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American Taliban.Texas GOP clown Pete Sessions last made the news when he suggested the doomed Republicans become more like the Taliban. As the modern Republican is already a fundamentalist nut who buggers little boys, hates science, fears women and constantly fantasizes about being killed for/by God, the only thing left was for the remaining wingnuts to move into caves, with their tea bags and their goats. And this may well have happened, as only 21% of Americans reachable by telephone now admit to being Republican. Anyway, now Pete Sessions is saying Obama is intentionally (and magically) causing both unemployment and a decline in the stock markets. True, maybe?!

Sessions told The New York Times that the administration intends to “diminish employment and diminish stock prices” as part of a “divide and conquer” strategy.

And he asserted that the Obama agenda is “intended to inflict damage and hardship on the free enterprise system, if not to kill it.”

Please note that Sessions is not just another mouth-breathing brain-damaged-at-birth congressman from Dallas who loves to hear himself say weird things — Pete Sessions is the mouth-breathing brain-damaged-at-birth congressman from Dallas who loves to hear himself say weird things who is also chairman of the National Republican Congressional Committee. You know, the people charged with defending and winning House seats for the GOP.

It’s a great premise, of course: Nobama is personally causing millions of people to lose their jobs, through the witchcraft known as “The Lagging Indicator” and the Time Machine known as “job loss has been steadily increasing for 16 straight months now,” otherwise known as the “First 100 Days.” By demonically taking away the livelihood of working Americans, “The One” will …. somehow …. OKAY WHAT IN THE FUCK POSSIBLE POLITICAL BENEFIT COULD COME FROM MAKING MILLIONS OF VOTERS JOBLESS? HELP US OUT, PETE.

Let’s move on, to the next premise of this Conspiracy: The Obama Administration is also, concurrently, engaged in a sinister decline in stock prices. This will …. oh never mind, who even knows. The only problem with Al Barack Hussein’s “dark” magic against the stock market is that the S&P 500 is at a four-month high, even with today’s 1.6% drop.

And this is how Nobama creates his Socialist Dictatorship.

Rep. Pete Sessions accuses Obama of deliberately driving stock market down [Dallas News]

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