Wonkette
Of all the people/organizations in Washington most likely to embarrass themselves with Twitter’s power of spontaneity, those masterful enablers of the Inadvertently Hilarious at the RNC probably lead the pack. So look what they found yesterday: a word-play! Oh that Obama, that lying OBAMA, one day it’s “Constitution” this, another day “Gay Europe” that. Links to a brief YouTube clip, with no historical context. Does anyone want to learn the historical context, though? No! This isn’t Harvard or whatever the hell it’s called, the other one, Dart-Mouth.
Barack Obama, September 6, 2001: A September 6, 2001 program called “Slavery and the Constitution” on WBEZ Chicago…. Obama explained that the “fundamental flaw” [in the Constitution] was [that] “Africans at the time were not considered as part of the polity that was of concern to the framers.” In addition, the framers did not “see…it as a moral problem involving persons of moral worth.” http://apps.wbez.org/blog/?p=639
What’s he prattling on about? The RNC Twitter Machine doesn’t speak Ebonics.
Does the RNC Support Slavery? [Matt Yglesias]
Today we are all House Niggers.
The RNC is only 3/5 right.
And there goes the RNC’s one moment of self-awareness
I watched part 8 of The Civil War on PBS last night and some historian said the exact same thing about the Constitution being flawed and that it needed a war in order to truly make the US the country it intended to be. Clearly historians hate America. And Ken Burns too. Also.
TRATOR!!!!111!!!
No, Jim, Republicans are educated at Hell-mouth, not Dart-mouth.
Well — these are the people who think that the Constitution enshrines Christianity because it refers to part of the date as “the year of Our Lord.”
US out of context!!
Whatever. It’s a win for the RNC. Gore never really said “I invented the internet” either, but misquotes like this can tar you for the rest of your life.
Mr Blifil: You could also say “today we are all Michael Steele.”
AllHat: Except that Al is a pussy, unlike Hussein X, who will piss all over the RNC’s Post Toasties for playing that crap.
THE CONSTITUTION CANNOT BE FLAWED BECAUSE IT WAS WRITTEN BY JEEBUS HIMSELF! THAT IS WHY IT HAS NOT BEEN CHANGED OR AMENDED AT ALL, EVER IN HISTORY!!!!
I’m trying to think of something snarky to say in response, but this really is too much.
Then again, they do like the “originialist” theory of constitutional interpretation, and, well, the original constitution said that blacks and “Indians not taxed” counted as 3/5 of a person, so, hell, why not?
Fuck that. Here, I found a weird Republican porn painting of Abe Lincoln playing poker in Heaven with Teddy Roosevelt, Tricky Dick Nixon (who has a couple of aces up his sleeve, I think), Gerry Ford, Bush Senior, the Gipper, Bush Junior, and Ike. Why buy a tired old “dogs playing poker” painting when you could have this?
http://www.andythomas.com/detail.aspx?ID=43
This is a good thing. It shows the level of mouth breathers that the republican(fascist)party has to communicate with. While I do not hold the intelligence of the average voter in high esteem the majority are smarter than this, marginally anyway. As long as this is the group the RNC is talking to it will continue to shrink in number.
AllHat: No snark, you are absolutely right. Until he actually puts some of these weasels in jail, they will continue to spread confusion and ignorance throughout the land.
I can’t understand the holdup.
President Beeblebrox: IT BURNS MINE EYES! IT BURNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dear RNC dumbasses — we know the Constitution is flawed. We’ve numbered them.
I DON’T GOT TO SHOW YOU KNOW STINKIN’ HISTORICAL CONTEXT!
President Beeblebrox: Oh yeah RIGHT. Like all THOSE guys would be in Heaven. And by the way, when did Dubya kick the bucket, and how come NO ONE TOLD ME? Last I heard he was reading books about dog shit to schoolkids in Alienland USA, not to mention DOUBLE DITTO on the “like he would be in Heaven” thing.
President Beeblebrox: That painting looks entirely different when you realize that everyone in it is gay.
LittlePig: Gawd, I hope you’re right, but expect to hear a lot of irate AM radio pinheads screaming about Hoo-sayn Obama dissing the Constitution.
Yeah okay, Lincoln would probably be in Heaven. But not those other guys.
He just had to show off study and study our constitution that was FRAMED by our FOUNDING FATHERS and then get all uppity about it. He just had to do that, didn’t he?
President Beeblebrox: Jebus. That Andy Thomas site is frightening. I know people who hang crap like that on their living room walls…
“It’s art!”
President Beeblebrox: Yeah right. Ford would be holding Nixon’s ear while kicking his ass (hidden cards flying every which way), Ike would have decked Ronnie, and TR would be beating the everloving shit out of W.
Jeez, Republicans are retarded.
By golly BRING BACK SLAVERY. Our founding fathers demand it, and framed it that way. This will not stand. TEABAG THEM!1!
