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NEW STUDY PROVES IT

Wingnuts Who Watch ‘Colbert Report’ Don’t Know It’s Satire

You know what's funny? That 'Red Eye' show on Fox News!Not to be prejudiced or anything, but a short tour around the Internets pretty easily proves that conservatives don’t “get” satire or parody. Why? The answer probably has something to do with “belief in simple absolutes” and “sex shame” and “childhood brain damage,” and research from 30 years ago showed dogmatic people tend to be both dumb and unable to comprehend satire. And that’s why wingnuts don’t understand that Stephen Colbert’s Comedy Central parody of Fox News is, in fact, a comedic parody.

TO BE FAIR, a certain type of Libtard is also immune to satire and parody and comedy in general, as evidenced by the old joke, “How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?” (Answer: “That’s not funny.” This joke, obviously, predates our Modern Era in which lesbians are, indeed, very funny and often employed by the comedy industry.) It is our opinion that liberal types were not very funny in the 1980s and much of the 1990s — they were far too worried about saying something Offensive. It is this, and only this, that explains the prominence of P.J. O’Rourke in the 1980s.

Anyway, new study proves it, wingers really don’t understand comedy, and actual academics at Ohio State actually did a study to prove it:

This study investigated biased message processing of political satire in The Colbert Report and the influence of political ideology on perceptions of Stephen Colbert. Results indicate that political ideology influences biased processing of ambiguous political messages and source in late-night comedy. Using data from an experiment (N = 332), we found that individual-level political ideology significantly predicted perceptions of Colbert’s political ideology. Additionally, there was no significant difference between the groups in thinking Colbert was funny, but conservatives were more likely to report that Colbert only pretends to be joking and genuinely meant what he said while liberals were more likely to report that Colbert used satire and was not serious when offering political statements. Conservatism also significantly predicted perceptions that Colbert disliked liberalism. Finally, a post hoc analysis revealed that perceptions of Colbert’s political opinions fully mediated the relationship between political ideology and individual-level opinion.

Conservative Colbert viewers not in on the joke [Kottke.org]


12:58 PM on Wed April 29 2009
By Ken Layne
13634 Views

  1. Gallowglass says at 1:02 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Yes, I only pretend to hate you, thereby concealing my raging love-boner. You’ve caught me.

  2. MARCdMan says at 1:03 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Lol, dumbasses. Is anybody really surprised? We knew about this when Tom DeLay’s people tried to point to “hard-hitting” Colbert as their ally on his website.

  3. trondant says at 1:04 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Heh indeedy.

  4. Come here a minute says at 1:04 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Why would they need parody when they have self-parody?

  5. Custerwolf says at 1:04 pm, April 29th, 2009

    That entire paragraph is a joke right?

  6. engulfedinflames says at 1:04 pm, April 29th, 2009

    i once watched jon stewart with my moonie brother-in-law, he kept saying “what’s so funny, i don’t get it” and he never will.

  7. the bf says at 1:04 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I’ve often said that republicans have no sense of irony, but now I realize there is peer reviewed research showing that since reagan, we’ve been screwed in this country because the right wing can’t get a joke.

  8. Mild Midwesterner says at 1:05 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I have always known that O’Reilly is a raging liberal and a brilliant satirist.

  9. loquaciousmusic says at 1:06 pm, April 29th, 2009

    They didn’t get “Sail Away,” either.

  10. ihasasad says at 1:06 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Makes sense to me. It takes good ol’ down home smarts to be satirical and them bubbas ain’t got none of that! by golly!

  11. kthxbai...also says at 1:07 pm, April 29th, 2009

    “sex shame”, i haz it.

  12. Dave J. says at 1:07 pm, April 29th, 2009

    The thing that makes this especially hilarious is that the only time he WAS being completely serious–his White House Correspondents’ Dinner performance–is when he was completely bagging on Bush.

  13. BobLoblawLawBlog says at 1:08 pm, April 29th, 2009

    There are academics at THE Ohio State University?

  14. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:09 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Wut this iz iz obvi LIBRULS trying 2 say dat COLBAIR is NAWT cunsurvatice?
    NO WAYS. WIL NOT STAN.

  15. Yaybuls says at 1:09 pm, April 29th, 2009
  16. chauncey says at 1:10 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I used to notice this a lot in his crowd responses during the second year or so he was on. There were often odd people in his audience hooting in agreement with him during less funny moments - definitely not a “yes, stick it to the conservatives, with such sarcasm as this!” hooting. It actually kinda fucked up the show — it’s impossible to enjoy the sarcasm if someone is deliberately ignoring it — and I feel like they must have done something about it, because I don’t really notice it any more.

