We mentioned earlier that we saw staunch “Reagan Conservative” and National Review marm Kathryn Jean Lopez at a pre-WHCD cocktail party, where she looked uncomfortable, what with all the homosexuals sipping the Devil’s Vinegar and all. Unlike your Wonkette, however, K-Lo stayed for the dinner portion, where she saw the various blacks make 9/11 jokes to an appreciative liberal media audience all cackling like sadists and jumping on tables left and right to perform partial-birth abortions and play frisbee with the bloody mutilated fetuses while sucking each others’ gay-married cocks and pooping on pictures of Ronald Reagan and the Pope before injecting white children with the AIDS cancer and science juice.
Now don’t get too libtard apologisty, people, okay, because Wanda Sykes’ jokes about wanting to kill drug-addicted terrorist Rush Limbaugh with kidney failure were over-the-top for the dinner, and not even funny, or original, or purposeful in any way. The lefty Internet has been responding to her critics with the same line today that, “Well, hello, Rush Limbaugh has made far more vulgar jokes,” which is true, but he isn’t speaking at the White House Correspondents Dinner in front of the president on national teevee. Wanda Sykes can take some criticism, but not much, because who wants to talk about “Wanda Sykes” for much longer?
BUT STILL, K-Lo is insane. She hates Barack Obama! (Ha ha your associate editor has not seen any of his speech — did he joke about throwing his kids into the World Trade Center or something?)
But even the children were not left out of the jokes. President Obama used his daughters to make light of Air Force One’s Lower Manhattan flyover. Before Saturday night, there was no better visual symbol of this administration’s September 10 policy blindness. Air Force One might as well have been flying a banner that read “We Don’t Get It.” Obama’s joke about the incident could be considered the banner.
[...]
But Sykes wasn’t the core problem, as tasteless and awful as her jokes were. I keep going back to Sasha and Malia. The president used his daughters, two days after he let one of his staff take the fall for his administration’s use of everyone in Lower Manhattan and along the Hudson River on a clear morning as a prop in the Obama show. Nearly 3,000 Americans were murdered on a day not unlike that one, and his administration needlessly freaked out those who witnessed it. And he’s laughing.
[...]
Somehow Dick Cheney, who continues to stand athwart unseriousness yelling “Stop,” is the enemy. Somehow Rush Limbaugh, conservative stalwart, the embodiment of capitalist success, a man who has struggled with adversity with an inspiring humility, is someone we’re to disdain so much as to laugh at the prospect of his kidneys’ failing. Somehow we are supposed to be pining for one of the nastiest men on television to do something that everyone laughing at the joke presumably considers torture to Sean Hannity, who, agree with him or not, is the happiest of warriors compared with Keith Olbermann.
When the Air Force did its terrible flight test over New York, our headline was “Obama Attacks Statue of Liberty.” K-Lo seems to think that this was true, and can’t understand why America would blame Dick Cheney when it was *Barack Obama* who flew his plane into New York buildings, again.
And on Saturday night, Barack Obama farted on 9/11.
No Laughing Matter [National Review via TNR]
{ 164 comments }
Rush Limbaugh’s humility is inspiring all right. Me. To laugh.
Why do these people keep saying “athwart”? It’s not even a word.
Wait, what was that about Rush Limbaugh’s “inspiring humility”?
Unlike your Wonkette, however, K-Lo stayed for the dinner portion, where she saw the various blacks make 9/11 jokes to an appreciative liberal media audience all cackling like sadists and jumping on tables left and right to perform partial-birth abortions and play frisbee with the bloody mutilated fetuses while sucking each others’ gay-married cocks and pooping on pictures of Ronald Reagan and the Pope before injecting white children with the AIDS cancer and science juice.
Sounds like a normal Friday in Greenwich Village.
[re=313721]boatapple[/re]: Maybe they have lisps and can’t pronounce their S sounds correctly.
Ugh… I hate it when they use Christian code-words like “happiest of warriors” to describe thugs like Sean Hannity. There is nothing Christ-like or happy-warrior-like about Hannity.
