CENSORSHIP  12:46 pm April 30, 2009

RNC Pulls Comical Web Ad About ACORN And Bill Ayers And TeLePrOMpTerz

by Jim Newell

Call it the Road to Recovery, you queer fink motherfuckers: a web ad from the RNC, to commemorate Obama’s 100 days of Famine, posted yesterday and immediately pulled for being terrible. Watch what appears to be a Southern white man doing his “blacky voice” over video of Obama’s inauguration speech.

The introductory text reads, “100 days ago, a man read a grand speech from a TelePrompter. What if the Teleprompter had accidentally switched to reality-mode?” Then: “A parody from the RNC.” OH JESUS, RUN.

Apparently an “edited version” will come out later today, so that will probably just be a sweaty Haley Barbour or whatever yelling “n***er” for three minutes.

[YouTube, HuffPo]

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Lascauxcaveman April 30, 2009 at 12:50 pm

Heh. Everytime I try to imagine our last president giving a speech w/o the TelePrompTerz … just to comically bad to imagine.

Min April 30, 2009 at 12:50 pm

Explain to me again how these people won and kept the White House for 8 years.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 12:50 pm

Jesus fuck. Their target audience seems apparent given the 45 minutes they allowed for reading the intro.

Advocatus_Diaboli April 30, 2009 at 12:51 pm

Couldn’t make it 45 seconds. The stupid hurt too much.

V572625694 April 30, 2009 at 12:52 pm

What’d they record it on, a cell phone?

slappypaddy April 30, 2009 at 12:53 pm

Poor Goppers. People with no sense of humor who don’t have the sense to stop engaging in nonsense.

forgracie April 30, 2009 at 12:54 pm

License plate Jesus approves of this ad….

binarian April 30, 2009 at 12:55 pm

The whole teleprompter thing just drives home the point that they….have….nothing….to….say….anymore

Embrace your Irrelavence(sp?), RNC

Hooray For Anything April 30, 2009 at 12:55 pm

Wow. Simply, Wow.

lukewarm April 30, 2009 at 12:56 pm

Only 19 seconds to read the three sentences of the opening? I was almost all the way through them!

lulzmonger April 30, 2009 at 12:57 pm

Yeah, go ahead, pull it, GOP – the Interwebs nevar forgets!

“A parody from the RNC” as a disclaimer would’ve looked a hell of a lot better on that “Numbers Are For Commie Faggots” Budget from a month or so back.

Gargamel April 30, 2009 at 12:57 pm

Brilliant … and by brilliant I mean utterly retarded.

This campaign is about Trucknutz

Crab1 April 30, 2009 at 12:58 pm

They realize that a parody must contain at least one (1) joke?

snideinplainsight April 30, 2009 at 12:59 pm

It’s the TelEPrompTers what made him by the dog, so that the people may be distracted and not notice his Change.

sati demise April 30, 2009 at 12:59 pm

Republican comedy?

Gorillionaire April 30, 2009 at 12:59 pm

[re=304686]Min[/re]: Please recall that a blow job scandal, a very destructive terrorist attack and two horrific wars were required to give Dubya a very dubious 0.000001% edge to stay in the White House.

ManchuCandidate April 30, 2009 at 1:00 pm

Amos? Andy? Kingfish?

hailripley April 30, 2009 at 1:00 pm

It’s like they threw up into my ears, a little.

jagorev April 30, 2009 at 1:05 pm

[re=304706]lulzmonger[/re]: Hey, now, they added some charts and numbers. For instance, there’s this, which is possibly the worst chart ever created by anyone:


LeslieBee April 30, 2009 at 1:06 pm

WHY I LOVE WONKETTE: You guys will fucking say fuck all fucking day long, but you use asterisks for the “n” word. Rock fucking on, motherfuckers!

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 1:06 pm

[re=304702]lukewarm[/re]: I actually thought it was buffering.

wonderboom April 30, 2009 at 1:07 pm


Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 1:07 pm

[re=304718]jagorev[/re]: That looks like a very aroused chart.

snideinplainsight April 30, 2009 at 1:08 pm

I mean seriously, this is about on par with video parodies I was producing in 6th grade (but without the mean-spritedness, pernicious falsehoods and latent racism). Are there ANY adults in the room over there at RNC headquarters? Hello?

trondant April 30, 2009 at 1:09 pm

I’ve seen amateur porn with better production. Hell, I’ve made amateur porn with better production.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 1:09 pm

[re=304719]LeslieBee[/re]: Nigger.
Happy now?

