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BORG  4:10 pm April 27, 2009

Borgen, of Borgen Project, Revealed

by Ken Layne

Oh fuck YEAH bring it.
Remember when these maniacs from the Borg Planet attacked Wonkette’s comments? When was this? A year ago? Last month? Who can remember. But then they were gone, as if crushed by their robot godhead. And then, today, we received this delightful email. A picture, of the Borgen Project? Yes, please!

EVACUATE THE CAPITOL!
Hmm, 3,000+ pixels wide … we can really get our Borgen off with this picture.

YES YES YES DON'T STOP DON'T STOP
!

OH GOD OH GOD OH MY GOD
Al…most …. there.


UPDATE: There is no update.

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 61 comments }

chascates April 27, 2009 at 4:13 pm

This is one of those Nigerian-type scams. Send him money & he’ll end poverty.
His own!

mrpuma2u April 27, 2009 at 4:14 pm

Sorry no way is the borg jester in any way connected with the seminal opus of R.E.M. his eyes are both more sad and creepy then the ones on that album cover. Besides I don’t think Michael Stipe woulda hit that.

bitchincamaro April 27, 2009 at 4:17 pm

[Insert obligatory "cum in hair" comment here]

PolicyWhore April 27, 2009 at 4:17 pm

lolwut!?!

The lack of symmetry that is this Borg queen’s face is angering me. Evolutionary and mating fail!

Lazy Media April 27, 2009 at 4:17 pm

Nice photography. It’s not hard to get the subject AND the Capitol in focus, with the right settings, but where’s fun in that?

ManchuCandidate April 27, 2009 at 4:17 pm

It’s either the crazy Sylar Eyes or the two caterpillars trying to meet on his Forehead.

PolicyWhore April 27, 2009 at 4:19 pm

Is he from Ohio? He looks like almost everyone I’ve ever met in Ohio.

BillyClubb April 27, 2009 at 4:20 pm

Is that hair or some type of fuzzy brown moss?

freakishlystrong April 27, 2009 at 4:24 pm

Rabbity..

hobospacejunkie April 27, 2009 at 4:24 pm

That gap between teeth in the right side of his mouth is begging to be filled…with a hard left uppercut. Borg deserves to fail for lack of humor in spamming comment sections. If this results in the deaths of millions due to lack of food security then so be it. The universe is a harsh mistress.

Schadenfried April 27, 2009 at 4:26 pm

‘Tevs. He looks stoned.

Texan Bulldoggette April 27, 2009 at 4:28 pm

This is the epitome of one of those guys your mom would try to set you up with. Mom knows he’s uglier than a one-eyed tom cat, so she keeps telling you that he has a good job & a nice personality.

Vartan84 April 27, 2009 at 4:28 pm

ALERT!!! Kay Bailey Hutchison, that maybe sorta ok not really one time not-VP nominee of one John W. McCain (or as he’s known to the youngins: “Meg’s dad”) has been ASSIMILATED BY THE BORG!!! Texas is not safe! Freedom is not long for this world!
http://www.theborgenprojectblog.com/2009/04/success-on-capitol-hill.html

Enrico Fuente April 27, 2009 at 4:30 pm

is it just me or does he look just a little stoned?

StephanieInCA April 27, 2009 at 4:34 pm

BLINGEE CONTEST PLZ.

Come here a minute April 27, 2009 at 4:34 pm

The United Nation’s Millennium Development Goals aim to cut world hunger in half by 2015 and eliminating it completely by 2025. An estimated $19 billion would eliminate malnutrition and starvation around the world. Our current defense budget is $522 billion, in comparison.

The Borgen Project (borgenproject.org) provides lots of information about this issue.

Mista Eko April 27, 2009 at 4:34 pm

Unless Lohr entices Commander Data to join them, I don’t think we have anything to fear.

pareene April 27, 2009 at 4:38 pm

FYI everyone you can find out more at http://www.borgenproject.org.

Deepthroat April 27, 2009 at 4:44 pm
WagTehGod April 27, 2009 at 4:44 pm

zomg they have hacked our commentz again with their bold typez.

gjdodger April 27, 2009 at 4:44 pm

I forget. Was this a Nadine thing?

hobospacejunkie April 27, 2009 at 4:45 pm

Has everyone gone Borg on me here? And why is all the text in bold? Maybe it’s just my browser. And isn’t that Pareene person hanging out at the wrong bar? Or has he been assimilated also?

