Peggy Noonan Displeased With Mika Brzezinski’s Vulgar Footwear

  satan

Peggy Noonan warped to MSNBC this morning for a pot of tea and pleasant conversation about the current Politicks, but what didst she see? The Devill-Womman, Mika Brzezinski, clad in vulgarian foot-leathers! “They were an X-rated fantasy walking on Mika’s feet,” our regina declares, and later she compounds that they are “a mortal sin, on her feet.” This demon bull whore Mika was later slaughtered, under Peggington’s watch. You may watch film-tapes of these events at the Arianna Huffington’s Internet Post, which darest not offer Em-Bed Code for its film-tapes. [Huffington Post]

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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

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43 comments

  1. Custerwolf

    Can someone PUH-lease take Joe’s under-used cock and shove it into Peggy’s over used mouth already?
    FUCK – when will teevee DIE????????!!!!!

  2. TGY

    She then retracted her criticism, saying “That was too harsh. I think we have to start showing empathy.”

    Why start now?

  3. memzilla

    Looks like Ambien and gin don’t mix, Peggington.

    On second thought — maybe they do!

  4. nappyduggs

    “Vulgerian foot leathers.”

    The same shite that was coming from The Nooner’s piehole is now conveniently located in my breetches. Thank you.

  5. SayItWithWookies

    Neo-Edwardian prudery is so damn complicated. How is it that raping the cabin boy is okay but shoes that (one presumes) show a little toe are a crime against nature?

  6. drrty martini

    Tsk! Dame Peggy! Shoes don’t walk on feet. No mater now thrilling and scandalous they are. Walk on feet shoe-leathers shall never do.

  7. Country Club Jihadi

    Mika thought Peggy was wearing Louboutins, recognizable by their red soles. Turned out Peggy was just standing on her prolapsed uterus.

  8. 4tehlulz

    Just cuz you can’t pounce on the ass doesn’t mean you can get all pissy, Peggy.

  9. charlesdegoal

    Fuck-me’s are OK for single women, but once they’re married, they should be kept barefoot, in the kitchen.

  10. SmutBoffin

    By Set’s smegma-encrusted scrotum, what could the shoes have looked like? Were they emblazoned with stiched leather representation of ejaculating penises or something? Did they say “suck on my toes while you jack off”?

  11. DustBowlBlues

    Mika Hardlastname is the most innocuous, empty blonde in television news. Why would her Noonington bother offending the woman, who was utterly speechless. (I’m still depressed about the cat and turned on Morning Joe because the misery of it suits me right now).

    Would have been a cute joke done privately, but a William-Buckley-speaking-style-imitating, self righteous Pope-lover shouldn’t try for snark. It just comes out mean, esp. aimed at Barbie Doll. Mika probably thought, “Are orthopedic pumps before noon the new white after Easter, Peg?” but too late to actually say anything.

  12. qwerty42

    Right now, Peggy is being sternly berated by the commenters for her op-ed in the WSJ that dares to suggest the Republicans “play grownup” about Maria-Sonia. I don’t think the Republicans can even play grownup any more.

  13. Custerwolf

    [re=327362]SmutBoffin[/re]: They gotta be cruel shoes or they’re no good in Smeggy’s eyes.

  14. Serolf Divad

    Now I’ve got this image of Noonan going down on Mika… ’cause you know that’s what Noonan was really thinking.

  15. Deepthroat

    [re=327363]DustBowlBlues[/re]: I’m with you on that. The most disgusting part of that clip was the fact that Mika APOLOGIZED. Wear your fuck-me’s with pride, dear wench!

  16. Come here a minute

    [re=327376]Serolf Divad[/re]: Dame Lady Nooningtonshire simply does not care for your scandalous implications of carpet munchery. She was clearly thinking of St. Ronnie Reagan tap-dancing in a 1940′s musical.

  17. Custerwolf

    [re=327378]Deepthroat[/re]: If only she were equally ashamed of what goes on her show.

  18. qwerty42

    [re=327399]jetjaguar[/re]: When will the grownups take over?…
    not a chance this generation. too far gone.

  19. Moleman v2.5

    I have it on good authority that the shoes looked like Clark Nova typewriters from Naked Lunch with Mika’s feet shoved into their anuses.

    At least that’s what they looked like to Peggy after she’d had her “medicine.”

  20. Naked Bunny with a Whip

    Peggy Noonan lounges around her home in plastic flip-flops. I swear it’s true.

  21. Origami

    [re=327399]jetjaguar[/re]: Don’t worry, these idiots aren’t in control of anything. Except digging up Ronald Reagan’s corpse.

  22. chascates

    The Peggy Noonan/George Will Academy of Proper Fashion may not play well beyond the Beltway.

  23. Tommmcatt

    Noonan may not be the best writer in the world, but she makes up for it by being the most constipated.

  24. WadISay

    I thought Pegs was looking pretty good today. On the Nature Channel, the V/O would be: “The female signals her receptivity to the male…”

  25. tehbenton

    This from a woman who’s dressed like one of the Aunts from The Handmaid’s Tale.

  26. Godot

    Unless they were clear platform pumps, I can’t imagine there being anything wrong with them.

  27. mrpuma2u

    [re=327362]SmutBoffin[/re]: I saw those shoes in a Chicago shoe store the other day. Patty Blagoyavich (sp?) was buying them.

  28. Mr Blifil

    Mika thrives on her fuckability quotient. She wouldn’t be the first aimless child of an extremely accomplished parent to follow such a trajectory.

  29. Custerwolf

    [re=327581]bamaboy[/re]: Oh – yeah. Fuck that. I go barefoot so I don’t lose any of the sensation.

  30. dijetlo

    Mika is going to have to show me a hell of a lot more than a pair of CFM pumps if they expect me to watch “Morning Schmoe”.

  31. Lionel Hutz Esq.

    And yet, somehow, Dame Peggy never mentions that Mika was wearing assless chaps.

Comments are closed.