So, if I understand K-Lo’s rant, she would be OK with everything if Obama would just waterboard his daughters in a show of post-9/11 thinking?
Too bad there isn’t a little brain burrowing creature like Khan put in Lt. Chekov with K-Lo’s name on it that carried a sense of humor to the recipient.
She was there and there STILL were that many cupcakes left over? I’ll bet she took home a doggie bag. In the back of a U Haul.
God, I hope she dies in a fire.
OH AND BIG NEWS. I am moving (back) to DC. Also.
I might have some sympathy for her argument if she had ever written the following:
Somehow Larry Flynt, liberal stalwart, the embodiment of capitalist success, a man who has struggled with adversity with an inspiring humility, is someone we’re to disdain so much as to laugh at the prospect of his kidneys’ failing.
And we all remember the humility Rush showed when he dealt with Michael J. Fox’s adversity.
I never saw her picture before. Isn’t she that actress who did that “come into the light” scene from Poltergiest? Does she have the bitters because there aren’t a lot of hollywood parts for 4 foot tall portly women? I can sorta understand. Me, I love a woman with a crusty exterior. They almost always have a creamy center.
[re=313721]boatapple[/re]: Buckley used “athwart”. Maybe it is part of some mystical right-wing chant.
[re=313727]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Here’s a preview of the 2012 campaign -
WHY HASN’T NOOBAMA DENOUNCED AND/OR REJECTED HIS EXTREMIST DAUGHTERS YET?
[re=313721]boatapple[/re]: ahoy, matey! ’tis indeedy one of those word things, from starboard clear across your stem to port. argh! also.
The ghoul Cheney is serious like a, well, like the illegal assassination squad he commanded. I’ll grant her that.
Next time you have a K-lo story can you please use that bloody steak photo instead of her before picture?
Maybe Wanda Sykes was acting mean in a joking manner to make fun of people who make meanness their day-to-day business?
Hope that’s not too libtard apologisty, Jim! I liked your duck picture!
Last time I stood “athwart unseriousnes” it craned its head up and gave me a blowjob. No doubt Cheney’s hoping he too will get lucky.
“Staunch” – is that the combined form of “Stinky McHugebelly?”
It could have been worse; he could have made fun of the lack of WMDs in Iraq or something.
That would be totally beyond the pale.
She’s just upset that the cupcakes weren’t served with ranch dressing.
K-Lo and her athwarts just love them some New York City. But not enough to give the city proper funding to protect itself. Maybe if they’d get rid of the brown people and the gays and everyone would speak ENGLISH …
Missed opportunities to joke about having Cheney’s pacemaker operated by “The Clapper.”
[re=313722]magic titty[/re]: humility is code for ass-sweat-production-capabilities
[re=313746]4tehlulz[/re]: That’s what I was waiting for! Nobody died for Air Force One’s photoshoot.
[re=313723]jagorev[/re]: ninth circle represent (I know dating myself)
[re=313745]Custerwolf[/re]: I thought staunch meant to stop the flow of liquid, like the blood pouring from the bloody corpse of the republican party. Also, too bad K-Lo is afflicted with that disease which seems to have gone epidemic: the inability to remember the last eight years.
What a dumb fat stupid bitch. I know, I’m a terrible person. I’m tired and too lazy to think of something funny.
[re=313757]x111e7thst[/re]: Jesus. The Ninth Circle was a legend when I was living in NYC, and that was about ten years ago.
Um, I respect you as an elder.
K-Lo dials the anger knob up to 11. 9-11, 9-11, 9-11.
[re=313727]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Yeh, that should fix everything.
Why would K-lo be there? She’s not a White House correspondent. She’s not a dazzling celebrity like Todd Palin. So WTF? I might as well go. In fact I was going to, but Meghan couldn’t get me the ticket she said she would.
[re=313750]allainjules[/re]: Aside from the projectile-diarrhea image a while back, your blog has been all but incomprehensible to prole such as myself, who does not speak le French. But thanks anyway!