A Harlequin Bromance April 30, 2009 at 1:10 pm

We all know that wingnuts don’t understand satire, but I hadn’t realised that this also meant that they were atrociously not funny too. Where is Michael Steele or Michelle Bachmann when you need a laugh?

Gallowglass April 30, 2009 at 1:11 pm

The white dude doing the voice over slipped into his stock Bill Clinton impression voice a couple of times. Lamers.

suchsweetthunder April 30, 2009 at 1:11 pm

[re=304718]jagorev[/re]: Okay, first off — there’s no way that’s fucking scale. Secondly, she’s got the Bachmann eyes — they burn.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 1:11 pm

[re=304725]trondant[/re]: My dogs have made ameteur porn with better production.

JoeMac April 30, 2009 at 1:12 pm

The only adults at the RNC ride the short bus to RNC headquarters with helmets on.

AxmxZ April 30, 2009 at 1:12 pm

[re=304711]sati demise[/re]: They don’t do comedy largely because they simply can’t. E.g. – the Colbert Report statistics of conservative fail.

wonderboom April 30, 2009 at 1:13 pm

[re=304725]trondant[/re]: I’ve bootlegged amateur VHS copies of your porn with better production… with better production.

bitchincamaro April 30, 2009 at 1:13 pm

Waiting for the hip-hop version.

lulzmonger April 30, 2009 at 1:14 pm


They’re only about 2 trillion off on their Bush’s-last-day & current debt numbers – guess which way they erred?

Why don’t they just stick with their strengths? “The GOP: Payola, Pedophilia & Pure Hate” is a pretty snazzy slogan if you ask me.

Dave J. April 30, 2009 at 1:17 pm

I’ve seen better barely legal triple midget hentai scat anime tentacle porn with better production.

freakishlystrong April 30, 2009 at 1:18 pm

Whew, this should show the Republicans as the humourous, diverse, progressive party that they really are..really! Shat on them.

Hooray For Anything April 30, 2009 at 1:18 pm

This is what happens when you think Stephen Colbert isn’t satire.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 1:18 pm

I just stole this from HuffPo – wrong thread, I know.


Crank Tango April 30, 2009 at 1:19 pm

Worst. Bill Clinton Impersonation. Ever

imissopus April 30, 2009 at 1:19 pm

What does anyone expect from people who don’t realize that The Colbert Report is satire?

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 1:20 pm

[re=304747]Dave J.[/re]: Okay, you win.

engulfedinflames April 30, 2009 at 1:21 pm

HOORAY!!!!! that’s tellin’ em! it appears as though after stealing two elections and the media these buttfucking jizz rags started believing their own press. center right nation my ass. stupid ignorant lazy selfish populace who will believe anything, the past eight years was all your fault. fuck you humanity. is it any wonder i prefer the company of animals?

AxmxZ April 30, 2009 at 1:21 pm

I’ve seen dreams about ducks with better production.

sarcasticusername April 30, 2009 at 1:21 pm

why does that sound like it was narrated by bobby jindal failing horribly to sound black?

19kevin8 April 30, 2009 at 1:21 pm

When, oh when, will the authoritarian, totalitarian, socialiast commie, fascist, black panther muslin in disguise teleprompter stop from taking the gunz away from us real ‘merkins?

chascates April 30, 2009 at 1:23 pm

David Duke will be the next RNC chair.

binarian April 30, 2009 at 1:25 pm

[re=304719]LeslieBee[/re]: ‘Cause there’s really nothing wrong with the word Fuck…if you’re a fucking adult. But nigger is a pretty bad word, frankly, with a nasty history.

LydiaClaire April 30, 2009 at 1:25 pm

Christ on toast-tips; it’s just too easy. It’s like one of those canned hunts they’re ever so fond of (though it gets more fun when you shoot a person! In the face!). I’m bored w/this adversary.

BobLoblawLawBlog April 30, 2009 at 1:26 pm

Fred Thompson, was that you?

bitchincamaro April 30, 2009 at 1:29 pm

[re=304763]chascates[/re]: Reminds me, I think he got booted from Praque last week for espousing racist assholeism. Prague! They practically invented skinheads.

V572625694 April 30, 2009 at 1:30 pm

[re=304728]Custerwolf[/re]: You’re funny. And from last night (if you didn’t see my reply earlier this morning,) you’re welcome.