  17. AfghanVet says at 1:12 pm, April 29th, 2009

    They are the kinds of people who think throwing kittens into dryers is funny. Humor for dogmatics and righties is always centered around power, humiliation and violence.

  18. SpikeyDog says at 1:12 pm, April 29th, 2009

    This should not be such a surprise after reading some of the comments posted on Ken Layne’s AOL articles.

  19. AnnieGetYourFun says at 1:13 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I told that lesbian joke on my lesbian radio show once, and a bunch of lesbians called in to tell me that they didn’t get it.

  20. Dave J. says at 1:14 pm, April 29th, 2009

    chauncey: I think they started showing prospective audience members a photo of Michael Steele at the door, asking them who it was. People who answered “Michael Steele” were turned away; people who answered “Larry David in blackface” were let in.

  21. Serious says at 1:15 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Maybe this is why I think Wonkette secretly means the things “she” says.

  22. VelvetFist says at 1:15 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Well, the right-wingers also think that Glenn Beck speaks the truth, so they’ve already proven their capacity for discernment.

  23. AnnieGetYourFun says at 1:15 pm, April 29th, 2009

    chauncey: I would love to see that screening process.

  24. Capricatony says at 1:16 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Early wingnut detection can happen during the Jonathan Swift segment of 10th grade English lit. They are the ones saying, “So these are Mexican babies we’re talking about, right?”

  25. SnarkNotFark says at 1:16 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I was told there would be no math. What is this, fivethirtyeight.com? Nate Silver will not marry you, no matter how wide your standard deviation is.

  26. V572625694 says at 1:17 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I guess I’m a stoopid conservative, cuz I find this sentence gorgeous in its incomprehensibility:

    “Finally, a post hoc analysis revealed that perceptions of Colbert’s political opinions fully mediated the relationship between political ideology and individual-level opinion.”

    Actually, if conservatards think Colbert’s joking, aren’t they kind of one acid-trippy meta-step above us libruls laughing at him?

  27. ihasasad says at 1:17 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Also, could someone please explain me this: it is said that aaron schock is quite the smarty pants, breezing through his classes at Bradley and was able to finish in 2 years instead of four (is that proof that he is smart? I donut know) yet he goes on Colbert’s show. Why?

  28. Ken Layne says at 1:19 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AfghanVet: Yep. Or, in other words, “Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld,” 3 a.m. on Fox News!

    AnnieGetYourFun: Hahahah. Wait, why aren’t you promoting your lesbian radio show on Wonkette?!

  29. proudgrampa says at 1:19 pm, April 29th, 2009

    This would be funny if it wasn’t sad. Or would it be sad it it wasn’t funny? What does it all mean??

  30. Prommie says at 1:19 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Denial, can anyone say denial? They know Colbert is making fun of them, even though they don’t understand what it is about what he is saying that makes it funny. But they will never admit it.

  31. randem says at 1:20 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Interestingly, a related study found significant data showing that most liberals have absolutely no idea that Rush is Right.

  32. user-of-owls says at 1:20 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: Log Cabin Lesbians.

  33. magic titty says at 1:20 pm, April 29th, 2009

    The best thing about satire is the people who don’t get it.

    This study only confirms the obvious: People who think Stephen Colbert is being serious on a network called Comedy Central should be shot in the face.

  34. NebraskashireGentry says at 1:21 pm, April 29th, 2009

    this study just means everyone, regardless of political ideology, wants Colbert to represent their views. Colbert is an empty canvas upon which liberals and conservatives project their beliefs, while Colbert snickers.

    a fan of the hyper-extended metaphor that is a satire of itself, Glenn Beck more than fulfills my infotainment needs.

  35. ihasasad says at 1:22 pm, April 29th, 2009

    is there an equivalent on the other side, one that we may view to see what it is like?

  36. proudgrampa says at 1:22 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Capricatony: I just choked on my lunch! Good one!

  37. Naked Bunny with a Whip says at 1:22 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Okay, but what do conservatives think of LOLcats?

  38. ihasasad says at 1:23 pm, April 29th, 2009
  39. Country Club Jihadi says at 1:23 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Good, we can look forward to seeing some Florida Vanity Jesus Plate with TEA BAGR. Can’t wait.

  40. A natural extension of their inability to recognize satire is that any attempts at it on their part are generally dogshit.

    It’s a shame, really. The Democrats leave themselves wide open for lampooning literally every single day, but a core tenet of their opposition is “not being particularly clever”. In order to see liberals satirized, you have to wait for a liberal to do it. The most common conservative response, in fact, is to do something so mind-crushingly stupid it makes you reconsider being an independent.