[re=313723]jagorev[/re]: Maybe fifty years ago. These days a normal night in Greenwich village involves cupcakes at Magnolia Bakery and a $1500 bag from Marc Jacobs, haven’t you heard?
[re=313721]boatapple[/re]: “Athwart” is that thing that Rush had in his buttcrack that kept him out of the military.
“Rush Limbaugh, conservative stalwart,”
I had stalwarts once, and they were painful.
[re=313749]Tommmcatt[/re]: She’s just upset that the cupcakes weren’t served with ranch dressing.
Ha ha, yes! Also, gross. Also.
i think she was upset because they ran out of chicken wings and coke zero.
“.. a war not of our choosing” DAMNED SKIPPY!
Seriously, that SOB Saddam Hussein and his imaginary WMD just FORCED W to attack! In fact, he telepathically double-dog dared W to invade. And W didn’t want to look like a pussy in front of all his neocon buddies, so he HAD to do it. You don’t ignore that double-dog dare!
[re=313749]Tommmcatt[/re]: Or Baconnaise.
This woman has the most twisted logic I’ve ever heard. Somehow she connects Obama’s joke about his two daughers (which I thought very cute) to 9/11 because both involved New York, and the flyover was on a clear day, and 9/11 happened on a clear day, so… you cannot make jokes about planes, kids, or sunny days anymore, people. It is insensitive.
Wonderful! I love seeing ‘athwart’ used in the same sentence with ‘Dick Cheney’.
I had no idea J-Lo had a lispth..
[re=313760]Tommmcatt[/re]: Ninth Circle as in Dante? Isn’t that reserved for freakishy lumpen, hypocritard amnesic flakebot bloggers? And those unwilling to share cupcakes with the most gentlest, friendliest of web-footed creatures?
Maybe that was BHO’s plan all along… Her, Glenn Beck, et al have such a horrible time that next year all neo-con boycott the event. Then the orgy can commence without the fear that someone won’t try to buttsecks a pre-teen boy on the dais.
…however, K-Lo stayed for the dinner portion…
Shit, she takes on a man-sized portion from the Heart Attack drive thru with a diet coke, thank you very much.
Is Wanda out yet? I surprised the Reight-Wingers haven’t doubled-up on the “Blacks hate da gays”. Also.
[re=313774]anabellum[/re]: not that it matters…but i did of course mean K-Lo..
time to go back to drinking beer hon..
[re=313773]BlueStateLibtard[/re]:
Ya notice how a dude left his post (i.e. fired) over this ’cause maybe it kinda looked like 9/11 but who, besides Bill Maher, was fired from their fucking job over the, uh, REAL 9/11…
[re=313760]Tommmcatt[/re]: just a faggy little leather boy with a smaller piece of stick.
[re=313721]boatapple[/re]: Your comment reflects pre-9/11 grammar.
Using daughters as political prop–Bad
Using daughter’s illegitimate Down’s syndrome baby as political prop–Good
[re=313753]Hominidx[/re]: Funny! Clap off!!
[re=313722]magic titty[/re]: You know… that time he… oh, humility. I thought it was something about being humiliated.
[re=313753]Hominidx[/re]: Funnier. Clap on, clap off, clap on, clap off….
She looks like that actress on the old MAD TV show. Help! Who am I thinking of??
Any more wonder left about why teh conservatives all think Colbert is a serious talking head?
lego jebus, that was some serving of stupid there, JLo.
I think it would be funny if K-Lo’s speen failed. Ha! Spleen.
No, wait, it would be even better if her pancreas just totally spazzed out and died. Right in her abdomen (not that anyone could find it, or would even care to look.)
No, better, check this – a massive coronary failure of the eppiglotis, with a arthero-ventral fistula in her sacariliac, compounded by a rupture of the sciatic nerve, yeah.
Pretty much any one of those on her would be a laff-riot for us, I think. Or a big massive puss-oozing inflammation of her brain cavity. Anything, really.