One Yield Regular April 30, 2009 at 1:30 pm

So next time some reactionary tells me to stop with the “race-baiting” when I suggest that the RNC is, despite Michael Steele, an exclusionary Ol’ Boys club for phobic whites, I can just refer them to: the RNC. Convenient!

Accordion-o-rama April 30, 2009 at 1:31 pm

I’ve cut farts with better production values.

thatonegirlsays April 30, 2009 at 1:31 pm

1. Why was the intro PowerPoint slide up for 15 seconds? That was a sentence, it doesn’t take that long to read a sentence.
2. Uhh, what happened to the RNC’s $crilla? That was some low-budget shit. I only made it in about 30 seconds before I had to turn it off to preserve mine eyes.

TGY April 30, 2009 at 1:32 pm

How clever of them to save money by getting Mrs. Murphy’s 9th grade English class to do the video production.

freakishlystrong April 30, 2009 at 1:33 pm

[re=304752]Custerwolf[/re]: Who cares?, (thread).. Good one!

TGY April 30, 2009 at 1:37 pm


rev_matt_y April 30, 2009 at 1:37 pm

I’d just like to take this opportunity to say that it’s astounding with all of the experienced talented entertainers at Big Hollywood that this is the best they could do? Ted Nugent wasn’t available to provide a score? Chuck Norris wasn’t available to kick the camera lens for 10 minutes (which would be more intelligible than his opinion columns)? Are the people in charge actually even aware that this was produced or was this done by some over-eager interns who got tired of fapping to photoshopped Palin pics?

mercure April 30, 2009 at 1:41 pm

For a political ad, that was worse than hilariously awful – at least it would have been hilarious.

It was just mind-crushingly, gut-numbingly dull. I couldn’t make it past the 50-second mark, and I’ve stared down 3-hour long insurance industry conferences without flinching. Oi, a perfect 10 on the Fail-O-Meter…

Hooray For Anything April 30, 2009 at 1:42 pm

[re=304789]rev_matt_y[/re]: And what about Dennis Miller? They couldn’t use him to teach them how to write jokes or does even the RNC realize he hasn’t been funny for years?

WadISay April 30, 2009 at 1:42 pm

Trent Lott does a terrible Barack Obama imitation.

x111e7thst April 30, 2009 at 1:44 pm

[re=304728]Custerwolf[/re]: Thank you

x111e7thst April 30, 2009 at 1:45 pm

[re=304719]LeslieBee[/re]: Now go fuck yourself.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 1:45 pm

[re=304777]Accordion-o-rama[/re]: Yes, I caught your segment “Silent but Deadly.

Rascalcat April 30, 2009 at 1:49 pm

When will the GOP learn that they do not have the humor to do parady well? They do hypocracy well, but that is mostly unplanned and serendipitious.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 1:51 pm

[re=304802]x111e7thst[/re]: Thank you.

rcdl April 30, 2009 at 1:58 pm

Well that was certainly a piece that should be up for an Academy award.

Hawaiiexpat April 30, 2009 at 1:58 pm

Tom Delay trying to channel Obama is like Michael Steele wearing his cap backwards “because that’s how we roll.”

There goes 3 minutes of my life I’ll never get back again – and all for the political version of a Vanilla Ice video.

Thanx for nothing, guys.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 2:02 pm

[re=304813]Rascalcat[/re]: Here, a little touch of the old spell check button and we’ll have that fixed up right quick:

(please don’t take offense, it’s just that I’m so suggestible, I’ll start mispelling those words if I keep seeing them like that).

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 2:04 pm

[re=304833]rcdl[/re]: The Academy of Psychiatry is handing out awards now?

Godot April 30, 2009 at 2:06 pm

[re=304718]jagorev[/re]: I love how the vertical changes representing debt increases get larger as the debt increases get smaller. And how the made-up debt increase projection they gave for 2012 is actually the smallest interval on the chart.

choom gangster April 30, 2009 at 2:08 pm

ACORN should sue them and use the money to get more poor people to vote.

On top of the “billions” that pundits seem to think was in the stimulus package for them of course.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 2:11 pm

[re=304850]Godot[/re]: I’m hiring a private tutor so that I may understand what you just said.

Mad Farmer Manifest April 30, 2009 at 2:23 pm

[re=304850]Godot[/re]: Scale not consistent. Bar at the bottom doesn’t show in the early 90′s when there was a DemocratIC majority. Lies in a graph! As a biostatistician/scientist, it makes me want to kill. Represent the data accurately, or there is a 95% chance of my kicking your ass!