  41. AnnieGetYourFun says at 1:24 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Ken Layne: Oh, that was YEARS ago. No longer have it. Hell, I’m not even a lesbian anymore. Hard to stay off the dick. Maybe that’s why they didn’t find me funny?

  42. Country Club Jihadi says at 1:26 pm, April 29th, 2009

    magic titty: Word.

  43. Ken Layne says at 1:27 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?

  44. V572625694 says at 1:27 pm, April 29th, 2009

    NebraskashireGentry: You said it better than I did. But Colbert is really doing parody, not satire.

    VelvetFist: Here’s a little test from the good old days, the California F- (for fascism) -scale.

    http://www.anesi.com/fscale.htm

    Was supposed to measure propensities toward fascism of the Nazi type, but still pretty much works.

  45. user-of-owls says at 1:28 pm, April 29th, 2009

    magic titty: Depending on what type of ammunition you use, that could leave them still capable of voting and/or reproducing. Might I suggest tin snips or pruning shears instead?

  46. Dave J. says at 1:28 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: You are rapidly becoming my favorite commenter.

  47. Dean Booth says at 1:29 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Getting satire requires holding two thoughts at the same time.

    Limbaugh once said the a liberal is a person who disagrees with himself. That’s the best definition of *thinking* I’ve ever heard.

  48. Naked Bunny with a Whip says at 1:31 pm, April 29th, 2009

    @AnnieGetYourFun: You’ve done a fine job of staying off mine so far. Pencil me in for a few minutes. Er….nvm.

  49. When I was an RA in college one of the kids on my floor was from rural Oklahoma. He asked me to keep the other people on the floor from watching the Daily Show on the common area TV. I asked him if he wanted me to ban the Colbert Report and he said that Stephen Colbert was fine because he obviously has the “right kind of values”. I had to bite my shirt and look away to keep from laughing. Then I signed him up for ManHunt.net later that week. He dropped out after the semester to go to Oral Roberts University.

  50. The whole “humorless liberal” thing reminds me of an old George Carlin *sniff* joke. Probably a little inaccurate, but whatev: “People say that some things just aren’t funny. You can’t tell a joke about them. Like rape. They say you can’t joke about rape, it’s serious. But that’s bullshit, rape can be funny. Picture Elmer Fudd raping Porky Pig. See? Rape is hilarious!”

  51. Cape Clod says at 1:32 pm, April 29th, 2009

    These are the same people who view Larry the Cable Guy as their version of David Sedaris.

  52. Hooray For Anything says at 1:32 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Ken Layne: Don’t forget that “Conservative Daily Show” ripoff Fox tried for like two weeks before realizing that to the average Fox viewer, there’s no difference between really bad humor and Sean Hannity.

  53. Mad Farmer Manifest says at 1:34 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I tried to get the whole article, but you have to have access to their archives. I could order it through work, but I’m pretty sure that isn’t ‘work-related’ use of library resources.

    V572625694: That’s fancy-pants statistics talk. It just means that ideology -> perception -> individual opinion. In other words, conservatards are incapable of understanding that they are being satirized because it would destroy their minds. And the study authors proved it with the magic of statistics.

    The real hilarity here is that these folks turned watching the Colbert Report and making fun of conservatards into a peer-reviewed publication. They will put this on their resumes. Goldbricking and nerdiness, FTW!

  54. bitchincamaro says at 1:36 pm, April 29th, 2009

    If Colbert hasn’t reported it yet, I can’t wait to see the bit, but also the reaction from the reactionaires. It’ll be a carnival inside a circus inside a clusterfuck.

  55. Mustang says at 1:36 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Naked Bunny with a Whip: They wonder why there are so many typos, but they think the kitties are cute. By the way, congratulations on having the comment of the week on CC.

  56. mookworthjwilson says at 1:37 pm, April 29th, 2009

    V572625694: Confirmed what I already knew…I am a liberal airhead

  57. DustBowlBlues says at 1:37 pm, April 29th, 2009

    How much pork barrel money was wasted on this? I live in rural OK. Anything they want to know about how retarded dumbass right wingers are, they could just ask me. Government waste! Rush O’Beck is right!

  58. CCcmells says at 1:37 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I thought the punchline for the lesbian joke was, “Three: one to change the bulb and two to make a documentary about it.”

  59. randomsausage says at 1:39 pm, April 29th, 2009

    They’re all probably seduced by the flapping eagle graphics at the beginning of Colbert. Them wing-nuts sure love their bald eagles.