[re=313784]MGBYG[/re]: So true. There is much evidence that plenty of people screwed up and weren’t doing their jobs, and those doing their jobs were ignored. But the truth about it will keep being rewritten. Today on Morning Idiot Joe, some idiot said Cheney had “kept us safe” from Al Queda for EIGHT years.
speen = spleen, you know what I mean
[re=313800]proudgrampa[/re]: Alex Borstein, if Alex ate a pregnant heifer.
Is it possible she just can’t tell what’s funny?
this is the first thing of hers i’ve read. what a twisted nasty little heap of shit. how on earth does she manage simple daily life? anyone this delusional must have trouble dressing themselves.
[re=313746]4tehlulz[/re]: Or a woman facing the death penalty in Texas.
And we thought David Foster Wallace was kidding with “President Limbaugh.”
[re=313805]BlueStateLibtard[/re]: Do they realize that 9-11 happened on the ChimpCheney watch? Or do they think there was there a time warp when no one was in charge. It’s more like, they kept us safe – except for when they didn’t.
I also kept us safe by blowing a ram’s horn at the rising sun every morning. It was as effective as anything they did.
You’re welcome.
[re=313808]Custerwolf[/re]: Thanks! That was driving me crazy…
Still too soon for 9/11 jokes?
[re=313808]Custerwolf[/re]: Oh, and win also on the pregnant heifer reference.
[re=313816]proudgrampa[/re]: You’re welcome.
I vow to laugh only when Limpballs has a major heart attack while he is in the Dominican Republic.
Kidney failure is just not all that funny, too long and drawn out.
“Kidneys’ failing??” As in the kidneys own the failure?
And she stayed for the dinner portion? She IS the dinner portion, har!
[re=313775]snideinplainsight[/re]: gay bar in manhattan. There were some similarities to the ninth of divina comedia fame. everyone was always willing to share their cupcakes and ‘ludes with the webfeet tho.
[re=313815]Joshua Norton[/re]: Ms. J-Lo or whatever’s she called, also has selective memory herself. She forgets the utterly offensive spectacle of the Chimp-in-Chief making a joke about looking for WMD under tablecloths at another White House Correspondents Dinner. Yes, I’m sure if you were a parent of a soldier killed in Iraq that must have been just hilarious. But at least I can still laugh WITH people (Obama was damn funny) and laugh AT them (k-lo)
[re=313732]StephanieInCA[/re]: SAME HERE! Ah metropolitan areas whose public transportation doesn’t have the last train leave at 12 am every night.
[re=313823]pedestrian rage[/re]: She wandered from table to table asking “are you going to finish that”? and “Can I have your desert”?
Good times.
I didn’t hate her as much until I found out, just now, that she resembles a gluttonous sloth.
It’s K-Lo the Hutt!
[re=313741]Custerwolf[/re]: “Next time you have a K-lo story can you please use that bloody steak photo instead of her before picture?”
Three words:
Pot.
Calling.
Kettle.
Black.
Okay, four words . . . .
Mooo!
And “athwart” is the sound of overly large upper thighs rubbing their pantsuits legs together.
I’ll leave you to guess whose.
Mooo!
Rush is a humble man, like Jesus.
[re=313813]Holding Out for a Hero[/re]: That one was HI-larious, too. Ah, lethal injection. Good times. Good times.
Well, at least this got her mind off the porn flooding her inbox, for a few minutes anyway.
[re=313836]Neilist[/re]: Oh darling, there you are sneaking in through my back door again.
Skank, skank, skank, skank, skank, skank, skank, skank, skank.
She was the obnoxious ‘heavy’ chick who always had to make her point in social science classes in high school and even the teachers rolled their eyes but had to let her talk.
“The president used his daughters, two days after he let one of his staff take the fall for his administration’s use of everyone in Lower Manhattan and along the Hudson River on a clear morning as a prop in the Obama show.”
I keep reading this over and over and it STILL doesn’t make any sense. Wait… Lopez, Lopez… does anyone here read Spanish?
