SUCKS TO BE YOU  3:21 pm May 18, 2009

by Ken Layne

Freedom Fries!SCREW YOU, MUSLIMS! The Supreme Court ruled today that Bush Administration officials cannot be sued for polices that led to 700+ Muslims in the United States being “arrested, roughed up and locked in a maximum security prison” after the 9/11 attacks. So, John Ashcroft and Robert Mueller are free to continue plotting against us. [LA Times]


Hola wonkerados.

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azw88 May 18, 2009 at 3:27 pm

Now that Muslin Barry Hussein can start persecuting Christians that get in his way! Protesters at his next college speech, no prison for you… got some good ol’ time anti-Christian treatment for you: Fed to the lions at your local zoo! (it is part of his bailout/stimulus package for zoos, free food for carnivores)

rereridiculous May 18, 2009 at 3:29 pm

Anti-Semitic white glove wearing animal with a half-black half-white face? Who likes children a little too much? What does MJ have to do with this story? Also.

memzilla May 18, 2009 at 3:30 pm

We’ve got your blanket SCOTUS decision right here.

“It should come as no surprise that a legitimate policy directing law enforcement to arrest and detain individuals because of [fill in the blank] would produce a disparate, incidental impact on [fill in the blank].”

Just fill in the blanks, microwave for 3 minutes, and out comes piping hot jurisprudence!

chascates May 18, 2009 at 3:32 pm

So I’m assuming we’re free to continue discriminating against them as well?
I’ve been shouting at anyone I see with a hat or scarf on their heads.

Scrodd May 18, 2009 at 3:33 pm

Fuck…it’s Mickey Mouse on prednisone!

charlesdegoal May 18, 2009 at 3:34 pm

[re=319464]memzilla[/re]: Win

SayItWithWookies May 18, 2009 at 3:35 pm

Ah, the Bill of Rights — our declaration of inviolable rights that the government can never take away. Unless the Attorney General gets his knickers in a twist, and then it’s all Muslims report to detention camp. Here’s a hint, guys — change your name to Exxon and incorporate before the next terrorist attack. You’ll be just fine.

Bruno May 18, 2009 at 3:39 pm

So I assume highly successful Japanese internment camp concept played some role in this decision.

By the way, can any one arrange a ‘special’ junket for Ashcroft and Mueller to Yemen or Syria? I think they could have a very entertaining visit arranged for them. Oh, and there are a few others this can be arranged for as well

Noonan May 18, 2009 at 3:40 pm

Fuck the “polices”

Crab1 May 18, 2009 at 3:42 pm

Dear Wonkette,

Thank you for taking pictures of my LSD flashback dreams.

Yours Truly,

Turd Way May 18, 2009 at 3:42 pm

Genghis Khan was born clutching a blood clot. Good thing more signs like this don’t happen or Obama would declare a War on Fetuses.

Hooray For Anything May 18, 2009 at 3:43 pm

If I would have known what I do know, I would have totally gone on a raping and pillaging spree back in 2002-2003 because I could have argued that it would have been reasonable for me to go on a raping and pillaging spree due to 9/11 and the Supreme Court would have been okay with it.

bitchincamaro May 18, 2009 at 3:46 pm

Whew. As long as there was no racial profiling going on, I guess we did the right thing, then.

This is why, on 9/12, I put my mattress right on the floor, so that Ashcroft & Co would not have to personally check for towel-headed boogiemen under the bed. I moved the porn stash, too.

TGY May 18, 2009 at 3:52 pm

No waterbailouts allowed.

Advocatus_Diaboli May 18, 2009 at 3:56 pm


Frampton Comes Alive May 18, 2009 at 3:57 pm

Today, we are all Hamas mouse….

charlesdegoal May 18, 2009 at 3:58 pm

Roberts’ rules of (law and) order

Advocatus_Diaboli May 18, 2009 at 4:02 pm

[re=319511]Advocatus_Diaboli[/re]: Oops, I should have noted that I was quoting the concurring opinion of Justice Thomas.

Gopherit May 18, 2009 at 4:33 pm

Um, how about the 60 or so that were killed during interrogations….can their families sue?

OrangeAlert May 18, 2009 at 4:40 pm

Scalia: “Look, Islam isn’t a race so this obviously isn’t racist. So shut your whining towelhead mouths.”

Thomas: “If this was racist, I’d obviously have a problem with it since I’ve been told I’m black. Also – what Joe Pesci there just said.”

Roberts: “We didn’t waterboard them to death and THIS is the thanks we get? The nerve of some people.”

Country Club Jihadi May 18, 2009 at 5:34 pm

[re=319469]Scrodd[/re]: OMG my mom is on that shit. You are so right.

hobospacejunkie May 18, 2009 at 5:57 pm

When’s the next time the SCOTUS all fly on a plane together? And can we alert the guy who made Wellstone’s crash look like an accident? Tell him we’ll triple any offers he gets. I smell court packing!

nader paul kucinich gravel May 18, 2009 at 9:26 pm

The Court will be stacked just in time for the ‘troubles’ to start.

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