    I like this one, with the stars ‘n stripes wings!

    http://www.strykerpack.com/sitebuilder/images/9-11-01_Eagle-383×379.jpg

  60. Elm Hugger says at 1:39 pm, April 29th, 2009

    It wasn’t that long ago that our then governor Blago the Great, was on “The Daily Show” as an interviewee. He went the entire interview not realizing it was a joke, then got mad at his staff for not telling him it was a joke. Look what happened next? He ran the whole state into the ground to get even with us. But we will get the last laugh, we will send him to a “resort” were he can play tennis for ten years and work on his tan….

  61. wheelie says at 1:39 pm, April 29th, 2009

    NebraskashireGentry: Indeed. Colbert likes to have it both ways, so to speak. It’s part of the appeal.

    As for PJ O’Rourke, I picked found my old copy of Republican Party Reptile recently and some of it is still pretty funny. He lost his nerve with CEO Of the Sofa, and I’ve never been able to take him seriously (?) as a humorist ever since.

  62. cranky says at 1:40 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Ken Layne: oh hell, she’s kissed your mother with that mouth.

  63. Custerwolf says at 1:40 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Ken Layne: I believe she already mentioned that she’s out of the lesbian business.

    Hey - I’m waiting for my car to warm-up.

  64. JimBob says at 1:41 pm, April 29th, 2009

    It actually took me a while to be sure it was satire, but not for the reasons implied above: I was unfamiliar with the fact it was a spinoff of The Daily Show when I started watching it, and I actually know a large number of people who truly believe this kind of stuff for reasons just as overly simplistic & ludicrous as the ones he puts out there that I thought it plausible that he wasn’t joking–even as I was laughing out loud at his antics.

  65. Mustang says at 1:41 pm, April 29th, 2009

    The Mallard Fillmore comic strip is a good exhibit for this case. It tries to be ironic, but he just doesn’t get it. So it’s just sad and dumb. Like a little kid telling dirty jokes.

  66. DustBowlBlues says at 1:43 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Hooray For Anything: I remember the ripoff the wingers at Fox launched. If was gone before I thought to watch it to see what it was like. There’s a simple reason that conservatives and humor don’t mix: You have to be stupid to buy the shit they put out, and stupid humor is limited to the standup comics at Branson (or so I assume–I’ve never been there).

    They don’t understand why the 3 stooges keep hitting each other. You can’t expect them to get Colbert.

  67. cranky says at 1:43 pm, April 29th, 2009

    CCcmells: i would go with: no one knows, they’re still processing the best way to go forward.

  68. Dr. Spaceman says at 1:44 pm, April 29th, 2009

    So, this isn’t a Puma Warblog? Fuck all you guys.

  69. zenferret says at 1:44 pm, April 29th, 2009

    So is this why we never see Russ Lieber any more?

    I miss him.

  70. Come here a minute says at 1:45 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Mustang: Rubber balls and liquor!!!

  71. facehead says at 1:46 pm, April 29th, 2009

    NebraskashireGentry: Glad someone said it. Who knows what Colbert really thinks? He’s a catholic after all (er.. right?), and catholics don’t fit neatly into either the librul or conservative box. On top of that, there are plenty of catholics who openly disagree with the pope, e.g. anal.

  72. Custerwolf says at 1:47 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Naked Bunny with a Whip: Oh, I think if you worked hard enough at it, you could even get a vagatarian to trade sides.

  73. LittlePig says at 1:47 pm, April 29th, 2009

    V572625694: Whoo hoo! I’m a whining rotter!

  74. Come here a minute says at 1:48 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Cape Clod: Git ‘er done = Me talk pretty one day

  75. snideinplainsight says at 1:48 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Ha.

  76. Accordion-o-rama says at 1:48 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Lots o fancy talk to say they’z got the dumbz.

  77. rev_matt_y says at 1:49 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Zadig: That is essentially the Carlin bit. And it is not only damn funny, but incredibly insightful as most of his comedy was.

  78. mookworthjwilson says at 1:49 pm, April 29th, 2009

    DustBowlBlues: Yakov Smirnoff is huge in Branson…”In Russia, The 1/2 Hour News Hour watches no one”

  79. Custerwolf says at 1:49 pm, April 29th, 2009

    cranky: Hey-OH!!
    Ken’s mom is no fur trader, I’m sure.

  80. heroinmule says at 1:50 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I once read a HuffPo comment (don’t judge) which declared that Keith Olbermann intends for his show to be satire. Yes, those breathy 15-minute rant/lecture/special comments do always make me laugh, so maybe that libtard was right. We are officially too fucking stupid for satire. The republic is dead if it wasn’t already.

  81. proudgrampa says at 1:50 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Custerwolf: No, that’s vEget — oh, I get it…

  82. snideinplainsight says at 1:51 pm, April 29th, 2009

    ‘Michele Bachmann Blames FDR’s “Hoot-Smalley” Tariffs For Great Depression’ - and you’re telling me conservatives don’t get teh funny?