[re=313841]Custerwolf[/re]:
You have your own private troll? How cool!
[re=313721]boatapple[/re]:
From the Free Online Dictionary:
a·thwart (-thwôrt)
adv.
1. From side to side; crosswise or transversely.
2. So as to thwart, obstruct, or oppose; perversely.
prep.
1. From one side to the other of; across: “the Stars that shoot athwart the Night” Alexander Pope.
2. Contrary to; against.
3. Nautical Across the course, line, or length of.
I’m guessing the GOP ascribe to adverb definition two. Perverse being their ideology. Or, they could just be worshiping Rush’s ass boil again. Also.
[re=313721]boatapple[/re]:
From the Free Online Dictionary:
a·thwart (-thwôrt)
adv.
1. From side to side; crosswise or transversely.
2. So as to thwart, obstruct, or oppose; perversely.
prep.
1. From one side to the other of; across: “the Stars that shoot athwart the Night” Alexander Pope.
2. Contrary to; against.
3. Nautical Across the course, line, or length of.
I’m guessing the GOP ascribe to adverb definition two. Perverse being their ideology. Or, they could just be worshiping Rush’s ass boil again. Also.[re=313726]jagorev[/re]:
Wait, I’m confused. Isn’t K-Lo supposed to be one of the “smart” conservatives?
[re=313732]StephanieInCA[/re]: Dammit, now there are only 4,754,821 hot girls in California. But seriously, enjoy the lack of sunshine out there!
[re=313726]jagorev[/re]: “Ugh… I hate it when they use Christian code-words like “happiest of warriors” to describe thugs like Sean Hannity.”
How else do you describe closeted right wingers?
[re=313846]Tommmcatt[/re]: Yeah, it’s peachy, but I’m going to have to get him a zoning variance if he insists upon taking up so much real estate per comment.
I think it’s time for K Lo to go to YouTube and watch this video.
Unlike your Wonkette, however, K-Lo stayed for the dinner portion, where she saw the various blacks make 9/11 jokes to an appreciative liberal media audience all cackling like sadists and jumping on tables left and right to perform partial-birth abortions and play frisbee with the bloody mutilated fetuses while sucking each others’ gay-married cocks and pooping on pictures of Ronald Reagan and the Pope before injecting white children with the AIDS cancer and science juice.
Didn’t you just totally lift that passage from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas? I distinctly remember that was the scene where K-Lo J. Thompson and J-Go Lazlo are tripping their asses off at the hotel bar, right?
She’s the fat chick that not even gay guys want to dance with. That’s why she’s got such a bad case of the bitterz.
I was still laughing this afternoon at Wanda’s kidney fail joke. I know it was cheap, but . . . fuck, that was a funny thing.
The duck was also funny. I love a good duck joke.
When I thwart it can get kind of staunchy too.
[re=313842]chascates[/re]: Heavy?? HEAVY??!!? Let’s not mince words here: She’s a porker.
[re=313865]19kevin8[/re]:
She’s so fat her ass gives new meaning to the words “Back Acre”.
I know its been said before, but no one in all of NY thought it might have been another miracle landing in the Hudson? God Bless that Pilot and God Bless America.
I was also personally offended by that photo of Barry meeting with the WHITE Pirate with NO PRECONDITIONS.
Wanda Sykes was not actually even trying to be funny. She was simply expressing her anger at conservatives and the press in the most thinly veiled manner possible. Obama’s joke about Boehner was far more expressionistic and weird, if you ask me, so so much for the “in front of the President” argument.
THE PREZIDENTAL FLYBY WAS A PRACICE RUN FOR THE NEXT INSITE JOB SHEEPLEEES!!11!
[re=313865]19kevin8[/re]: You’re spot on. I was trying to be more respectful to any of our ‘space challenged’ readers. The thought of her & Jonah Goldberg naked should serve as a diet inducement for anyone, anywhere.
[re=313865]19kevin8[/re]:
She’s so fat she can store pool cues in her cleavage.