Nobama wipes his ass with the Constitution, ensuring that soon Americans will be wiping their ass with Reserve Notes and T-Bills. Down with the Democrat Socialist (Social Democrat?) Party.
President Beeblebrox: I have always wondered why T.R. is brought up at all by the repubs he was a trustbuster, how much more anti business can you get.
President Beeblebrox: Too much white men overload.
[throw-away watermelon joke]
President Beeblebrox: I like that Dubya is apparently giving St. Ronald a shoulder rub.
Obama’s just lucky that he didn’t point to the lack of women’s enfranchisement. Then Sarah Palin would have tweeted that he’s sexist, because you see the lipstick-wearing pig was her.
Sussemilch: Surely not Teddy! I heard he would pleasure no less than three stout washing-women before he took his morning’s exercise, which was hunting Irish and Polish immigrants in the newly-dedicated national parks.
President Beeblebrox: I guess Calvin Coolidge and Herbert Hoover were making a beer run.
LittlePig: Well said.
The idea that any group of people could come up with a “perfect” document that should be lived to the letter hundreds of years letter has always rubbed me the wrong way. Saying that we should all have guns because people in the 18th century needed to have guns is bizarre.
SmutBoffin: Most people called him Teddy, but at that table he was known as “The Big Stick.”
Cape Clod: In fairness, he also has a painting of Wilson, LBJ, Truman, FDR, Jimmy Carter, JFK, and Clinton playing poker in Heaven (or is it Hell?) with Andy Jackson.
I guess Jefferson was too busy banging Sally Hemings to sit for a portrait…
http://www.andythomas.com/detail.aspx?ID=42
I thought TR eventual became a Bullmouse or a RINO or something. Where is Doris Kearns Goodwin when you need her?
Sussemilch: Ha!
President Beeblebrox: Is Clinton swiping a few chips out of the pot in that one?
LittlePig: educated at the Hellmouth? I thought Buffy Summers blew that thing up.
When you understand that the “R” in RNC stands for “retarded,” it all makes sense. Otherwise, not so much.
WIDTAP: Probably plagiarizing my MA thesis.
THE CONSTUHTUSHUN IZ NOT FLAWT & SHLD NOT BE RED WITH TEH EMPATHEEZ.
President Beeblebrox: if the Bushes (Lesser and Least) are in Heaven playing poker… who the hell is that fuckin’ shit up down here? OMGZ Zombies. I knew it.
You can see the RNC’s still simmering outrage over slavery as it was an economic structure composed of cheap, non-union labor working under unregulated conditions set upon by management. Then there’s the fact it’s end was brought about by meddling East Coast elites passing a law that imposed upon the rights of business owners and the states, not to mention the edict that came after the Great War of Northern Aggression mandating that labor should get 40 acres and a mule. Let’s face it, the Reconstruction was merely Socialism under a different name and Abe Lincoln was nothing but a Commie.
Of course the Constitution is flawed, the 13th Amendment outlaws slavery, the 16th Amendment allows for a Federal income tax, the 21st Amendment ends prohibition, and finally the worst of all the amendments; #19 allows women to vote. Think of how much better U.S. Americans would be if we didn’t have those amendments.
Uppity.
Correct me if I am wrong, but wasn’t the 3/5 compromise because the south wanted to count slaves for representational purposes (but not giving them the vote, natch) and the north said F that S, and that’s why they counted them as 3/5? Sounds like Yankee fail to me LOL. Then again as a yankee I should prolly be offended at calling it flawed…
President Beeblebrox: Perhaps not entirely appropriate that Lincoln’s depiction is limited to the back of his head. As if the artist didn’t have enough face reference. Or couldn’t avoid imagining himself in the role of Booth. Or knew he wouldn’t have the fortitude of conscience to complete the painting if he had to continually encounter Lincoln’s placid stare every day. In any event that painting is an offence against God, Nature, Buttsecks, and all else that is hole-ly.
Beau Radley: You can’t blame the artist for succumbing to the urge to jump the gun a bit. Even among fundie crazees, it must be a natural inclination to wish them into the afterlife.
My caption: “Abe farted again!”
Uncle Tom Cabin Republican.
I M IN YER CONSTATOOSHUN AMENDIN YER FLAWZ!
Crank Tango: You are correct in that the 3/5’s compromise was less than ideal for all parties involved. This is why all compromise should be resoundingly rejected.
Waaaaaaaaait a minute…. Aren’t they supposed to be the “Party Of Lincoln”?
The obvious implication is that Kenyan Socialists hate the Cons-tution. The Cons-tution that makes Christianity the official religion of the US, makes English the official language and has an oath to defend the US militarily against the terr’rists.
Well there is no way the consitution is flawed on the 2nd Amendment rights, because the framers had total insight and knowledge. God bless America and God bless unlimited firepower.
flashback RNC: “This change, my friends, is being delivered in a teabag. And that’s a wonderful thing”
Can’t hear that enough, really.
problemwithcaring: Can we agree that some compromise should be rejected?