Former AIG Building Will Likely Be Sold For $100 A Square Foot

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Sold, to a foreigner probablyIs that insanely cheap for commercial real estate? Seems like! Anyhow, the haunted million-square-foot carcass of the former AIG headquarters at 70 Pine and 72 Wall Street in beautiful New York City appears to have found a buyer for the bargain-basement price of $100 million. Who’s the lucky winner, Donald Trump? The Cato Institute? The buyers “would have been carefully vetted,” a source told the New York Post, from which we can conclude it’s just Tom Daschle wasting the last of his lunch money. [New York Post]

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Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

View all articles by Sara K. Smith

Hola wonkerados.

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38 comments

  1. Inadequate Blackmail

    If I’d only heard about this sooner, 3 square feet of that bitch would have been mine! Just need enough space to keel over and die on.

  2. thefrontpage

    Someone said it’s going to be either a Starbucks, a CVS, or an Olive Garden–you know, because we don’t have enough of those already.

  3. Crab1

    Can I assume that every Wonkette commenter has an extra $300? I’d rather spend my $300 on a new bong and some Northern Lights.

  4. Inadequate Blackmail

    [re=330822]Larry McAwful[/re]: Well, damn. Maybe we could go in together and they’d cut us a deal. 7 square feet for the price of 6.

  5. SayItWithWookies

    “The buyers would have been carefully vetted because neither AIG nor the brokers at CB Richard Ellis want to have egg on their faces”

    Well of course — AIG has a reputation to protect, and they certainly don’t want to be known for diving into a deal without being aware of the consequences.

  6. ProfessorJukes

    The only biz that’s up in this economy is either porn or booze. So I’m hoping a ‘full-service’ bar/resort/IMAX porn theater… with Swinger’s Suites. Elliot Spitzer will be your Activities Director.

  7. Come here a minute

    Sichuan Tengzhong Heavy Industrial Machinery Company will be building Hummers there.

  8. WadISay

    If they’re selling trade fixtures, I would be interested in the solid gold urinals and the alter where they sacrificed recent Harvard MBAs in front of an image of Gordon Gekko.

  9. Min

    appears to have found a buyer for the bargain-basement price of $100 million

    You mean they’re getting the whole building for the price of the basement? That’s some shrewd haggling, right there. Do you think the new owners would have time to run GM?

  10. Larry Fine

    Former Governor Spitzer’s real estate company bought it, and will turn it into a classy brothel.

  11. Noodle Salad

    Mark Penn is setting up the new Bowser’s castle after MariObama blew up the last one.

  12. Mild Midwesterner

    That makes Manhattan real estate cheaper than my house in DC. Apparently DC really is now the world’s financial capital. How depressing.

  13. Larry McAwful

    [re=330833]Inadequate Blackmail[/re]: I’m game. Maybe we could open a newspaper stand, and then apply for a bailout.

  14. lizard scum

    [re=330845]ProfessorJukes[/re]: Don’t forget fast food services for the “resort.” Imagine a food court, but no mall!

  15. StoneAge

    Wait, I thought we each owned a piece of it already. When do we move in? Or do we each get a Pontiac, I forget.

  16. DC Hates Me

    I’m pretty sure the Cato Institute is a front group for poor crazed unsexed losers.

  17. ForTheTurnstiles

    [re=330866]DC Hates Me[/re]: Poor crazed unsexed MALE losers. Poor crazed unsexed FEMALE losers have what? Oprah? Eckardt Tolle?

  18. SayItWithWookies

    China’s buying it — they’re going to use it to quarantine all their swine flu cases.

  19. drftjgoj

    It’s probably AON, since they also took over AIG’s sponsorship of Manchester United. And think of the savings in only needing to replace two letters on all the signs!

  20. paintitblack

    I heard Dickhead Cheney’s “new” company, Xe, is buying it for knock-out pricing…

  21. SayItWithWookies

    [re=330918]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: Wait — they need more than a PO Box?

  22. Bruno

    Can’t the US Government hire a bunch of jihadis to bring the thing down, or use some kind of super secret controlled implosion?

    It’s gotta be insured for more than $100/sq foot.

    (but send out a super secret twitter to all the Jews to make sure they don’t show up for work that day)

  23. Mr Blifil

    [re=330837]SayItWithWookies[/re]: That one leapt out at me too. The stuff just seems to write itself doesn’t it?

  24. Mr Blifil

    [re=330951]Bruno[/re]: How little you seem to know about the melting point of steel.

  25. tacodaemon

    That’s an awesome Art Deco building with gothic influences, one of my favorites in the city. (I think the building in the photo Sara put up there is AIG’s London headquarters, not the NYC one.)

  26. tacodaemon

    Also the building was originally built in the 30s as Citgo’s headquarters (some oldsters still call it the Cities Service Building). Maybe Hugo Chavez will want it back.

  27. TeddyS

    Bernie Madoff is handling the sale from his cell. Promises a nice 40 percent annual profit for all who invest early.

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