Vartan84 April 27, 2009 at 4:45 pm

What the hell is this all about anyway, fighting world hunger or some guy with a caveman forehead? I’m serious, there is something off about naming such a thing after yourself. Millions of kids all over the world are dying of hunger, so I will just name a project after myself for everyone to worship which attacks this. It’s like picking any other insanely huge topic like “world peace” or “diseases” and spamming your name everywhere as the savior who might just do something about that awful thing! Only this kind of person would hire a professional photographer to follow him around Capitol Hill and take out of focus of him doing his important work, cause that sounds nothing but selfless. Seriously, how will all those millions of kids know who to worship when they get food from the UN tomorrow if they don’t have those great pictures to recognize him from?

Brendan M. April 27, 2009 at 4:46 pm

[re=300902]PolicyWhore[/re]: I was going to object, but he does look very Ohioan. For the record, though, I don’t look like that, and he is from Washington.

The Borgen Story: In 1999, Borgen was a 21-year-old volunteer working in the
Kosovo refugee camps, during the war and genocide. On the ground, Borgen saw
a need for a powerful organization that could put pressure on Congress and the
White House to step up efforts to address global poverty. The former
Firefighter/EMT went on to intern at the United Nations in Geneva and after
college he began developing The Borgen Project.

Needing funding to start the organization, Borgen took a job living on a fishing
vessel docked in Dutch Harbor, Alaska (same location as the Deadliest Catch).
All of The Borgen Project’s early funding came from Borgen’s time working in
Alaska, where the organization was developed and launched in 2003 from inside
the fishing vessel that he was living on.

Christ. I’m not going to make fun of this guy. I might follow him on Twitter, though! Probably not!

Mad Farmer Manifest April 27, 2009 at 4:47 pm

[re=300913]Schadenfried[/re]: [re=300924]Enrico Fuente[/re]: Dude is sooo baked. I’m going to hit him up for a donation.

linernotesdanny April 27, 2009 at 4:48 pm

This is the greatest website that has ever been, or ever shall be

queeraselvis v 2.0 April 27, 2009 at 4:48 pm

I just might hit that. WIth a canister of Bug-B-Gone.

hobospacejunkie April 27, 2009 at 4:49 pm

[re=300940]Deepthroat[/re]: Deepthroat proves once again that Blingee tells the truth better than real life.

Lionel Hutz Esq. April 27, 2009 at 4:51 pm

That looks like the kind of guy that would strangle a hooker he hired for a “massage” off of Craig’s List.

Come here a minute April 27, 2009 at 4:52 pm

UPDATE: The update is missing, and has been replaced with an extra bold tag or something!

J-Man April 27, 2009 at 4:54 pm

I think I saw him in “Bareback Power Bottoms.”

Ken Layne April 27, 2009 at 4:56 pm

[re=300962]Come here a minute[/re]: SHHHHH.

WallyPipp April 27, 2009 at 4:56 pm

Never take the brows of the Berry in vain.

Mad Farmer Manifest April 27, 2009 at 5:02 pm

The thing that gives me the giggles is that he chose this picture to reprsent himself. It was the best picture he was able to take.

bureaucrap April 27, 2009 at 5:03 pm

WAIT!!! — Are you saying that I can quit my day job, work the Hill (free reception food), attempt to pick up 24 year old legislative assistants, and get coverage from some of the most important blogs in the internet world, just by calling myself a “project”?

Well, then — stay tuned for “Bureaucrapproject.org” (or should it be “bureaucraproject.org”), open for business and reception attendance in 15 minutes. Our mission: a comprehensive revision of the US Code to put all laws in alphabetical order.

And I will never spam “wonkette”. Faux news, on the other hand, is another story.

gurukalehuru April 27, 2009 at 5:06 pm

I’m actually fairly cool with the Borgenauts, but what is up with the bold type?

pondscum April 27, 2009 at 5:08 pm

[re=300940]Deepthroat[/re]: Jeebus! I almost choked on a piece of apple with that one!

