our first lady is very tall

In Honor Of 80s Style Icon Nancy Reagan, Michelle Obama Wears Laura Ashley’s Couch

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They're going to resurrect the ghost of Mr. THuzzah our prayers have been answered! Courtesy of the White House comes this darling portrait of Mrs. Obama and whatsername, “Just Say No,” shortly before sitting down to a dignified First Ladies’ seance. [Official White House Photostream]

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Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

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Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • memzilla

    It looks like Michelle is reaching for the “off” switch on the Nancinator.

  • The Schadenfried PAC

    I hope someone told Nancy that the black lady is not her caregiver.

  • hockeymom

    Nice pearl necklace.

  • Texan Bulldoggette

    Michelle’s outfit looks like she just got off the boat (it’s a boat people reference, people). Stripes & flowers–really?

  • BillyClubb

    I wonder if Nancy was impressed with Michelle’s black magic.

  • Mr Blifil

    I initially read the title as “Laura Ashley’s Crotch.” Which would make for an interesting variation on a furry suit, I guss.

  • Gorillionaire

    Is that the outline of a secret passageway on the left side of the pic?

  • Doglessliberal

    Nancy’s face looks exactly the same, if not healthier–a little fuller and with more color, than it has for years. Is she subsisting on the stem cells of aborted spotted owls or something?

  • magic titty

    I hope she tells Nanc her husband was a shithead, to break the ice.

  • Canmon (the Inadequate)

    What’s behind that secret door over Nancy’s right shoulder?

  • norbizness

    Just say no to drugs, just say yes to lobster almondine-flavored mush.

  • Mr Blifil

    What was on the menu? I mean other than “hair pie” obviously.

  • Guppy06

    ZOMG, she touched Nancy! Scandal! Hue and cry!

  • MARCdMan

    [re=331936]Canmon (the Inadequate)[/re]: That’s the entrance to Karl Rove’s crypt. The Obama’s are turning it into a rumpus room.

  • donner_froh

    Twinset, pearls, linen skirt: Michelle can frump it up when she wants to.

  • paintitblack

    Scmancy’s all like: ya can touch Betty Windsor if that’s what she wants, but “we” don’t. So stop w/the hands-on already. Now go get me my coffee, servant, and tell the real First Lady that I’m not hanging around here much longer!

  • Mild Midwesterner

    Although ladies’ luncheons tend to favor chardonnay, I’d like to think that those two swapped stories over glasses of scotch.

  • lolwtfbbq

    I think poor Nancy is terrified by this new Amazonian housekeeper.

  • CockedAle

    Well, let’s see, Nancy is Cancer the crab, plays a minor role in the Twelve Labors of Hercule; they can appear formidable – thick-skinned, unemotional, uncompromising, and obstinately tenacious,
    Michelle, a Capricorn, is an independent, rocklike character that has many sterling qualities. They are normally confident, strong willed and calm. These hardworking, unemotional, shrewd, practical, responsible, persevering, and cautious to the extreme persons, are capable of persisting for as long as is necessary to accomplish a goal they have set for themselves.

  • ella

    Love Michelle but her pattern combo for those sweaters is totally a Glamour Don’t. All she needs is the little bar across her eyes to shield her identity.

  • Cape Clod

    “Yes, Mrs. Reagan. You’ve already told me the story about how you met Ronnie while filming Hellcats of the Navy, … at least five times.”

  • paintitblack

    [re=331957]ella[/re]: unfortunately: yes.

  • Baseproduct

    Michelle looks like she’s thinking, “This is not what I had planned to do twenty years ago, if I ever met this bitch.” Strange bedfellows, indeed.

  • MargeSimpsonsBlackFriend

    Ok, fashionistas, I kinda like the stripes + flowers. Maybe she was just trying to match the Reagan china that they used (classy!).

    No, really, what is with that secret door??

  • Servo

    [re=331935]magic titty[/re]:
    Michelle should give that honor to Oliver North.