  83. d4g33z says at 1:51 pm, April 29th, 2009

    magic titty: Not funny! Just kidding…or am I?

    Fritatta!

  84. LittlePig says at 1:51 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Mustang: Well, it’s hard to appreciate (much less create) humor when one is in the middle of a permanent rage-gasm.

  85. Wet Work says at 1:53 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Ok, but I still don’t get Wonkette.

  86. Mad Farmer Manifest says at 1:53 pm, April 29th, 2009

    mookworthjwilson: Me too. No surprise there. Apparently those fascists hate teh gehz.

  87. x111e7thst says at 1:53 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: quod erat demonstrandum: all lesbians are conservative.

  88. Custerwolf says at 1:53 pm, April 29th, 2009

    proudgrampa: You are so fucking adorable.
    Alrighty - it’s off to work I go now.

  89. Perry227 says at 1:54 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Wait, if conservatives are watching Colbert are they also watching the Daily Show? If so, what do they think of Jon Stewart? Do they think the Daily Show is Comedy Central’s attempt at being “Fair and Balanced”?

  90. Mad Farmer Manifest says at 1:55 pm, April 29th, 2009

    randomsausage: Yeah, they love bald eagles unless they interfere with their god given rights to spray DDT everywhere and shoot living things without restraint.

  91. V572625694 says at 1:56 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: Could there be anything hotter than a reformed lesbian? Any chance you were a conservatard too, and then saw the light?

  92. Naked Bunny with a Whip says at 1:57 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Mustang: Thank you. Now…kneel before Bunny!

  93. Reed Enwright says at 1:58 pm, April 29th, 2009

    V572625694: I’m a ‘liberal airhead’ … just.

  94. Czn939 says at 1:59 pm, April 29th, 2009

    V572625694: I got a 2.7!

  95. facehead says at 1:59 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Wet Work: What’s “Wonkette” ?

  96. Accordion-o-rama says at 2:00 pm, April 29th, 2009

    snideinplainsight: Al Franken and the Ecology Owl caused the Great Depression!

  97. aflurry says at 2:03 pm, April 29th, 2009

    V572625694: look, it’s simple. the odd levels are ironic, the even levels are sociopathic. or maybe i got that backwards.

    a conservative business owner in my old hood used to put reagan memorabilia and conservative rants in his storefront window. thought he was kind of a sweet old guy, actually. but one day he had a decidedly pro-choice single panel political cartoon in the window. ferget what it said, but it involved a pregnant girl, a back alley, and a coathanger. i spent a while trying to figure out how it could have been misinterpreted as pro-life without being scarily cruel and heartless.

    he’s dead now, though. so i guess i’ll just have to wonder.

  98. cranky says at 2:04 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Custerwolf: bullshit, why do you think he grew that beard?

  99. zenferret says at 2:06 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Reed Enwright: 1.77 I’m a whining rotter! Woo hoo!

    Mad Farmer Manifest: They loves them some pictures of bald eagles. Not lilving pooping bald eagles that don’t attack commies arab terrists.

  100. edgydrifter says at 2:07 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Perry227: Stewart is “of the tribe” but the bad (NY) kind, not the good (Tel Aviv) kind–ergo he is a horned-devil Jesus-killing librul moran.

  101. loquaciousmusic: Or “Short People”.

  102. randomsausage says at 2:12 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Re the whole lesbian/lightbulb thing. I know the traditional answer is “Two” — ie one to screw in the lightbulb, and the other to write a folk song about it. But these days, don’t we all prefer our lesbians to be of the lip-stick variety, or at least the Ellen variety? I mean, the love between two women is a beautiful thing: especially if they are hot, exquisitely groomed and shot in HD.

  103. BklynIlluminati says at 2:12 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Two lesbians walk into a bar…. Stop me if you heard this one.

  104. V572625694 says at 2:17 pm, April 29th, 2009

    aflurry: Yeah it’s funny, because you’d have to be moron or a conservatard not to realize that all the higher-numbered answers are authoritarian, who’s-your-daddy scary. An even halfway creative test designer would’ve reversed out some of the questions. The scariest two things about conservatards are (1) their firm belief that powerful people are working in secret; and (2) their certainty that these powerful people are also having way cool kinky sex.

  105. AnnieGetYourFun says at 2:18 pm, April 29th, 2009

    cranky: Ha! Beat me to it.

    randomsausage: Well, lesbians are finally allowed to be feminine. Back when I was a rug-muncher, you were considered a total sellout if you didn’t shave your head and pierce every extremity. Actually, it might still be like that. Damned if I have time to find out.

