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WONKETTE BOOK CLUB

Bachmann Comix Will Feature Sexy Flying Imams, Other Things

Palin/Bachmann 2012!The crazed baby-farming, Bush-groping McCarthyite fluorescent light bulb evangelist Michele Bachmann captures the imaginations of liberals and artists alike. How, they wonder, can somebody be so nuts without very publicly nurturing an addiction to high-strength prescription meds?

Bachmann lovers will be able to indulge their obsession with a fancy new comic book, hitting the stands “soon,” and it sounds like it’s jam-packed with fun stuff:

This is that one that TELLS IT ALL — it leaves NOTHING TO THE IMAGINATION! It’s all there, the global conspiracy to end American freedom, the apocalyptic last days of human kind, the lesbians in the bathroom, the threats, the vengeance, the Bush-kissing, the sordid lies, Satan, Jesus Christ, the flying imams —

Sounds nifty!

FALSE WITNESS! The Michele Bachmann Story
A Michele Bachmann comic misadventure [Citypages]
City Pages Preview of Bill Prendergast’s Bachmann Comic book “False Witness” [Dump Bachmann]


11:59 AM on Thu May 28 2009
By Sara K. Smith
9854 Views

  1. Mr Blifil says at 12:01 pm, May 28th, 2009

    I was hoping more for Bachman meets Fritz the Cat.

  2. magic titty says at 12:02 pm, May 28th, 2009

    But will Gerard Butler play her in the movie?

  3. Blender says at 12:06 pm, May 28th, 2009

    If there is none of the classic ripping of the bodices, I’m not getting anywhere near it.

    bleh.

  4. The Sea Farmer says at 12:07 pm, May 28th, 2009

    She is a true American Hero

  5. Frampton Comes Alive says at 12:08 pm, May 28th, 2009
  6. The Sea Farmer says at 12:10 pm, May 28th, 2009

    By that, I mean a sandwich.

  7. CockedAle says at 12:11 pm, May 28th, 2009

    St. Cloud, MN… shit; I’m still only in St. Cloud… Every time I think I’m gonna wake up back in the jungle.
    a-BACH-a-LIPS now! Exterminate with extreme prejudice.
    The whore, her. The whore, her.

  8. kthxbai...also says at 12:12 pm, May 28th, 2009

    what a redundant website name: http://www.biasedliberalmedia.com/

  9. dogscantlookup says at 12:12 pm, May 28th, 2009

    hooray! The Turner Diaries in graphic novel form

  10. Turd Way says at 12:16 pm, May 28th, 2009

    That drawing is great but it doesn’t capture Bachmann’s permanent lobotomy expression, which is even crazier.

  11. hobospacejunkie says at 12:18 pm, May 28th, 2009

    Will there be nudity? Converting of tey gheyz by her Jeffrey Jones-like husband? An incident with a crucifix & Ms. Bachmann as in The Exorcist? Indeed, does Ms. Bachmann’s mother suck cocks in hell? Is she proficient at said sucking or merely prolific? I’ll need answers to these & other questions before I even consider fapping to this book.

  12. Chickensmack says at 12:18 pm, May 28th, 2009

    “We are at the point, Sean, of revolution. And by that, what I mean, an orderly revolution –”

    Hmm. Any written or drawn story should have a plot exposed before the climax, and all the loose ends tied up neatly. Who better to illustrate (n.p.i.) this than a person who believes in an orderly revolution?

    “Bullets better get here before the caterer.” It’d fuck up the storyline to have all the killin’ and gore after the denouement.

  13. SayItWithWookies says at 12:20 pm, May 28th, 2009

    Ya gotta love her.

    Because Baby Jesus will turn you into a pillar of salt if you don’t.

  14. Chickensmack says at 12:21 pm, May 28th, 2009

    dogscantlookup: I’ve already seen this kind of novelization before, in Chick tracts.

  15. Mike Steele says at 12:21 pm, May 28th, 2009

    Mr. Bilfil: I’m with you. We all, secretly or not, want to have steaming, crazy sex with Michelle, while denying our values, and taping it. God help me, I would deny global warming if I could get into her panties. Ultimately, that is what is so fascinating about her batshit insanity. Same with Ann Coulter. I admit it. If there really were a hell, I would be doomed to it.

    I used to have a Fritz the Cat t-shirt.

