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Bachmann Comix Will Feature Sexy Flying Imams, Other Things

Palin/Bachmann 2012!The crazed baby-farming, Bush-groping McCarthyite fluorescent light bulb evangelist Michele Bachmann captures the imaginations of liberals and artists alike. How, they wonder, can somebody be so nuts without very publicly nurturing an addiction to high-strength prescription meds?

Bachmann lovers will be able to indulge their obsession with a fancy new comic book, hitting the stands “soon,” and it sounds like it’s jam-packed with fun stuff:

This is that one that TELLS IT ALL — it leaves NOTHING TO THE IMAGINATION! It’s all there, the global conspiracy to end American freedom, the apocalyptic last days of human kind, the lesbians in the bathroom, the threats, the vengeance, the Bush-kissing, the sordid lies, Satan, Jesus Christ, the flying imams —

Sounds nifty!

FALSE WITNESS! The Michele Bachmann Story
A Michele Bachmann comic misadventure [Citypages]
City Pages Preview of Bill Prendergast’s Bachmann Comic book “False Witness” [Dump Bachmann]

About the author

Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

View all articles by Sara K. Smith
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  1. Blender

    If there is none of the classic ripping of the bodices, I’m not getting anywhere near it.


  2. CockedAle

    St. Cloud, MN… shit; I’m still only in St. Cloud… Every time I think I’m gonna wake up back in the jungle.
    a-BACH-a-LIPS now! Exterminate with extreme prejudice.
    The whore, her. The whore, her.

  3. Turd Way

    That drawing is great but it doesn’t capture Bachmann’s permanent lobotomy expression, which is even crazier.

  4. hobospacejunkie

    Will there be nudity? Converting of tey gheyz by her Jeffrey Jones-like husband? An incident with a crucifix & Ms. Bachmann as in The Exorcist? Indeed, does Ms. Bachmann’s mother suck cocks in hell? Is she proficient at said sucking or merely prolific? I’ll need answers to these & other questions before I even consider fapping to this book.

  5. Chickensmack

    “We are at the point, Sean, of revolution. And by that, what I mean, an orderly revolution –“

    Hmm. Any written or drawn story should have a plot exposed before the climax, and all the loose ends tied up neatly. Who better to illustrate (n.p.i.) this than a person who believes in an orderly revolution?

    “Bullets better get here before the caterer.” It’d fuck up the storyline to have all the killin’ and gore after the denouement.

  6. SayItWithWookies

    Ya gotta love her.

    Because Baby Jesus will turn you into a pillar of salt if you don’t.

  7. Chickensmack

    [re=326280]dogscantlookup[/re]: I’ve already seen this kind of novelization before, in Chick tracts.

  8. Mike Steele

    Mr. Bilfil: I’m with you. We all, secretly or not, want to have steaming, crazy sex with Michelle, while denying our values, and taping it. God help me, I would deny global warming if I could get into her panties. Ultimately, that is what is so fascinating about her batshit insanity. Same with Ann Coulter. I admit it. If there really were a hell, I would be doomed to it.

    I used to have a Fritz the Cat t-shirt.

  9. charlesdegoal

    She has a “seedy, hairy, loathsome underbelly”. Sounds like someone Ross Douthat would go for.

  10. canadians for pussy

    dont you think its time to go to here district (or what ever you call them down there)and burn down every building, salt the earth and sell those people to Sudunese slave traders.

  11. El Pinche

    Unless she’s in a Hideo Yamamoto manga, then I’m not interested.

    actually, the comic misadventure is funny.

  12. hobospacejunkie

    [re=326278]CockedAle[/re]: The whore, her (!) You are a comic genius. Unless you stole that. In which case you are merely a jew york times columnist.

  13. El Pinche

    [re=326286]Mike Steele[/re]: There’s a crazy, religious, big tittied, whore-type lady at my gym that reminds me of Bachmann. She has a tramp stamp of a crucifix with a baby jesus ….seriously. Yeah, I wouldn’t mind sprinkling some pearls on her ham.

  14. Cape Clod

    Whatever happened to the one that had Hannity and the other wankers as comic book heros, trying to find out the mystery of who killed Matt Drudge?

  15. Prommie

    La Bachman, meh, she does nothing for me. But Katherine Harris, va va va voom, sitting so erect and perky on her horse, you just know she sucks the cock fantastic, and turns cartwheels across the the floor.

  16. Brendan M.

    [re=326290]hobospacejunkie[/re]: I concur with my hobo colleague in regards to [re=326278]CockedAle[/re]. Well done, sir or madame.

  17. Canuckledragger

    In which issue will Michelle’s Lizard People Liberation Army prevail over the Dogless Commies and Islamofascists who are the librul media and the scourge of right-minded peeps everywhere? I will use my bailout monies to buy that issue, and that issue alone.

    Hey [re=326288]canadians for pussy[/re]:, your organ-ization sounds deeply interesting. Where does one sign up?

  18. Scrodd

    [re=326266]Mr Blifil[/re]: I was hoping more for Michelle Bachman meets Ron Jeremy and Max Hardcore.

  19. heuristicdevice

    [re=326328]Lets Go Vertigo[/re]: But in the post-“Crisis” continuity we still have the joy of multiple Bachmanns inexplicably raining down on Earth from the Multiverse. Plus, after the “Death of Bachmann” arc we’ll see her return with a Bon Jovi ‘do. Which is, like, comedy gold.

  20. Monsieur Grumpe

    I see little bit of R Crumb influence. Nice. She’d make a great character for a John Waters movie.

  21. widget09

    They just can’t open those FEMA camps soon enough. How in the world do you get elected when you are “out of the ballpark” crazy?????

  22. Bruno

    If there aren’t turkeys being slaughted simultaneously or live seal hearts being consumed, this comic book will be a bit second-tier

Comments are closed.