  106. Custerwolf: No “fur trader”? You mean those things are detachable?!

  107. President Beeblebrox says at 2:20 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Wingers have been hungering for a conservative teevee talk show with a live audience ever since Limbaugh’s teevee show was cancelled in 1996. But it still amuses the hell out of me that they think Colbert is a real conservative. I mean, wtf? One Tek Jansen cartoon should be enough to convince anyone that the guy’s a comedian.

    I guess the fact that the show airs on Comedy Central wasn’t enough to make its way through their meth-addled synapses.

  108. Czn939 says at 2:20 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Perry227: Did you ever see Jon Stewart on O’Reilly?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5pK7sK0i4A

  109. randomsausage says at 2:21 pm, April 29th, 2009

    A lesbian goes to the gyno for yearly check up:

    Gyno: “Yes, you’re all clear. In fact that’s the most spotless set of genitals I’ve seen in a long time. How do you keep yourself so clean?”
    Lesbo: “I have a woman in twice a week.

  110. Georgia Burning says at 2:25 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Somehow authoritarian types and their groupies on both sides lose their sense of irony. Change a phrase or two and Bill O’Reilly could be denouncing the counter-revolutionaries and saboteurs at the All-Union Conference of Soviet Journalists sometime in the 1950’s

  111. cranky says at 2:29 pm, April 29th, 2009

    randomsausage: uh, yes, American has always preferred that its lesbians be “pretend”.

  112. Mad Farmer Manifest says at 2:30 pm, April 29th, 2009

    V572625694: I don’t know if people in this country are freakier than the ancient Greeks and Romans, but I doubt they had furries. Also, judging by Wonkette’s readership, I can say we give them a run for their money on teh buttsecks. I just don’t understand how the conservatards think that if there was powerful people working in secret, they’d be liberals. They want to suppress our rights by making sure that they protect our civil rights. Wait, what?

  113. Pizzuti says at 2:31 pm, April 29th, 2009

    To be fair, how many of us watch South Park and think, “THEY’RE ONLY MAKING FUN OF INACCURATE STEREOTYPES OF LIBERALS, NOT LIBERALS THEMSELVES.”

  114. cranky says at 2:33 pm, April 29th, 2009

    cranky: america, no “n”. i cringe at me.

  115. forgracie says at 2:35 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: God, I love it when you talk like that….

  116. BadKitty says at 2:35 pm, April 29th, 2009

    1.333333333333333333333333333
    I’m a whining rotter to infinity!

  117. wickedlittledoll says at 2:38 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Sounds like another difference maker to me.

    http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com

  118. PerhapsSo says at 2:41 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Country Club Jihadi: Colbert needs that license plate. Wait, no. We need Colbert on a license plate. Can the Colbert Nation get on this?

  119. Robobot says at 2:41 pm, April 29th, 2009

    When I worked for a wingnut coffee shop I stole Stephen Colbert quotes to whip out during librul-bashing conversations with my boss between rushes. As painful as it was to work for a man who seriously believes that all Muslims are homosexual child molesters, at least he serves as an entertaining anecdote every time the topic of high-functioning retards comes up.

  120. Lazy Media says at 2:44 pm, April 29th, 2009

    NebraskashireGentry: Yeah, but only the religious left actually get what they want. In real life, Colbert is a libtard, but a liberation-theology Catholic libtard who loves teh gheys.

  121. Giant Robot says at 2:44 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Q: How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: None. The C Crane hand crank portable shortwave radio comes with an LED that provides enough light to read the preamble to the constitution after only nine minutes of cranking - assuming, of course, that your one of those elite “reading” conservatives.

  122. cranky says at 2:45 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Pizzuti: sorry, just you.

  123. superfecta says at 2:48 pm, April 29th, 2009

    mookworthjwilson, DustBowlBlues: I had to go to Branson often as a small child (granted, before it turned into ‘Branson’ but it was still pretty bad) so I’ve kept an eye on its progress. Are you trying to tell me that Shoji Tabuchi is not satire?

  124. Lazy Media says at 2:49 pm, April 29th, 2009

    facehead: What’s really stupid is this notion that there are only two sides, and that you have to pick one.

  125. FaunceyGardner says at 2:50 pm, April 29th, 2009

    DustBowlBlues: Why DO the 3 stooges keep hittin each other? I don’t get it, even though I’m a whining rotter…is it a penis-owner thing?

  126. Lazy Media says at 2:53 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: That’s only your urban, four-year-lesbian, college-girl bullshit. Most of the lesbians I know wear flannel shirts and drive pickup trucks, and they’ve been doing it since they were 12. They never really got into the political stuff.

