Wonkette
- Galileo proved ages ago that “crime increases proportionally with the height of housing project buildings,” and after a thorough review by the Pontifical Council for Culture, the Catholic Church even forgave him for it. But guess what? Sonia-Maria Sotomayor grew up in the grandest housing project on the Eastern Seaboard, and she doesn’t even sell dime bags! [John McWhorter]
- Oh NO! The National Arbitration Forum ruled that Sneaky Joseph Culligan will be allowed to keep BillClintonsTentaclePornEmporium.net and a myriad of other domain names Bill Clinton desperately wanted for himself. [HuffPost]
- There are unconfirmed Rumors on the Internets claiming Erick Erickson has reached his 34th year, which is pretty outrageous considering Jesus didn’t even live that long. Whatever: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERICK! [RedState]
- Observe the many ways in which Barack Obama and Ronald Reagan are frighteningly similar: Reagan invented Reaganomics, Obama invented Socialism. Reagan bought guns and gave them to right-wing death squads in Central America, Obama bought toxic bank assets and gave them to the Sandinistas. Can you think of two more examples, for extra-credit? [Washington Whispers]
1: Both were associated with lower primates during their careers.
2: Nancy scared the shit out them.
Reagan was an stupid man who served as a puppet for his corrupt party and the president who began the process of permanently screwing average citizens and in turn, America, while Obama is a smart leader with a vision of a great America. Other than that, I’d say they are exactly the same.
If it’s his 34th birthday, that means he’s starting his 35th year. Think about it.
They both lived the family values they professed? No, wait…
Reagan pissed on poor schoolchildren while trying to classify ketchup as a vegetable.
Obama pissed on rich people while mainlining Dijon.
So, yeah, pissing and condiments.
boatapple: My head just exploded.
1. Both lived in the White House.
2. Obama is black.
I suck at this.
Riley, FTW. Physics, and Judge Maria. Double bonus score!
Umm…Reagan and Obama both avoided military service and they…both fucked Nancy?
It is a little known fact that Obama is also a washed-up actor whose fans never got over seeing him in his on-screen get-up. Except for Reaganites it was cowboy-sheriff get-up, and for Obama, that little thing he wore on his thing in “Naughty Nairobi Nights Vol VIII.”
1. Both men had a landing strip pubic shaving.
2. Both wish Sean Hannity would just STFU about them.
Galileo, Aristotle, this is all just a West Wing episode isn’t it?
So Erick Erickson and Poppy Bush are both Geminis? Shit, looks like Paul McCartney and I have a lot to make up for.
Reagan had a secretary named Kennedy
Obama had a secretary named Lincoln
They’re both clean and well-spoken.
1. both good at telling “jokes” 2. both love jellybeans (who doesn’t?)
Angie Jolie turns 34 today - does that mean anything?
Reagan ended the Cold War, and Obama is a hot piece…
1. Both reached out to Iran; one with words, the other with big sales on bombs.
2. One created record deficits; the other was handed record deficits.
3. Both are imagined by wignuts as being far different from what they actually are/were.
Neither one invaded Iraq by accident.
drewonline: It means that the world’s hawtest 33 y.o. is now the world’s hawtest 34 y.o. Isn’t she some sort of UN Ambassatrix of Hotness right now?
Ronald Reagan helped funnel hard drugs into the inner cities, and Barack Obama smoked all of them?
Mad Farmer Manifest: Since all Geminis are inherently gay, I’d say Erikson and Bush Sr. have some ’splaining to do.
1. Reagan is dead.
2. Obama is dead sexy.
Bill Clinton is just the kind of guy who would be into tentacle porn, isn’t he?
1. Both have been given comical nicknames by the commenters on HuffPo (Raygun & Obushma)
2. Both harbor a secret lust for Zachary Quinto.
Okay, number two is really just me.
I am sorry - could some please give me a shorter version of the McHo’er nonsense? I know he is wrong, of course, but I don’t have the inclination to read exactly how and why….
Min: Nice.
DangerousLiberal: It is true. She is even rumored to be able to heal the gay of megachurch pastors with her hawtness though I regard that as a vile canard.
Both are hosts of GE television programs. Reagan on General Electric Theater and Obama on NBC’s Inside the Obama White House .
OK, I’ll grant you that you were never caught selling dime bags. My question, Madam appointee is: Did you ever BUY dime bags? How about nickel bags?
problemwithcaring: The fact that Sonya Sotomayor came from a highrise housing project proves two things. Being born in a housing project is just like being born with a silver spoon in your mouth (except it’s plastic)Having sex with your Boxer is a pious, life affirming family activity unless it’s a gay Boxer in which case you need to hustle your pervert ass over to “ Saint Angelina of the Hawtness and git yer cure on.
Reagan rode a horse and thought Ted Kennedy was Satan.
Obama rides around on a hound of Satan given to him by Ted Kennedy.
Iran Contra. Iran Shukrantra.
1. Both once lived in Illinois
2. Both had white mothers.
3. Neither helped liberate Auschwitz (although one of them claimed to have done so)
1) Bonzo
2) Bush
1) Government cheese.
2) Nigguh pleez.
Both are carbon-based, bipedial lifeforms inhabiting the third planet orbiting a yellow dwarf star within the Orion arm of the Milky Way Galaxy. Am I close?
1) One started the political pendulum swinging to the right; the other grabbed it when it got out of control and started swinging it back to the left.
2) They both married fashion plates.
1. Both are named on Roland Burris’ oblisk.
2. Obama gained (more) popularity after having pirates shot in the head: Ronnie gained (another) wife after Nancy took a shot in the mouth.