Merry Christen April 27, 2009 at 5:08 pm

I wouldn’t fuck that guy with Obama’s dick, Karl Rove pushing and Sara K. Smith taking the blame. I would, however, let him buy me a coupla drinks. Just sayin’.

Mr Blifil April 27, 2009 at 5:11 pm

He’s not exactly my favorite, but this cheap joke is an enormous disservice to young Peter Buck.

wonderboom April 27, 2009 at 5:13 pm

I guarantee he sends this pic to girls who were marginally nice to him in high school, with the caption:

“Just livin’ the dream… What’s going on with you?”

I promise he does. Promise.

Sussemilch April 27, 2009 at 5:24 pm

Is that a morsel of leftover lunch or does he have peasant teeth?

prizepig April 27, 2009 at 5:40 pm

Looks like his father was a three toed sloth.

Min April 27, 2009 at 5:42 pm

What, exactly, is the project? Helping him find a hairdresser who doesn’t hate him?

Guppy06 April 27, 2009 at 5:46 pm

[re=300931]Come here a minute[/re]: Old meme is old

pdiddycornchips April 27, 2009 at 6:06 pm

That dude is smoked up like a herring. Trust me, I know about this shit.

NebraskashireGentry April 27, 2009 at 6:09 pm

the group he’s president of (The Borgen Project on Capitol Hill last week) has a really specific name, to the point of being meaningless.

commas, publicists!

NebraskashireGentry April 27, 2009 at 6:13 pm

[re=300919]Vartan84[/re]: the Borgens use Blogger. (amateurs.)

Tommmcatt April 27, 2009 at 6:19 pm

[re=300947]Brendan M.[/re]:

That all sounds so…earnest. Yuck.

I hate earnestness.

Holy Cow!! April 27, 2009 at 6:44 pm

Is he like the Borg?

Resistance is futile maybe?

ShamWow April 27, 2009 at 6:49 pm

He looks just like my coworker who talks to himself incessantly and reeks of marlboros and fabric softener sheets.

Jukesgrrl April 27, 2009 at 7:46 pm

Hey, who can’t photoshop themselves in front of the US Capitol? I can photoshop myself on stage with Bruce Springsteen. Will people send money to me? How about if I photoshop Greta Van Sustern in bed with Sarah Palin and E-mail it to K-Lo? Will I get money then?

Brendan M. April 27, 2009 at 7:47 pm

[re=301068]Tommmcatt[/re]: I’ve noticed that about most Wonkette-enthusiasts. Denby and I do not approve. I appreciate earnest do-gooders, as someone who indulges in the practice occasionally myself. They should have a sense of humor, but they are not monsters.

lawrenceofthedesert April 27, 2009 at 7:52 pm

Ah, yes, Borgen — I loved him in Grant Woods’ “Kosovo Gothic.” Almost didn’t recognize him without the pitchfork.

Studge April 27, 2009 at 7:57 pm

“Now I’m not feeding off you I will rearrange your scales
If I can and I can
I wish to eat each one of you and you, me, you”

The Global Food Security Act is made of people! PEEPOLE!

Come here a minute April 27, 2009 at 8:41 pm

[re=301038]Guppy06[/re]: There’s no meme like an old meme. And “meme” is an old meme, also.

Bruno April 27, 2009 at 9:33 pm

Is there an uncropped view showing me if he has a flag pin? Otherwise I won’t know if I should take him seriously or not.

engulfedinflames April 27, 2009 at 9:38 pm

dudes loaded.

Bruno April 27, 2009 at 9:39 pm

How many of those brainwashed girls who were commenting here did he do? I’m guessing the guy is hung, or it was really just him, acting like a chick.

gurukalehuru April 28, 2009 at 6:07 am

What is the life expectancy of a meme? Can they reproduce and evolve?

Brendan M. April 28, 2009 at 11:36 am

[re=301355]gurukalehuru[/re]: They are cultural viruses, so they can reproduce and adapt. They are like the swine flu, but (arguably) funnier.

AnnieGetYourFun April 28, 2009 at 3:38 pm

[re=300940]Deepthroat[/re]: Awesome.

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