    North Georgia, btw, is stuffed FULL of dykes for some reason. The Unitarian Church in Dahlonega has a lesbian majority.

  127. Naked Bunny with a Whip says at 2:54 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I doubt they had furries.

    Zeus was pretty obviously a furry. Dude was always turning into animals to fuck women.

  128. magic titty says at 2:56 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Pizzuti: You?

  129. slavojzizek says at 2:59 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Did conservatives think Colbert was not joking recently when he insisted that the church was right to persecute Galilleo for saying the earth goes around the sun?

  130. Mr Blifil says at 3:01 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Post Hoc? That’s after you spit, right?

  131. AnnieGetYourFun says at 3:04 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Lazy Media: Close. Rural, 7 year, pickup driving bisexual. But otherwise, yeah, pretty much that.

  132. assistant/atlas says at 3:06 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Ken Layne: Of course she would do that, it’s a brilliant idea…she knows the chicks on here are hip and the men are shameless….

  133. pat robertsons personal trainer says at 3:08 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Czn939: classic douchebaggery, “yeah. 87% of your audience is intoxicated.” good lord. what a fucking moran. you could film the daily show in an irish bar in chicago on st. patrick’s day and less than 87% of the audience would be drunk. that guy couldn’t be more full of shit.

  134. facehead says at 3:08 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Two lesbian peanuts walk into the park, one of them gets assaulted.

  135. That is so racist to say that Lezzies change light bulbs - they are empowered womyn.

  136. assistant/atlas says at 3:18 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: Please stop commenting. It is so hard to type with one hand.

    Just kidding, don’t stop. Seriously, don’t stop. Don’t Stop! PLEASE DON’T STOP, DON’T STOP, DON’T STOP-OHHHH.

    Okay you can stop.

    magic titty: I just quit reading after he wrote “How many of us watch South Park…”

  137. Robobot: “wingnut coffee shop”

    WTF is that? Dunkin’ Donuts? I thought coffee shops were hippie liberal places, starbucks, or my personal favorite Amsterdam style

  138. Well, the wingnuts in the dems are too busy being offended to watch much tele.

    The reason wingnuts on the left were even less funny in the 80s was probably the same reason conservatives are less funny now, they were a group run by batshit insane idealogues.

    Don’t worry, I’m sure once Barry slides a bit in the polls the dems will be back to running around screaming ‘RACISM!’ whenever they can.

  139. jrtoastyman says at 3:26 pm, April 29th, 2009

    wow that is truly awesome. The only thing funnier than someone being mocked is when that person laughs along because he or she thinks the joke is about someone else.

  140. McDuff says at 3:48 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AfghanVet: Hitting the nail on the head (or is that hitting the target at 1/2 mile?). If you don’t already have a real one, please accept this Doctorate in Sociology from Whatsamatter U.

  141. Schadenfried says at 3:52 pm, April 29th, 2009

    SpikeyDog: Speaking of which, I know a check is a check these days, but why is Ken writing for AOL? Isn’t that an online wingut bathhouse over there?

  142. Mad Farmer Manifest says at 4:01 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Naked Bunny with a Whip: I stand corrected. I forgot abotu all that. Do you think many of the Greeks themselves were furries, or just their gods?

  143. Stephen Colbert is so hot, ummm, er, what?

  144. Robobot says at 4:13 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Bruno: Well, since I don’t work or live there anymore…

    Gusto di Vita, Warrenton, VA. It’s just a drive-thru, but if the balding baboon of a man is working you can expect some very entertaining conversation. Hours of it, if you aren’t careful. He’s a nice guy, seriously, but he’s so insane it’s amazing.

    If anyone has encountered this man, please report back.

  145. themightysea says at 4:19 pm, April 29th, 2009

    In all seriousness, isn’t the fact that so many conservative elites have been revealed as total shit-eating hypocrites relevant here? Forgive the tortured syntax. The point is, you can’t get satire when all your leaders appear to be living the opposite of their teachings.

  146. Gallowglass says at 4:22 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Zadig: “Squeal like a pig!”

  147. proudgrampa says at 4:28 pm, April 29th, 2009

    superfecta: Shoji! Shoji! Shoji!

  148. Naked Bunny with a Whip says at 4:30 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Do you think many of the Greeks themselves were furries

    In a culture even more imbued with magical thinking than ours, I suspect that not only were there furries of some sort, but that there were more “weres”, people who think they physically transform into animals. Granted, they probably couldn’t get dates back then, either.

  149. liquiddaddy says at 4:50 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AfghanVet: I think that’s why some poor souls think Dennis Miller is “funny.”