Mara47 April 30, 2009 at 2:39 pm

[re=304687]Custerwolf[/re]: I noticed this. Also.

PsycGirl April 30, 2009 at 2:42 pm

I watched a whole 30 seconds and I’m pretty sure the voice-over was Strom Thurmond, still in his grave but speaking loudly.

user-of-owls April 30, 2009 at 2:46 pm

Better subtitle: “A Scary Thing Happened”

TeddyS April 30, 2009 at 3:04 pm

That dang clever Michael Steele is attacking with the technological whoopie cushions, using the innernets and bluberries and all sort of science fiction gizmos that the Dems cannot master. All is lost.

Bruno April 30, 2009 at 3:07 pm

Michael Steele must have had a blast putting on black face and voice and imitating Obambi

Mustang April 30, 2009 at 3:08 pm

Was that supposed to be funny? What the hell is reality-mode, and why is it hyphenated?

viviangrrrl April 30, 2009 at 3:10 pm

[re=304728]Custerwolf[/re]: [re=304802]x111e7thst[/re]: [re=304766]binarian[/re]: ummm, I thought lesliebee was serious.

zenferret April 30, 2009 at 3:13 pm

[re=304778]thatonegirlsays[/re]: It takes that long if you have to trace each letter with your finger and sound it out as you try to read.

Darkness April 30, 2009 at 3:13 pm

Apparently “honky with a georgia accent is the new black”

It would be merciful to take technology away from these guys, it only amplifies the stupid. So, I say we give we ask India to ship us their old computers so that we may donate them to the republicans.

Mustang April 30, 2009 at 3:18 pm

[re=304719]LeslieBee[/re]: Why do you write fuck but not nigger? And why does that make you love Wonkette?

Accordion-o-rama April 30, 2009 at 3:19 pm

[re=304850]Godot[/re]: You evidently didn’t understand the graph’s title.

LeslieBee April 30, 2009 at 3:22 pm

[re=304991]viviangrrrl[/re]: Thank you for being smart enough to get my post! Also, Custerwolf?–if you’re willing to say the n word, you don’t get to claim the high road. Sincerely fucking yours.

trondant April 30, 2009 at 3:24 pm

[re=304736]Custerwolf[/re]: We have more in common than I thought, so CALL ME.

trondant April 30, 2009 at 3:25 pm

[re=304740]wonderboom[/re]: Ha ha! Prepare to learn the Way of the New Flesh, sucker!

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 3:42 pm

[re=305022]LeslieBee[/re]: I fucking OWN the fucking high road. And I’ll drive on which ever side suits my fancy on any given day. You won’t ever hear me say “the n-word” ever. It’s nigger or nothing.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 3:44 pm

[re=305022]LeslieBee[/re]: That’s a classic: “thank you for being smart enough to get my post!” Self-congratulatory much?

lukewarm April 30, 2009 at 3:53 pm

[re=304884]Mad Farmer Manifest[/re]: At least they’re projecting a democratic majority through 2012.

lukewarm April 30, 2009 at 3:54 pm

Sorry, a “democrat” majority.

arewethereyet April 30, 2009 at 3:58 pm

[re=304725]trondant[/re]: ugh…we need to talk

El Pinche April 30, 2009 at 4:23 pm

This ad is entirely filmed in CAPS-LOCK.

cranky April 30, 2009 at 4:42 pm

i thought my fucking computer was broken. i kept looking, is it playing, did my connection die? ooooohhhhh riiight, they are nearly illiterate.

if i wanted to see bullshit pile-ons like the one lesliebee is getting, i’d hang out over at aol or redstate. that behavior is bullshit, y’all.

oldguy April 30, 2009 at 4:42 pm

As I recall, W gave TERRIBLE hypocritical supercilious self-satisfied frat-boy speeches WITH a fucking teleprompter.

I still remember when he spoke on the national TeeVee from the Texas capital (election eve 2000?) and his eyes would pivot from the screen on one side of the camera to the screen on the other side. Then a few seconds later his head would follow. I KNEW he couldn’t win the election.

Reality mode… That would be like Mission Accomplished or WMDs or cut the debt in half by 2006, or nobody could have predicted the levees wouldn’t hold, right?

Sometimes I hope Christians are right, so these slimebags can roast in Hell for eternity.

El Pinche April 30, 2009 at 5:03 pm

The GOP is trying hard to hold on tight to that 23% .