[re=313815]Joshua Norton[/re]: Bless you and that Ram’s Horn. Keep blowing hard.
If we hadn’t canceled the F-22 fighter jet program, Air Force One would have never been allowed to approach NYC. Why does Barak Hussein Obama hate the F-22 programe?
[re=313865]19kevin8[/re]:
She’s so fat her tramp stamp is a map of the New York City transit system.
[re=313880]Bruno[/re]: I know its been said before, but no one in all of NY thought it might have been another miracle landing in the Hudson?
Yeah, buncha drama queens!
K-Lo, just another fresh faced agent of change from the Grand Old Party!
http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/
[re=313865]19kevin8[/re]: She’s so fat she requires two midgets and a scaffold to take a pee.
Kudos, Jim. The run on sentence beginning with “Unlike your Wonkette…” is one of the funniest combinations of snark and classic gonzo I’ve seen in a very long time.
Katherine Jean Lopez is so fat she is the sole inspiration for the double-z cup.
[re=313909]Tommmcatt[/re]: You’re only calling it as it is.
[re=313914]19kevin8[/re]:
The truth hurts, baby.
[re=313882]Mr Blifil[/re]: Sorry, that’s BS. She spent the first half ribbing the Obamas. The Limbaugh kidney joke may well show some personal animosity, and while she didn’t kill overall she got half a dozen good ones off. A-minus to B-plus.
This is great publicity for her upcoming talk show this fall.
http://www.prospect.org/csnc/blogs/tapped_archive?month=05&year=2009&base_name=wanda_sykes_offensive_routine#115047:
“She joked that Limbaugh was a racist who doesn’t want black people to “escap[e] the underclass.” She accused him of being responsible for killing “a million babies a year,” and aired her friend’s theory that Limbaugh himself was a terrorist attack,” a followup to 9/11. She also, most disgustingly, said that if conservatives kept apologizing to Limbaugh, they’d eventually contract “anal poisoning.” She wondered when Republicans would finally stop “bending over and grabbing their ankles” for Limbaugh, and finally concluded that Limbaugh was just a “bad guy.”
Oh wait. Wanda Sykes didn’t say any of these things. These are things Rush Limbaugh has said about Obama or other Democrats in the past year, the kind of statements few reporters found offensive enough to write about, despite the fact that most of them were said with the utmost seriousness. And while Sykes is a mere comedian whose influence on the Democratic Party is negligible, Limbaugh’s influence in the party is so great that Republican leaders can’t even criticize him without having to issue apologies after the fact.”
[re=313931]chascates[/re]:
Rush Limbaugh is so fat…
All snark aside, the terrorists win when you’re afraid. K-Lo and Rushbo are like Osama Bin Ladens wet dream, passing airplanes terrify them. If their actually was an existential threat to the US, they’d be catatonic in the fetal positions under their beds.
[re=313935]Tommmcatt[/re]: …that he pays a Dominican male prostitute to wipe his ass?
[re=313939]chascates[/re]:
…that the last time he wiped his ass a Dominican male prostitute fell out!
I’ll gladly take a president whose most glaring “September 10 mindset” was flying a plane around NY without telling people, as oppose to the last administration’s “September 10 mindset” of invading an (arbitrarily-determined) nation-state to combat an enemy that isn’t created by borders and can expand internationally based on perceived-to-be threatening U.S. policy.
Even on nerdprom night virginity chose her. BUT…she has distinction as the worst. writer. on. the. internet.
[re=313806]snideinplainsight[/re]: No, I think that you were right the first time, you must mean “speen.” The Spleen was Paul Rubens’ character in “Mystery Men”. And he’s waaay to classy to fail anywhere near that K-Lo creature.
[re=313726]jagorev[/re]: [re=313851]eclecticbrotha[/re]: The “Happy Warrior” was of course Hubert Humphrey, so named during his 16-year fight to get civil rights legislation through Congress. I’m not sure how exactly Sean Hannity is like him, but perhaps Lyndon Johnson has Hannity’s pecker in his pocket, too.