  150. bitchincamaro says at 4:51 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Robobot: Reminds of the coffee shop I lived over in the 80’s, owned by two Greek immigrant brothers; one a certified communist, the other a nazi storm trooper. They could barely agree on how to boil water. One day a blind man with a seeing-eye dog came in, sat in the booth and ordered. Moments later Nick the Nazi threw him and the “filty” dog out, screaming about health department violations and such. Meanwhile, you should have seen the basement!

    This is the difference between libs and cons, I have learned.

  151. S.Luggo says at 4:54 pm, April 29th, 2009

    loquaciousmusic: Likewise Randy Newman’s “Political Science”.

  152. Gallowglass says at 4:56 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Pizzuti: Apparently, South Park’s creators get their panties in a knot if people say that they’re conservatives, either trying to claim them or denounce them. They think of themselves as “a pox on both your houses” types, but I’m inclined to agree that, while not wingnuts, they fall to the right of center. And that’s cool because they bring the funny, provided your sense of humor, like mine, runs to the crass and vulgar.

    Mad Farmer Manifest: We’re freakier than the Greeks and Romans, just more hung up about it (Thanks, Jesus!). We’ve had 2000 years to build on all that kinky shit they were doing and technology has only opened new doors for us. Romans never had latex fetishists or tentacle porn or any of the other awesome stuff the last 30 years have furnished us with.

  153. S.Luggo says at 4:59 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Also, Conserves fail to appreciate the subtle irony of the Periodic Table. They stupid.

  154. bitchincamaro says at 5:00 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Gallowglass: “tentacle porn “. Links, please.

  155. frumious_bandersnatch says at 5:10 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: Oh, the gender-presentation wars continueth, although there’s more latitude now than when I was a baby dyke (back then whore makeup & fishnets got me kicked out of Pride, say). But still, it’s very identitarian out there, even for Femmes. Anyway, please give my fond regards to the dick! I remember that rascal. I think he still owes me money.

  156. SPlaTz says at 5:18 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Republican humor list:
    Farts
    Burps (especially burping the alphabet while chugging some Pabst Blue Ribbon)
    Racial jokes
    Even more farts
    Gay Jokes
    Guvmn’t Jokes

    Democratic humor list:
    Satire
    Irony
    Farts (Hey some things are just universal)
    Reading Wonkette

  157. Robobot: I’m more a Dutch Flowers and Kadinski man. I was at those places monthly for like 4 years…I think

  158. Is “Ohio State University” and accredited instituion? Expect some local church to challenge them on that

  159. Can you not use -tard as a suffix please? Thanks.

  160. Come here a minute says at 5:42 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: Weren’t you one of the lesbian separatists of the 1970’s?

  161. hobospacejunkie says at 5:46 pm, April 29th, 2009

    kersy: Which one? Wingtard? Fucktard? Douchetard? You’re going to have to be more specific.

  162. Come here a minute says at 5:48 pm, April 29th, 2009

    kersy: We finally hear from the Southpark creators.

  163. font9a says at 5:48 pm, April 29th, 2009

    The F-Test is definitely the synopsis of Gravity’s Rainbow.

  164. Naked Bunny with a Whip says at 6:33 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I have a craving for Doritos for some reason.*

    *No, not because I’m high. Dammit.

  165. Mad Farmer Manifest says at 7:55 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Naked Bunny with a Whip: Thanks for the lulz.

    Gallowglass: Tentacle porn? Learn something new everyday. Glad I jumped in on this conversation.

  166. Jillie says at 7:57 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I think he’s got us all fooled and actually he is a scientologist.

  167. bonghitsforjesus says at 8:29 pm, April 29th, 2009

    I love it when a fellow southerner freaks out the bubbas. Fuck ‘em if they can’t take a joke!

  168. PsycGirl says at 9:15 pm, April 29th, 2009

    V572625694: I believe that is what my beloved husband refers to as “edu-speak”. It’s commonly seen in the written form on college campuses and is even more incomprehensible when said aloud.

  169. The Schadenfried PAC says at 9:40 pm, April 29th, 2009

    AnnieGetYourFun: Wait, you’re not a gay man?

  170. The Schadenfried PAC says at 9:41 pm, April 29th, 2009

    Gallowglass: The South Park guys claim to be Libertarian.

  171. mrpuma2u says at 1:23 pm, April 30th, 2009

    Heq: speak for yourself or at least not me. I am left of Rachel Maddow and I watch hella tv. DVR rules, you can blow thru the evil mind control commerce propaganda.

  172. Czn939 says at 4:55 pm, April 30th, 2009

    Colbert needs to take this a step further and claim that this report is bogus science like evolution, global warming, paleontology and heliocentrism.

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