  • KAR

    [re=331967]MargeSimpsonsBlackFriend[/re]: It’s the outline of King Dub-ya’s throne. Cheney made him delegate from the dining room so as not to interfere with the real business of America- torture, lies, economic meltdown, etc.

  • El Pinche

    The headline to this post takes about 20.2332 seconds to strike my funny balls (my funny organ happens to be my balls instead of the standard bone).

  • Origami

    Is she using the FDR luncheon china?
    Nancy Regean is spinning in her grave.

  • octupletsmom

    Michelle’s smile says she didn’t say no to drugs today. She just had to ask for something to get her through the seven-hundred-and-sixty-six “Dear Ronnie, back in the day” stories that she’s gonna have to sit through during lunch.

  • Texan Bulldoggette

    Hey, all, Kung Fu guy David Carradine is dead:


    I suspect erotic asphyxiation….but I generally look for the weirdest in everyone.

  • dijetlo

    Mr T is DEAD !!!!!

    Smothered when the auto fan malfunctioned on his “Pit Bull” furry suit no doubt.

    A nation mourns…

  • Min

    Someone needs to wrestle Shelley to the ground and refuse to let her up, until she agrees to stop wearing those damn cardigans.

    Nancy actually looks pretty good. How old is she now, 110?

  • dijetlo

    [re=331981]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: He hung himself in fit of depression when he realized “Black Chop” Epstein stole his Mojo.

    A nation mourns…some more.

  • June Cleaver 2.0

    The repubs’ heads must be exploding to have the Obamas take over their god’s wife for awhile. When Obama signed the bill thingy on Reagan, the frail, old lady placed her hand on his shoulder warmly, and engaged in small talk with him. It was nice to see, and satisfying to know that Obama and Michelle give the repubs heartburn and high blood pressure.

  • Roger the Shrubber

    When the dog bites
    When the bee stings
    When I’m feeling sad
    I simply remember my favorite things
    And then I don’t feel so bad

  • Joshua Norton

    Looks like someone climbed up to the attic to dig out those god-awful red dishes that Nancy picked out with the guidance of Miss Cleo.

  • ioksotot23

    NO! to drugs….$billions
    YES! to stem cells….untold amounts of political reputation

    Hundreds of thousands dead and disappeared in Nicaragua, El Salvador, Guatemala…


  • thejesusandmarycheney

    Look at Miss Not-Proud-to-Be-An-American-until-2008, towering over Nancy like her shit don’t stink. They should have put Nancy in those FDR leg braces and on a box so as to convey the glorious stature appropriate of she who is semidivine by virtue of receiving The Gipper’s spermatic injections.

  • Joshua Norton

    That outline on the wall behind them is where the dartboard with Ronnie’s face usually hangs.

  • Wet Blanket

    And that’s the same fireplace Nancy burned all her tear-soaked confessions about wanting to murder babies in order to save hubby from Alzheimer’s but she was too scared of this radical idea… until science found a way.

  • Rusty Shackleford

    [re=331981]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Koko Taylor too. Guess they finally Killed Bill. I has a sad! :(

  • Squiggyfm

    The secret door leads to the Koran Room where Obama destroys the Constitution by shouting Muslimy words at it.

  • NoWireHangers

    Is that a secret door! Look there! To the left of Nancy, under the portrait? There might be a doorknob coming out of Nancy’s ear but it’s hard to tell from this angle. It could also be an evil spirit escaping from her brain. Secret doars!!1!

  • Joshua Norton

    Nancy’s upset because she has to keep reminding Shelly that it’s “serve from the left, clear from the right” – and why does this pushy Negress keep touching me?

  • genericuserid

    What’s Michelle doing molesting the Queen Mum, here?! Just pawing her way through every Royal she can find, huh?

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=331957]ella[/re]: Michelle’s simply following an old if slightly obscure fashion rule — when you’re going to be seen with an older lady who may or may not still be all there, make sure you wear something slightly loopy. Not too loopy as to be really obtrusive, but loopy enough to take the edge off if the older lady shows up in paisley and checkers, for instance.