I haven’t even read what’s after the link. Damn, Jim, that was the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever read.
You’d think Rush would be big enough to die for his cause.
Cause hes such a fat fuck.
[re=313741]Custerwolf[/re]: When I saw this post I swear K-Lo’s hand was reaching out to grasp that steak. Or maybe it was the drugs.
[re=313931]chascates[/re]: Awesome find = super WIN
[re=313956]Blue Gal[/re]: Spoken like someone who hasn’t sampled Chuck Norris’ oeuvre at WorldNetDaily.
http://www.worldnetdaily.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.search&keywords=%22chuck+norris%22
she last had an orgasm in 1993 when she accidently sat on a midget.
[re=313882]Mr Blifil[/re]: The fake tan joke was a great way to both include Boehner in a bipartisan way (“person of color”) and then point out an obvious freaky side he has. The whole routine was well done, kudos to the writers.
Spot on! over the top in both directions and in directions most of us haven’t even imagined yet with a glorious sploosh!
[re=313836]Neilist[/re]: OMG dude you are fucking hilarious. I swear to god your fat jokes are so funny I wish I was as smart as you when I was in seventh grade making random fat jokes at girls I secretly liked but didn’t like me back.
Zing, sir, Zing!
She’s just made because she’s ugly.
[re=313778]MGBYG[/re]: I have some information on her favorite recipe: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bacon_Explosion
[re=313920]qaf[/re]: I didn’t say she wasn’t trying to be funny THROUGHOUT HER ACT, I only refer to the so-called “controversial” lines that caused Pat Buchanan to worry so much, he had to schedule his massage with happy ending an hour earlier than usual, just so it wouldn’t be gnawing at him all day.
[re=313994]TexasCowGirl[/re]: Here ‘e’ – I think you accidentally left this back at your last comment.
The only time I really liked Wanda Sykes was when she was doing the voice for a CG skunk, which was confusing as hell for me but I try not to think about it anymore.
Also, what’s K-Lo talkin’ ’bout, with them Obamas not getting 9/11? Conservatives get it, I guess. Well, they get that it’s a great political tool to wave around and get a Pavlovian response from the mouth breathers, who then have to be monitored closely for several minutes to make sure they don’t choke on their own saliva because they’re stupid.
I think it would be funny if someone nailed KLo’s flabby mammaries to a board, tied a rope to the board and to the bumper of a pickup truck, then dragged her around on gravel roads until what was left of her resembled a bloody throw rug.
That would be funny.
Plus it would improve her appearance and increase the likelihood that she might trick a man into secksing her.
I laughed so sincerely at Wanda Sykes’ jokes that my kidneys failed.
Or, perhaps it was my bladder.
[re=314008]KittyLitter[/re]: Wow. That, uh…that should, you know, uh, win some kind of prize. Not sure for what or what kind of institution (hint) might award the prize, but a win’s a win, right? There must be some amazing things going on inside your head. Please do not hesitate to share them in the future. As they say, I find your ideas intriguing and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Yes Rush Limbaugh didn’t talk in from of the president on national teeveee, but he did talk at that big GOP convention that was aired on national teevee. He’s basically the leader of the republican party. I don’t think Wanda was over the top. That being said, the Hannity joke was funnier.
Can some sympathetic liberal take KLO aside and apply the tweezer. Tweezers are not just for Susan Boyle.
[re=313726]jagorev[/re]: Thank you for decoding that. I read that fucking sentence 3 times and had no earthly idea what she was talking about. Bitch is conservative with everything, I guess. Even commas.
[re=313745]Custerwolf[/re]: If I stand athwart you, will you staunch me?
So if a joke about Rush Limpballs suffering kidney failure is wrong, is it more or less wrong to make a joke about K-Load experiencing a freak accident involving a truckload of Strunk & White’s Elements of Style?
Oh wait … I don’t care.
I am disturbed by how much insight I just got into K-Lo’s relationships with “men.” Please don’t ever post something this sexual again.