DustBowlBlues April 30, 2009 at 5:09 pm

[re=305155]oldguy[/re]: Bush seemed more natural at the teleprompter, because he couldn’t read one. For instance, he one night gave a speech and ended a sentence, we thought, with “commune” which was weird until he got to the next line and said “ity.”

I’m guessing that’s the last time they hyphenated a word for that moron.

The Rs get so hysterical when they’re down. They’re basically just lurching from disaster to disaster, getting more and more hysterical as Hopey gets more and more popular. Remember when Karl Rove was an evil genius the Ds could never defeat? OF course, the Ds didn’t. The Republithugs defeated themselves and along came Hopey.

TeddyS April 30, 2009 at 5:11 pm

[re=305187]El Pinche[/re]: That GOP approval rating is so yesterday.

DustBowlBlues April 30, 2009 at 5:15 pm

Tom Delay and Chris Shays are on tweety’s show, saying, I have nothing but respect for Tom but fuck you dickwad, I lost because of you. Delay: Chris and I worked in a very cordial relationship except when he wanted to personally kill that brain dead zombie if Florida.

Oh, and they both say fuck you to Specter.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 5:16 pm

[re=305154]cranky[/re]: Let me explain the problem I have, cranky. I have no problem with ANY word including the word nigger. None. Zip. Zero. Zilch. And anyone I hear say it in reference to black folks (it’s been years)has a problem much bigger than can be encompassed by any single noun. Why do people insist on giving words such power? Affirmations don’t work – and neither do derogatory statements – unless the person on the receiving end BELIEVES them. I hate that people are offended by goddamned words. That doesn’t mean I run around saying nigger (even when talking with my black relatives). If someone were to call me a mick, I wouldn’t know how to take offense. If they hate the Irish that much, that’s there problem, not mine. Just because someone doesn’t say nigger doesn’t mean they’re a charitable person. They probably just don’t want to get the shit beat out of them. That or their self-image will not allow it. I’s the law of reverse effect. The more you don’t want the word to have power, the more you invest it with such. The more you try to get rid of it the harder it holds on. So knock it off. Some people hate the word nigger the way others hate black folk (and micks). I think it’s all a bunch of shit. Word.

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 5:34 pm

[re=305220]Custerwolf[/re]: “The more you don’t want the word to have power, the more you invest it with such.”
Let me rephrase that – the more you restrict it’s use, the more power you endow it with. Ask a strident Catholic to say Goddamn or Jesus Christ. They won’t because it’s bad. Why is it bad? Because they BELIEVE it’s bad (thou shalt not take the Lord’s name in vain). Nigger doesn’t mean much to me, because INTERNALLY I have nothing for it to represent. I don’t give 2 shits about the history of the word, or the history of one particular race of people. I lump ALL people together into one hateful mass. Things happen to us as INDIVIDUALS not as groups. Fuck it, I’ll wait till after I smoke some weed before my next comment.

cranky April 30, 2009 at 6:06 pm

[re=305271]Custerwolf[/re]: not at all what i was talking about. my concern was not content, but form. the hostile, knee-jerk screaming someone down, for what was a fairly harmless expression of affection and opinion is loathsome to me.

a witty joke in return? some teasing? but screaming someone down for not following the “rules” of what someone is allowed to think on this topic of all thing? on the icky side. particularly because her opinion is thoroughly justifiable, as is yours, in political terms, and in terms of being simply humane. and frankly, i don’t think her comment had enough “in it” to let anyone reading it know what she actually thought, in any meaningful or complex way, and to claim the pile-on was “political” seems a little disingenuous.

no more talking! snark-on!

off-white working class April 30, 2009 at 6:32 pm

yeah lets move on from this discussion. back to the video. i couldn’t even make it thru the 1st 30 seconds. fucking twats

Custerwolf April 30, 2009 at 6:37 pm

[re=305338]cranky[/re]: Well,you see I missed the harmless affection part. My fault. Perhaps others made the same mistake.I suppose it was the angle from which we were looking that made us see her comment differently. So I agree with you – and thank you for defending her – all but for the disingenuous part. The pile on (at least in my case) wasn’t just for LeslieBee.

phineas_bounderby April 30, 2009 at 10:47 pm

Holy Jebedius!!!! I just watched the video a few minutes ago (and I did make it through the whole pathetic thing). How is anyone going to edit this “Barack the Magic Negro” inspired wackaloonfest to make it seem even intelligible? Thank you GOP for ensuring your own demise.

peorgietirebiter April 30, 2009 at 11:46 pm

Shorter Byron York: What I really want to do is direct.

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