    Also, it’s not a secret passageway. Little-known fact — LBJ had urinals installed in every room of the WH, hidden behind panels so he’d never have far to go to pee.

  • azw88

    [re=331933]Gorillionaire[/re]: not so secret. there is a door handle there, near Nancy’s head. You probably thought it some orb attached to the right side of her head that gave he a direct feed from her astrologer.

  • Mad Farmer Manifest

    [re=332044]SayItWithWookies[/re]: “Also, it’s not a secret passageway. Little-known fact — LBJ had urinals installed in every room of the WH, hidden behind panels so he’d never have far to go to pee.”

    I can’t tell if your joking or not. This would almost make sense when you consider that he would make people talk to him while he took a dump. I can easily see him peeing into the wall while everyone behind him tries to continue eating like nothing is happening.

  • Capricatony

    “Welfare queen this, bitch.”

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=332056]Mad Farmer Manifest[/re]: I can’t tell if your joking or not.

    Mission accomplished, then. Actually, many fancy dining rooms have servant’s passages to the kitchen so the dinner guests don’t have to squeeze past them in the hallway. This is what a lifetime of watching Masterpiece Theater gets you.

  • Zach

    What the hell is up with the secret door in the wall in the background of that photo? I thought this was the white house, not Wayne Manor.

  • commiegirl

    [re=331928]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: It’s a little dismaying, no? Who’d think Nancy’d be lookin’ all fresh and classy in black and white, and Michelle would go for Clown?

  • Joshua Norton

    I get the feeling that Nancy is looking around wondering when they remodeled the Simi Valley IHop, and if her coupon for the Early Bird Special is still good.

  • prizepig

    If there was ever a situation where it would be appropriate for Michelle to call someone “whitey” …

  • queeraselvis v 2.0

    Oh y’all, quit hating on Michelle’s pink chintz ensemble. After all, Nancy looks as though she’s about two seconds away from needing her diapers changed.

  • zenferret

    Believe it or not, the “Cosmetology Room” is behind that door…

    JFK used it as a changing room.

    Bess Truman used it as her office.

    Nancy probably keep the astrologers in there.

  • DoctorCulturae

    Actually, not seen in the photo are the WH help, who all wore the identical outfit Michelle has on. And since most of them are black, Ms. Nancy said, “I’m sorry, which one of you is Michelle?” To which Michelle answered, “We all look alike don’t we Mrs. Reagan, that’s the point. Welcome back to Washington. We all have to be cleaning up after you people.”

  • thefrontpage

    Interestingly, Mary Lincoln, Mamie Eisenhower, Eleanor Roosevelt, Jackie Kennedy, Pat Nixon, Betty Ford, Rosalyn Carter, Lady Bird Johnson, Barbara Bush, Laura Bush, and Margaret Truman were also at the lunch!

  • SwanSwanH

    [re=331936]Canmon (the Inadequate)[/re]: Sinatra.

  • One Yield Regular

    I suspect that’s Nancy’s “special meal” request laid out before her, consisting of a glass of water and a glass of gin, with salt and pepper for supplemental nutrition.

  • FlownOver

    [re=332124]DoctorCulturae[/re]: Also not visible in photo (under table): Mr. T.

  • ZorinZorin


  • stink, but

    this picture of Michelle Obama awkwardly putting her arm around the Queen of England is OLD NEWS, Sara!

  • bonghitsforjesus

    Michelle Obama poses with the scarecrow for her new organic garden.

  • Lionel Hutz Esq.

    I’m pretty sure that Nancy is thinking “When did they start letting the help dress so casually? Damn Democrats!”

  • GinnyRED57

    Nancy was happy that the new black lady kept the china looking so nice. And she could see herself in that freakishly reflective tabletop!

  • ladymacbeth

    if that really is a secret door, it’s good we never had a real religious war. no priest would have survived that construction.

    though on the other hand, it would make me v v happy to hand james dobson over to oliver cromwell.


    As the conversation turned to the White House garden, the thought bubble over Nancy Raygun:

    “Do not mention roots. Do not mention melons. Do not mention sharecropper…”