all life on this planet because if they are going to do it before, really, what’s the point?
WadISay: oh. wow. also.
We’re definitely some sort of cultural afterbirth. Oh, ARTIFACT? No, not that.
Is this like the official government version of “Comment of the Day”?
WadISay: Needs more buttsecks. Also.
And they will marvel at the relevance of the contextual ads, like “Chat Live With Hot Singles in Your Zip Code.” Sweet.
The Roombahs will not want to have to guess what Newt meant by “Esthonian,” whereas Ken minds his t’s and h’s.
WadISay: That is so splendid, I have no words.