  16. charlesdegoal says at 12:22 pm, May 28th, 2009

    She has a “seedy, hairy, loathsome underbelly”. Sounds like someone Ross Douthat would go for.

  17. canadians for pussy says at 12:22 pm, May 28th, 2009

    dont you think its time to go to here district (or what ever you call them down there)and burn down every building, salt the earth and sell those people to Sudunese slave traders.

  18. El Pinche says at 12:22 pm, May 28th, 2009

    Unless she’s in a Hideo Yamamoto manga, then I’m not interested.

    actually, the comic misadventure is funny.

  19. hobospacejunkie says at 12:23 pm, May 28th, 2009

    CockedAle: The whore, her (!) You are a comic genius. Unless you stole that. In which case you are merely a jew york times columnist.

  20. El Pinche says at 12:28 pm, May 28th, 2009

    Mike Steele: There’s a crazy, religious, big tittied, whore-type lady at my gym that reminds me of Bachmann. She has a tramp stamp of a crucifix with a baby jesus ….seriously. Yeah, I wouldn’t mind sprinkling some pearls on her ham.

  21. Fox n Fiends says at 12:31 pm, May 28th, 2009

    I heard she that she is best friends with Kate from John & Kate plus 8

  22. Cape Clod says at 12:37 pm, May 28th, 2009

    Whatever happened to the one that had Hannity and the other wankers as comic book heros, trying to find out the mystery of who killed Matt Drudge?

  23. Bill Prendergast, You Da Man!

  24. Prommie says at 12:39 pm, May 28th, 2009

    La Bachman, meh, she does nothing for me. But Katherine Harris, va va va voom, sitting so erect and perky on her horse, you just know she sucks the cock fantastic, and turns cartwheels across the the floor.

  25. Brendan M. says at 12:47 pm, May 28th, 2009

    hobospacejunkie: I concur with my hobo colleague in regards to CockedAle. Well done, sir or madame.

  26. Canuckledragger says at 12:49 pm, May 28th, 2009

    In which issue will Michelle’s Lizard People Liberation Army prevail over the Dogless Commies and Islamofascists who are the librul media and the scourge of right-minded peeps everywhere? I will use my bailout monies to buy that issue, and that issue alone.

    Hey canadians for pussy:, your organ-ization sounds deeply interesting. Where does one sign up?

  27. Lets Go Vertigo says at 12:53 pm, May 28th, 2009

    I’m more into pre-”Crisis on Infinite Earths” Michelle Bachmann.

  28. Scrodd says at 1:05 pm, May 28th, 2009

    Mr Blifil: I was hoping more for Michelle Bachman meets Ron Jeremy and Max Hardcore.

  29. liquiddaddy says at 1:17 pm, May 28th, 2009

    Seriously, these humorless fucks can’t stand being made fun of. Keep it up.

  30. heuristicdevice says at 1:21 pm, May 28th, 2009

    Lets Go Vertigo: But in the post-”Crisis” continuity we still have the joy of multiple Bachmanns inexplicably raining down on Earth from the Multiverse. Plus, after the “Death of Bachmann” arc we’ll see her return with a Bon Jovi ‘do. Which is, like, comedy gold.

  31. Monsieur Grumpe says at 1:39 pm, May 28th, 2009

    I see little bit of R Crumb influence. Nice. She’d make a great character for a John Waters movie.

  32. Mike Steele: Well, if you really feel that way, this oldie-but-goodie will help you fap away: http://ifuckedanncoulterintheasshard.blogspot.com/?zx=43885b6b00f8add2

  33. widget09 says at 2:05 pm, May 28th, 2009

    They just can’t open those FEMA camps soon enough. How in the world do you get elected when you are “out of the ballpark” crazy?????

  34. Bruno says at 4:10 pm, May 28th, 2009

    If there aren’t turkeys being slaughted simultaneously or live seal hearts being consumed, this comic book will be a bit second-tier

  35. Accordion-o-rama says at 5:05 pm, May 28th, 2009

    The Sea Farmer: I think of her more as a taco.

  36. Dustin de Wynde says at 6:56 pm, May 28th, 2009

    CockedAle: Fucking W!N. I hate you. Please up and fucking die. A lot. Thank you.

    Monsieur Grumpe: Crumb called Twitter: http://silencedmajority.blogs.com/silenced_majority_portal/2009/05/robert-crumb-predicted-twitter.html

    Mike Steele: Felt exactly the same way about Palin. Also.

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