I hope K – Lo isn’t ashamed of using her “love language”… which is Evangelical for “speaking in tongues”… which I assume means caressing my righteous sack with her cheetoh – stained tongue.
Even Fundie Fatties need lovin’.
“…two days after he let one of his staff take the fall for his administration’s use of everyone in Lower Manhattan and along the Hudson River on a clear morning as a prop in the Obama show.”
K-Lo seems honestly disappointed that Barack Hussein Obama did not do the honorable thing and immediately resign/commit seppuku. It’s just not fair that life consistently fails to measure up to her daydreams.
And on a clear morning, people! On a CLEAR MORNING! The bastard! He deliberately engineered it to ruin one of the few nice days this spring!
[re=314008]KittyLitter[/re]: The fuck is wrong with you people? Readers, please note that this is the sort of commentary that will get you banned.
“[Rush Limbaugh] who has struggled with adversity with an inspiring humility.”
Oh fuck you. He’s a third-rate drug addict. The end.
They sure do a lot of standing athwart.
She really is the worst propagandist in the history of the western world.
Goebbels would have nothing on this obese, ugly, deluded revisionist hag of a hack.
By the way, did I say ugly?
I did? OK, I’ll say it again. Ugly. Both outside and inside.
“K-Lo stayed for the dinner portion.” Gee, I never saw that coming.
[re=313721]boatapple[/re]:
a·thwart (ə-thwôrt’)
adv.
From side to side; crosswise or transversely.
So as to thwart, obstruct, or oppose; perversely.
prep.
From one side to the other of; across: “the Stars that shoot athwart the Night” (Alexander Pope).
Contrary to; against.
Nautical. Across the course, line, or length of.
[Middle English : a-, on; see a–2 + thwert, across; see thwart.]
[re=313721]boatapple[/re]: Personalize
Dictionary | WordNet | Mentioned In
a·thwart (ə-thwôrt’)
adv.
From side to side; crosswise or transversely.
So as to thwart, obstruct, or oppose; perversely.
prep.
From one side to the other of; across: “the Stars that shoot athwart the Night” (Alexander Pope).
Contrary to; against.
Nautical. Across the course, line, or length of.
[Middle English : a-, on; see a–2 + thwert, across; see thwart.]
[re=314036]Boojum[/re]: Only if you can remember our safe word.
Don’t Wanda Sykes and K-Lo date each other, and aren’t they living together?
Awww, K-Lo just doesn’t like jokes.
That’s understandable, considering the biggest joke in America these days is the “conservative movement.”
Hell, I’ve got bigger movements I haven’t bothered to flush yet.
[re=313773]BlueStateLibtard[/re]: K-Lo is so PC.
That is pork chops right?
[re=313836]Neilist[/re]: Are you a chubby chaser? You sure are obsessed with the weight of women that you don’t even see.
We see K-Lo and that has got to be stopped.
a•thwart (ə-thwôrt’)
A pimple or carbuncle on the buttocks. This type of abthess is often caused by exthessive epithtemic political rhetoric.
[re=313800]proudgrampa[/re]: Lowered expecta-ations…
It’s okay – K-Lo was also vaguely troubled by the lack of seriousness at the Cheney Beerbust for Torure charity event.
[re=313882]Mr Blifil[/re]: Right. Wanda’s Sykes is hardly ever funny and she was funniest she has ever been that night and funnier still at the moment you described – exactly when she was least trying to be.
The “I don’t need to see your nipples” quote was hilarious mainly because you could tell, she meant it.
[re=314210]thefrontpage[/re]: K-Lo is a really big piece a white meat, but it’s not serious.
I know I’m just a dumb, knuckle-dragging, mouth-breathing Iraq veteran, so what do I know, but I think Barack Hussein Obama should take a page out of President-God George Walker Jesus Bush’s Comedy for Correspondents Dinners Book:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/3570845.stm
Now that’s some funny shit.
I heard she was mad ’cause she only got one dessert.
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